I agree they are valid. But with 3 months short of 25 years married, the alternative is divorce based solely on this. Everyone around us think we are the perfect couple. Marriage is full of compromises - each couple needs to decide how much each needs to bend. With both of us passing 50, we do see more evidence the end is not very very far away. Both are getting more selfish in wanting to be happy. Yet my happiness in this is her unhappiness. So a compromise must be reached if we stay together.