Uh-oh!

[kristigurl]

well girls, need some advice. My wife went out of town last night so I decided to get all prettied up. I was using her make up that she doesnt use to often. After i was done with my eyes, i turned the compaq upside down (not thinking!) and the eye shadow fell out cracking all the makeup. What should i do?! Throw it away or just make excuses? She knows about kristi but not accepting at all.

[Sandra]

Own up then go and buy your own makeup.

[Jenny Wilson]

What about replacing it? Go buy some identical stuff, and then attempt to recreate the wear patterns in the various sections. Hopefully this exact set is still available.

Then, as someone else said, buy your own stuff to use in the furture.

The same goes for cloting and the rest of her stuff. Replacing a 3 year old torn dress could be impossible.

Jenny.

[Lora Olivia]

Tell her you broke her makeup and then buy both of you new, so you have your own.

[kristigurl]

The thing is, i cant just tell her i was wsing. I wish it was that easy but its not, so that is out. The compaq doesnt even have a name on it and not sure what brand it is. I thought about saying i was cleaning out the drawers and dropped it and broke but dont know if she would go for that one. Any other tips?

[TommiTN]

I think you're probably screwed, rude and tattooed to use military slang. Your best bet is probably to own up. She may not be accepting but, as you said, she does know so it won't be a total shock. Either that or forget how to speak English.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

Take the broken one to a department store and buy a new one for your spouse - and while you are there, buy your OWN make-up - the rest of us do

JoAnne Wheeler

[Sally2005]

Isn't it just pressed powder? So press it back in. The other thing you could do is put a huge hole in the drywall behind the cabinet it was stored in and just put all her stuff in a big pile and say nothing, except you hope nothing broke because some of it fell down. Then patch up the hole and just say there was a crack in the wall you always thought you should fix, but you didn't want to do it while she was home because of the mess etc etc etc... you know, its a lot of work thinking up a good lie...your better off to just leave her stuff alone. Its like when someone else uses your tools and doesn't put them back in their place.

[kristigurl]

yeah, i understand buying your own, and i have in the past, but thats not really going to help me now. Some good ideas though girls. I dont think she uses it much so maybe she'll just think nothing of it. Dont know what im going to do....

[Angie G]

Replace it and tell her the bonehead thing you did and if you wish to wear makeup get your own. And tell her you sorry.:hugs:
Angie

[kristigurl]

ok angie, thanks but doesnt help me now. I'll just have to figure it out on my own. You girls have a great day!

[Sheila]

ok angie, thanks but doesnt help me now. I'll just have to figure it out on my own. You girls have a great day!

well if you ain't gonna use advice from the gurls why ask ? :Angry3:

[beenherelongtime]

own up, it will be easier in the long run.

[Angel.Marie76]

Being realistic, don't you think she'd KNOW if you replaced the compact with a /new/ one? The reality of the situation is that you can only do so much to cover your tracks when it comes to certain things. Women usually know their makeup pretty well, so it is probably VERY likely she'll pick up on just about any differences.

I know the idea of owning up to it isn't the happiest one in the world, but the reality is that you're violating your GF's trust by sneaking around anyway (1 and two, trying to cover it up just shows that you've TRIED To sneak around, purposefully, and if I were her I might get just a little curious as to what /else/ might be happening around the house too.

I'm not trying to be mean here, but this is what it is. If she's not accepting, and you're 'driven to dress', then you will likely have to confront this again and again. Best to deal with it now and deal with the consequences than to play hide and seek in a NOT so fun way for however long.

Best of luck though. :(

[martha mars]

dont know what that would be like using some makeup but my owen had my owen for 45 years you should do the same :hugs::hugs:

[docrobbysherry]

Just throw it away! She may not notice for months, and even then, not mention it. Thinking she may have misplaced it!

If she mentions it, just deny any knowledge of it! :eek:

It sounds like you're already quite good at, "denial"!:brolleyes:

[Beth785]

I agree with DRS. Pitch it and don't say a word. If she rarely uses it, she won't even realize that it's gone.

In the long run, you MUST buy your own stuff. That way you won't have to worry about this in the future. Besides, if it's old and cracking, it's prolly best it's replaced anyways.

