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Thread: What does "gurl" mean to you?

  1. #1
    A gentle searcher. Chriscrossed's Avatar
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    What does "gurl" mean to you?

    What connotations does "gurl" have to you here in our crossdressing circles? I've run into the term here a few times and I'm quite fond of it. Please give some context why you feel that way if you choose to reply.

    Chris Crossed:
    I feel entitled to think of myself a "gurl" when I talk girl-talk with my friend. I love participating in girly interactions with her, however I feel it's important and fair to her that I make a little qualification by replacing just the i in g(i)rl with a u. I do it because there is an element of pretending; I'm trying on my girly persona in a playful way. When I talk girl-talk I want to defer to and give respect to my friends qualifications and experience at being a Girl-Girl.
    Last edited by Chriscrossed; 10-30-2015 at 03:48 AM. Reason: clarity and grammar

  2. #2
    formerly: aBoyNamedSue IamWren's Avatar
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    I've seen on the forum where some of the members are offended by the term.
    I don't mind it at all and kind of like it for the very reason you described in your second paragraph.

    I have spelled it 'girl' here on the forum though so as not to offend the trans women. And I have read posts where many of the gals have said about themselves "while en femme i AM a woman" so out of courtesy spelled it 'girl' since this is a CD forum. But I've often wondered if that is gender dysphoria showing up, what dual personality disorder looks like or like a really headstrong actor staying in character to the Nth level.
    I am not a woman nor am I a man... I am an enby. Hi, I am Wren.

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    If we are talking about the word itself, then personally, I don’t like the word gurl. To me, the visuals of a word can sometimes be as important as the sound. I like the way my name Cheryl looks and it jars when I see it spelled Sheryl.

    When I was learning to read, I remember seeing the word girl and it evoking thoughts and images of the attractive girls in my class. So to me, words like girl, woman and feminine conjure up images of female-ness that I like.

    When I see the word gurl it almost appears as gurgle which isn’t nice at all. I don’t like to think we might start using the word wumman, either.

    I do take your point though about wanting to differentiate ourselves from real women as we are ultimately pretending to be women (or should that be wimmin?). However, I don’t see it quite as simple as that as there are a huge number of psychological issues surrounding our ‘pretence’. A lot of us want to align ourselves as close to women as possible even if it’s only temporary. And I would wager a bet that a lot of us would transition if it were a lot quicker, simpler and with guaranteed results.

  4. #4
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    I have used both "gurl" or "gyrl" to differentiate between genetic women and CD's in the same sentence/paragraph. It helps to keep everything straight (no pun intended)

  5. #5
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    I like girl. It makes me feel more fem when I read and or type even when I have to to wear Don's cloths. Gurl is odd to me maybe because it is so
    close to halloween.

  6. #6
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    It really means nothing to me. I see it used here sometimes to differentiate between a crossdresser and an actual female. At my age, I am neither a girl or a gurl. Or a boy.

  7. #7
    Silver Member I Am Paula's Avatar
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    Gurl is a term that doesn't need to be. It's almost exclusively used within the community itself, where nobody is embarrassed by calling themselves GIRL. It's like you are ashamed of something, or somehow you are less of something. If you are a crossdresser in the classic sense, you are male 'Boy', until you dress, then you are female 'Girl'. Why confuse it further.
    If you are gender fluid/neautral you probably think gurl is too feminine anyway.
    If you are MtF you are Girl.

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member AnnieMac's Avatar
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    I don't like the term "gurl" either. It shouts to the world that you are a self-delusional cross dresser.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Ceera's Avatar
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    I'm gender fluid, and feel that I have both male and female mental aspects, regardless of being born with a male body. So I prefer to just use girl when referring to myself as Ceera. When I am in female mode, I am doing my best to 'be a girl', and to behave like a real genetic girl would. I am expressing the girl that I feel is within me, and not 'pretending' to be a girl.

