I defend the right for anyone to dress as they want - lingerie, short skirts, etc. At the same time, some pictures are best posted in a section such as Risky Business where they fit better with the genre and avoid concerning our partners.Originally Posted by Sara Jessica
Jen,
It's something I wouldn't do ! Some of the replies mention certain sites on the web where you can see some pretty explicit stuff ! When I really got into buying my own underwear I visited some of these sites as a turn on ! You call it incongruous, I would go further and say a revolting turn off ! One of the reasons I started shaving my legs was seeing overweight men squeezed into undersized underwear trying to look sexy in stockings that were so small they only just managed to to get past the knees, all topped of with male hair protruding from everywhere ! Some of these sites on the search page came up as CD related help forums ! In that respect it's not surprising our wives/partners give us a hard time when they can openly view stuff like that when all they're looking for is trying to make sense of us !
Sorry for the rant !
As to your question it could be like so many things to do with our CDing, do it often enough and it becomes normal ! Your partner sees in you in your undies and maybe likes it and you think I'll share that with others !
As a photographer I can understand the attraction of wanting to try and pull off the glamour aspect, I will applaud some members who pull it off very well ! I'm also grateful that the forum has guidelines and rules on this one, I probably wouldn't have stayed as a member knowing my wife might come across this site and find I'm a member of some sleaze club !
I guess what you're saying is underwear is just that, it stays hidden and private but don't feel guilty about enjoying it !
Having already posted lingerie shots before, and for that matter being a colossal fan of short skirts at any rate, I must say I for one did all of that for vanity, for the sheer sake of it, and admittedly external validation to some degree. (I have succumbed to all, sadly.)
I can appreciate the vanity aspect as outside looking in as well; there may be a part of some of us that wants to become the sexy female image in our mind's eye (I still occasionally fall into this.) If we in that demographic are turning anyone on, it's probably ourselves foremost, coupled with any emotional gratification we get in the process.
Lingerie being admittedly perceived as a feminine, "provocative and sexual" garment only visible in intimate settings might also play a role – the connotations of lingerie only add to existing tactile cues; think of the feel of lace against your skin, or the way a corset hugs your torso. Even with the entire salt shaker, the notion that cross-dressing among some of us (albeit much more on the fetishist's part for sure) is programmed towards 'contact with a female' seems to linger.
@Launa: I totally agree with you on the 'penis hanging out' photos. There doesn't seem to be much taste in those if at all. Never mind that it's used often for the sake of shock value.
Last edited by Lily Catherine; 05-03-2015 at 04:21 AM.
egregious: do you mean in a good sense or a bad sense, as it can be used to mean both?
I'll assume you mean it's shocking that crossdressing can be seen as provocative or sexual...
but only perhaps on this site would that opinion be given any credibility as the vast majority of other CDing sites are almost wholly sexual and provocative... (Yes - we do seem to occupy the high art end of this pastime here...) and by implication a lot of the CD world is.
To address your OP - you say:
Others have spotted the contradiction here before me (how I wish I stayed up late sometimes...) but I can think of something to add...Lingerie is traditionally something worn by a woman to turn on her man (and ladies, it works).
Jennifer - long hair, makeup, high heels, short skirts and dresses, jewellery are all things traditionally (recent history) worn by a woman to turn on her man - and I think your own pics present a nicely made up, long-haired femme image, with dresses showing lots of skin, jewellery and high heels...
And what do you wear under all those things traditionally worn by a woman to turn on her man...? Hmmm...???
I wouldn't want to share that aspect of me with others - so I kind of agree with you on that point - but it's a personal choice that others make... I don't believe anyone is obligated to look at anything they don't want to, and if you can't see the hypocrisy in your rather loaded question, then perhaps you need to think a little bit more about tolerance; about freedom of choice; and about the right to express oneself as an individual... particularly in the rather odd way we ALL do that here.
And as for
Remember that good ole thread "How straight..." on this forum that returned 58.5% of those who responded saying that they were gay, bi or bi-curious... doesn't score as a "vast majority" by my maths.The reason I am caused to ponder this is that the vast majority of us claim to be straight. Not "mostly" straight, just plain old straight.
Katey x
"Put some lipstick on - Perfume your neck and slip your high heels on
Rinse and curl your hair - Loosen your hips, and get a dress to wear" Stefani Germanotta
Goodness me . . . I won't even start down the silly pathway of what is traditionally worn by men and what is traditionally worn by women to attract whomever. I get your question on a theoretical level Jen . . . it is a fair question and your opinion. However, what strikes me as odd about the question is that you equate wearing some items of women's clothing and posting photos as tied to sexual orientation while other items of clothing (pictures posted) are not. Yes, we all know that many who water here may be homosexual, bisexual or as you say "just plain straight" but clothing does not define our sexual orientation. As many have pointed out, it seems ironic to ask who are you trying to attract in lingerie because women traditionally wear it to attract men when you post photos in light sundresses, nice make-up, breast forms and coiffed hair . . . things all traditionally done by women for centuries to attract men yet you don't see that tied to sexual orientation which is right because . . . it is not. Heck this is TG 101 stuff . . . gender identity however one chooses to express it is not tied to sexual orientation.
