I finally came out to my fiance' about my dressing fully. I have been together with her for over 7 years now and I have been closet crossdressing for quite a few years now on and off.
I hinted to her when we first started dating in which she didnt show any interest. So I decided not to delve into it too much at that time since we were really fresh into our dating. Then about three years in she found a site of CD fiction I had looked at and confronted me about it which at that time I told her that crossdressing is something that fascinates me and I love the feel of the feminine materials. Once again she was pretty against it, so i tried to surpress my dressing but once again it came back. I did it behind her back and felt really bad about it but didnt know how to come clean and tell her. The relationship continued to move forward and I proposed to her this past summer.
about a month ago I finally was able to come clean with her and tell her that i had been dressing on and off for years and that i fully dress with makeup and everything, i told her that i wanted to be completely honest with her and not hide anything from her. So i told her i frequented this site and that i go on cam chat occasionally. Things were extremely dicey for a few days because i didnt know if i was going to lose her because of my secret. we finally were able to talk about it and said that we didnt want to lose each other however she cannot support me wanting to dress and doesnt want me to at all. I told her the best i can offer is that i will no longer hide it from her and do it behind her back, i would let her know if the urge to dress came about. Well i have been trying to surpress it, but i have been having these slightly nagging urges to dress and as hard as it was for me to come clean to her before, its just as hard to tell her im having these urges. i will continue to try to surpress this but i had to air out how i was feeling. its really sad.
i know keeping the secret originally wasnt fair for her but as you know it is an extremely difficult thing to bring up.
im torn...