    If others prefer to use gurl when writing about themselves or me, I'll respect their choice.

    If I don't know someone else's preference, anyone presenting as a female will be referred to as a female by me, so I'd write girl and not gurl when referring to them.

  10. #10
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Gurl means little to me as I grew up in another era.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  11. #11
    Gold Member Jaylyn's Avatar
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    I've never been accused of being politically correct. I care less which word we use. I think I am a CD. I enjoy just being that. I'm pretending to look like a GG and thus if someone wants to call me a girl, gurl, or a CD doesn't bother me. I can see if a male is transitioning into a GG that they want to be called a Girl. They might be offended even if they were called a CD when they transition. Some don't want to be called a CD as that term has some negative connotations about it. Many associate that with a older gentleman that is preverted and hides behind ladies clothing. I think of it as I'm just a normal GM that enjoys wearing smooth, silky, and pretty sexy clothing that give me good feelings. I feel it doesn't make any difference what they call me just as long as they call me in time for supper or as some call dinner.

  12. #12
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    I put "gurl" in that little search engine box and it showed there has been 419 +/- times "gurl" has been used. The urban dictionary states it is a term usually used by adolescent girls under the age of 14. I guess maybe those who consistently use the term "gurl" should weigh into this thread. I usually don't get offended by much these days. Political correctness is not one of my best traits. I can understand why a woman transitioning to her true self would be offended. Without regard to her birth gender she is a female. Even my wife will sometimes nudge me with an elbow if I refer to a female as a "girl" if she is of age that I should call her a "woman." I refer to my 15 year old granddaughter as a young woman because she is of child bearing age.

    I really do not think "gurl" or some other similar spelling reflects how I feel about myself. I've never thought of my cross dressing as a 'playful' activity. Over the years it had caused serious issues of sexual identity thanks to how society views cross dressers. I realize any genetic woman looking at me in a dress or even looking at the discourse of this site will be shaking her head. For whatever reason I like to wear women's clothing I know I am not a female by birth and, at most I am trying to emulate a woman. That is not a playful act for me. It is not dressing up in some weird Halloween outfit with a beard and hairy legs and spoofing women. For me cross dressing is "serious stuff."

    At my age I prefer the term woman, even mature woman. But, if you use the term "gurl" I'm not offended.

  13. #13
    A gentle searcher. Chriscrossed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Linda E. Woodworth View Post
    I have used both "gurl" or "gyrl" to differentiate between genetic women and CD's in the same sentence/paragraph. It helps to keep everything straight (no pun intended)
    "Gyrl" has a nicer look to it than gurl. It also appeals to me because it is a mashup of guy&girl letters.

    I also like the way you use it for practical reasons. (In sweden they added “Hen” (he/she) to “han” (he) and “hon” (she) in the 2015 edition of the Swedish Academy’s dictionary. The pronoun hen is used to refer to a person without revealing their gender – either because it is unknown, because the person is transgender, or the speaker or writer deems the gender to be superfluous information.)
    Last edited by Chriscrossed; 10-29-2015 at 10:18 AM.

  14. #14
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Hardly ever use the term myself, If anything I refer to myself as a woman when en femme. Otherwise I normally just use my name and call everyone else by name.If I'm referring to someone I normally use the word gal.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  15. #15
    A gentle searcher. Chriscrossed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by I Am Paula View Post
    Gurl is a term that doesn't need to be. It's almost exclusively used within the community itself, where nobody is embarrassed by calling themselves GIRL. It's like you are ashamed of something, or somehow you are less of something. If you are a crossdresser in the classic sense, you are male 'Boy', until you dress, then you are female 'Girl'. Why confuse it further.
    If you are gender fluid/neautral you probably think gurl is too feminine anyway.
    If you are MtF you are Girl.
    The notion of a crossdresser in the classic sense is compelling to me because it implies that there are non-classic crossdressers (or contemporary crossdressers) and I'm talking about identity here not fashion. These day's I've heard from a spectrum of crossdressers asking "who am I?". I don't think we need to quatify and define every colour mixture and tone in our rainbow, but I'm curious to name the primary colours so that we can talk to one another, about one another, understand and support one another.

