How hard is your line between Girl and Boy?

[Megan_Okana]

The other day I (Megan) was doing the laundry. I was sorting out the colors and going though pockets to make sure I wasn't gong to washing anything that didn't need to get wet. In the pocket of a pair of jeans I found a half eaten candy bar, receipts and four pockets of hot sauce. I though Eww, Boys are so nasty. Then it occurred to me that I had done that myself.

Another time I (Megan) was going out side to have a cig and my shoes were up stairs. Not wanting to go up to get them I put on Bob's shoes and i just got that grossed out feeling, that I was standing in something very dirty. These are the shoes I wear on a daily basis but to Megan they are icky.

I guess I make a rather hard distinction between the two worlds. Does this happen to anyone else or is it just me?

[Karren H]

Mines all blurrie.. Half the time I look like a girl in a male suit or a guy in a dress.. Mix and match.. I wear guy things out enfemme and makeup in drab.. Makes life more interesting..

[MissConstrued]

Who's Bob?

[Megan_Okana]

Who's Bob?

My Male mode

[sissystephanie]

Since I don't wear makeup or a wig, I guess I just blur things like Karren. I may be dressed totally enfemme, but put on guy shoes to get the mail! No biggie!

[pamela_a]

Who said I have a male side??? Lies, all lies.

-Paula-

[Rachel Morley]

A hard distinction between the two worlds? .... err no, not for me. My world is always a feminine one, it just varies in it's intensity. I don't do "guy-guy" only "girly-guy" or "girly-girl". I try to feminize my boy self as much as I can get away with. Obviously I have to "boy-up" a little more for work but outside of work ..... :D

[Elise.Matei]

The other day I (Megan) was doing the laundry. I was sorting out the colors and going though pockets to make sure I wasn't gong to washing anything that didn't need to get wet. In the pocket of a pair of jeans I found a half eaten candy bar, receipts and four pockets of hot sauce. I though Eww, Boys are so nasty. Then it occurred to me that I had done that myself.

Another time I (Megan) was going out side to have a cig and my shoes were up stairs. Not wanting to go up to get them I put on Bob's shoes and i just got that grossed out feeling, that I was standing in something very dirty. These are the shoes I wear on a daily basis but to Megan they are icky.

I guess I make a rather hard distinction between the two worlds. Does this happen to anyone else or is it just me?

I know EXACTLY what you mean, Megan. I have been repressed by my male side all of my life, but now regularly come out, most evenings, all night and before leaving for work - and all weekend day and night, of late.

I have kinda caused problems by unintentionally sneaking out in the daytime in front of others, by a brief girly gesture or a bit too high of a voice when surprised about something or trying to make a point. This could cause us problems and I don't want to blow it and get into a position where I am imprisoned again like forEVer so I really have to watch it. My guy side has been very generous though he now knows its a losing battle and he has all but conceded. He defers to me more and more, actually. Which is what kinda worries me. Its nice to be in control though - and when I have to stay in the background during the day, I notice he is not as uptight or stressed since pretty much relinquishing control to me. THAT is actually better for our health... to be calm and not so frenetically driven to "succeed" at all costs.

Oddly... women are so much more interested in him now that I have calmed him down and femmed him up a bit. Which is really amazing to him and very stimulating to me because I am a lesbian, actually.

[Persephone]

A hard distinction between the two worlds? .... err no, not for me. My world is always a feminine one, it just varies in it's intensity. I don't do "guy-guy" only "girly-guy" or "girly-girl". I try to feminize my boy self as much as I can get away with. Obviously I have to "boy-up" a little more for work but outside of work ..... :D

:iagree: Blurry line, although using a hard distinction seems to work for describing the differences. Some might say that explaining the two personnae's characteristics is stereotypical, but I know that most of the time I do feel different when "He" takes over.

Persephone is the real 24/7 tennant in this body, pretty much always regardless of what I'm wearing or doing. "He" breaks out on occassion and has some anti-feminine habits that I think "He" really exerts in an attempt to drive me into the background. For example, "He" will eat candy even when I'm trying hard not to.

