When did you know you were going to transition?

[Super Amanda]

I've been coming out to everyone I know, and things are going fine. My question is to you girls (or guys!) that are full time. When did you know that transition was inevitable? I mean, I have always wanted to transition, but I thought I never would have the courage. I also thought I would NEVER come out . Now that I'm coming out, I feel like transition may actually be a possibility for me. I think maybe in the next 3 to 5 years I may end up going full time. Now transitioning seems so much more realistic, where it once seemed like a fantasy. I have a unique opportunity here to try out some 24/7 Amanda time, about 2 months, but I need my whole house to understand a bit more, before I let them see more of Amanda.

So when did you know transitioning was for sure the way to go? I'm just curious, as I have come to understand that each one of our scenarios are very different. Just looking for some other perspectives. Thanks

[Sharon]

I fully transitioned on October 1, 2006, the same day I moved into my new house. It just seemed like an opportune time to do so -- in other words, I had no more excuses -- and my family and friends were already aware of everything. It had only been in those last couple months beforehand that I decided to do this, although I had been hoping to muster the courage for a couple years or so.

[Kimberly Marie Kelly]

I've come to the realization that I'm going to transition, my journey is about to start. I go to see a Dr.Osborne for counseling in two days and I will be telling her that I am seeking HRT and would like a recommendation letter. I would hope she agree's and would provide the letter and that I could be on hormones within 6 month's or less.

Where I'm going to for counseling can be found at this link http://drchristinemcginn.com/ look under the counseling link. If anyone has gone to this center before, please give me your opinions of the services and the people. I'd really appreciate the feedback. :battingeyelashes:

[Anna the Dub]

I am hoping to transition in the next year or so. I am on HRT and have had an orchidectomy. I want to do it, have wanted to do it for a long time, but I have to muster up the courage and the confidence. With each day that passes I am moving closer and closer. Things that I was afraid of a year ago, I don't care at all about now. But I haven't reached the stage where I can just go for it. Some days it all seems so insurmountable, other days I am raring to go.

[Raquel June]

The whole idea of transitioning seemed basically impossible to me at first, but I still thought about it a lot, and it stressed me out. But then I just decided I wasn't going to worry about the rules of transition or what being full-time meant, and I was just going to do what I was comfortable with and do it when I was comfortable doing it. That's made me feel a lot better, and had actually caused me to make a lot more progress. Oddly enough, I find myself following a pretty standard transition. I'm on HRT, and I'm getting laser, and my hair's turning into a big long mess.

So I never really had a revelation that I know where I'm going, but things are certainly going in one direction and I can't see them ever going back the other way. I've always been obsessed about my hair and at this point I know I could never get another guy haircut again, and that makes me feel pretty good.

[tori-e]

For me transition was a slow evolution and over time it just happened. When I first came out to people I was living as a woman for a few hours a week. A year later I was 100%, except for work. It just didn’t make sense for me to not transition completely. So my company laid out a plan for me to transition with the least possible grief to all involved. That was over a year and a half ago and I've never looked back.

Take your time, take small steps, watch your progress and watch how others are responding and coping.

If it is any help, a lot of this is documented on my website: http://members.shaw.ca/terribreeze/TransMessage.htm

Terri

[marie354]

I always hoped to make the change one day, but my career and family was a big blocker.
Since I retired, for medical reasons, in 2001-2002, I began re-thinking... So, in Aug, 2007, after many discussions with friends, family, and therapists, I finally decided to begin my journey.
I still not on HRT, but one of the requirements is living as your desired gender, so that's where I started.
It's been about a year & a half now and I have no regrets.
After a few more tests, I hope to be eligible for HRT. So far, things are looking good. Medication, diet, & exercise seems to have helped a lot.
Keeping my fingers crossed. (I'll know for sure in June.)
It may seem like a long time to wait, but hey, were talking about the rest of my life here.
:)

[Diane24]

I was already in "full time" mode for at least several months when my therapist asked me if I was ready to enter my transition phase. I said that I thought I was... after all, I was on my hormone regimine and everything seemed just wonderful! There wasn't much else to do except maybe tell a few folks. So, it seemed more like any other day, except maybe the sun was brighter and I held my head up higher! And. . . I was committed to an SRS date! That was exciting and scary! (I've always been afraid of the hospital thing!) But, here I am, over 10 years later, happy as can be, healthy. . . and a woman!
Love,
Diane

[Lisa Golightly]

When my Dad died the reality of my life was exposed as being a total waste... I was nearly 40 and I'd yet to start actually living... Life seemed suddenly too short to keep doing nothing and eventually die having wasted all my years being someone I just couldn't be...