[Holly]

You have two chances of deceiving your wife about the damaged makeup... slim and none. And even if you are successful, what about the next time, and the time after that? Lies inevitably lead to more lies... an awfully weak foundation for what is supposed to be a permanent relationship. Sounds to me like there is an elephant in the room and everyone is ignoring it. Maybe it's time to talk?

[DonnaT]

One, do not throw it out. You may want to use it again.

Two, Look on the back of the makeup palette, the one that fell out, and see if a name is on it.

Three, if you still can't find a name, you should know where your wife likes to shop for makeup. Take the compact to the makeup counter, if she uses one, and get the SA to help you find a replacement.

Four, it's possible she got it at a drug store, walmart, etc. Visit these places and see if you can find one similar.

[Persephone]

Don't know if it will work on the type of makeup you have or if it will lead to a bigger mess, but, with some makeup a couple of drops of alcohol will soften it and allow you to "fix" it.

[kristigurl]

Thanks for all the advice. To the girls saying tell your wife-to say it nicely, i have many times but its just not something i can do now. She is not accepting, period. Yeah, it would be a dream world if she was, but not going to happen. If you don't understand, then sorry but all of us do not have accepting spouses.

[sometimes_miss]

I know this might not go over big, but a partial lie might work here. Tell her you liked her stuff, liked what she had, and were trying to figure out what to buy for yourself, and dropped it. NOT THAT YOU WERE USING IT. Apologise big time. You can embellish this story with mentioning other things she has that you've admired over the years (earrings, shoes, etc., people love to hear that others admire their tastes), and want some of your own. Now I know I'm late to this thread, but take it out and replace it if you haven't already. And unless she offers, never, ever use her stuff. As much as we enjoy having our women wear our shirts, I'm sure women don't feel the same way about any of their clothes.

[Jacquilynne]

Now, this isn't probably the best advice. . . but I'd just throw it away . . . she might not notice if its hardly used. . .

or

Just tell her you were cleaning some stuff up/looking for something and accidentally knocked it onto the floor and it broke up ??

Now I do agree the best advice is to fess up to the accident. . . I understand though from your replies that you are steering away from this approach. but like others have said if you choose to lie or cover all this up . . . whats next?

I'm sure you know that in the long run its better to be honest . . . accepting the consequences however horrible they may appear to be. I think I'd take a clear conscience over the guilt and worry of a lie covered up.

Finally, all these are our opinions -- only you can decide whats best for you. Hun, I do hope all works out for the best.

Jacie

[MissConstrued]

Yes! Yes! Lie to your wife! Tell her lies!

Then come here and bitch some more when she finds out you're lying and gets angry about it.



Bloody 'ell.

[PretzelGirl]

Yes! Yes! Lie to your wife! Tell her lies!

Then come here and bitch some more when she finds out you're lying and gets angry about it.



Bloody 'ell.

Don't know if I would quite put it the same way, but amen.

[JamieDP]

All I can say is I don't agree with lying to her, but that applies best if "I was in your shoes", but I have an accepting wife of my CDing. Yet there are things my wife is not accepting of in life, such as when I come in a little too late from having drinks...and I always have a choice then...fib a little, fib alot or tell her the truth and endure 2 hours of her complaining, lecturing and being mad. But you know what, it might happen again.

I have to say, many of us have probably been in a situation when they had to decide to fess up to something they meant to do or didn't mean to do, so casting judgement of this one individual for coming to this forum to ask advice while in a state of panic or stress is just not becoming of any of us....

so hon, good luck with your wife. Replacing the make-up is probably the easiest way to manage the situation. Lying about it will be only your own concious to ddeal with. If you do lie about it and she finds out the truth...which women have an uncanny knack for knowing a lame excuse when there is one....but you know your wife and situation better than the rest of us.

Logic = replace. Semi-logic = try an excuse. I'd say even with the truth, replace the item.

Like if someone borrowed somethin of yours....would you just want a sorry...or a sorry with the item repaired or replaced to the best of their ability....

[Sara Jessica]

Thanks for all the advice. To the girls saying tell your wife-to say it nicely, i have many times but its just not something i can do now. She is not accepting, period. Yeah, it would be a dream world if she was, but not going to happen. If you don't understand, then sorry but all of us do not have accepting spouses.

It's not about the degree to which we might have accepting SO's, it's that you apparently don't and you still put yourself in a situation where it could come back to bite you.

