In case of my childhood trauma definitely has made me aspiring crossdresser.
Constant ijime by dudes very look Mongol and my maladjustment to Korean totalitarian education system
even have made me hate Asian guys especially Japanese/Korean dudes.
In case of my childhood trauma definitely has made me aspiring crossdresser.
Constant ijime by dudes very look Mongol and my maladjustment to Korean totalitarian education system
even have made me hate Asian guys especially Japanese/Korean dudes.
I suppose that most people have some kind of trauma in childhood, be it the death of a loved one or family illness for example. Thats just the way that life can be. I also think that we live in a society where there at times has to be a blame for everything. Personally I dress the way I do because I find some female clothing very comfortable to wear . It is a lifestyle choice that I have made.
I agree with Allison, Taylor and Tracii. Why can we not simply enjoy our crossdressing without engaging in some psycho-babble filled quest for some thing/person/event to blame for our proclivity? Sheesh....pull up your panties and stop taking things so seriously. Life is way too short.
I too, had an awkward childhood. I wasn't as athletic as the boys, not as feminine as the girls. I didn't know any better, just that I was a boy.... I don't know what exactly made me first try on my sister's panties, but it was magical!!! I was about 11 or 12 I think. I know I shouldn't I don't know why I did it, maybe cause I really admired my sister? wanted to be like her? I just felt "right"???? I am far from passable, this much I know! I just feel so sensually complete when I am Jessica!!! I tried to reject her on several occasions.... but she is soo stubborn and wouldn't leave!!! now I am just so glad she stayed! without her... I would be lost! I do have a wife and typical... Jessica is the other woman!!! and she is not welcome when the wife is home! I dress as much as I can, shave, and under dress constantly!!!
"Life is Always a Bed of Roses........ Sometimes it's All Flowers, and Other Times, It's All Thorns!!!!"
Luv, Jessica XOXO
I've read those. Problem is, there are apparently plenty of 'normal' people who have those same PET scan results that have no gender issues at all. So much for that theory. Thing is, every single thought is just a simply collection of chemical changes, down to the electron (and further). I don't know when science will develop the capacity to figure out exactly which is the defining mechanism of what thoughts we have. Just a matter of time, I suppose, but as it's sort of unethical to do the kind of invasive experiments on humans, It probably wont' happen any time soon.Originally Posted by jeanieinabottle
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
I had a great childhood. Caring family, did in well school, played a varsity sport, could handle myself in a scrap. I'm kind of a weird introvert so never had a large circle of friends, but the ones I had were pretty good, and people in general mostly respected me. I think my dressing is largely related to having a mind that wants to explore a lot of different possibilities in life and gender variation is one of the more provocative subjects to explore in that way.
The opinion that you quoted sounded to a large extent like the rantings of "Science Deniers" who insist that homosexuality is a choice.
I started when I was about 7 years old so for myself it must be biological? No bad childhood.
In my opinion if your looking for an excuse or a traumatic experience to make you feel better about the way you dress then you are doing it all for the wrong reasons and not enjoying it as much as you should be.
Sure there are those with real gender identity issues and that I fully believe and understand.
But if you want to over analyse it and say I dress because I saw my dog hit by a car when I was 12 then perhaps the real problem is that you can't or won't accept yourself for who you are and what makes you happy.
Worst part about that is that you won't be happy until you can proudly stand up and say "I am a cross dresser and I do it because I am fabulous"
Sex Positive
I was the victim of childhood sexual abuse (CSA) at the ages of 3 to 5. I have always, as long as I can remember, wanted to be a girl. But never a TG, just a real bio girl. Just wake up one day and POOF! I'm BIO female. My brother is 2 years older than me, abused by the same older male cousin, and while he did cross dress in HS & college a bit, he doesn't have the same desire for it that I do. I *do* have a lot of problems with sex and anger due to the CSA and other facets of my skewed point of view due to it. But I know that many girls and boys are assaulted and are NOT CD or TG, some are gay and some are not. I think my gender identity issues come from that, but there are other things in other boys that can cause that. I'm not a psychologist. I can only speak for myself. for me CD is my private little sandbox, and I really don't want to join in it with anyone else. My wife is aware of it, is OK with it and doesn't bother me about it. Ultimately it is our individual choice as to how we express this side of our personality. There is no "right" way or "wrong" way or "right or wrong" reason to do it. *In general*, If it doesn't cause pain (i.e. "damage-type" pain, drawing blood or hurting permanently, not BDSM) or isn't dangerous, or illegal, to you personally or someone else, Then it is OK. It's Fine. Sex in most forms is an OK, positive experience. I would be overstretching my own boundaries to say "you should experience things this way." To say "THIS WAY WORKS FOR ME" is OK. I mean go to virtually any porn site. look at how many specific categories there are. People are into and want every possible thing.
