Shaving - The metrosexual excuse...

[jruiz]

I guess that you all have noticed that most models and actors are "hairless". It's very hard to find an advertisement or commercial with a hairy chest.

It's the same in sports, many runners, cyclists, swimmers, even football players shave their body.

I tried. My wife didn't dislike the look, but did not understand why a guy would be concerned about his body hair... It didn't work for me.

I guess that it's also a matter of age. Many teens and men in his 20s are shaved (even legs). Maybe it's not that fashionable for a bit older guy...

Have you managed to use that as an excuse?

(Yes, I do need an excuse, I'm in the closet)

[Want to be Lisa]

My wife and daughter both suggested that I shave my chest a while back because being so hairy wasn't the "in" thing right now. I didn't actually do it until recently. Since it was never discussed again since that time a while back I had to come up with something. Well it was actually easier than I thought. I wear dress shirts for work, and because of my hairy chest I had to wear a T-shirt under my shirt. I just brought it up one day that I'm going to shave my chest because of the way I look in a shirt. The only response I got was that I should wax instead of shave because it would look better.

Now the legs are something else that I have to work on. I think I'm just going to do it and explain later that I liked the way my chest felt so I wanted to see what my legs would feel like. Heck everyone's doing it now anyways right?

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

I started shaving my legs in 2006 - before I was out to my wife. There was a dirty little trick I used to pull this off without raising suspicion. It took a couple of months for everything to fall into place, but it worked beautifully.

Every night as we went to bed, I'd spend some time itching and scratching my legs while adding a comment or two how much my hair legs really itched and drove me crazy. Insert the occasional story about how I'm constantly irritated by this while driving, at work, etc. I made sure to never over do it - always itch for a while, usually make a comment, and sometimes add a story about the irritation. I also made sure I was caught itching my legs around the house from time to time.

In time, it was my wife who suggested that I try shaving them to see if they relieve the itching. Mind you, she absolutely loved my hairy legs (but also loves my smooth legs now). Mission accomplished. I was finally able to shave my legs and have a good excuse to do so.

This approach worked great for me, although patients and some degree of non-obvious acting is required for it to work. I did the same thing for my chest some time later.

By the time it got to my arms, I was already slowly coming out to my wife. Again, she suggested shaving them, but this time it was because I was embarrassed by my hairy arms (which was the truth). She was starting to get the picture about my feminine side, though not all at once.

My armpits were the last to get smoothed out. I was pretty much out by this time. Everything from the neck down gets shaved now (minus one area). I love being shaved, but I don't enjoy the time consuming shaving process.

I hope the leg-trick helps. I know you already shaved, but that angle may still work for you. You can always just say that they're a lot more comfortable that way. They do get itchy as the hairs grow back so NEVER mention that to your wife while you're still in the closet. Always hammer upon the more comfortable angle and keep quiet about the annoyance of shaving and the itchy part as they grow back.

[StaceyJane]

I was thinking of using that as an excuse if I had to. Fortunatly I have never had to give an excuse for shaving my legs and arms. Now if I start thinning my eyebrows that might be harder to explain.

[jruiz]

I was thinking of using that as an excuse if I had to. Fortunatly I have never had to give an excuse for shaving my legs and arms. Now if I start thinning my eyebrows that might be harder to explain.

Maybe you can start scratching your eyebrows... And explain that they only itch a bit, so you only will pluck the itchy part :tongueout

I guess that it'd only work in legs/arms/chest :heehee:

What I don't understand from women is that they have a double speech about man's hairy body.

They don't like fur, but they don't like shaved.

They like hair, but just a bit. What if you are Chewbacca, what are you supposed to do?

Maybe just trim a little... This might work for a masculine image, but for a girls it's not working :brolleyes:

[rachelgirlnw]

Hi jruiz, I'm a closet girl who needs a good reason to shave, too. I started by just shaving my pubic area. That made sex cleaner so it was easy to explain. My wife liked that.

Regarding shaving your chest, you'll notice that you look more fit when you're shaved (even if you haven't done any exercising). I started working out a little more and eating a little better. Shortly after, I shaved and just told her that it makes me feel more fit and keeps me motivated to get in shape. (Do the flex thing sometime in the mirror for her. She'll see it, too.) My wife agreed and actually likes it better now.

Finally, there was a big difference between my upper body and my legs. My calves were still pretty hairy. So I used my electric razor and trimmed way down.

