Today was the day, I did it.

[RWillow]

After reading several threads about what will happen when you kick off, I decided that I had to tell my wife that I was a CD. I have had 3 serious health problems, 2 a year ago and one today, only one a year ago had immediate life threatening results, but I thought today that I absolutly had to tell my wife.

After I got each of us a cup of tea and sat back down to watch TV I told her that I had been doing a lot of thinking about my health problems. If anything was to happen I wanted her to hear it from me, not find out by going through my things, "I like to wear women's clothing." Her reply was totally unexpected, she looked up and said "Oh yeah.", nothing more and no sign of surprise. I was shocked by her reply, I had expected her to ask me if I was crazy or gay or anything other than "Oh yeah."

I followed all the good advice I have received and did not overload her with why I dress, when I dress or attempt to show her any fo the few pictures I have. I will wait and see what she says, if she has any questions or what she comments on tomorrow.

I always stay up later than she does so I ask her as she was going to bed "Do you still love me?" "Of course I do. Why wouldn't I still love you?" I said I don't know, I thought what I told you might have made a difference. "It didn't, I still love you."

I feel as though the weight of the world has been lifted from my shoulders, I haven't felt this good in years and I feel freedom for the first time in 40 years. I can finally unpack the secret box and hang my dresses in the closet now that I am out.

Thanks girls, I couldn't have done it without your advice and guidence.

Renyta

[gretchen2]

WOW peace at last. congratulations

[Jess_cd32]

Congratulations and I hope it continues to go well for you both.
It is a big surprise for our SO's to first here this, I think with the health problems you've had she put this in a better perspective right from the git go than most of ours do.

Might I suggest holding off on adding your clothes in alongside hers for the time being. Let this sink in abit more first for her. She obviosly loves you and your whats important to her, not what you wear. She realizes your mortal and cares about having you, regardless if you are a cd, thats a great place to start.

I believe she will start asking you things, and it seems like you've got a good understanding of cd'ing to give informative answers back. It truley is a great feeling to come out to our SO's and have total freedom from all the BS that goes along with staying closeted. My best wishes to you both and hope you stay in good health.

[Sallee]

Wow It was almost Anti Climatic. I for sure would have expect a little more. She may have known already
Any way congradulations I hope it goes well and gets better
Stay healthy

[Mitzi]

What a heartwarming story...

I agree with Jess_cd32, go slow, let her take the lead in deciding how open she wants you to be.

Mitzi

[Sophia de la luz]

Maybe she has a secret box she wants to tell you about soon.

[Nicole Erin]

something about that seems a little too easy.

[Hali]

Congratulations! Am so happy for u.

SOs usually accept it in the initial stage of verbal discussion, the next stage is acceptance of u in the femme persona (panhead67), next is their ability to interact with ur femme side. Some SOs will follow up to the last stage which is interracting with ur femme side then if u dont handle that stage very well things can go wrong she might decide to block the femme part of u totally usually this happens when u become a little obsessed with CDing or started showing signs of transition, usually SOs (women in particular) will start to resist ur CDing. Thats my little experience on this issue.

Hope things will work out for u.

[Tasha McIntyre]

Thats great so far, but you might want to follow this up in a couple of days time if nothing else has been mentioned. just a simple, what are your thought etc about what I said the other night? might be sufficient.

Well done.

Tash :)

[Shelly67]

I,m pretty sure most of our partners have an idea or suspect somethings going on . I also consider that half the problems some of us go thru are caused by lack of considerate communication . I mean , look what happens to those who are caught dressed - or those who kiss and tell but without really thinking it thru properly , just blurt out how much they enjoy themselves dressed , expecting to be accepted . If youre gonna come out , then do it sincerely , quietly in a safe manner , show youre partner the respect you crave .
I think you,ve been very brave , very sensative and correct in youre honesty , congratulations . BUT - dont force the issue , let things develope ( if she so wishes ) at her pace . If the lady goes quiet , then support her no end . After coming clean its a nervous time , for you both , there maybe long deep heart to hearts to come , even the odd argument . Just keep talking . And listen too . Stick with it , at least she,ll respect you for youre honesty and regard for her - that she,ll never deny , liking you as a crossdresser or not .
Good luck with any health issues and all the very best to you both , I hope you find common ground , peace and sincerety in this new chapter of both of your lives ..............