[Jena11]

Well, I was alwasy really wanting to but not sure that I could actually be able to do it. I got approval for Hormones and was going to see how I felt after the first couple of months and that I could turn back at that time if I needed to. Well to my great surprize I was feeling better than I had ever been in my entire life and It gave me the confidence to just keep at it. I had told more of my friends and then planned the going out time finaly. It went great and my close friends had told some others and then I found out that they told her family at Thanksgiving after I had left there house. Everyone was supportive of me and wanted me to come dressed however I wanted for Christmas, I was somewhat nervouse at first but then I just felt like I was actually being me for once. The day after that I decided that I was only going to be seen in my personal life as a woman. I have. the only challenge I have is that one of my close firends we work for the same company and I am not out at work yet but she is ok with everything, She is getting a divorce and we are moving in together in a few weeks, Just friends and that works for us. I just found good news about my companies process for changing genders and it is really great, It just confirmed that I will be able to move forward without too many fears. I think one of my orginal road blocks was that I did not think that I would look femine enough or feel comfortable enough unless I had certain surgeries and now those things are just bonus and I am way more comfortable going out and about as a woman than going to work as a man or doing anything in male mode.

[GypsyKaren]

It was about a year and a half before my surgery, Kat and I were sitting on a sand dune by the beach enjoying a bottle of wine, and something just clicked inside me. I turned to her and said that I have to go full time now and move forward, and she said "I know, go for it."

Karen :g2:

[carolinoakland]

The day that I realized that I could no longer pretend to be a crossdressing male. I wanted to be a woman, there's a thread that someone posted a link to a story called
"so you want to be a t girl"? That is really loooong. But it's the most realistic description of the realities of being a TS. There's a part about how you think one thing and then suddenly this 'bell' goes off and your off to the races. In pumps no less. If someone knows the link I'd appreciate it. Carol

[Frances]

http://www.mtftransition.com/t-girl.htm

[Carole Cross]

I first wanted to transition when I was sixteen, but after being caught dressed and not having the courage to speak out, I decided to try and live as a guy. Over the past few years the feelings have grown stronger and after my cousin died last year, aged 41, I decided I couldn't live a lie any longer, and decided that the only way I could end this misery was to transition and at least be happy for the rest of my life. There is no other option.
I am not yet full time, but I hope to be by the end of this year.

[Frances]

It has evolved very, very slowly for me as well. I have been seeing the gender clinic at the Montreal General Hospital off and on for 14 years. At first, I wanted them to cure me, but that did not work, and I fell into a deep depression that lasted years. Finally, three years ago, I went back to them and asked for help with no goal or objective in mind.

I started group and individual therapy. I was very distraught when first meeting transsexual women in the group. I would look at them, and it would all seem so impossible. My fears, my body and facial hair and other imagined cages were preventing me from believing that I could be like them one day.

The progression was incredibly slow. After 18 months of therapy, I overcame my depression enough to be accepted in the sexual reassignment program, which meant another 8 months of therapy before being eligible for hormones and two years before getting the go-ahead for SRS. Actually, 8 months was not enough for me; I did not ask for hormones for another two years. I also spent an incredible amount of money on hair removal, and spent more and more of my life as a woman socially (I found great support groups in Montreal).

In all this time, I began to realize that my transition had begun without me knowing it. People started to call me ma'am even when I thought I was presenting as male. One day, while waiting for my therapy appointment, the therapist opened her door to the waiting room and realized that she had double booked the time slot. The other person in the waiting room (a man) said that the lady should go first (I was dressed in one of my regular Gap man's shirt). My therapist was very surprised that I had been perceived as female, but it was a regular occurrence for me by that point.

