The first venue I went to publicly while cross dressed, back in 2014, was an LGBTQ nightclub, on their Saturday drag show nights. I figured, and I was right, that anyone at a club that was hosting a drag show that night should be cool with one more ‘man dressed as a woman’, in the audience. It was a great first experience for being out and being seen. The drag performers were gracious and welcoming, and the patrons all treated me well. As it happened, there were five or more other CD/Transgender regulars there, who also usually showed up on drag show nights.
I transitioned to full time female in 2018. And I pass pretty well now for a cisgender woman. As far as women complementing me goes, it depends a lot on how they say it.
If they clearly had no trouble spotting that I am transgender, I feel a bit disappointed that my presentation was lacking. But at the same time, sincere complements, such as, “You have nicer legs than I have!”, are pretty uplifting anyway. On the other hand, a backhanded complement like, “You wear that dress pretty well, for a guy,” can feel downright insulting.
But cisgender women complement each other a lot. Comments like, “Oh! I love your shoes! Where did you get them?”, or, “Your nails look really great!”, or, “I gotta say, that outfit looks great on you!” Are often quite sincere, and by no means an indication that they clocked you. I love interactions like that. They feel like a strong validation of my femininity.