    It makes me try to recall how that Coke and Coke-Classic story panned out ages ago ... there were such strong feelings. And who here is a Cherry Coke?
    Last edited by Chriscrossed; 10-29-2015 at 12:35 PM.

  16. #16
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    why would you want to add another stamp to your life? Why do you think Gurl or Gyrl is important? Why not just stick with "man"? I think it's silly and I am glad no one uses it on me.
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  17. #17
    GG ReineD's Avatar
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    I dislike the term. Years ago, someone explained the misspelling was a visual way to indicate the difference between someone who enjoys presenting as a "gurl" and someone who identifies as a "girl" (genetic women or MtF TSs).

    I just don't understand why people who are not genetic females or MtF TSs, wouldn't want to refer to themselves as who they are. If they don't identify fully as female, then why don't they refer to themselves as who they are namely crossdressers or gender fluid people. To me, people who use the term "gurl" enjoy the fantasy of being female more than actually wanting to take the active steps to be one. And by using the term, they are asking others to participate in their fantasy. This may all be well and good in a crossdresser forum among others who delight in the fantasy, but not anywhere else, for example to a wife or friends not associated here.
    Reine

  18. #18
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I'm not a girl, gurl, or gyrl. Nor will I ever be! I'm just a guy in a dress.

    However, Sherry tries to appear to be a female, girl, or woman. She doesn't wish to taken for a gull, ghoul, (except on Halloween), gargoyle, or gurl/gyrl.

    However, if u wish to present yourself as one of those things? Go for it!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  19. #19
    Gold Member Helen_Highwater's Avatar
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    I must admit to being one of those who uses the term but as a collective noun. Having said that I'm just as likely to use "folks".

    Let's not loose sight of the fact that we're exchanging views via a forum expressly devoted to our "situation". This isn't a subsection of Mumsnet. By the act of being here we differentiate ourselves. There are GG's who do occupy this site with us and as far as I can see no-one has commented on the fact that as a group they've been given their own collective noun. Yet they in truth have the greatest claim to be referred to simply as Women.

    I totally understand that when dressed someone becomes, feels, acts womanly, presenting to the world as that gender. It's absolutely core to how so many of us feel. However to me it feels somehow false to refer to the collective as the women, I can go with ladies as that is more a term of endearment. For me gurls is just an umbrella term that applies to all who were not born a genetic female who have joined together here. After all, a rose by any other name........
    Who dares wears Get in, get out without being noticed

  20. #20
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    It means one of us to me.

  21. #21
    A gentle searcher. Chriscrossed's Avatar
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    Maybe these are best kept for fun words, light terms of endearment and banished from any serious girl talk.

  22. #22
    Call me Pam pamela7's Avatar
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    i like "gurl", and it works for me from a CD perspective, understand it might not be PC, don't really care tho, feels more right somehow.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJFyz73MRcg
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  23. #23
    Isn't Life Grand? AllieSF's Avatar
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    I do not really care for "gurl", "gurlz" and other silly alternate spellings for commonly used words. I sometimes do not like "girly" either because it sounds so simplistic and is a word I hardly ever hear from a GG's mouth, young or older. I do see it used sometimes in fashion magazines and from what I can tell, it is just looking cuter and younger than one normally looks, or to dress up more then their every day plain clothes. All that being said I can live with it because I can also ignore it most of the time.

  24. #24
    Platinum Member Eryn's Avatar
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    To me it means the writer can't spell.
    Eryn
    "These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    "What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
    "She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
    "Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]

  25. #25
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    While I don't use gurl, I don't mind it and I kind of like the guy/girl mix. Although I see how the word can lock people into a group/identity which is not them. I identify as male. I like to think of myself as a beautiful man.

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