No, it isn't really multiple personalities, but sometimes it almost feels that way.

Does that make any sense?

[GaleWarning]

I am me, no matter how I am dressed.
No difference.
Androgynous in temprement.

[tinachristina]

In front of my mom , I never exhibited any girly signs even though she knows about me . We have a dont talk dont tell thing among us.

With my wife its a different story. I can act whatever I am without any fuss and there is no need for any made up act or supression.

Other than that in public my wife told me that I walked like a women and held my wrist in backward slanted way even when I am a guy. Since then I corrected this and now when I am a guy I am confident and when a girl sexy but only in front of her. I dont go outside as Tina.
But yes sometimes we may not be too careful and give out signs.

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

My female and male sides are fairly separate. My mannerisms and even emotions differ depending on which mode I'm in. I think the mannerisms change is important - walking like a woman when I'm at the office in guy-mode would likely lead to a lot of trouble for me, if you know what I mean... not to mention I'd just feel really weird behaving like that because I look like a guy.

Much of my thought process is the same no matter how I am, even if the emotions differ. As Gabe, my emotions are on the shallow side, whereas Gabrielle has a tendency to be very emotional and sensitive. Actually, I believe myself to simply be a very emotional person, but in guy-mode, I've just learned how to shut down that part and/or ignore feelings like that. An emotional guy doesn't exactly fit and blend well in society and we all know how important it is to blend.

So aside from the differences in appearance, I'd say the line is pretty clear between male and female modes in my life.

[Senban]

I don't have a male-mode and a female-mode. I just have a me-mode. I'm the same person whatever I'm wearing and wherever I am (80:20 female to male so I usually think of myself as a girl with tomboyish tendencies).

[Tina_N]

Me? I don't have a 'guy' mode or a 'femme' mode. I have a 'me' mode. I, like a lot of others here, are a mix of both worlds. It's what makes us who we are. What's a challenge is to allow yourself to show who we really are. Too often we are inhibited by what we think society expects of the gender we portray. Aughhh!

What I see as an opportunity for you, Megan, is to blend both of your modes. At least take the opportunity to soften up (and clean) those things about your 'guy' mode you found so disgusting.

Tina

[Adrianna_Sofia]

Mine's well defined too...He (my guy mode) does the work and I enjoy being ME...:daydreaming:

[Teri Jean]

Yep, there is a point where I have to be totally dressed even if I just have to go out for a few minutes.

Keli

[jackieo]

Its a little hard some time to remember witch side of the DMZ I'm on.LOL My wife has to remind me quite often.:slap:

[JeanneF]

My line seems to get more blurred by the day. Even when I'm in boy mode, my appearance seems to be skewing more girl.

[Kate Simmons]

The only difference for myself is the choice of outfit.:)

[Prissy Linda]

I don't have a very hard line between male and female mode. The way I walk and act is usually gender neutral so it's not that difficult to make the switch from male mode to femme mode. The way I dress isn't gender specific either.

[sometimes_miss]

I am me, no matter how I am dressed.
No difference.
Androgynous in temprement.

Same here. Though, I'm careful not to do anything overly feminine when in public, working in a field where many would presume I'm gay unless proven otherwise. Seeing as I'm no longer married, and have no kids, or any girlfriend since my divorce, I try to be very, very careful.

[MissConstrued]

All this brings me to a question.

Are that many of you really delusional and schizophrenic?

Or are you just pretending to be, because it's how you needlessly justify what you do?




Let's see now... people will think I'm strange if I'm a guy wearing women's clothes... I know! I'll split myself in half, and refer to both halves in the third person! Yeah! Then no one will think I'm a freak! That's normal!

Is that the thought process?