Remember, we all have our own definition of what femininity is. For some it is casual clothing and looking like the woman next door out for shopping. For others is clothes for clubbing and for others it might 50's dresses and bobby socks. Those who post pictures in lingerie are doing just that . . . posting pictures. I doubt they are going out in public in lingerie or sharing pictures with others in hopes of attracting a date and even if they did . . . that is their concept of what it means to be CD and quite honestly their choice. Does it mean they are gay, not a dude or whatever? Well, let's just say I have little doubt when many men see you out dressed "en femme Jen" I am sure they are thinking "this dude is so gay because he is wearing a dress" which is not the case . . . right? Yet it is the typical crap the Vanilla worlds heap on us (girly clothes mean gay) and one I never thought a TG/CD would ever make. . . . and that is my opinion.
Isha
Jenn, unfortunately its one of those " to each, their own" things.
We all may not enjoy seeing those pic, including myself. Actually I find myself so far from attractive wearing lingerie, that I rarely do. But its one of those things where we all fall into "different categories" for why we dress. Some of us try our hardest to be able to go out and blend with the general public and some are quite content with just staying at home in their own privacy and being comfortable with themselves.
I guess what Im saying is I side with you on this one, but we still must allow each member express how they feel.
Erica
Hi Jennifer, to answer your question...I would not lean towards posting any sort of personal lingerie pictures. I guess the only way I would do so is if it came across like some sort of high quality boudoir photo session which again was entirely PG13 AND that I managed to pull it off (the degree of which would then be in the hands of others).
The replies here have given me more perspective on this whole thing. I think some here (myself included) divorce any connection between gender presentation and sexuality. After all, they are two different things. Blatant pornographic shots along the lines of what Teresa describes (thanks for the mental image, ERASE! ERASE! ERASE!) are one thing. That is clearly sexual for those who partake in both taking such pictures and those who get a kick out of viewing such material. This is not what I'm talking about.
It comes down to how you define lingerie, as being inherently sexual. Hard to argue that but can't lingerie also help a woman feel pretty? Take a longtime married couple. She doesn't need to wear this stuff to attract him, nor to keep him as they are married. Maybe he likes it when she wears it and she wants to make him happy. But might it help her feel good about herself? I won't profess to speak for natal females in this regard but I think we have all heard that analogy at some time or other. This is kind of where I'm coming from when I approach lingerie. Take the photography out of it, there is a reason why there are countless under-thingys out there which are truly pretty. We may gravitate towards them for a lot of reasons but personally, I'll take anything that helps me to feel pretty even if no one will see what is underneath the outer shell.
Trying to bring this full circle, dialogue such as this brings out POV's that differentiate this site from something like "show-me-your-panties-and-i'll-show-you-mine.com" in that the grey area in between is where sexuality resides. Some are willing and eager to play there, others...not so much. Thing is, we are all outliers and many of us who present in the real world for whatever reason (i.e. - where we reside on a gender spectrum) want to do so without there being any sexual overtones which of course is what many/most Muggles think of when they encounter a member of our tribe. I think is where your POV is very similar to mine.
Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)
I'm jumping in the "for each his/her own boat" ...with that said...I'm not a fan of the pics either, most of them anyway...but whatever floats your boat.
I do not wear super risque lingerie. These pics are as risque as i go. WHY DO I SHARE THEM? To share my artistry, and get attention! I HAVE NO SO, OR MATE. I almost swore i would never wear panties, six years ago, only wear pantyhose , and never buy a lady bathing suit. Shortly after, i got some pantygirdles, and panties Well, a few months back, i got a one piece bathing suit, and i look fab in it. I doubt if i could get drunk enough to wear it to the beach, though. To each his own. Launa, I so agree about photos with guys letting it all hang out. It turns me off. If presenting as a woman, i never will show the male parts. Jen, here is my closest thing to not covering enough. I am single .
Last edited by Alice Torn; 05-05-2015 at 12:58 PM.
Motivation is hard to define when it comes to pictures.
Some feel it can be a validation of who they are.
Those pics are not for everyone, but remember women also have photographic shoots which can include underwear pics.
I am sure however everyone tries too look their best.
another thought - i personally never met a woman who was using her lingerie to attract me/other men, oh no indeed, they are only revealed AFTER one has "scored"!!!!
