End Result??

[SuzyZahn]

I`ve always wondered to myself,,,,after 40 plus years of being `one of the girls`,,, is there an end result/goal which we wish or hope to achieve or come to grips with as our female selfs,,,,and if so,,,,,what is that???

[JoAnne Wheeler]

No - there is never an "End Result" in my opinion - to me each dressing is an

opportunity to work toward improving JoAnne's appearance and an

opportunity to increase and explore my femininity - I hope there is not an end

result because I will be disappointed if I ever get there and have to say, "Is

that all there is ?"


JoAnne Wheeler

"I'm an all American Bluegrass Girl and Proud As I Can Be"

[SuzyZahn]

I can agree with `is this all there is??? A very dead end feeling in all aspects of life,,which is not what i was or hoping to convey,,,but like for me just getting to the point of self acceptance is a major step,,then,,,having a understanding/loving SO/wife,,,then next might be,,, getting out to say a support group and mingling with fellow sisters,,,then,,,,hmmm,,,im sure its very different for all of us,,,just curious

[Jess_cd32]

For me it was integrating the 'two parts' of me into one, haven't been happier since I accepted my other half fully. Now just to find a happy medium with my SO and all would be totally complete, she is as well, my better half:)

[tamarav]

Actually, I do think about this now and then, after also spending well over 40 years as "one of the girls". At this point in my life my major goal is just to get up everyday, and whatever follows is gravy.

I do plan on living forever, and if I don't, I hope to die on the dance floor in five inch heels...

Tami

[Kate Simmons]

I've been asking this very question in a round about way. Not too many seem to get it though.

[2b.Lauren]

Currently, I am not sure about that for me, and or what it might look like. A slow progression of being more able to dress and to enjoy that part of myself is very necessary. More acceptance and understanding from my wife and opportunities to visit the outside world as Lauren would be great for the future.

[Holly]

How about being a whole person and not limiting ourselves to be defined by our sex and/or gender? To have traveled through this place and touched others lives and made them better. To be a well rounded person who has given her/his best to them self and those around them. To face life fearlessly and embrace to joy and awe of being alive and finding something new to delight in each and every day... my :2c:

[Deborah Jane]

I just wanted to enjoy being myself to the max, no matter how i'm presenting and dressed !!!!

I think i'm there and i love it :D

[DawnRodgers]

To quote an old song - "to live, love, laugh and be happy".

[Kate Simmons]

How about being a whole person and not limiting ourselves to be defined by our sex and/or gender? To have traveled through this place and touched others lives and made them better. To be a well rounded person who has given her/his best to them self and those around them. To face life fearlessly and embrace to joy and awe of being alive and finding something new to delight in each and every day... my :2c:Absolutely Holly. Add to that being flexible and tolerant of all. I know my friends are always my friends despite fluidity and despite an uncertain world.:)

[Lora Olivia]

Not yet sure where this road leads. What I am sure about is being happy to be on the road and not in the ditch. Also I very much agree with Holly and Arianna.

[deja true]

I've been asking this very question in a round about way. Not too many seem to get it though.

Well, Mistress, I think many of us get the question...but the question is a conundrum!

We may seem to know what we want, but trying to put it down just stymies us... Even blabbermouth that I am, I'm just not 'Kahlil Gibran' enough to describe it so it really rings.

Holly comes close, I think, but still...even those good words are just not enough...

Ya know what? I may not be able to describe to my satisfaction what it is that my soul is really aching for...but I got a feeling that I'll know it when I see it, hear it, experience it.

Joanne and Lora, like Holly, are close,too...

It's the journey that's important, aint it? ...

Moses wasn't the only one who wandered around in the desert for 40 years!


:)

[Karren H]

First crossdresser in the Hockey Hall of Fame? Though no one picked me up on waivers today so its going to be an up hill battle...