[Warbender]

I have no line. I am a human being. And Every human being be you a genetic guy, or girl. You will have differing levels of yin/yang within your being. Like I love to say. I am who I am. The way I am, and as I am. (Subject to change without notice) :D

Without the female part of my being. I am not a whole being. I have accepted it, and actually enjoy submerging myself in my feminen side for what time I am allowed to, and every time I can. I feel more.... Centered...Better able to handle anything that life chooses to throw at me.

Line? What line? There HAS to be a LINE?

[CharleneT]

Let's see now... people will think I'm strange if I'm a guy wearing women's clothes... I know! I'll split myself in half, and refer to both halves in the third person! Yeah! Then no one will think I'm a freak! That's normal!

Is that the thought process?

Good observation ! I belong to a Tri-Ess group and I have noticed that a lot of the ladies refer to themselves in the third person ... which can get a little strange !! I can't say I understand it.

To answer the question of the thread, I do have a "line" and when in drab I do tend to be a lot more "male" and visa versa for "enfemme". There are aspects of my more feminine side that are leaking over into the male mode though. Over time, my guess is that they will merge a lot.

[Persephone]

All this brings me to a question. Are that many of you really delusional and schizophrenic? Or are you just pretending to be, because it's how you needlessly justify what you do? Let's see now... people will think I'm strange if I'm a guy wearing women's clothes... I know! I'll split myself in half, and refer to both halves in the third person! Yeah! Then no one will think I'm a freak! That's normal!
Is that the thought process?

I suspect that we grope with it because most languages, including English, really don't seem have a handy vocabulary set for our particular gender configuration.

Perhaps we need to create our own words to describe how we feel as, to the best of my knowledge, appropriate terminology seems in short supply.

I like Jackieo's DMZ concept and suggest that we somehow include it in our evolving paradigm.

[Elise.Matei]

I have no line. I am a human being. And Every human being be you a genetic guy, or girl. You will have differing levels of yin/yang within your being. Like I love to say. I am who I am. The way I am, and as I am. (Subject to change without notice) :D

Without the female part of my being. I am not a whole being. I have accepted it, and actually enjoy submerging myself in my feminine side for what time I am allowed to, and every time I can. I feel more.... Centered...Better able to handle anything that life chooses to throw at me.

Line? What line? There HAS to be a LINE?

Awesome Idea WB!!! Inspiring! Insightful!


http://img22.imageshack.us/img22/2223/gaussrev.png

I agree... all men have a female side and all women have a male side. Yin and Yang. It's a question of varying proportion and as for everything else in this world there is variability: the two extremes at either end, and a spectrum of possibilities between the two, that rises to the average mean. It's a Gaussian distribution of sexual identification. Most men have a predominantly male side and most women have a predominantly female side. THIS is what society holds up as the IDEAL - whats expected. And there are sanctions if you stray too far on either side. For men, there is the extreme manly man, macho to the max, beyond alpha male, a killer by instinct. Then there is the opposite extreme, which is what we represent, some more than others. Those in whom there is 90+% identification with their feminine side will probably have surgery. The rest of us caught in between, will dress and gesture, prance and primp, cry and sometimes die from the dilemma of being both ways - living somewhere between heaven and hell, we are the tortured ones. We are not ALLOWED to blend our femme and male natures into one person if that results in a hybrid form that exceeds a femme quality... mmmmm.... I'm guessing, greater than a 35% female / 65% male mix. And so yes! In order to avoid being mis-stereotyped as gay we are as one, split into two. Showing the male side, suppressing the female side when we are at work or just about our business in the neighborhood. Not because we WANT to be this way but because we HAVE to - or suffer what will be rather severe socioeconomic consequences, in most cases.