You asked advice, you got it. Ignore, replace what you broke, lie, fib a bit or come clean, the choice is obviously yours. With the type of bed you've made, I'd vote come clean. Otherwise, I'm sure you'll find yourself in a similar situation again (and again).

[Paula Siemen]

Welllllllllllll .....if we're to the point of lying to cover are broad asses now,...... then try this one.

"Honey, I was looking for some tweezers to pluck some nose hairs and thought I might find them in your makeup drawer. I accidentally knocked your makeup case out and it broke. I'll buy you another; but please don't be made at me.....and PLeeeeeeeeeeese don't spank me!!!!!!!!"

First off, she'll be so incensed that you would pluck your nose hairs with HER tweezers that....the make up may get over looked all together??????

Shit..............I'm always droping the damned things and they break every f-ing time!!!

[Patty]

Yes! Yes! Lie to your wife! Tell her lies!

Then come here and bitch some more when she finds out you're lying and gets angry about it.



Bloody 'ell.

:iagree:

[2b.Lauren]

I guess I cast the vote for honesty, and wonder if this horse is dead in the process. We can not blame the victim for the act, but can not blame the other victim in the process that was innocent and unaware of the borrowing. We all know what borrowing can do with our spouses and we know the rule don't use her stuff, get your own. If your concern is that you are on slippery ice with things in the first place I would come clean so that you will at least look a little better in the end. She will be angry but hey you can promise to smooth this over with buying her the new compact and telling her you will not do it again.


If you do lie about it and she finds out the truth...which women have an uncanny knack for knowing a lame excuse when there is one....by JamieDP"

Boy do they ever. It was funny I had labored over telling or more so reminded her about my dressing for about 6 or more months, the fact is she already knew about it, even before I brought it up and was kind enough not to throw it in my face. Her remark about that was I might be slow on the uptake, but eventually I am way smarter than you think sometimes and able to put the peices in place. I did find a dress that was supposed to go to the thrift store in your bag in the car, that you left open. I knew and was okay with this and did not mention it to you. So you get away with a lot but I am aware and you should know this. Women in general are perceptive, and I also think that as men who are intune with our feminine sides we also get to be included in the comment. If we had half of the perceptive qualities that they do, and I am off the charts on the Myers Briggs in perception, we would think better and know better! Good luck, be honest to whatever point you need to be, but once you get out of this one, make better choices in the future.

Hugs,
Lauren

[Sally2005]

I vote for the pulling nose hairs excuse! So true, it is very very funny! :thumbsup::heehee:

[Tamara Croft]

What ever happened to truth and honesty in a relationship? If it was your child that broke it, you would expect them to own up about it, you would not teach them to LIE! Or did your mother teach you to lie about things when you were growing up?

Own up, throw it away and replace it. You shouldn't be wearing her makeup anyway, ever heard of cross infection? That's what happens when you wear other peoples makeup, especially on the eyes. If you can't own up to what you have done, shame on you. Was lying and stealing part of your marriage vows?

[DemonicDaughter]

Hun, I know you don't want me to use your tools but I wanted to hang up the picture of me in that gown I wore to the Ren Faire last summer. I couldn't find a hammer so I used the end of the electric screw gun... unfortunately it broke.

Being you hardly ever use it, I just threw it away hoping you wouldn't notice.

Sure its wrong of me to just use your stuff without asking, much less break it, throw it away and lie about it, but I wanted to do something for myself and that's all that matters... right?

If you aren't prepared to pay, then don't bother to play! I find it completely disrespectful of those that believe you should throw someone else's belongings away! Whether or not they use it often has absolutely NOTHING to do with it! Its HERS not YOURS to use or throw away!

[Sandra]

I cannot believe how many have bascially told you to lie. What do you do all day sit around thinking of lies to tell your SOs :Angry3: :Angry3: :Angry3:

[mellisa's wife]

Maybe, just maybe, if you put as much thought and effort into your relationship with your wife, being more honest...... Maybe, just maybe you would have a wife that accepts you and your crossdressing!!!!

Every give THAT a thought?????

:eek:

Just a thought from a very accepting wife!!!

