What if the tables were turned?

[Lana Lang]

This is for those CD'ers who are in relationships with a GG. Let's say the tables were turned and instead of you being the CD'er in the relationship, your SO was, and they went the whole hog. I'm talking facial hair, wig, low voice, flattening of chest, growing hair on legs, prosthetic in pants. How would it make you feel and do you think you'd be accepting of it - even if they promised to only do most of these things on a part time basis? What if they asked you to go out on the town with them, do you think you would jump at the chance or find it just a little too strange?

[AllieSF]

Great question that I have wanted to ask for a long time. Even though we are from the CD side dealing with unacceptance from others, I would say, at least for me, that I would be hesitant at first to fully get on board with their program. I like women that are attractive. They can be attractive in male clothes, but to go the route of a hairy body, that might just cross my limits. But then again, I grew up in the Mid-West and since I have lived in California for so long now, my viewpoints and acceptance have changed 180 degrees. So, maybe time would tell and I would change my opinion over the long run. I can say that I would not freak out, at least not too much!

[Hali]

For people to see u around town with a woman that can pass as a guy with the beard, mustache and all of the masculine trait? their assumption will be definitely GAY.. (as if beign gay is something one can help) and especially wen u kiss a bearded guy. wow u definitely imagine how what i imagin sometimes thats why i hardly force my SO to go along with the CDing cos i dont how she feels about pples opinions. wat a thot!

[Jenniferpl]

I would tell her to go for it. you never know where life will take you. It is the journey that make life worth living. The better the journey, the better the exerpeince.

[Mollyanne]

I would accept that, and why, well because this is who I am. I can and have accepted different lifestyles throughout my life.
I have accepted the fact that I LOVE to dress as a woman and become a woman, why wouldn't I accept the fact that my SO wants to dress as a man. Actually we could swap roles, now that would be interesting!!!!

Mollyanne

[xAnne_Mariex]

I'm not sure if i'd be too happy about it tbh, those things you listed would take away everything I find attractive about a woman.

I would support her, but it would very much be a 'if you wanna do it, do it, but I don't want to see it' situation.

[O2B Barbara]

I would finally experience what my wife is experiencing. That said, how could I be anything but supportive?

[Kate Simmons]

Yeah that. That argument doesn't seem to hold much water. Most women don't take that thought seriously. Mainly because most women would not want to be a man in the first place, unless of course they are TG or TS.:)

[JennSC]

A great and thoughtful question!

My first impulse was exactly what her's was to me... UGH! After a few minutes reflection however, I would have to be accepting of "him" and see where the new expression of this inner personna goes. Just as my TG/CD nature is taking our marital relationship in a different direction.

[Jess_cd32]

First I'd be very curious why she's doing that and start asking alot of questions. I've thought about this before, its always good to put yourself in someone elses shoes when asking for acceptance of something.

I guess if she just wanted to do it at home I'd be OK with it, going out in public, maybe if she truly passed as a guy. The prostetic idea kinda freaks me out abit though. Knowing myself though I'd probably grab her and ask her if she's happy to see me:doh: Overall it'd take some getting used to but I would accept her that way if that was a true part of her, but I'd still want my girl as is at least 70-80% of the time.

[TGMarla]

Adrianna, many women would say the very same thing of us. Why would a man want to dress and appear as a woman unless he was either gay or wanted to be a woman in the first place. Yet there are many, if not most, of us who don't fit into either category. It shows that the answer is much more complicated than what is on the surface. I admit openly that I'd have a difficult time accepting it. I married my wife to have the woman that she is in my life as my partner. I would not be attracted to her as a man. She did the same with me. She didn't marry Marla. And she is rather traditional in her values. This is why I keep her away from my wife. She didn't sign up for her, so I try to give her what she did bargain for.

That said, how could I be anything but supportive of her if this was the case? I'd be the worst kind of hypocrite. I would force myself to accept her no matter what.