In the end, she likes it all better because I look more fit. So I play up that card. I use an electric razor for everything. It works well, especially on my legs, for taking the hair down to an "acceptable" level without becoming totally smooth. That way I can walk a fine line between masculine and feminine. I do it every month or two. I can't stay smooth all of the time or I think she'd really wonder. But now that she is okay with it, I found I can occasionally take things down to pretty smooth without her even noticing anymore.

All in all, the incentive to stay smooth acts as a good motivator to keep going to the gym. This also makes me look better when I'm dressed. It's the best of all worlds with her approval.

I still haven't found a good way to shave my back, though. I'm not too hairy there so it's not so bad. I'm not sure what other girls do. I'm sure there are salons that help take care of this. Any tips?

[Wendy me]

it's hair .... your hair .... your choice to keep what you like and shave the rest ..... no one cares at all ..... shave it ... thin it .... just do it ....

[Nicole Erin]

Metrosexual? Gyod I hate that word...
It just sounds like some young corporate gay pretty boy in a BMW talking business on his cell phone hahahah
Just say you don't like body hair.

[jruiz]

Hi jruiz, I'm a closet girl who needs a good reason to shave, too. I started by just shaving my pubic area. That made sex cleaner so it was easy to explain. My wife liked that.

Regarding shaving your chest, you'll notice that you look more fit when you're shaved (even if you haven't done any exercising). I started working out a little more and eating a little better. Shortly after, I shaved and just told her that it makes me feel more fit and keeps me motivated to get in shape. (Do the flex thing sometime in the mirror for her. She'll see it, too.) My wife agreed and actually likes it better now.

Finally, there was a big difference between my upper body and my legs. My calves were still pretty hairy. So I used my electric razor and trimmed way down.

In the end, she likes it all better because I look more fit. So I play up that card. I use an electric razor for everything. It works well, especially on my legs, for taking the hair down to an "acceptable" level without becoming totally smooth. That way I can walk a fine line between masculine and feminine. I do it every month or two. I can't stay smooth all of the time or I think she'd really wonder. But now that she is okay with it, I found I can occasionally take things down to pretty smooth without her even noticing anymore.

All in all, the incentive to stay smooth acts as a good motivator to keep going to the gym. This also makes me look better when I'm dressed. It's the best of all worlds with her approval.

I still haven't found a good way to shave my back, though. I'm not too hairy there so it's not so bad. I'm not sure what other girls do. I'm sure there are salons that help take care of this. Any tips?

Hi Rachel,

It looks pretty much like my story. The thing is that, although my wife likes the looks, she is a bit weirded out by the fact that I care about that. She says that body shaving is a girly thing to do.

Regarding back hair: I waxed it once, and it was great. It lasted for about a month, not itchy, and the regrowth is more gradual that with shaving.

In one occasion I shaved it all (except pubic area, bum and arms). It was a great experience. I'm just sorry that I didn't take the chance to get a transformation while it lasted.

[Karren H]

Wendy's right... You don't need an excuse because no ones going to ask you why! No one cares.. I

sit there in the locker room, week in and week out, stripped down to my red low riser briefs next to the hairiest guy I've ever seen.. And I'm completely devoid of hair on my body and do you think anyone has ever said a thing?? They rather talk about the goal I scored or the pass I made or why the other team was a bunch of jerks!! Lol.

[jruiz]

Wendy's right... You don't need an excuse because no ones going to ask you why! No one cares.. I

sit there in the locker room, week in and week out, stripped down to my red low riser briefs next to the hairiest guy I've ever seen.. And I'm completely devoid of hair on my body and do you think anyone has ever said a thing?? They rather talk about the goal I scored or the pass I made or why the other team was a bunch of jerks!! Lol.

I Karen,

I agree 100%. The only person I care what she thinks is my wife...

[sarahNZ]

I am so glad I do not have to go through the excuse book for my chest/back, there is nothing there anyway:heehee:

jelous yet?

[Annie D]

I have shaved my legs for the past 6 or 7 years, teach physical education and coach at the high school level. I wear shorts in the fall and spring and of course the entire summer. Don't tell me that high school students don't notice and have no hesitation about asking questions. I get maybe one or two every semester. My reply is that it looks cleaner, feels cooler and both my wife and I like the feel. In addition, to all the students I come into contact with, the teachers who see me in shorts and all the people who I come across when out in public, no one other than a student has ever asked me about my shaved legs. I never thought that I had to give a reason why I shave but rather why I keep them shaved. Since I am outside a great deal, they tan rather easily and I think that they look good, even at my age!

If you need a reason; when I got my ears pierced, I just told everybody that I lost a bet. Feel free to use if you really think it is necessary...LOL!