I have been doing a lot of things over the years, like hair removal, therapy and meeting other transsexuals, which have helped me overcome my fears. I used to walk down the street looking at people's eyes to search for disapproval or hatred. The day that I stopped doing that and simply felt comfortable is the when my transition may have started for real.

[tori-e]

I used to walk down the street looking at people's eyes to search for disapproval or hatred. The day that I stopped doing that and simply felt comfortable is the when my transition may have started for real.

Absolutely agree. Although I don’t know if it was a day or just a gradual letting go of that awkward feeling.


I have been seeing the gender clinic at the Montreal General Hospital off and on for 14 years. At first, I wanted them to cure me, but that did not work, and I fell into a deep depression that lasted years. Finally, three years ago, I went back to them and asked for help with no goal or objective in mind.

This is funny. I did a similar thing. I went to the Gender Clinic at Vancouver General in the late 80’s. After a while I stopped going. I think mainly because I couldn’t believe that I could ever pull it off and that it was all crazy. Instead I buried it for another 15 years thinking I could just put it away. Every day it drove me insane.

So grateful to be past all that

Terri

[SirTrey]

The thing that held me back the most was having kids....I felt that I had them, and they deserved a life growing up that was about THEM, not about having a transsexual parent...so I waited until my younger son graduated and started college and then came out...life transitioned for more than a year...then started T....I've been on T for over a year now and have never felt better in my life....finally, I am just me....and it was worth the wait....but you do look back sometimes and regret the "wasted time"....at least I do....It cost me a lot to transition, my kids are supportive, but my mother has the rest of my family convinced that they are better off without me (saves a lot of social embarrasment and having to explain it to people)....sadly, I am not alone....so I guess I would say that there is nothing in the world like being able to live your life in the correct gender....but sometimes there is a heavy price to pay for it....not always, though....I know a lot of people have supportive families and friends...just depends on your own circle of people, I guess....We have the right to be who we are....it's just a "trans fact of life" that the world as a whole does not understand us....and that makes our journey a lot harder....but....inner peace and contentment is the prize....and it's worth it. Good Luck....:hugs: **Trey**

[Suzy Harrison]

It was only after my first flight as a female (May last year) that I started to realise I could possibly live and pass as a female in the world.

Within just a few days of that, I decided I wanted to go ahead whatever the costs.

As it turned out everything just fell into place - although I was very precise in my planning.

Now, I'm on HRT, out to my friends and family and work collegues and will go full time in early May.

I then plan to have surgery one year later.

[Raquel June]

The thing that held me back the most was having kids....I felt that I had them, and they deserved a life growing up that was about THEM, not about having a transsexual parent...so I waited until my younger son graduated and started college and then came out...

I have sooo much respect for people who can truly put their kids first like that. And obviously it wasn't just an excuse for not having the guts to come out!

So many of you are so much stronger than I am. But I'm doing what I can, it's juts going kinda slow. As long as I'm doing something it gives me some direction/peace/whatever.

[Joann Smith]

I realized that i was not going to live the rest of my life in a male role when i turned 18 ...I had been crossdressing since i was 7 or 8 and figured i would grow out it. So when i found myself dressed in female clothes on my 18 birthday it dawned on me that growing out of it was not gonna happen. And what ever it was that was driving me to express myself in a femminate fashion was not subsiding with age ...it was actually getting stronger as i got older. And with this being the case i figured by the time i got to be middle age I knew that i was just going to become a girl...This was somthing that just was gonna happen and there was not a damm thing i could do about it....Know mind you I knew nothing of GID...or ..Transistioning ..or that such a thing even exisisted let lone that there was other that felt as i did at the time. I figured that it was somthing wrong with me and some how i was born messed up because even thought i looked like a boy and had boy parts I seriously did not feel like one or what people told me i was suppose to be feeling... I tried to tell people in my family that i was not right ..but thay just ignored me or just blew it off ...except my big brother ...he tried to beat it out of me ..lol only thing that did was improve my ability to take a punch...still felt liked femminate things. Mom made me go to an all male high school..That did not work either ...started wearing my nails long and braiding my hair in class...

I think many of us would have knew we were gonna transistion a long time ago ...If we would have known what transistioning was ...


I do not know ....That may make sense to those of us us who got outfits that are older than the internet.

Joann