[corrinediane]

Sure would be different! From my perspective as a Cder it would be fun. I suppose it has a lot to do with your sexual preferences and fantasies. I'd do it! Funny though, I wouldn't ever date a "guy". A cd\tv\ts is a whole different thing.

[Tashee]

WE all have these tendencies growing inside of us. I worked with many women officers who you swear were turning male bit by bit. short short hair. scruff- Don't know how that happens. Some were married. after the 20 years retired--Retired the Hubby too--Moved on to greener Pasteur's or so they think.

The fellas think the power turns these girls like that. That doesn't hold up. Knowing me.

But before my relation ship got to where it was serious---I stated the double standard----I love a women to enjoy and wholeheartedly love being a girl..And so do I----

I will still be your man. And Lord I am a man to a fault---If one can be...

So surprises and changes I would dislike----I believe in being open and up front--That said I believe that one has the option to change his or her mind.

With Love T

[superpike]

Lana, if your avatar was my SO and she wanted to dress and be like a man, I'd let her. Otherwise....I'd have to say no way!

[beenherelongtime]

it is a good question, looking at it honestly, i don't think i could have handled it, i might have gone for the dressing, as a lot of women wear slacks and mens shirts anyway. but hairy arms, underpits and legs would turn me off.

[JenniferR771]

Hmmm...trying to picture it. (her). Does Taaz.com have an option to add facial hair? Short hair? Coat and tie? Just wondering what she would look like.

[Joanne Curl]

Interesting question. I'm still attracted to the feminine side of my wife. If she wanted to present as a male I don't think I'd feel attracted unless I could be the female. It's something I've never considered but if I could cross dress while she crossed as a male, I think I could accept it.
Joanne

[AliciaWeb]

Dressing, flat chest, beard (well trimmed) would be fine with me but not body hair - apet hate and the bane of my life. I would expect to go as far in my transformation though.

[Lilith Moon]

I would go for it and even enjoy outings together. Wow, what a rush...if I were allowed to be the female, of course.

[curiouslooker]

This is for those CD'ers who are in relationships with a GG. Let's say the tables were turned and instead of you being the CD'er in the relationship, your SO was, and they went the whole hog. I'm talking facial hair, wig, low voice, flattening of chest, growing hair on legs, prosthetic in pants. How would it make you feel and do you think you'd be accepting of it - even if they promised to only do most of these things on a part time basis? What if they asked you to go out on the town with them, do you think you would jump at the chance or find it just a little too strange?

I would feel the same way any loving partner would. I would accept it if it was not a constant thing. A little playtime and role playing is fine. Let it take over and be a full time commitment I would have a problem.

[sandra-leigh]

This topic gets raised as a "new idea" from time to time. (Guess you have to expect that sort of thing to happen when there are so many posts and so many new members.)

So what I did last year is took the question to the Transmale section (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=79209) asking them whether anything like that had actually happened to them and what their partner's reaction had been. The short summary: NO, the transmen don't think like that: they either knew and asserted their transmasculinity from quite young, or else they separated or divorced before they realized the extent of their transmasculinity.

[Fiona K]

I wonder.
I wonder how many truly would "go for it".
How many "hetero" guys would like the idea of bound breasts, false stubble or beard, and a phallus?

Really?

I don't believe half of the claims, yeah, whoopee!

It is after all an academic exercise for most of us, we love the idea that the SO is being unreasonable.

Of all the thoughts to keep in your mind if you have the temerity to accuse your SO of being unaccepting, this is it.

[TxKimberly]

On a part time basis - I would accept it as my wife has accepted me.
Full time - not a chance, but then my wife wouldn't accept me going full time either.

[celeste88]

Let it take over and be a full time commitment I would have a problem.

Whilst of course different people have different circumstances and thus one rule cannot apply to all, I think the above statement nicely sums up what it is that we as crossdressers need to think about. We need to see if we are engaging in our own activity too much without thinking of our partner anymore, and such a course would be a recipe for disaster.

