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Thread: What would you say?

  1. #1
    eluuzion eluuzion's Avatar
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    What would you say?

    This question is directed at CDs that are totally "in the closet", and are confident that their SOs are totally unaware of their CD activities.

    Here is the hypothetical (I hope) scenario...

    You and your SO are getting into bed as usual. Just as you reach over to turn off the light, your SO says...

    "Just a second, I need to ask you a question, and I need a 'yes or no' answer...Are you a crossdresser?"

    What would your answer be? (yes or no)
    ("It depends" and other "cop outs" are not allowed, lol)
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  2. #2
    Aspiring Member Nicola2876's Avatar
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    I would say yes I think/hope. I would have to explain everything though and that would take hours. To be honest it would be a relief as I've just been diagnosed with gender dysphoria and it's only a matter of time until I have that conversation. Such a life changing topic for bedtime!

  3. #3
    Silver Member prene's Avatar
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    I'm no Tiger Woods.

    No SO therefore I guess this does not apply.

    IF it did

    I would say yes.
    Otherwise,
    She would think "who owns all these panties/bras and stuff."
    She would think "I was having multiple affairs (different size bras)."

    I'm no Tiger Woods.

  4. #4
    New Member
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    I'd say yes.

    I have dropped a few hints to her so i wouldn't be totally suprised if she asked me.

  5. #5
    Silver Member AKAMichelle's Avatar
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    I would have lied years ago. In fact it took me about 1.5 years for me to tell my wife that I was a cd'er. In fact I was trying to tell my wife and was driving in the country late at night when a cop pulled me over for speeding on my birthday. I didn't get the ticket because of my birthday, but that ending telling her then.
    Michelle

  6. #6
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Interesting all who said "Yes" when the question was
    This question is directed at CDs that are totally "in the closet", and are confident that their SOs are totally unaware of their CD activities.
    . To me it reads that you are willing to own up to it IF you get caught. Now having read many posts here either we have a small sample and the totally in the closet people haven't answered because we KNOW that the majority will make up some answer or they secretly want to be outed. OR there is still the real world vs. the cyber world
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
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    “Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,

  7. #7
    Member Mackenzie's Avatar
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    My answer would have to be "Yes". I must be honest. My wife is my very best friend and I would not lie to her, even if she asked me a hard question.

    Mackenzie

  8. #8
    Just a touch of class Lynn Marie's Avatar
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    [SIZE="3"]Yup! My LF doesn't know, but given a lead-in like that, I'd be glad to tell her. We don't live together so I still have plenty of freedom. My only reason for not telling her is I just don't want to hurt her or dash her love and feelings for me. She's pretty special.[/SIZE]

  9. #9
    Senior Member Ruth's Avatar
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    I'm out to my wife so I can't answer properly but the question gave me one of those 'if only' moments. Yes, if at any time the question had been asked, I would have said yes. As it happens, I volunteered the information myself some years ago.
    I think in retrospect it was fairly brave but I'm so glad I did.
    [SIZE="2"]Always be true to yourself because the people who matter don’t mind, and the people who mind don’t matter.[/SIZE]

  10. #10
    Girly girl? erika130's Avatar
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    I'm not in a relationship, no SO, so I probably shouldn't even be answering this, but if I was, despite the consequences etc, I can't even imagine just lying flat out like that to your SO given the question, so I'd say Yes.

  11. #11
    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
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    A strange but interesting question, given the conditions. It's unlikely that the question would be asked just out of the blue. So there must have been some clue to crossdressing activities or desires. You can be confident, but not certain, that the SO doesn't know. So I think that since the question was indeed asked, it was not out of the blue, and it's best to answer honestly. Consider yourself busted, but don't get too defensive about it.

  12. #12
    Member Michaela42's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erika130 View Post
    I'm not in a relationship, no SO, so I probably shouldn't even be answering this, but if I was, despite the consequences etc, I can't even imagine just lying flat out like that to your SO given the question, so I'd say Yes.
    Same here. Why lie?