[diannecourtney]

I went in for minor surgery and the bod was clean shaven from head to groin.
Told the wife I like it so much that I extended to the legs, where due to taping from playing football, there has been no hair from about 6" above the ankle all my life so people really have never commented:):):)

[sharynPA]

I like that itchy leg syndrome....good idea.

[jane_cd123]

I'd also been trying to think of an excuse, although mine will be for getting waxed, but same thing I suppose. Luckily I don't have many people to explain it to, I'm single with no kids so it only really leaves my parents (Who know about me but we never talk about it) and work colleagues.

I've already decided to go hairless, but it will be a big difference because I'm unfortunately very hairy :( there is no way I could get away with removing my body hair and people from work not noticing. Luckily they already know that I'm very self conscious about it. I decided to start bringing up the possibility of waxing with them to see what reaction it would get, I said I was thinking of getting a back and shoulder wax. I was waiting for them to fall about laughing, instead two of the guys admitted to getting waxes themselves and as we talked about it the girls were basically asking me why stop there if my body hair bothers me, they said I should try a chest and full arm wax, or if I could put up with the pain then even a full body wax.

Seems like I was worrying too much about how to explain it really, lol, the funny thing was the next day when I got into work, some of the girls had brought in the flyers from the beauty salons they go to and left them on my desk :)

[Lesley Ann]

When I was a boy I used to watch my Father have a 'strip wash' at the sink (we did not have a bathroom in those far off days) and remember thinking 'When I get older I'll have mussels and hair on my chest' and what happened? Not a noticeable hair on my body! When I got together with my SO we talked about this, and I can't remember who's idea it was, but I shaved down there, she hated it, but likes me being smooth bodied. Just thought I'd put my:2c:in.
Lesley Ann.

[Sally2005]

I took the plunge and epilated my lower arms, hands, fingers, feet, stomach, upper legs in groin area and chest (very little chest hair naturally). So far no comments from my wife...I'm not out, have no excuse planned except I just felt too hairy. And with glee, I'll ask 'so?! do you like it?'.

Actually, ages ago, I tried telling her my socks always pulled on the hairs on my feet (true)...she looked at me funny when I said I should shave them...I started epilating them anyhow and she never noticed.

[Stephanie Stephens]

Just call it manscaping and the world will understand. In an interview, Robin Williams was asked if he shaved his butt for a particular film shot and he replied "with what a weed eater".

[Christie ann]

The only one who will notice or care is my wife. When I go to far (and that definition always changes) I get the "I don't want my husband looking like a girl"

The rest of the world are talking on their cell phones and don't notice anything.

[jruiz]

Just call it manscaping and the world will understand. In an interview, Robin Williams was asked if he shaved his butt for a particular film shot and he replied "with what a weed eater".

A quick Google on manscaping, and look what I got:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ddd2UXLL_xo&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ddd2UXLL_xo&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

[Ruth]

The world is indifferent to the amount of body hair you have. I am totally shaven, I go out in shorts and T-shirts in summer and don't get people pointing.
The area you have to deal with is your wife. Coming out as a CDer solved it for me, but if you want to tread a different path there are lots of lines you can use. I would think that something near the truth might be best, for instance, "I just don't like being hairy".
This happens to be true for me as well, even when I'm dressed as a man, but it also improves my femme look no end.

[KristinSkye]

Gabrielle...your method was very smooth (no pun intended).

I kinda lucked out with my genes, the only parts I have hair on are my legs and armpits. I've shaved 'down there' for years.

I feel your pain jruiz. I wouldn't mind just getting rid of it all, but I could never deal with the comments I would get from my friends, and probably wife.

[Jamie001]

There is no excuse needed except that you don't like body hair! A lot of men shave their heads when they have a perfectly good full head of hair? Why do that do it? Because they don't like hair or prefer to be hairless. That is all there is to it. No need to make excuses.


I guess that you all have noticed that most models and actors are "hairless". It's very hard to find an advertisement or commercial with a hairy chest.

It's the same in sports, many runners, cyclists, swimmers, even football players shave their body.

I tried. My wife didn't dislike the look, but did not understand why a guy would be concerned about his body hair... It didn't work for me.

I guess that it's also a matter of age. Many teens and men in his 20s are shaved (even legs). Maybe it's not that fashionable for a bit older guy...

Have you managed to use that as an excuse?

(Yes, I do need an excuse, I'm in the closet)

[Sammy777]

Anytime I was asked about the lack of arm hair I just used my favorite old line of:
"I tired of the Robin Williams look".

Good enough reason & it gives them a visual to boot.
Face it, that guy has hand carpets, lol.