http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/4082/normalr.jpg

So no. Of course we are not schizophrenic, and not exhibiting "multiple personalities" as described in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition (DSM-IV) published by the American Psychiatric Association. But we are split, nonetheless. To be split is to not be whole. To not be integrated is to be fractured. True happiness, like a river, flows in a Zen like manner, following the lines of least resistance. But NO. WE have to climb mountains, hurtle obstacles, always aware, always vigilant always "en guard!" with ourselves. Sometimes we hate ourselves. We weren't born this way. We simply ARE. As is anyone. THEY can be true to their inner self. WE are relegated to the dark shadows of lonely nights, painful yearnings, unrequited loves, self-denial, and eternal imprisonment. Hungry, naked and alone behind these walls of ignorance, we steel our hearts away, withering and wilting in a life that spans too short for amends, a night too long to unbend..... that which we are. We were born into a world where the sun never quite rises. A world that is for us a forever twilight. Filled with guilt and regret for crimes we did not commit, sins we cannot admit... At these crossroads we stand and at these crossroads we stay. We are the night and the light. We are the Twilight and the gloom . We are the oppressed. Suspended between heaven and hell, we are the loveless ones. Both angel and demon, we are mortal and immortal. A perfect expression of something inexpressible. Closer to the axis of the Tao then either poles, I guess it's what one would expect, here, at the intersection of both extremes. We know too little of heaven, and too much of hell. There's a battle going on, outside and in. Who will save us? When will it end? I fear we were born to suffer. Through steely blue, forest green, golden brown and ebony black eyes of unearthly beauty... we look out at this alien, loveless world. Cursed with a heart in need of full expression, yet forever held in-check... we are as strangers in a strange land.


http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/940/yinyangsmr.png

[TJ Tresa]

Nope this never bothers me, I switch back and forth so much. Sometimes I forget what I have on and have to remind myself who I am displaying at that moment

[pickles]

I've started calling my little girl side Pickles and my guy side Eric. It really helps me accept my desires. When I want to dress up as a fairy ballerina it's not me, it's Pickles that wants to!

Me and Pickles are working on becoming one person again. We'll get there, won't we? Yes.

[ReineD]

And so yes! In order to avoid being mis-stereotyped as gay we are as one, split into two. Showing the male side, suppressing the female side when we are at work or just about our business in the neighborhood. Not because we WANT to be this way but because we HAVE to - or suffer what will be rather severe socioeconomic consequences, in most cases.

To not be integrated is to be fractured. Sometimes we hate ourselves. There's a battle going on, outside and in.

If you do identify with both genders, then there would also be acceptance of both? Why do you suffer so much? Is there a way you can learn to enjoy yourself whether you are expressing either mode?

There is a great thread (IMO) about Integration (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=103621). The insight from the CDers who have achieved it is amazing. There are also some awesome posts that may help you understand why it is difficult to achieve and this may help you to increase your own acceptance of yourself?
:hugs:

[Crysten]

Yes, the girl in me is definitely straining to get out. Sometimes it's a struggle, even in guy mode, to control the feminine mannerisms. This wasn't an issue until last summer - we sent our son to the east coast to stay with his grandparents for 6 weeks, and WHAMO!! Out came the female wardrobe. Was dressed all six weeks when not at work (wife is tolerant). I noticed during that six weeks that manerisms that were always strictly repressed (aparently unconciously) were starting to break free, and it was kinda shocking. Now, it's a struggle to confine my feminine attributes to appropriate times - it seems to be some sort of rabbit hole, not sure where the bottom is =). Probably not a bad thing, as I seem to be uncovering exactly who I am (which has been an open question for me since I was maybe 5 years old). WILL THE REAL ME PLEASE STEP FORWARD!!!

[Jenniferpl]

blurred for me. With teenagers around though I have to be carefull.

[Kathleen Grace]

I've experienced this dilemma while being drab, male me.

