Gave my hairdresser the boot

[Michelia]

Back when I got my wig a few years back, I soon realized I needed to grow out my hair, because I sweat copiously under a wig. So I asked the wig lady if she knew someone that I could go to help me keep my hair cut and advise me on how to let it grow and style it so I could use it both en femme and for work.

She knew this gay guy that was also a drag queen. So I went to him. He is a great hairdresser, but works in this fancy large salon, and is very careful not to offend anyone. I do not blame him for this attitude. But I think he never understood me. Never could figure out that I was not gay. He isolated me and always gave me appointments when others were not there. He must have been afraid I was going to show up en femme one day.

One day I was working and I walked past a small salon where only the owner and another lady worked, accompanied by a manicurist. I went in and met them. I liked them enough. A few weeks later I called and made an appointment. I showed up in feminine clothes but discreetly so. They were so nice to me and there were four customers all ladies in the small shop. They all made me feel like I was one of the girls. I was so comfortable I just came out and told them I crossdressed. They got a kick out of it.

Now they told me whenever I want to go en femme it is OK. Anytime. Anyday. No matter who the other customers are. They made it plainly clear I am just as good as any other one of their customers. And believe me, they do not need any more business. All this great experience and good haircut for half the price! I cannot believe I went to this other guy for all that time!

[Lisa Golightly]

A good hairdresser is worth her weight in gold... Mine is called Julie and she's been doing my hair for... ooooooo... must be five years now. She's done a brilliant job with my hair. From being dry, brittle and riddled with split ends to long and glossy. Can't thank her enough. She's great to talk to as well... A really wonderful woman. :)

I hope your new hairdresser proves to be great for you as mine is for me. :)

[Leanne2]

When you find a great hairdresser be sure to be quite generous when you tip her. Just imagine that if you don't tip enough then she'll be too busy some day and turn you down. These people work long hours while standing. Try to stand up for 6 hours some day. And the blow dryers are hard on their wrists. I'm so lucky to have Amanda as a friend as well as my hairdresser. Leanne

[JoAnne Wheeler]

What a wonderful; post Michelia - I am so impressed with your courage and determination - you are very inspirational to us all

JoAnne Wheeler

[beenherelongtime]

again a case of people treating us a just another person.

[Patti Remick]

I showed up in feminine clothes but discreetly so. They were so nice to me and there were four customers all ladies in the small shop. They all made me feel like I was one of the girls. I was so comfortable I just came out and told them I crossdressed. They got a kick out of it.

Now they told me whenever I want to go en femme it is OK. Anytime. Anyday. No matter who the other customers are. They made it plainly clear I am just as good as any other one of their customers. And believe me, they do not need any more business. All this great experience and good haircut for half the price! I cannot believe I went to this other guy for all that time!

Im so happy for you and that you found such a wonderful place. I know you said they were accepting and so were the other customers at the time, but you were not fully enfemme. Id just ask if you can let us know what happens when you go back fully enfemme, if the other customers are still so accepting.

Best of luck

Love and Hugs,
Patti Remick

[Lesley Ann]

I have just read your thread Michelia, and would you believe I have an appointment with my hairdresser to-morrow morning where I will have a full perm (three and half hours!) The hairdressing salon is local to where I live, and the stylist who looks after me, styled my late wife's hair and also my daughters when they lived at home. So get on extremely well with her, we have a gossip, talk about our families, I guess all the usual chat women have whilst in the hairdressers. Two cups of coffee, read my newspaper and they have an area outback where you can smoke!

I don't think I would have liked your 'gay' salon as you describe it, and I am glad that you have found a more welcoming hairdresser, enjoy it and have a wonderful time, I am looking forward to tomorrow.:)
My best regards,
Lesley Ann.

[JoannaCaroline]

I love my hairdresser. My problem is that we move too often to keep one. At home (the place I will eventually return) "J" will take care of me in any gender. I haven't lived there in 3 years and I had short hair then. My hair has grown out for the past 14 months. The funny part is now my wife goes with me to the salon, because she knows I won't be specific enough about what I want. She gives directions on color and cut.