I haven't totally shared my secret yet, but this site is really helping me to decide what to do and how to do it... thank you everyone

[jruiz]

"I like my wife being feminine"
"I could not tolerate mustache or body hair"
"Not in public"
"Only if she lets me cd"
"Is she gay or transgendered"

.
.
.
"She says she want's her husband back. I'm still a man despite the clothes"
"My wife won't let me shave my legs, it's so unfair"
"She doesn't want to see me dressed"
"She doesn't want to have sex with me while dressed"
"She doesn't understand I'm not gay or want to become a woman"


And this is coming from us, the CDs... go figure how understanding can really be somebody who has nothing to do with cross dressing.

[jazmine]

I often wondered about this. I would say, knock yourself out kid, have fun.

[danielle_from_cal]

I could stand anything but the facial hair. If my wife dressed as an "effeminate" male, I could handle that. I am quite attracted to effeminate men anyway. But I also love that she most often dresses quite femininely. I would miss that if she were to dress as a man fulltime. If she had a functioning penis, that would be really fun!

[linnea]

I would accept that, and why, well because this is who I am. I can and have accepted different lifestyles throughout my life.
I have accepted the fact that I LOVE to dress as a woman and become a woman, why wouldn't I accept the fact that my SO wants to dress as a man. Actually we could swap roles, now that would be interesting!!!!

Mollyanne

I think that this would be fascinating and probably wonderful. I would definitely support her in her efforts to transform and present herself as male. I do have one concern; it's the same one she has about me as a man: she would have to shave regularly so she doesn't scratch my face with her beard!

[Kelli Michelle]

It would be hard to give an objective answer to that, seeing how we are always seeking for and preaching acceptance. In that vein, I would totally support her. How could I do less than what I would ask of her? I could certainly give her some excellent pointers on how to look, act, and dress like a male.

[CharlotteW]

If my wife wants to dress as a man once or twice a month, that's fine with me.
If she decided to wear boxers everyday, that's OK too.
If she wanted to wear baggy jumpers, scruffy jeans, those disgusting Ugg boots or those pseudo-work boots (the pink ones) and absolutely no make-up, then she'd look just like 99% of the rest of the women in society:)

[Rachel Morley]

My wife does actually do this from time to time but only for fun parties not in a more serious way like I do. She last did it on Halloween. She's the dude in the picture below. (to see her as her normal self click my avatar) I thought she looked really cute as I of course still saw her as my wife (as she still sees me as her husband no matter how femininely I present). I seriously wanted to go out with her to a pub or a sports bar or whatever and shoot some pool but she said she would feel too nervous about doing that with a a lot regular guys around her. To answer your question, I prefer us going out together as "two girls" but I'd be ok with it just me being in dresses and her being all "guy-ed up" if it was not a full-time thing and she didn't plan to transition I would be totally ok with it ...... it rather like the situation we have now with my dressing!

http://img354.imageshack.us/img354/9689/carlas2nd1.jpg

[kristinacd55]

What if tables were turned?
We'd make one heck of an unusual couple!! Although, in college before we dated for Halloween I was dressed enfemme, and she was a man. So we'd be back where we started. :)

[Intertwined]

I do not believe that we can give you the answer you are looking for, because, Your perspective all depend on where your feet are standing.:2c:

To your question, sure, I would probably be uncomfortable with what you proposed, but, I would not be embarrassed to be seen with her, even dressed as you described, my wife could dress full time like Bozo the clown, and if it made her happy, I would be O.K. with it, may be not thrilled, but O.K. with it.


For people to see u around town (editted) their assumption will be definitely GAY..

If she looks like him, and he looks like her, honestly, the would probably just be confused.


The prostetic idea kinda freaks me out abit though.

Kinda unrealted, but, my wife is a leg amputee and has a prostetic leg, and it does not freak me out, neither would any other prothetic, of course I do not get freaked out by much, I went to the hospital to get her amputated leg and take it to the mortuary for cremation.


I don't believe half of the claims, yeah, whoopee!

