We need to get to a stage were it is as normal for a man to wear a skirt as a woman to wear trousers and trans labels inhibit at least this cross-dresser - I think it helps everyone if society accepts that changing your clothes does not lead to any association that you are changing your gender.
Exactly, but we can only manage this together, and this is the great WHY, why we need to define the term Transgender as it is, and not as what people thinks of it because of the media.

We are the ones that can explain well what Transgender means, and it is our responsability to do so.

I crossdress totally: wig, makeup, except breast forms, and while I attempt to look like a woman because I am in deep love with that look (for whatever reason that might be), I am not changing gender when I do this. And I, like you, do not want to be perceived as I am changing genders.

I'm male, no matter how I look, that is the hardwired identity of mind (soul, or whatever). And I'm Transgender, because I'm out of the societal expectations for gender.

As I see it, Transgender is the term for an era. In the future, when we have already won all our rights and defined how things are, the term will be rarely used I believe, because you'll just be a woman, man or whatever your identity is, and nothing else will have to be explained, as nothing else will be questioned.

But right now, Transgender covers us all, and is the flag we can carry with pride towards our victory, together. You can stand by it, or not, that is ultimately, your decision.