I'm called Miss or Mame in drab quite often. That's strictly from looks. I have a deep voice and I'm not effeminate whatsoever. My wife gets a big laugh out of it when it happens but she's sweet to never correct the person. I've played along on occasion, really so the person isn't embarrassed by the mistake. Also, I really enjoy it when that happens. :heehee:

Now, I'm guessing that places me straight down the middle gender wise. My inner self. The way I think and feel is that way too. I think "male" most of the time, the exception would be when I'm shopping or on this website. :) How I feel is "female". How I perceive and react to people and the world around me is mostly female. I like to look at beautiful things and prefer bright colors. I can usually correctly discern the emotional states of others. Also I'll remember what someone was wearing in detail. If I hear upsetting news or my feelings get hurt I may get teary-eyed. My male emotional state is dominant in regards to sexual desires and necessary aggression. In a fight or flight situation I'll fight first, fly later.

So, I guess I'm a mixed bag or blend as some have said. ;) What do you think?

[Kimberly Marie Kelly]

wearing feminine blouses, pants and makeup without wig or forms at work and mixed at home and about. I'd say very blurred, nor a very defined line at all. Hoping to transition and make the line disappear with Kimberly being left standing. :battingeyelashes:

[Dalece]

I have been more female. even at work I try to hide her but she slips out a little after work I'm all girl off with the male uniform and on with a dress. When i do have to go male mood I feel uncomfortable and miserable. But in female mood I'm walking on air.

[Tasha McIntyre]

I don't think I have developed a girly side yet.....not sure whether I will either. My CDing has been such a secret to the world for so long that if I did have any girly tendencies they have been severely repressed.

Now that the wife knows and is really good about it, Tash can begin to develop her own personality. When I am fully done up with make up and hair theres nothing better than trying on lots of different dresses, brushing my hair and touching up my make up :daydreaming: Can't bring myself to watch days of our lives though :lol:. It's still sports TV and bourbon all the way (after breakfast of course).

Cheers

Tash :)

[Byanca]

I dont have a girly side or boy side. Although I dress as a girl I dont consider myself to have a gender. So I guess it is just me.

[SusanMarie]

There is no line. He is her and she is him.

[Elise.Matei]

If you do identify with both genders, then there would also be acceptance of both? Why do you suffer so much? Is there a way you can learn to enjoy yourself whether you are expressing either mode?

There is a great thread (IMO) about Integration (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=103621). The insight from the CDers who have achieved it is amazing. There are also some awesome posts that may help you understand why it is difficult to achieve and this may help you to increase your own acceptance of yourself?
:hugs:

Thank you Reine. I'll check it out. I gotta say... the presence of your beauty, undeniably soulful depth and genuine femininity is jolting.


Fidelity ~ Regina Spektor

(Shake it up)

I never loved nobody fully
Always one foot on the ground
And by protecting my heart truly
I got lost in the sounds
I hear in my mind
All these voices
I hear in my mind all of these words
I hear in my mind all of this music

And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
And it breaks my heart
It breaks my heart

And suppose I never ever met you
Suppose we never fell in love
Suppose I never ever let you kiss me so sweet and so soft
Suppose I never ever saw you
Suppose we never ever called
Suppose I kept on singing love songs just to break my own fall
Just to break my fall
Just to break my fall
Break my fall
Break my fall

All my friends say that of course its gonna get better
Gonna get better
Better better better better
Better better better

I never love nobody fully
Always one foot on the ground
And by protecting by heart truly
I got lost
In the sounds
I hear in my mind
All these voices
I hear in my mind all these words
I hear in my mind
All this music
And it breaks my heart
It breaks my heart

I hear in my mind all of these voices
I hear in my mind all of these words
I hear in my mind all of this music

Breaks my
Heart
Breaks my heart


http://img7.imageshack.us/img7/9810/begintohope.jpg

(thanks for the hugs)

[Leslie Mary S]

I have never really thought about a line between my genders.
I am just me, when I am she I a me. When I am he then I am he.
Daughter says that my male mode is very feminine. Strange I never thought of myself as a feminist male.

Wonders never cease.

[VeronicaMoonlit]

Are that many of you really delusional and schizophrenic?

No, I don't think so. It's just that we, as a culture, lack words.



Let's see now... people will think I'm strange if I'm a guy wearing women's clothes... I know! I'll split myself in half, and refer to both halves in the third person! Yeah! Then no one will think I'm a freak! That's normal!

