I told my wife early on. Worked up slowly to full dressing with forms and wigs coming someway down the road. Has moved from me borrowing what she doesn't want to her buying me clothes, then wearing them herself!
I told my wife early on. Worked up slowly to full dressing with forms and wigs coming someway down the road. Has moved from me borrowing what she doesn't want to her buying me clothes, then wearing them herself!
My wife was able to get to accept that I am a cross dress. Best thing I ever did. Hopefully I have become a much better person as a result. It has turned into a amazing journey of self discovery.
If it was easy, everyone would be doing it.
Both 1st and 2nd wife were told well before we married. The divorce form 1st wife had nothing to do with crossdressing.
Hi cddj nice to know she is ok with it, I told my gf after 3 weeks or so, thats 13 years ago, still going strong
it was her suggestion to see me in a skirt, things rolled from there.
Like many, My SO was quiet aceepting of me and love her much for because of it! took 4 years to tell her but, better late than never right?
My second wife and I have been married for 8 years now, but I've known her for about 20. I told her when things got serious a couple of years before we got married. I think she believes it is sort of fun as she's always trying to feel me up when I'm dressed at home.
My other half now wants to take me out to buy me something nice and sexy for my birthday next week, I am sooo excited
So happy this is going well and the two of you are having fun with it! Keep it slow, go at her pace, and you'll have many good times together!
18 months ago. Told all after being partially busted about a month previous.
I've got my own clothes now and get to go out as well.......marvellous!
Rebecca
Coming out to my wife has improved our relationship in every single way, she has open many door I didn't know existed,our intimacy has reached a place I never knew existed. I love her more today than the day we met,for allowing me to grow, recognize and accept who I am.
Couldn't have said it any better than Michelle V. Good luck , and keep communicating. Hugs
Follow your path.. For only you can decide, which way to go.
I had been in relationship with my wife for 4 years before we got married. 6 months after the marriage, I told her about my CD 2 weeks ago via phone, because we are now separated due to my work.
Currently she is not only ok with it but also wants to buy me some new clothes when we are together next month. It makes me like the happiest man in the world, and I love her more than ever.
However she has never seen me dressed, I hope that she will not be turned off.
I told my wife about 3 years ago. We have a DADT relationship. Any serious relationships before that...once they found my stash I was told to basically get out, we are done.
theccdj, I had told my wife about my CD'ing really only a year or so ago. But she knew of my panty wearing while we were dating. Only lately has it moved to full on crossdressing with her support and encouragement. She actually bought me some bra inserts a few weeks ago. The picture that is my avatar is one she took as well. Having my first wig and doing my 1st makeup only occurred a few months ago. I love looking at myself dressed up and feel that I am the person I was meant to be in girl mode.
Moms know everything you do! (atlest moms of my generation anyway.) They may not always let on they know, but they do. If you're into an activity they disagree with, they may be in denial, but deep down, they still know.
I kept it a secret from my ex-wife, and it was her reason to leave me. I know this was not the true reason we ended our marriage, but in the long run, it was best for us to both move on. After she found out about me, I took time to understand this part of me, and decided to be honest with those I dated after my marriage ended. Most were not excited about this, but I made good friends. 6 months ago I met a wonderful lady, and I was honest to her from the beginning. She had time to research this on her own, and asked good questions. Because I understood what it really meant to me, I was able to answer many of her questions. She is open minded, and I mixed some suggestions of activities with my dressing that would be fun for both of us (shopping, sharing clothes, just having fun with this part of me). We have been building up a wonderful relationship.
I think one basic point is we would want anyone we get close to in our life to be honest with us, so it is only fair we be fully honest with them.
yes by all means. If you haven't told her yet you will have to at some point if the relationship is going anywhere. Be prepared for the basic common questions:
- Are you gay?
- Do you want to become a woman?
- Have you been wearing my things?
- Who have you told about this? Who else knows?
She knows and doesn't care. She's the best.