Beachwear though?!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJFyz73MRcg
I used to believe this, now I'm in the company of many tiggers. A tigger does not wonder why she is a tigger, she just is a tigger.
thanks to krististeph: tigger = TG'er .. T-I-GG-er
It's not my place to tell anyone how to express themselves or what they want to dress in.
Personally, I think there some CD's who take great shots in lingerie. For me, it comes down to presentation of it. I think smutty or perverted style presentations aren't my bag and don't belong on public sites for all to see. I feel it really reinforces the stereotype that our community are sexual deviants and perverts. But there are some that are presented very well and classy ?
Do I like dressing sexy ? Hell yeah I do ! I love being able to rock a mini dress and some stiletto heels or pair of skinny jeans and knee high boots. But I am realistic on what I can and can't pull off though.
It's all a matter of opinions and tastes. Don't like the stuff some people post ? Don't look at it I would say ?
Hey Jenn,
i agree that this genre of dress is not my cup of tea either, except for maybe totally in private, and never taking any photos (because I know I simply can't pull it off if I wanted to) , I do realize that my opinion represents either a minority or a majority of those here on this site. There are so many different aspects of behavior norms among us, it's really hard to ascertain this.
indistbutable though, is that for SOME, not all the purpose of dressing is purely sexual in nature. For some, this means sexy poses in lingerie, for some that may mean a short club dress with 4in heels, others it's a classic suit and skirt outfit.
for some, it the goal of trying to just present as an everyday woman. I think since you may fall in this range , you don't understand the motivation for the lingerie photos. Heck some GG would go to Glamour Shots to take a boudoir photo and hang it their bedroom for either themselves or the SO. Some consider that aspect very private.
i guess it just matters who you talk to (CD, TS, TG, GG) all included.
I think this is the best answer, I am sure a lot of us try various things that we probably have no business trying in the first place but the curiosity through the years, the wondering what it feels like and such, we just go for it to see if we can do it or not and who are you going to share it with other than other sister's?
I personally have never done Lingerie,or bikini's, really haven't had any desire to but that doesn't mean if the right outfit came along I wouldn't. Whether I would share the results or not, that's a different story
Flip Flops were made for Beaches & Bath Houses, We have neither in 2017. Lose the flip flops!
Maybe you should ask why a CD would post any pictures at all. I hate to say it but 99% of the pics I see are a man in a dress. The other 1% had to be gleaned out of probably dozens. I haven't posted pics in a very long time because of that reason. But I don't really dress to "pass," I do it because of how it makes me feel. I really don't care what others think about how I look so I don't seek their approval. I stopped taking pictures of myself years ago.
Last edited by LilSissyStevie; 05-03-2015 at 11:26 AM.
Some time ago before I found this site I made a search for local contact with fellow crossdressers and found only sites offering only sex with other "CDs". It really turned me off and I began to think that my kind of crossdressing was limited to just me. Then I found this site and found that there were more CDs who agreed with me than disagree.
I am not saying that any of us are in complete agreement but on this site there is a certain feeling of propriety. and I have never seen any photos that exposed in any form the masculine parts between the legs. Thank you, whoever is responsible.
Rhanda
Stevie, probably just to have some fun while they are dressed. I like to share pictures myself. I do it for something to do while dressed seeing that I don't go pass the front door all that often. When I do I do more pictures lol I don't do them, or share them, for anyone's "approval" but feedback on whether I am improving my style and look is always nice.
That's also another reason I do the pictures. If I look at the ones that I took when I first started REALLY dressing and compare them to the ones I take today, there is vast improvement there.
We have a lot of pretty sisters here that pull off the look very well so I don't think that 99% is very accurate.
Last edited by ~Joanne~; 05-03-2015 at 11:29 AM.
Flip Flops were made for Beaches & Bath Houses, We have neither in 2017. Lose the flip flops!
Jennifer, it is inevitable, if a question is posted there is slop over to other issues. Firstly, you only asked why photos are posted on this site? (Some member choose to share photos..) Since I have not posted any photos, let alone photos in lingerie, I cannot answer your question. Maybe some of the commenters who have posted lingerie photos can answer.
I enjoy seeing photos of members attired in "street wear" or "formal wear." In the real world when observing women I find a woman smartly attired in a dress, skirt & blouse, jeans & top attractive, and, thus desirable. The problem with the cheesecake pictures on this site? I know the wearer is a guy. If the purpose of lingerie is too "turn a guy on," the effort is wasted. If the purpose of posting is to make the wearer feel great or womanly, then OK. The visual is a little too much for me.
My personal opinion for myself is I don't possess the attributes to don such skimpy lingerie. When my wife and I were younger we enjoyed shopping for lingerie for her. We spent many Saturdays in midtown Manhattan checking out the floor length or tea length nightgowns or colorful slips in Macy's and Gimbel's and Bloomingdale's and all the stores between. At that time she had the figure that did not need to be concealed from her husband. Sometimes women wear certain garments because they are self conscious of a minor "defect," even though her lover could not care less. My memory has not diminished to the extent I have forgotten those trips. Doctors say when we get old and feeble our short term memory goes first, and, the long term memory remains. I'm all set for the nursing home.