[sometimes_miss]

I cannot believe how many have bascially told you to lie. What do you do all day sit around thinking of lies to tell your SOs :Angry3: :Angry3: :Angry3:
Well, when my SO found a slip I had accidently left out, I had to decide to tell the truth, or lie and let her believe I was fooling around with another woman. I told the truth. I later found out that she could have forgiven a single act of infidelity, but not the crossdressing. She then divorced me and took me to the cleaners. So, truth isn't always all it's cracked up to be. Most people like others to be 100% truthful to them, while reserving the right to 'bend the truth when necessary' for themselves.
Besides, we all lie at some point in our lives, whether to 'save from hurting someone's feelings', or save our own; but we each decide what are 'tolerable' lies, or white lies, and which are unacceptable.
In the words of Sam Kinison, lies keep us together. Much longer than simply telling the absolute, horrid truth 100% of the time. Choose your battles carefully, and choose your truths just as carefully.

[kristigurl]

listen here biatches-you know who you are. You need to back up and check yourself first. I forgot you were so perfect and never have told a fib before ever. So dont come on here trying to judge someone who you dont even know. And you negative girls are telling me if your SO did not approve, you wouldnt struggle when she went out of town to throw on some heels? Why dont you put yourself in the situation and remove the little halo from your head.

[Sheila]

owwww go on what the heck ....... lie ... when she finds out don't come on here moaning that she can't accept your dressing ..........

IT IS THE LIES in relationships that cause the most damage when they are discovered ......... but what the heck you ain;t gonna believe me ...... why cos I am a GG and so many of you are full of crap and disrespect to your partners that you don't give a damn.

You borrowed her stuff without consent, you broke it ....... and now you wanna lie about ................... thank god you ain't my partner :Angry3::Angry3::Angry3:

[Holly]

Kristi, you are the one who came here asking for advice. You are the one who choose and married your wife. You are the one who has decided to try and build your relationship on deceit. If you don't want to take the advice offered, fine. What is not fine is resorting to name calling. All that was attempted to be done was to give you the benefit of a lot of years of experience from the ladies who have posted to your thread. By all means, proceed in the manner of your own choosing. Funny, I always thought a marriage worked because two people love one another and respect and trust them with their hearts.

[Tamara Croft]

listen here biatches-you know who you are.

listen here biatches? how rude are you? I deleted this once, decided to put it back, show members what a rude :censor: you are.


You need to back up and check yourself first. I forgot you were so perfect and never have told a fib before ever.

None of us are perfect, but I'm sure we don't go stealing things, use them, then break them and then come here to try and find the best lie to tell her.


So dont come on here trying to judge someone who you dont even know.

Judge you? you're the liar and the thief, what's to judge? oh and you're rude as well...


And you negative girls are telling me if your SO did not approve, you wouldnt struggle when she went out of town to throw on some heels? Why dont you put yourself in the situation and remove the little halo from your head.

Why don't you get down off that high horse of yours and get a clue. You don't come on this forum, expecting us to bow down to your feet and give you a load of lies to give back to your wife. And the next time you feel the need to resort to name calling, you'll find yourself without a forum, is that clear enough?

[kristigurl]

The funny thing is that the ones that say they havent ever told a lie and have great marriages are the ones who really dont and are probably liars themselves.
I would like to apologize to anyone offended. I did take care of the situation and did not lie, but thats not really the point anymore. The truth is that marriage is not easy and anyone who says it is is lying. We have our problems like every other married couple. But this world could live without the hypocrites. Speaking of deceit, when we portray ourselves as women, isnt that deceit in itself? The point being no one is perfect and i hope you girls do not continue to judge me.

[Tamara Croft]

Speaking of deceit, when we portray ourselves as women, isnt that deceit in itself? No, it's only deceit when you lie about it to others, taking something that doesn't belong to you, then lie about it... that was the point being made and not just to you, but to those that gave you advice to lie about it, they should be ashamed of doing so.

[Sheila]

The funny thing is that the ones that say they havent ever told a lie and have great marriages are the ones who really dont and are probably liars themselves.
Speaking of deceit, when we portray ourselves as women, isnt that deceit in itself? The point being no one is perfect and i hope you girls do not continue to judge me.

actually no one on here has ever said that they do not lie ........ but there are liea and there are lies

& no portraying yourselves as woman is not a deciet but, now lying about doing it, is, see the difference.