Also if you try to trim just the hair on your hands down it looks kinda stupid without long sleeves & just makes the hair on your arms look thicker.

[María José]

Do you need an excuse to shave your body? You can do it just because you like it :)

Some time ago I used to shave now and then when I dressed. Some times I didn´t shave and then I wore thick pantyhoses and dresses that covered the body. Three years ago I start to shave regulary in the winter, as I was not condifent to go shaved in the summer. One day, my daughter saw me shaved and said she liked it, some of her friends, boys, did it. My wife likes the smooth skin when I´m shaved. And some friends have seen me shaved. What´s the problem to shave? This year I will continue shaving even in the summer. Just becasue I like it. Nobody will ask me whether I do it because I dress as a girl. Nobody knows it, but my wife.

[Stephanie Stephens]

Juriz; That was a terrific video, thanks. Before I started shaving my legs I trimmed them with a spacer thing in an electric hair trimmer. My excuse was that I didn't want to look like a monkey at the spa.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

My Spouse has told me that if I shave my body hair - it will mean an instant DIVORCE ! I'd like a reason to shave too, BUT the ultimatum that I'm faced with isn't all that good

JoAnne Wheeler

[PretzelGirl]

I like that itchy leg syndrome....good idea.

I think I have itchy chest syndrome. I read a medical article where inserting silicone will relieve the itching. :bs:

[kayegirl]

Metrosexual? Gyod I hate that word...
It just sounds like some young corporate gay pretty boy in a BMW talking business on his cell phone hahahah
Just say you don't like body hair.

I'm with MlleErin, just do it, tell anybody that asks that asks that you don't like the smell of sweat, and sweat sticks to hair, ask any french girl or guy.

(Gawd did I just say that and I love France)

[Babette]

....

Have you managed to use that as an excuse?

(Yes, I do need an excuse, I'm in the closet)

I've seen similar threads like this one pop up every three or four months. Obviously the originators have deep concerns and want the benefit of our experiences. Such is a primary value of this forum.

I don't use any excuses because, 1) I never had much body hair to begin with, 2) nobody has ever questioned me about shaving the remaining hair off anyway, and 3) if they did ask, I might either tell them it is a personal matter, or I just wanted to do it. I don't owe anyone an explanation for being hairless.

Closeted or not, I feel it is just hair and to be blunt about it, my hair. Jruiz without understanding the full extent of your lifestyle and personal environment, it is hard for me to offer you any insights. It's still worth testing the water though.

If it is a major concern with you SO, then try discussing it with them first. Then again, if they are totally unaware of your closeted lifestyle, then maybe this is not the best key to try first when opening the door.

Hope this helps.

Babette

[Legs]

For those needing to justify shaving and even wearing of pantyhose or nylons to your SO, or anyone else that might question a hairless body, here is one way.

If you are the outdoors type, hunter, fisherman (shoreline), hiking, ect., shaving does reduce the number of ticks and other insect bites, or at least makes them easier to locate, and remove.

Stockings and pantyhose keeps ticks off your legs and any other area covered.

I used this excuse myself for years before I finally came out to my wife.

But I can tell you this, once she sees and feels your body next to hers, smooth and hairless, she will most likely complain if you let it grow back, at least mine did, matter of fact I started with my legs, and it was her idea to shave everything else.

Huggggggggggs
Samantha

[joanncd]

I get waxed all over, and nobody, certainly none of my sporting mates, has ever said anything.

[Laura_Stephens]

Several years ago I dealt with prostate CA. Hairless is a result and no one cares at all.

[Marilynn]

Body shaving is actually quite common now among the Gold's Gym, muscle-head, spikey-hair, dog-tag-wearin' Guido-types. There's a web site "Hot Chicks With Douchebags" that makes fun of then, and it comes up all the time. Shaved chest and armpits, sculpted eyebrows, and these are guys who think of themselves as Alpha-Males. It's the body-building culture - shave the body and oil up.

Of course, that won't help if you're a middle-aged accountant in Iowa, and your wife isn't into the Guido look.

[Kate Lynn]

Metrosexual?
Where did that word originate?

[Samantha43]

I epilate my chest, my wife epilates my back and I shave my legs. Everything else is nicely trimmed. So far no one has commented. If anyone says anything, I'll say that it's a personal preference.

My wife loves my smooth body by the way. She says I should have done it years ago! WOW, does a back rub feel good now!

[Leelou]

I've noticed that there are a couple other triathletes on this site, and that's my excuse/reason for being shaved nose-to-toes. It's easier to get into a wetsuit when shaved. Road-rash is easier to deal with when shaved. Your legs feel cooler when working out in summer heat. Massage is much better shaved. I've been shaved for three years now, and I'm loving it!