As to my personal preference.... I love a woman in a floor length nightgown. There is mystery. There is the idea of "unwrapping" a present. Then, there is Elizabeth Taylor in "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." How can any man not like her in that slip? Check out the ads from that time period for day wear. Slips too were marketed with the same idea as bedroom attire. It may be a generational thing. Maybe us "old guys" see visual sexual stimulation in a different light.
Me? I have several floor length nightgowns. I love wearing them in the privacy of my home. I can say the same for many of my lovely slips.
So, if members want to post lingerie pictures, that's OK. I'm only interested in lingerie pictures of my wife.
Maybe I have a more discerning eye than most. I don't mean that they necessarily look bad just that they don't quite pass. My point was that Jennifer wonders why someone who didn't pass 100% would post pics wearing lingerie so why doesn't she ask why CDs would post pics at all? It's not a question I would ask.
Who says some one that was born "male" can not look good in lingerie?
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Little Miss. Reason
Just everyday... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYhlRYKMfAc
A Journey 2011-2014 https://www.youtube.com/watch?lv=Ikji9DMaeVA
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I agree with those who say that they would include dressing in sexy lingerie as part of the overall crossdressing experience. That includes items typically associated with what society has decided lies strictly within the feminine domain and comprises such things as high heels, sexy boots, skinny jeans, pantyhose, tights, leggings, all manner of traditionally female underwear and shape wear, not to mention evening gowns, prom dresses, and bridal dresses etc. I have purchased and worn all of the above as well to partake of this, and feel no shame over it.
That said, I have "0" desire to take pictures of myself wearing some of my more provocative or sexy items, never mind actually posting them for someone else's "viewing pleasure" (a big "yuck!" for all concerned, IMHO
Personally, I don't have a body that I would inflict on anyone with me wearing sexy lingerie. What's the old joke: "I practice birth control by taking my clothes off." (lol) However, for sleeping, I find the feel of silky, sexy and cute baby doll lingerie quite pleasant. In my dreams I can be very tantalizing.
Candice...top marks for the best response so far. Jennifer, we usually agree on so much, but I think you're missing the point a little bit. I'm one of those girls who is largely in the closet...and probably going to stay that way for the most part. Consequently, photography for me is a form of expression and a way of seeking confirmation that I'm coming close to creating the illusion that we all strive for. Like many of us here, my earliest transgender experiences revolved around lingerie. So there will always be a soft spot in my heart to wear pretty, frilly things. And I do like to pose for the camera while doing this. But let's be clear...I'm not striving for smut. The last thing I would do is post photos that are clearly anything but tasteful. And nor do I want to view any photos that are less than tasteful. However, where I post (flickr), there are so many talented gurls posting very high quality, artistic photos of themselves in lingerie. I'm not ashamed to admit that I enjoy these photos...I enjoy the tasteful illusion and particularly those that reflect vintage or pinup looks.
More importantly, I know that I'm far from alone. Last September, I started a thread here titled "The Pinup Lingerie Challenge". Since that time, the thread has been viewed 16,627 times, with 248 responses (many of which contain photos from girls responding to the challenge). I don't know for sure, but I hazard a guess that this is one of the most popular threads in the history of this site. See it here: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...erie+challenge
I rest my case. Actually, not quite: I should include a photo while I'm at it. ;-)
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LOL, Really Jennifer, just own it, you comment on what the girls wear and how they present all the time. I’m bi, gay, whatever. I post pics for lots of reasons. Mostly just to show I was somewhere and how I looked for others to see for what ever their reason is for looking. I have sent some of the same pictures to my boyfriend (who is not on this site) that you would see as tame like last night with the beer girls, He is turned on by it. Of course he knows me, he’s my boyfriend get it. I have posted pics in a bikini, why to show I can. Again my boyfriend thinks they’re hot and a new friend from here that is in the closet had technical questions which I answered in a pm. Oh and I was at the beach yesterday in a new bikini working on my tan. There will be no pics, I got sand in my last camera and will not take my new camera on the beach. As I have said I go out a lot. Do people think I am a women, no they think I’m TS and gay, and I am fine with that. I have a good time.
Candice and Isablella nice pics
Just being Jean and loving it
I agree.
I will just just add that lingerie is the most intimate and feminine of all female garments so, is it that strange that some wish to express and exposes their most feminine and yes, sexy female side?.
GGs come is all types and desires so, why would anyone expect all CDs to fit one narrow mold?
BTW, what business is anyone's sexual preferences here?
Last edited by Barbara Jo; 05-03-2015 at 02:06 PM.
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