I feel strongly that this is an individual journey, just like the rest of our individual sexualities and sexual identities. Getting hormones and going out "en Femme*," would not work for me. I would not enjoy it, so I don't do it. I did spend a few hundred dollars (I have that money now) on new breast forms, wigs and a corset and bra. I haven't had the money to do this before. They should be here today. I'm really looking forward to it. A close friend since high school, (35 years) is gay and she's been relating some helpful info about how I can resolve my anger issues. It's very helpful, but separate from my CD. I personally view cross dressing as separate from transgendered because it's just easier for me to keep straight. Nothing deep. Cross dressers wear women's clothes but have no plans to have sex-reassignment surgery. Transgendered people plan to have the surgery at some point. Just a way for me to organize my brain. nothing personal for or against anybody. We all should try to do what we think is right for us and our loved ones.
Dawn Michelle
*For those who don't speak French: "en Femme" is pronounced "on Fahm" and literally translated means "in Female"
Last edited by Katey888; 02-27-2015 at 06:55 PM. Reason: Removed link - site home page breaches our rules
Une femme cachée ?* l'intérieur de moi
(the hidden woman inside of me)
Correlation does not prove causation, despite what the majority of current news media companies seem to believe.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
In response to sometimes_miss,
I'm not sure that plenty and "normal" are real good statistical or medical terms. But I do know that when the studies with the PET scans were done, those that I've read, the p values which determine statistical significance and validity were high enough to suggest that there might be something to the study. Having participated in a number of medical studies, It would be rare to see studies that are 100% in anything and if I read one of those, I almost automatically think it is flawed since that doesn't happen because there are always outliers. Normal is often considered 2 standard deviations from the mean which means that there will always be some (not plenty) outside the bell curve. Also not sure what can go beyond electrons.
but my original premise was that even though there are some medical suggestions concerning gender identity differences, it is much more of a multifactoral problem and to think that everyone is the same and has the same reason is pure folly. If someone wants to blame this or that, I have no problem with that since it is their life and who am I to suggest that I know their life or how they think. As for me, my childhood was good. Therefore, I have no regrets and I feel that I was meant to be who I am and I'm perfectly happy and content with that. Thats Life!
Dr. J
Last edited by jeanieinabottle; 02-28-2015 at 12:47 AM. Reason: in response to sometimes_miss
I was thinking, this may not be that deep. GGs have a lot more freedom when choosing to express their sexuality / clothing. Men are more strict. i.e. a woman can wear tight jeans and boots and a cowboy hat, or a skirt, or a pair of sweat pants and t-shirt, etc. To maintain my "manly" image the cowboy boots and hat are the only sure thing. Even sweat pants and a t-shirt can be looked at as "wrong" in some circles. And what happens when you put a cover on a pot and turn up the heat? It boils over. Seems simple. I'm content with the level I participate in CD and have a supportive wife to boot. I don't think there is going to be a correlation between cross dressing and Childhood Sexual Assault (CSA). There are many traumas suffered by children all over the world, (War, natural disasters, etc) and we don't see an increase in cross dressing. CSA and cross dressing hasn't been studied enough but I doubt there is one there either. The important question, is does it matter? Does it make CD bad, good, or inevitable? Again, It doesn't hurt anyone, so have fun with it.
Une femme cachée ?* l'intérieur de moi
(the hidden woman inside of me)
Reflecting back, again, I realized that perhaps the trauma I experienced was that my father and mother yelled constantly and loudly when I was very small. By five he no longer lived there and visited very seldom. Whether it was a trigger for CDing, I doubt, having little to do with my attitudes ten years or so later. I was abused at about ten, but I have always considered it minor, except that I still remember it vividly, so apparently it wasn’t so minor. Effects towards CDing? I couldn’t say without therapy.
I liked sometimes miss’s categorizing of male/female traits, but they don’t work much to me, except that perhaps I am caught in the middle of them, expectedly. I can multi-task, I have good spatial capabilities, but whether I think like a girl or not? I can’t say, I don’t really see the difference, which may explain itself I guess?
In the long run, I expect I would have been CDing, or even considering myself TG, but probably more for genetic reasons than experience. Why I was abused was probably because I was effeminate at the time.
Sorry to go off subject, but I love language and words: Katie888, what is a budgerigar, and jennie_cd, what is boojum. I love being able to talk around the world and learning the specifics of so many different aspects of people I’ll doubtfully ever met face to face.
Oh, Dawn Michelle: you have a lovely eye. :-)
My dad wasn't around but I lived in a loving home, I didn't have any particular male role models but I grew up playing football with the guys, watching Jurassic park and Star Wars and playing with action figures. I once crossed dressed an action man figured I had because I thought it would be interesting.
I would imagine it is just genetics and bad luck that we have to turn into something good, no trauma would cause that.
There is the stereotype that hookers and strip dancers were sexually abused but I read an article once from a sex worker stating that women who are abused or raped are afraid of sex and it is the last industry they would end up working in
My only childhood trauma was getting caught dressing , two sisters and I started dressing at 6 lol . when I was in my teens my sister when mad at me would ask what color panties I was wearing , pretty traumatic for me anyway.
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