  13. #13
    Member Lover girl's Avatar
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    Post

    I Have never had an S.O. in my life. I'm a very honest person and if I had a S.O. It's possible that I may not have been a CD. The CD part of me attempts to fill in a part of my life that I can't have. I guess that do to my honesty and I would have had a S.O. and also CD'ed. I would have to say yes. Then as my luck would have it, I would be alone again!!! For me honesty has not served well but it's just the way I am!!!!
    The lonely flower in the desert wearing HEELS

  14. #14
    Cat's Eye Siren ArleneRaquel's Avatar
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    I would have to say yes and hope that she is accepting.
    Fulfilling a Lifetime Dream of Living as a Woman in My Adult Years. Ten Years Living 24/7 as a Mature Lady

    My Love of Cat's Eye Frames, Bangles, Red Lipstick, Nails, & Cheeks, Comes From My Mother - An Irish Beauty

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  15. #15
    Girl underconstruction Paulette's Avatar
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    I would ask why the strange question, there is a very good reason that some of us are in the closet with our wives and her being an understanding woman is not one of them.

    Because of work I live a great deal of the time away from home and dressed. I would love for her to know and accept or at least know and not judge but that is not going to happen based on the comments she makes when the subject comes up about transsexuals or cross-dressing. I have hinted about getting my ears pierced and she has taken about and hour to come off the roof. I recently did get them pierced and attempted to remove and then re-insert the post after a few hours to hid the piercing but it did not work. Next time and there will be a next time I get them pierced I will have a few weeks away form her and the family (adult girls very observant) to let them heal enough for retainers.

    Now she might have a clue since I am smooth from nose to toes with only a landing strip, and I get waxed every 6 weeks but so far not a word.

  16. #16
    Member Dee2U's Avatar
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    I would like to say that if asked in that way I would hope to answer yes but it depends on the tone. It is one thing to be obtuse or secretive. Quite another to lie outright - especially if asked in a neutral or friendly way. I might lie or might not. The last time my SO came back from out of town I lied when she asked if I wore her panties; she asked with such a negative tone that I lied. I am not proud of myself to answer in this way. In fact it reflects how unhappy with myself for not having the courage to come out and take the consequences. It is, however, the sad truth and that is why I am in the forum for; to build up the strength to be real and be me...Dee

  17. #17
    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
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    Yes or No, are you a crossdresser?

    History tells us it may be best to answer this way: "It depends on what the definition of 'are' are."

  18. #18
    Senior Member Jenny Doolittle's Avatar
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    A resounding "YES"

  19. #19
    New Member
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    I would be quiet for a long time wondering what prompted the question hoping for some indication from her that it was ok! If I just blurted out 'yes' I fear that would be the end - don't we all. To answer 'no', I dont think I'd be too convincing.

    Dawn x

  20. #20
    "Grandma Susan" SusanLCD's Avatar
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    Sadly, I would say No

    It would be a lie; the same lie I have kept for decades. (After keeping the lie for so long, why would I suddenly change.) I believe it's the only serious lie that I have. But, it's a BIG one, isn't it?

    I'm as confident as anyone can be that my SO doesn't know. (Never 100%) But, I'm also confident that she would not handle it well. And, I'm equally confident that she would throw it back at me when stressed.

    Going back to your question, if she was asking because of something external (a movie; a friend being outted; a book/story; etc.), I would "laugh it off" and hope the subject would die. If, on the other hand, she was pressing me on it such that I realized that she knew something, I would look for an opportunity in the discussion to come clean on it. I think all of us want to be open and out and would be relieved were it so.
    Susan

    "Not sure who I am, yet. But, I'll let you know..."

  21. #21
    New Member daddyo1969's Avatar
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    If you want me to be I will..

  22. #22
    eluuzion eluuzion's Avatar
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    hehehee, interesting replies.

    this was also a way for all of us to realize just how many thoughts we humans are capable of generating and processing in our minds in a period of about 5 seconds or less, eh? Pretty amazing.

    Don't forget that crying is always an effective way to buy yourself some thinking time...women are experts at it...lol

    The only requirement was a yes or no answer. You can still fake a heart attack, sneeze, pee in the bed, and other mature tactics...

    Her expression when asking would also be a big factor. Same with vocal presentation.
    If she was giggling or dead serious. If she had the tone of a interogation cop, or sounded like she was kidding. Or pointing a guy at you...that would probably have some influence...Or if she was wearing one of the bras you thought you had hidden so well....hehehe
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  23. #23
    Girl in disguise Emily Ann Brown's Avatar
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    This is scared...I have been there! NOT JOKE...ask the old girls who remember me.

    The answer was I am transgender...

    I am divorce now....and broke WINK.


    The truth will set you free!


    Em
    Living with a heel in each world.

  24. #24
    Breakin' social taboos TGMarla's Avatar
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    Yes.

    Any money found in the laundry is MINE!


    "This is no social crisis....this is me having fun!"

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  25. #25
    Member Tess's Avatar
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    I would lie like a rug.

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