Originally Posted by
XDW Nathan-Natasha
Hey again girls.
I've been taking some heat in personal messages from several members of this forum who shall remain unidentified, obviously, because they're just concerned.
Because of the messages I've gotten and some of the reactions I've recieved I feel like I need to clear some things up.
Again, much of what I'm about to say is regarding stuff I've recieved in personal messages, so it may not make a bunch of sense in the context of the generally positive replies I've gotten here, so here goes:
(WARNING! - I'm sorry if these seem like brutal rants...it's not for you girls and genetic girls out there in general - it's for those who seem to have misunderstood what I said here when I started this thread and called me on it, and to prevent such from happening in the future.
Again ladies and genetic ladies, I apologize. This is just my way of clearing some stuff up...and venting, I guess. For those of you who have been nothing but supportive - thank you.
For those of you who have become concerned about my prior post - thank you all the same. I undersand that you're concerned about me and my fiance, but please - don't make crass judgments without really knowing me, kay? Again, I understand that you're concerned, and I thank you.
END WARNING!)
Damage Control:
-I know I am not a transexual. Am I transgendered? Probably. Gender dysphoric? Maybe. Do I really know? Nope. I'm me, and that's it.
I primarily identify with myself as a man and I know I will always be a man first and foremost. I do not want to change that.
-I, however, have some strong feminine feelings and, I guess you could say 'desires' that I don't quite understand right now.
This feeling of wanting to be, as I said: "loved by a woman as a woman" is one of them and is something I'm trying to figure out.
-I'd be lying if I said that there WASN'T a part of me that identifies at least in part to women and as a woman, but that doesn't make me a woman or want to become a woman. I'm who God made me and all this confusion is, I guess, part of the package - either what He created directly or what He just plain allowed to happen.
-I have not left my fiance out in the dark about this. She knows what I'm feeling. I told her about this somewhat a while ago - I'm only starting to be able to put it in words now, though and that's what this was an attempt to do.
-I'm not really a lesbian, I guess. I'm a straight male. If I did consider myself a woman when I am cross-dressed then sure, I'd probably be a lesbian.
-Ummmm...that's all I can think about now.
I hope this clears some stuff up for those of you who have been a lil' confused over my prior post. Please, if you have any specific concerns, feel free to post 'em and I'll answer you, or drop me a personal message. I'm more than willing to address any issues, concerns, etc. in private or right here - in the public eye.
Take care ladies! If I need to do more damage control later, I'll do so. But right now, I want to do other stuff! Cheers!