First. Hockey player in the Crossdressers hall of Fame?? :D

[gretchen2]

Well first of all it is hard to beat the first cross-dressing hockey hall of famer. Which in itself is a fine goal, look at Dennis Rodman he didn’t make the basket ball hall of fame but he came close enough.
For me though, I would have to say that total acceptance of both my personalities would be a good goal.

[Rebecca Sue]

"the obsession's in the chasing, not the apprehending, the pursuit you see will never know a rest"

btw Suzy, that's a nice avatar, it shows that you have great taste.

[Shannon]

I am simply enjoying the journey and smelling the roses along the way. I don't envision a destination for myself.

[Hope]

I`ve always wondered to myself,,,,after 40 plus years of being `one of the girls`,,, is there an end result/goal which we wish or hope to achieve or come to grips with as our female selfs,,,,and if so,,,,,what is that???

I think the question you are asking has to do with the purpose of life itself.

When you find the end goal / result of your life, I think it would have to integrate your life as one of the girls in some way would it not?

For many of us, cross-dressing is not somehow just something we do, but it is a part of who we are... I think maybe this is a difficult distinction for guys to make as we are so good at identifying ourselves with our activities and roles in life and judging our success and failure based on how well we perform those tasks (Engineer, Father, quarterback, etc) but being female is not just some role, or activity - it speaks to the very core of our being... What is the purpose of that?

You tell me. What IS the purpose of your life?

[Jonianne]

I`ve always wondered to myself,,,,after 40 plus years of being `one of the girls`,,, is there an end result/goal which we wish or hope to achieve or come to grips with as our female selfs,,,,and if so,,,,,what is that???

Combining what others have said, I would like to have lived a life that has been a help to others through both my male self (father, husband, son, brother, etc.) and to have allowed my femme self (heart) to be expressed outwardly enough to the point that others would look at my life and be able to say he also had such a motherly gentle and kind spirit about him that they would not be suprised nor offended knowing that I have adopted some femme externals as well.

[AKAMichelle]

I believe the end result is when you accept who you really are. It is very hard to achieve. Some find it while others search for years without finding it. Most of us deal with guilt, fear of discovery, and loss of our SO. That much baggage makes it almost impossible for many of us to accept ourselves. We must be doing something wrong otherwise we wouldn't be losing so much.

Most of us spend a good portion of our lives living up to what others want us to be. Our jobs, family, and friends. We have a hard time fitting in because we have this secret. We are sacred that others will pull away and we will be all alone. As we age, we get an attitude of don't care what others think. That goes only so far, since many still hide because of their jobs. Many can't or won't tell their SO. We are kept in the closet for so much of our lives, that some think it is safer to stay there than come out.

That is why I believe the end result is acceptance of ourselves. Whether we find that going out in public or telling someone very important to us. Once you quit hiding yourself from the world, then you can begin finding yourself.

[Tasha McIntyre]

End result? haven't even thought of that!

I'm still basking in the glow of recently fessing up to the wife and not having to hide my clothes, make up or dodgy hair anymore :)!

Ok, end result - maybe to be accepted by the wife to the extent that she can participate, and to wander around the public arena seamlessly all girlied up without a care in the world :daydreaming:

[Kate Simmons]

As Deja put it, it's the journey that is important. When we actually get to our final destination, it may be somewhat anti-climactic. As they say, getting there is half the fun or in our case, most of the fun. In the long run it's called plain old growth or evolution as a person.:)

[SuzyZahn]

Thanks for all your inputs,,,interesting reads,,,seems it varies for all of us,,,but seems so focus mainly on the acceptance of our 2 personnas in a day to day life,,,,For me i guesss i think it would be nice if society totally accepted us in either formats without any judgements bestowed on us negatively,,,,i`ve learned to accept myself now,,,and so has wife,,,which is a major step in allowing myself of my femme exsistance when the `pink fog arrives`,,,anyways,,,its still always a work in progress,,,and i love all the practice!!!

[Carly D.]

To be continued tomorrow... and on and on thereafter.. that would be my goal...