[Rita D]

Hi Renyta-
I have to say I agree with Tasha and Michelle. Take it easy- and keep communicating. I also wish you the best with your health problems. Hope that things aren't as bad as they seem.:hugs:

[kristinacd55]

Congratulations and I hope it continues to go well for you both.
It is a big surprise for our SO's to first here this, I think with the health problems you've had she put this in a better perspective right from the git go than most of ours do.

Might I suggest holding off on adding your clothes in alongside hers for the time being. Let this sink in abit more first for her. She obviosly loves you and your whats important to her, not what you wear. She realizes your mortal and cares about having you, regardless if you are a cd, thats a great place to start.

I believe she will start asking you things, and it seems like you've got a good understanding of cd'ing to give informative answers back. It truley is a great feeling to come out to our SO's and have total freedom from all the BS that goes along with staying closeted. My best wishes to you both and hope you stay in good health.
Great advice from Jess. Give her some time to digest it. :)

[Vicky_Scot]

Give your wife a hug from me..........she certainly sounds a wonderful person.

She loves you for you and that is so precious.

:hugs:

[Sandra]

I can finally unpack the secret box and hang my dresses in the closet now that I am out.

Renyta

Whoa slow up a bit hun, ok so you've told her and she was ok about it, but my guess is that she's got a load of questions to ask. Talk to her a little more and ask if it's ok to unpack the clothes you have. I can understand how you must be feeling but please don't let the pink fog take over. Work at this together, and remember your wife would be most welcome here.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

Peace at last, peace at last - thank God almighty for peace at last - great

thing that you did - and an even greater thing is this FORUM to give advice

and comfort

JoAnne Wheeler

[Shannon]

I agree, give her time to digest and let her take this at her own pace. But, for her own sake, I do hope she does bring it up again and asks a few more questions. If she never brings it up again, I would be uncomfortable.

[beenherelongtime]

i agree with most posts here. i wouldn't unpack so quick, she might have had an inkling or even known. because she took it so easy, don't push, as they say, converse, she might not react so great to your dressing in front of her. it is best to talk to her and have her express her views and boundaries. she sounds like she is a great women.

[RWillow]

I guess I should have been more clear last night but I felt sooooo good to get it off my mind I rambled a bit.

I did unpack this morning but I hung everything in a closet in my computer/radio room, she never goes in there so it won't be in her face so to speak. I am going to hold off dressing in front of her, I will allow her to decide when that will be, when she is more comfortable. I will be sure to bring up our talk of last night if she doesn't say anything in a couple of days. I like the advice about asking her what her thoughts are and if she has any questions. As usual you girls are right on the money with advice, I could never have told her without your help.

This morning I could not believe how nice my wife was to me, she went out of her way to be extra nice. I did make a point of telling her last night that dressing was as far as I was going, I will not transistion and I have no intention of living full time as a woman. Here again, the slow easy approach was the way to go and I'm sure she believes me.

Thanks again for all the help, this forum is the greatest.

Renyta

[kellycan27]

Awesome. Sounds like she didn't even bat an eye. Good for you. take it slow on the follow-up. and congrats!

[Sammy777]

I did make a point of telling her last night that dressing was as far as I was going, I will not transistion and I have no intention of living full time as a woman.

That was a good thing to do and keep the subject out there for discussion.


This morning I could not believe how nice my wife was to me, she went out of her way to be extra nice.

Uh oh.........
I could be wrong, and hope I am,
But from what I have seen/read on here that "extra nice" could just be the calm before the storm.

Keep talking and tread lightly.

[Samantha B L]

I'm glad for you that all that worked out Renyta. I've never been married but I had a GG girlfreind for 35 years of my life who was my SO and when I told her I dress she accepted it. Which was a big releif for me. So I can imagine this is all very liberating for you. Always be very respectful of her and understand not all GG's are accepting the way she's being. Buy her dinner or maybe the BOTH of you could go shopping. And realize too,that she's not just a hostess and a sounding board for TG/TS/CD stuff and there will be times when SHE is the star and not you.

[newcd]

something about that seems a little too easy.

I agree it seemed a lil to easy but you never know we could be wrong but anyways congradulations