I don't have a female identity either. In fact I don't navel gaze too much about my identity at all. All identities are probably delusional. It's much more interesting to know how others see me. Stevie is my birth name but I admit I'm not that little nor does anyone describe me as a sissy. For me, it's all just a dumb fetish that I neither asked for nor understood until late in life. Up until then I would periodically get OCD about whether I was gay or trans. But now I see it all as a coping mechanism for anxiety/ trauma surrounding my relationship to masculinity. Nothing more to it than that. A little weird but harmless.