It's totally accepted in the triathlon/cycling community. Just pick up a tri/cycling magazine and show the SO--"you see, they're all shaved".

So get busy! Swim/Bike/Run!!

[saraleehanes]

Samantha,

You kill me. Between those great legs and look and supportive wife, what else can be said.

Sara

[tricia_uktv]

Go for whatever, thin your eyebrows, have your ears pierced. You may get the odd comment but that's fun. Nobody really cares

[Stephanie Michelle]

I shaved a few times over the years, the wife never noticed until it started growing back. I am not very hairy to start. I have been shaving my legs and underarms regularly for the past 4 months. Again the wife didn't notice until I mentioned something to her. She just rolled her eyes and mumbled something. Has complained at all. Although for the last couple of months she has been on me again to move out. But that is another story.

I too (Karen) play hockey and no one has said anything to me. I am not sure when softball starts next month if anyone will notice also. Will be interesting what I will say if it comes up

Stephanie Michelle

[Sharon B.]

I agree with Legs, it is a lot easier to find ticks without the body hair if you spend anytime outside in the summer.

[Angie G]

My wife is the only one that know I dress. I keep my legs shaved yearround with out an excuse hun.:hugs:
Angie

[inquisitiv]

Heck, if I remember correctly, in the movie "Hitch" didn't Kevin James get an on-screen waxing in order to attract women?

[MartineXdrs2]

It's a weird world, if, God forbid, anyone should watch virtually any porn shot in the last 10 years, you'll notice three things: nobody, male or female has any body hair, every guy has a huge perpetual dong, (thanks Viagra) and no woman has breasts that are natural......

When I married my current spouse, she was very hairy,,,, I don't like hairy women,,,,, took some doing but she started to trim a bit,,, then suddenly she shaves everything. I asked why and she says it's so much cleaner. Now I do the same thing and she tells me she likes me furry,,,,, If I just leave a little goatie thing she like that... but anyway, I feel it's easier to stay clean, smell nice, be fresh without hair.....

[Carrie R]

I figure I could use that OCD - hair pulling thing as an excuse. There would be an element of truth to it.

[linnea]

I use the feel, the look, the experiment. I've been shaving my legs for years. She hasn't had a reaction. My arms have been shaved for months--nothing.

[Lisa O]

As others have said "I don't like it" is all it should take. Its yours! There will be complaints like its too scratchy now -shave again etc. That's OK. If you have a say in how your SO grooms (and it would have to be a right of veto), then expect the same from her. My grooming is my business.

Given the state of the world, my body hair just isn't that important!

[Satrana]

There is an excellent BBC documentary you need to watch called The Trouble with Nakedness. Part of it is about explaining why we lost our fur during our evolutionary past to become the only hairless ape. I won't explain it all here but women preferred hairless men from hairy ones so we are what we are today thanks to women's choices.

They also ran a test where they photographed men's torsos while hairy and then after they were shaved and mixed the pictures in amongst many others so that the women judges would not notice. In all cases the shaved version scored significantly higher than the hairy version.

So the advertising/fashion industry have got their research right - women prefer hairless men and have done so for millions of years.

[shannonFL]

It was not all that long ago I told my wife I wanted to have smooth legs, I
don't keep secrets from her, she just said I'm not your mother", I wish I would have shaved long ago, I love the smooth all over feel, she does'nt seem to hate it either.:battingeyelashes:

[alexmusic]

Living in Central Texas it is hot most of the year therefore shorts are a necessity and sun block as well but I hated how when applying it would clump on my hairy legs and that is when the light came on for me since then I love my smooth legs.

[Hali]

it's hair .... your hair .... your choice to keep what you like and shave the rest ..... no one cares at all ..... shave it ... thin it .... just do it ....

Call me what ever i always feel there is a limit to what my SO will demand from me and what i can give her, am a CD if no one will cut me any slack i will cut it for myself .......if my SO will not allow me as little as shave my body hair then she definitely doesnt give a rat ass about my happiness and on the other hand if i cant convince the person that is closest to me to allow me shave my body hair then there is no way i can convince the general public to accept my CDing.
Hey everyone how closeted can a CD be if one cant shave their body hair without seeking permission from an SO and the general public and the police and ones Boss in the office and his Mum, Dad and family dog, whats wrong with us? Batty-bats was recently talking about CD freedom and rights, if we cant even shave our body for fear of ridicule then we can as well say bye-bye to our civil rights movements.

Unbelievable!!!!!