Sorry, but that thats :BS:, we were asked our point of view, and I can not answer for the others here, but, one thing im known for, is telling the truth.

[DemonicDaughter]

...is that you all are cd/ts/tg and your partners are not. So this argument doesn't work as you would be more willing to accept, understand and tolerate it in your life.

Now to say something like... "what if your partner wanted to be a fetish model?" - or anything along the lines in which their attire is questionable, possibly considered sexual and in which they would get a lot of attention walking about in it.

Truth is, saying things that put your partner in a similar situation doesn't truly answer your level of acceptance. Putting them in a situation that you would have the least desire to see them in or find them least attractive, etc would be far closer to how many SOs feel.

I should know. As a female Drag Queen in which I get a lot of attention for my outlandish, sexy costumes... most men do NOT want to be around that.

[Alice Torn]

I wish the lady could feel, understand the sorrow, rejection, lonliness, isolation, and disenfranchisement, and frustration, that many men know so well today, especially single loners, with no families, or SO's. Then, she may think a second time, and be glad she is a birth girl. Girls have a lot more attention, fun, and are in demand. Many lone men, are unwanted, feared.

[StaceyJane]

Let's see my doesn't shave her legs all that often and she likes to wear my clothes, she also doesn't wear makeup. Maybe my wife is a CD'er!!!
Really I'm slowly becoming more femme than her.

[DemonicDaughter]

I wish the lady could feel, understand the sorrow, rejection, lonliness, isolation, and disenfranchisement, and frustration, that many men know so well today, especially single loners, with no families, or SO's. Then, she may think a second time, and be glad she is a birth girl. Girls have a lot more attention, fun, and are in demand. Many lone men, are unwanted, feared.

I wish men could understand the sorrow, rejection, loneliness, isolation and frustration that so many women know all too well today. Especially those that are single with no families. Then maybe he would think twice and be glad he was born a male. Men have a lot more freedom, room for aggression/competition without their sexuality being questioned. Many lonely women are considered gay, cold and/or unwanted.

You know, until you've lived as a woman, please don't paint the grass greener on this side of the fence. No one sex has it any easier than the other. For every good thing about being a woman, there's a downside.

Oh... and making it sound as if women don't give men a second thought and implying they are shallow, does not help anyone get any closer to finding an SO. How about trying to be more positive and not blaming the loneliness on someone else?

[charlie]

Obviously, I do not want a hairy body and mustache now. So how would I feel if my bride suddenly decided to have one? I would have to give her her space to experiment, but with limits and times. That way everyone gets to be what they want and the limits means the other partner gets the very person they married and wanted in the first place. It would be a very different house.

[Kristen Marie]

But I think there are stages to this. My wife wears jeans, works in the yard...hard, works out at the gym, skis as good as me...and growing up was a tomboy. And she's also beautiful. I love all those things in her. She can wear some of my clothes, but I get a push back should I wear her's. So, maybe to some degree, we have opened a door for them to be like guys.

If she started acting too masculine (as opposed to tomboyish), I think maybe a part-time arrangement would work for me, but definitely not full-time. I would not want to be full-time myself.

[Alice Torn]

DD, I do not say thaqt women have not had it difficult too. I only mentioned what i have witnessed, in my 54 yrs, as a single man. Most of my friends are also, old never married loners. Some have died alone, and were not found, for days, after. I do rspect, and care about women's tough issues. I actually, have housed two homeless women, at different times, AND, i never had sex with them. In fact, I respect them so , much, that i am still a virgin, not taking advantage with them, even, when I could have! I know it must be very hard, for single mom's. I have lived in as a helper, several times, with handicapped older ladies. I alway open the doors for dates i have had! I cd, in admiration, for them. I stand by what i posted, about what many loner men go through. The suicide rate for single men, is the highest, also. Have a nice day.

[DemonicDaughter]

Lucille,

I have no doubts that single men have it difficult. Nor do I doubt your love and respect for women. Merely pointing out that one man's love is another man's hatred. There are just as many lonely, heartbroken women out there that feel men don't even look their way. Being born female doesn't give us any advantage over being born male; just a different life. That's all.