And for your information Debs does not lie about her Cding and we have a great relationship ...... but then again our relationship is based on honesty, trust and respect :)

[DemonicDaughter]

listen here biatches-you know who you are.

You judged others by calling them "biatches".


You need to back up and check yourself first. I forgot you were so perfect and never have told a fib before ever. So dont come on here trying to judge someone who you dont even know.

You came here seeking advice. Obviously it wasn't what you wanted to hear.


And you negative girls are telling me if your SO did not approve, you wouldnt struggle when she went out of town to throw on some heels? Why dont you put yourself in the situation and remove the little halo from your head.

I don't believe someone telling you to be honest is being "negative". And most are confessing to owning their own stuff so even if they did dress without their SO present, they wouldn't have to lie later on when they've ruined something of hers.


The funny thing is that the ones that say they havent ever told a lie and have great marriages are the ones who really dont and are probably liars themselves.

To quote you, "So dont come on here trying to judge someone who you dont even know."


I would like to apologize to anyone offended. I did take care of the situation and did not lie, but thats not really the point anymore. The truth is that marriage is not easy and anyone who says it is is lying. We have our problems like every other married couple. But this world could live without the hypocrites.

No one said marriage was easy, nor did they ever say you won't get opinions you will always agree with. I find it funny that you took so many people's advice to be upfront and honest as such a negative just because it put you in a bad light. So? Here's a bunch of people saying to live openly, honestly and to be who you are yet you feel they are being mean?


Speaking of deceit, when we portray ourselves as women, isnt that deceit in itself? The point being no one is perfect and i hope you girls do not continue to judge me.

And as far as it being deceitful to portray yourself as a female, its only if you aren't honest with others. If you are in the closet, the only person you are trying to convince is yourself. But then again, you know who you are so therefore it can't really be deceitful. If you outright lie to others in an effort to make them believe you are a woman when you are not... then yes that's deceitful. But just dressing as one? I dress in a nurse's outfit, does that mean I'm trying to convince the world I'm part of the medical profession? No, it means I like how I look in the outfit.

Not to mention, you know some people on here are TS and therefore ARE women and are NOT being deceitful.

[kristigurl]

No offense, but i would never take advice from someone whose screen name is demonic daughter. The point is dont try to point out the faults of others when you know you yourself have many problems-that goes to everybody. Have you told a lie today-yep. As far as i'm concerned, this thread is done. I've already taken care of it and didnt even have to lie. Plus this thing about atealing her makeup? If you knew about marriage, whats yours is mine and vise versa. Hogwash.

you girls have a great day!

[Sandra]

I refer you to my SOs signature

IF YOU DON'T WANT THE ANSWER
DON'T ASK THE BL**DY QUESTION






Oh and yes we are happily married and she doesn't lie about her Tgism

[Tamara Croft]

No offense, but i would never take advice from someone whose screen name is demonic daughter.

Rudeness again? The problem with you, is you can't take constructive criticism.


The point is dont try to point out the faults of others when you know you yourself have many problems-that goes to everybody.

LOL... listen to you, you're the one who came here asking us how to lie to your wife... seems there's a big problem with you, not us.


Have you told a lie today-yep.

Speaking on behalf of all of us are you? No, I haven't told a lie today, just gave some people the honest truth, which obviously was a mistake, as you prefer to hear how to sugar coat things :rolleyes:


As far as i'm concerned, this thread is done.

It will be done when it's done, going to lock it are you?


I've already taken care of it and didnt even have to lie.

Why bother coming here to ask for our help then?


Plus this thing about atealing her makeup? If you knew about marriage, whats yours is mine and vise versa. Hogwash.

BULLSHIT!! If that is the case, you wouldn't have come here asking for advice, then when you didn't like what you heard, you spat the dummy... are you sure you're old enough for this forum? because you are sounding more like a 5 year old spitting the dummy... my advice? grow up!


you girls have a great day!

I'm already having one, with a family that doesn't feel the need to take my things without asking...

[DemonicDaughter]

No offense, but i would never take advice from someone whose screen name is demonic daughter. The point is dont try to point out the faults of others when you know you yourself have many problems-that goes to everybody. Have you told a lie today-yep. As far as i'm concerned, this thread is done. I've already taken care of it and didnt even have to lie. Plus this thing about atealing her makeup? If you knew about marriage, whats yours is mine and vise versa. Hogwash.

you girls have a great day!