Told my wife before we got married, I thought it was best to be honest about me from the beginning.
I would love to. But alas, I know how she feels about it. I did wear one of her nightgowns to bed a few years ago and she totally freaked out.
Mine has know for more than 30 years. She is fully supportive and we have fun with it.
My wife knows. I didn't tell her but she found out (why do we think we can hide this?) DADT ever since. I am so much happier that she knows and still loves me.
Teri Ray Rural Idaho Girl.
For years I made the mistake of trying to keep it a deep dark secret and then telling my girlfriends/lovers/partners AFTER they had fallen in love with me and vice versa. It always back-fired. If a woman was attracted to be because I was masculine, then she would be turned off when she found out I was feminine. On the other hand, the women who got to know me a feminine liked me even MORE when they found out that I was a cross-dresser.
There were probably times when I was almost clownish, trying to pretend to be masculine, even "macho" when it was actually so unnatural to me. On the other hand, once I finally let my secret out in the open, and shared it with others, I had many wonderful NEW friendships that wouldn't have existed with the old persona. Once I came out fully, there were women asking for my phone number, women wanting to introduce me to their (bisexual) girl-friends, and trying to fix me up with some really wonderful women.
Since the relationships were based on honesty, they lasted MUCH longer. Even the "one night stands" lasted 6-18 months. A couple lasted around a decade, and one lasted 15 years before she decided that she wanted to live in Provincetown MA even though I had to be near a major airport to travel to work. I was also a city girl and she liked the country. I've been with my current SO (now wife) or over 9 years now.
The real question is how hard you have tried to hide your secret by looking, acting, and being as masculine as possible. The bigger the gap between the you your partner knew and fell in love with, and your feminine side, the harder it will be to address issues after the big reveal. She will feel deceived anyway, but if you talk about being "the man", and refuse to do "woman's work", and make fun of "girl talk" and tell her how you hate shopping - she will feel like it was ALL a lie, which it was. If you are that good about those lies, what else have you lied about?
On the other hand, if you watch "chick flicks" together, cry during the right parts, and love cuddling, then she won't be all that surprised when you let her know about your dressing. She may have even fallen in love with you because you had such a nice soft feminine side. She may have been afraid to bring it up with you because she was afraid you would be upset and that it would threaten your masculinity.
I actually had three of my pre-reveal lovers tell me that part of what they loved about was that I was so feminine, one even told me that making love to me was almost like making love to a woman. Unfortunately, at that time, I was terrified that if ANYONE found out, that the terrible abuse, beatings and trauma I had experienced as a child would start again, so I refused to admit how strong my feminine side really was. Too bad too, I think there were two or three who would have really liked it, and another who might have introduced me to one of her friends.
What I have found is that it's not only important to tell her about the dressing, but also to share your fears about telling her. This is a good time to share your fears and feelings around it, as well as any negative experiences you've had in the past, such as being bullied for being a "sissy" or being perceived as a homosexual. This will help her to understand how much courage it is taking for you to EVER tell her, even if it's been a secret for a few years (or decades).
Facebook - Debbie Lawrence
Web - [URL="http://www.debbieballard.org"]DebbieBallard.org{/URL]
See also:
Open4Success
My wife knew that I liked to underdress from the start of our relationship almost 20 years ago. She had no problem with it and even bought us matching panties to wear. She also knew that I loved to fully dress but wanted no part of that so we settled into a DADT situation that worked for us. Last February she sat me down one day and told me that she would be fine if I wished to dress openly around the house. Now I spend a lot of my spare time at home wearing what ever I choose. She has even complimented me on some of my clothes and asked me why I don't choose more fashionable male clothes since I like colorful female clothes so much. We have very open communication and I work very hard to give her as much of the male me as the female me. I love her so much.
Hugs
Ellen Jo
Somtimes the light's all shining on me, Other times I can barely see.
Lately it's occured to me.....What a long strange trip it has been.
Truckin by the Grateful Dead