[Honey]

First time I've really thought about this question, and to be honest at first it shocked me, but then again, I wonder when I told Warped that I wanted to dress etc if she wasn't a little shocked.

I think a lot of girls already do some sort of form of Cd and in reality it's not frowned upon at all, so the dressing side of it would be no different. How many girls do you see wearing jeans, and flannel? Tons.

Growing hair - well they do that anyway, and really it doesn't bother me, I use to be hairy, it's a state I don't want to return to, but if Warped wanted to stay hairy then I wouldn't worry, she's still the lady I married her, I think she would be very much like I am, Honey is always part of my male, I don't suddenly change into anything different on the inside, it's the outside I'm changing when I dress.

At the end of the day the attachment for me downstairs would be interesting, and just like my boobs, if they make her feel more in the role then so be it, I would no doubt grope her - I'm still male after all.

If she came straight out and wanted full time, I would find it hard, as I think if I had as well. Again it's finding the balance that we're both happy with, otherwise what's the point?

I love Warped, and believe I would support her in whatever she wanted to do, just as she has with me. And going shopping as a couple would certainly be entertaining.

[Ruth]

It's an interesting question but in modern Western society there is not a direct converse of MtF cross-dressing. There is a lot of societal role-play attached to the unwritten rules about what one may and may not wear in terms of gender specificity. Because of their position, women have got access to virtually all the clothing styles anyway, so it's rather difficult for a woman to make a clear-cut CDing statement in the same way a man can.
So I see it as very much a hypothetical question. If it were a real situation then I would give my wife the same tolerance that she gives me. But as I said, for reasons that are fairly difficult to summarise, it's not simply the opposite of the MtF situation.

[sharynPA]

I am going to throw this out there, women dress like men whenever they want. Pants, tee shirts, sneakers. They have the freedom to do so. Some wear 3 piece suits with ties, look good too. Nothing said, no raised eyebrows. And Gawd, why do they insist upon wearing some really really ugly shoes. Your wife of gf comes down the stairs wearing a pair of consruction boots, lumberjack shirt, and scruffy jeans.....no problem....try showing up in a taffeta dress.:battingeyelashes:

[Nigella]

What if the tables were turned?

I thought that this thread was about how we would deal with our SOs saying they wanted to be like a man!!

I am really disappointed in the number of posters who have taken this thread and turned it around to how they "are not" accepted. This just shows IMHO how selfish some people really are :Angry3::Angry3::Angry3:

[Bernadina]

My wife is my feminine role model. I think it would be very odd if she decided to emulate a man. Not her at all. I would have hard time adapting if she did.

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

This is for those CD'ers who are in relationships with a GG. Let's say the tables were turned and instead of you being the CD'er in the relationship, your SO was, and they went the whole hog...

I don't believe I would be able to deal with that in the woman I love. I love girly, femininity. That's my personal interest in cding - to become what I consider girly, attractive, sexy, feminine, etc. A masculine SO is not someone I could be attracted on multiple levels because of my own interest in high femininity. I'm pretty sure that there would be something I'd pick up on before marrying a woman who was a ftm cd though. I've had serious relationship problems with women in the past that I didn't feel were feminine enough. I tried to get them to be more feminine, sexy, girly, etc. and they gave me the boot (and understandably so).

In the case that there was no evidence I picked up on and my seemingly feminine wife turned out to be a ftm cd, I'm certain it would cause problems - likely a split. I would not be able to share it with her, as it would really be repulsive to me. The very thought of my wife masculinized (is that a word?) would make it almost impossible to ever make love to her again (or to even be aroused by her).

Could I be close friends with a ftm cd? Absolutely! Any woman who wants to present herself masculine is fine by me. Could I be romantically involved with one? No. It wouldn't work for me. I think it wouldn't work for me because I'm a mtf cd.