My screen name is cause for you to judge me? How interesting... Oh wait... isn't that you being a hypocrite? Did you not just get done posting about "judging" someone you "don't know"? Talk about a pot calling a kettle black. Tsk tsk, you really should learn to read your own words before attempting to bash another.

Actually you did try to point out everyone's faults by stating how they must have bad marriages, lie themselves and that "no one is perfect". That's pointing out faults.

And if it was "whats yours is mine and vise versa" then why would you have to hide that you used her makeup? I mean you own everything that's hers. So why even bother asking for advice on what to do when you only broke something you already own?

Sounds to me like hogwash alright... only coming from your end.

[celtic.blue.eyes]

No matter what you decide to tell your wife, your first obligation is to make good on replacing another person's property that you broke. In this case, since the item cannot be identified, I'd replace it with an upgrade. You say she didn't use it much, so it's quite possible she wasn't particularly fond of it anyway. Consider taking the broken item to a department store and find the MAC or Clinique counter or something, and ask if they can replace it with similar item. The one you broke has probably passed it's hygienic expiration anyway, and wouldn't be considered safe to use.

What you tell your wife is up to you; but I can tell you form experience, if there is the slightest perception of a lie, there will be hell in your household.

(Are you of the Homer Simpson mentality?? - Ahhh...now for that happy period between the lie and the time it is found out.)

[trisha59]

Kristigurl:
My father always said, if you find yourself in a hole, stop digging. You have provided the clearest example of this advice that I have ever seen

[Sheila]

Kristigurl:
My father always said, if you find yourself in a hole, stop digging. You have provided the clearest example of this advice that I have ever seen

good Post Trish:D:)

[kimberly ann487]

Wow we certainly are a bunch of creative liers. Take it from one who knows, lies suck they just beget more and more lies. They make things worse. Ok most of us live a lie as it is so don't make things worse by creating bigger woppers. I know I'm paying for some big ones in my past. My wife knows I dress and hates it. If it weren't for my past discretions and subsequent lies she might be more accepting today. Oh well maybe.
KIM

[anna kate]

My wife also is unaccepting, but when I accidentally dropped her make-up (in the toilet) I told her and appologized. Much to my surprize, she said I had to replace it. We went to CVS and she picked out what she wanted and said "Now pick what you want." I did so and when we went to the counter to pay, she announced that half the make-up we were buying was for her crossdressing husband (pointing at me). Nobody even batted an eye. The experience cost me $200.00 but you know what? I'd do it the same way again. Wives are not stupid, give her credit where credit is due. She knows about you and still sticks it out with you. You are on the way to some kind of tollerence from her.

[Ballerina]

I'm surprised that this topic hasn't been closed, yet.. It needs to be. Our choices are our choices and poking sticks at each other is not going to help any. This forum is here to give advice, not to slander and beguile each others' life decisions. I think a new tone needs to be set, or nothing should be said at all.

[kristigurl]

yeah, so heres the new tone, i took care of the situation without lying even after a lot of the advice agreed with that. Here's the thing though, there are so many cd's out there that havent told their wives anything about it. I understand how hard that is too, but that is lying in itself. I haven't been on the forum before now in a long time but now it seems like there is so much self righteousness here. I do hope, however, that this will open ppls eyes knowing when they try to condemn someone for something that they are guilty of themselves. It definitely opened my eyes reading the advice.

so no more advice is needed and that includes opinions lol. If you have something you feel you need to share with me, please feel free to shoot me a pm anytime. Thanks again!

[tamarav]

Just tell her a band of Gypsy broke into the hosue and this is the only thing they broke...

Or just 'fess up and tell her. Since she is already aware, this may help you start a dialog with her.

[Sheila]

so no more advice is needed and that includes opinions lol. If you have something you feel you need to share with me, please feel free to shoot me a pm anytime. Thanks again!

well if you had wanted private advice/opinions then you should have pm'd individuals asking for those and not asked for advice in the open forum, and then procceedto shoot the peeps that gave you their advice down in flames.

I would be interested to find out how you solved the situation, as i am sure many others will be

[baby beluga]

I'd like to know how this situation was resolved.