The bottom line is go to someone you're comfortable with and is comfortable with you. You're paying the money. You may as well give it to someone who you're comfortable with and hopefully you are or could be friends with

[Ashlie Marie]

ok so props to all your stylists becuase gurls you all look great.. :-) ?i know that 5 years ago when I decdied that after 18 years of no hair I just decided one day poof I wanted hair lol so I started growing it out and if it wasnt for Cindy my stylist (my nail tech too) I would have cut it off a long time ago but I got past that stupid at the neck phase and now my hair is naturally curlly and I love heary all the GG's come up to ne in the mall and stores telling me how jealious they of me for my hair hehe..

its good to be a gurl

[amy2310]

My parents, Nigella and Sandra, have a wonderful hair dresser, she's very relaxed and is quite happy to have a laugh and a joke. Even the younger stylists who work with her are genuinly nice and talkative. When I visit mum and dad, I book have my hair done up there.... She's also reasonably priced, which is great for me :)

[Chari]

Your post is an insiration to all of us, to find a hair stylist who we are comfortable with, that listens, advises, and is comfortable with who we are! I looked for many months to find a stylist with those qualities, and finally found one that is accepting of me and my life style. At first she was cautious as to what I had envisioned for my hair style, but together we discussed cuts, perms, and colors. I love having this wonderful hairstylist, and now friend, who makes me look more "femme!

[Michelia]

A good hairdresser is worth her weight in gold... Mine is called Julie and she's been doing my hair for... ooooooo... must be five years now. She's done a brilliant job with my hair. From being dry, brittle and riddled with split ends to long and glossy. Can't thank her enough. She's great to talk to as well... A really wonderful woman. :)

Your hair and styling is beautiful, Lisa.

I hope your new hairdresser proves to be great for you as mine is for me. :)


Your hair and styling is beautiful, Lisa.


When you find a great hairdresser be sure to be quite generous when you tip her. Just imagine that if you don't tip enough then she'll be too busy some day and turn you down. These people work long hours while standing. Try to stand up for 6 hours some day. And the blow dryers are hard on their wrists. I'm so lucky to have Amanda as a friend as well as my hairdresser. Leanne

I took care of her. I think she was very happy. And you are so right.


Im so happy for you and that you found such a wonderful place. I know you said they were accepting and so were the other customers at the time, but you were not fully enfemme. Id just ask if you can let us know what happens when you go back fully enfemme, if the other customers are still so accepting.

Best of luck

Love and Hugs,
Patti Remick

I will try to remember this. I never thought of that. Now you've scared me! It will be about one or two months from now.


I have just read your thread Michelia, and would you believe I have an appointment with my hairdresser to-morrow morning where I will have a full perm (three and half hours!)
Lesley Ann.

So how die it go, Lesley Ann? I wan't to know!


I would have cut it off a long time ago but I got past that stupid at the neck phase and now my hair is naturally curlly and I love heary all the GG's come up to ne in the mall and stores telling me how jealious they of me for my hair hehe..

its good to be a gurl

Your hair looks so good. I share your feelings almost exactly. I do not know if I will ever go back to short hair...There is a long hair forum out there. I forgot the name of it. But if you haven't been do it, PM me and I will get the link. It is pretty neat.


My parents, Nigella and Sandra, have a wonderful hair dresser, she's very relaxed and is quite happy to have a laugh and a joke. Even the younger stylists who work with her are genuinly nice and talkative. When I visit mum and dad, I book have my hair done up there.... She's also reasonably priced, which is great for me :)

Thanks for replying to my thread

Amy, you just do not know how refreshing it is for me to see a kid on this forum! It makes it ever more so special - like family. I have kids like you. That know everything about me. They are so happy and well adjusted, that looking back, I would not have done it any other way. It is also awesome to be able to show people we are just normal like everyone else, isn't it?

Please keep it up. It is a tremendous benefit to all of us to have the perspectives of the young ones that grow up like this. And then to know how you feel and think about all these things. My girl is curious but I cannot talk about it online because of an agreement I have with her mom.

My boy likes to read the forums with me sometimes. He is still too young to read everything, so he only does it with me alongside. But he loves it. He asks so many questions, that I ended up realizing how much it helps him understand some things. The best thing is he knows there are many like his daddy out there. Now he will see your post and he will know there are other kids like him out there too!

Good for you!

[Nicole Erin]

Drag queens are NOT crossdressers, they are gay men, so no, they cannot understand us CD or TS folks.

I imagine the DQ meant well, maybe just trying to protect your privacy and all.
Thing is, it is better to be one of the girls. I am glad you found a nice salon where you are among women.