In sharing that, I'll probably have to accept the label of hypocrite from some people. Agree or disagree, I personally feel that this is one of those things that is not the same when the roles are reversed. To make an example, if a police officer shoots an armed bank robber in the act, is it the equal flip side of a bank robber shooting a police officer while robbing the bank? I'm NOT comparing ftm or mtf cding to either the cop or the robber's side, only pointing out that not all situations are equal when reversed. Again - just my feelings on the matter. :)

[anna kate]

Don't know. I would hope I could handle it as well as my wife, when I told her about me. Talked to my wife about it and her comment was "Why would I lower myself to the level of men." So, by that I would have to say that she feels men are well behind (lower if you will) wemen. I intend to do my darndest to catch up to her!

[AmandaM]

I wouldn't like it. I don't want to marry or date a crossdresser. Sorry. Regular girls for me.

[Tracii G]

There is a nice couple in my TG group in this stuation maybe next month I'll ask them some Q's about how they deal with it.
Very interesting.I would be OK with it and why not I like guys too just not too hot on beards.

[Sally2005]

It is a difficult question to answer because I can only imagine the situation by thinking about my own in reverse and I can't imagine my wife, given her character, having that desire. A lot depends on how it would change our relationship, I don't think a transition would work, but I think I could handle the occasional outing. I think I would tend to want her to be as passable as possible...I mean, if she wants to be a guy, then she is going to have to learn to drink beer, get dirty and pull the load, stop complaining, fix anything, stop crying, etc.etc. :heehee:

[Alice Torn]

I apologize for ranting a bit, and going off topic some, in earlier posts. I offended some. On topic, I was helping, a female friend, for years. I was one of only two people who had anything to do with her. She has a dark brown mustache, owns no feminine shoes or clothing. I was hoping she would accept me buying her a dress, and nice things, but, she would have none of it. I also liked another female, that only wore men's stuff. I think i could tolerate it part time, in a marriage, or romance, but not full time.

[Angie G]

I really don't know what I'd think I do think it would be hard to handle I know it is sometimes for my wife.:hugs:
Angie

[sarahNZ]

On a part time basis - I would accept it as my wife has accepted me.
Full time - not a chance, but then my wife wouldn't accept me going full time either.

:iagree::yt::iagree:

but seeing as how my darling ex did this for a job :cow: she looked more like a man than I did most of the time, apart from the fact that her hair was longer then mine.

but that said if we were to go out both of us dressed (tg) that could be fun. :heehee:

[Toni_Lynn]

Hmm .... I don't want to get too long winded about this, but given the fact that I am like so like totally turned on when my wife wears men's underwear or a jockstrap when we are, well, um er ---- hehehehe

It goes back to another thread where I said that sine crossdressing is so much fun, I really don't understand why GGs don't do it to the extent that we do -- and that doesn't meand just wearing guy's jeans and shirts!

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[Sarah Doepner]

My bride has never been girly-girly and I own more dresses and skirts than she does. It's not what's in the closet, but what's between the ears that matters here. We made her up as a Hard Case Convict in an orange prison jumpsuit for Halloween. Sideburns, tats and so on. Her own brother didn't recognize her photo, but although she looked male, she was still the same woman inside. She still was concerned with how the grandkids would react and wanted to know if they all were happy and getting the attention they needed. I have no idea how I would have reacted if she had tried to behave as a man.
I've loved and supported her for over 30 years through careers, kids, life threatening disease, economic crisis and she has done the same for me, add crossdressing. If I couldn't support her if she wanted to pursue presenting herself as a man, I wouldn't be worthy of what she has done for me.

[Sammy777]

Sorry in advance for my slightly humorous approach to this question.


Let's say the tables were turned and instead of you being the CD'er in the relationship, your SO was, and they went the whole hog.
I'm talking facial hair, wig, low voice, flattening of chest, growing hair on legs, prosthetic in pants.

Well lets be as realistic as we can be.
If my GG GF wanted to try this P/T

1- Facial hair - well its not really gonna happen is it?
At least not any sort of real facial hair.
I've been in a no beard fly zone for a while now, despite "Samantha".
So, if she were to add some real looking stuff I would give her the same response I usually get - If you wanna be kissed - go shave that shit off your face.

To bad beards aren't called girl catchers instead of crumb catchers. oh well
[Besides, its socially frowned on to not be clean shaven, booo]

2- Hair on Legs / Under arm / ect.
The same way a lot of us get by without shaving those areas
I think she could get by with still shaving those areas.

They are almost always covered up [in guy mode] anyway.
Remember we are still talking P/T here & it is more acceptable for a guy [as a guy] to have shaven legs then it is for a girl [as a girl] to have hairy legs / armpits.
If she really did what to go hairy I probably wouldn't like it at first but ask me again in 2 weeks once its no longer stubble.

3- Wig -
Probably better off getting a shorter haircut that works both ways, or at least style it in more of a long haired guy look.
Think about it - a lot more hair to conceal under a smaller area [wig] probably wouldn't look right & I assume no Hollywood makeup artists are involved in this right? lol

4- Low Voice -
Probably the easiest thing for them to do, a lot harder then higher voices are for most of us to do.

5- Flattened Chest
All part of the look right?
Its not like they are going away for good.

6- Prosthetic in pants -
Now some "anti tucking" add-ons to complete the look is fine.
But you don't need the king kong 5000 duct taped to your leg to look like a guy, a porn star yes, regular Joe - no. lol

7- Clothes - well there is my closet - go to town.

Now with all that being said -
Would I go outside with her dressed like that?
In guy mode: Yes, I'd even have a little fun with it with her err him.
Infemme: Yes, I think that would be one hell of an interesting outing.

Now seriously,
As some have said - of course most [if not all] of us are going to be bias & say yes. Not because we are two faced or lying , but because what is good for the goose is good for the gander.

[Kate Jennings]

I'd love every minute of it.

My SO and I actually play with that role play in the bedroom. She will, on occassion, dress in one of my suits, tie, dress shirts. She styles her hair in male mode [it helps that she has a deep stage background] she "endows" herself with a strapon in those trousers. After about an hour her transformation is complete. While she does that I go all out to make myself up for her and be as femme as I can possibly be. We usually spend a few hours together in our opposite sex modes and I have to say it is an enormous turn on.

It is a turn on mentally because we get a lot of understanding out of it and physically we have a release that I might not have with a "regular guy". If you can get your SO to do this I totally recommend it.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

Well, I would try to be accepting, but it could get to me - just as my crossdressing gets to my spouse

JoAnne Wheeler

[Satrana]

I think men would tackle the situation differently than women and there would be more tolerance. Why?

Firstly women already crossdress extensively. If the question was if you wife wore a masculine outfit, could you cope with that. The answer is yes of course because that type of situation currently exists. The fact that men already embrace female crossdressing means they are a miles ahead of women embracing the idea of male crossdressing.

To go further onto the emulation question with hair and prosthetics, I would listen to why she feels she needs to do this and I would then research extensively. I would not burrow my head in the sand and hope it would go away. I think this is how most men would approach the issue. The male upbringing to approach issues from a rational angle would result in far greater understanding and acceptance levels.

Would it seem strange? Definitely but the thing about strangeness is that it goes away with repeated exposure. After I had seen her 100 times like that I would become blind to the strangeness. After all she is adopting a perfectly normal look - a man - not as if she is dressing up as a Martian. Exposure is the key to overcoming any phobia. SOs who refuse to see their partner crossdressed are committing both to a lifetime of unnecessary intolerance and pain.

So men's existing acceptance of female crossdressing coupled with their greater reliance on facts and rational thinking would result in higher levels of acceptance.

[sally1980]

I would be surprised if my wife did display or suggest such tendancies but I would hope that I would show her the same time, respect and support she has shown me over the years.
Accepting of it? She is still the same girl I married many years ago whatever she wears, looks like or dreams of.