Is that the thought process?

Hell if I know, Veronica doesn't get the third person thing. Veronica refers to herself as "I". "I did this" "I bought this lipstick for me." "I went out en femme" rather than "Veronica went out"

Veronica
Rondelle (Ron) Rogers Jr.

[Adrianna_Sofia]

Hmmm...made me contemplate...I see the point that it could be dual personality which is a psych condish...Hmmm...Probably the better way to describe it is not to describe the line but to describe how I see myself...A slight alteration from how Eddie Izzard defines his..."I'm a LIPSTICK lesbian trapped in a man's body...:daydreaming:"

[Sarah...]

There's no dividing line for me. Even when I was in denial there was no dividing line because I worked very, very hard to display a highly masculine presentation of myself (brought about by incessant bullying at school because of my femininity). It was when I realised that working that hard to survive day to day was nonsense that things changed for the better. Now I exist and behave in the way that feels natural and those who know me recognise an innate femininity. Those who don't know me but see me in passing recognise something out of the ordinary - I see it in their faces - but in a fleeting event they aren't sure what it is they see. And there is still no dividing line. Which is important because it doesn't seem to matter what I wear, I'm still a woman.

Curiously, I feel a lot less self-conscious when presenting as a woman than as a man. I think that's because the relational aspect is the most important thing for me. I need people to relate to me as a woman because it feels right. People relating to me as a man feels so ridiculous that it leaves me upset. It's a case of. "well, can't you see I'm a woman or what?". Of course it's not their fault (the people I don't know already I mean) because they can't yet see I'm a woman because apart from mannerisms and behaviour I look like a man. All that remains is to complete my transition and then my visual aspect will mostly match my personality.

Sarah...

[Senban]

Katie B said - "And there was I thinking it was the loving, compassionate, sensitive guy called Jesus that western society holds up as the ideal..."

Well given that numbers of followers of Christianity are crashing so hard that even the BBC (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7970393.stm)hardly covers religious programming any more, I'd say your argument is flawed. Please don't assume that everyone in western society holds your religious views because we don't.

Society's views of the ideal man are far more influenced by television and movies than by religion and they're more likely to look like Bruce Willis et al than Jesus. Sorry about that.

[Carole Cross]

At the moment I keep my male and female side separate, but in about 1 year from now my male side will cease to exist and I will be Carole 24/7 for the rest of my life. I will no longer have to live the lie that my male life has been for the last 25 years, I just didn't have the confidence to come out before and it is something I will regret but I cant turn back the clock. :sad:

[kimmy p]

I'm just me. Kimmy is just a name that I use for convienence when shopping with my wife. My real name is androgynous depending on the spelling, and that's my personality. 50/50 boy-girl. Fish, hunt, fight, fart, make up, panties, bra, corset. I am what I am and that's all that I am.

[Lori A]

Who's Bob?

you know, BOB... Belly Over Belt

[kellycan27]

I dumped my male side a few years ago....Now it's just kelly.

[jenniferTgurl]

[QUOTE=Megan_Okana;1662118]The other day I (Megan) was doing the laundry. I was sorting out the colors and going though pockets to make sure I wasn't gong to washing anything that didn't need to get wet. In the pocket of a pair of jeans I found a half eaten candy bar, receipts and four pockets of hot sauce. I though Eww, Boys are so nasty. Then it occurred to me that I had done that myself.

Another time I (Megan) was going out side to have a cig and my shoes were up stairs. Not wanting to go up to get them I put on Bob's shoes and i just got that grossed out feeling, that I was standing in something very dirty. These are the shoes I wear on a daily basis but to Megan they are icky.

I understand perfectly! Richard (my real male name) and Jennifer are like 2 totally different people. We have different personalities, as well as different likes and dislikes.

[MssHyde]

I found out the voices in my head, Seem to be just me.:heehee:

[PetiteTonya]

I discovered I was Transgendered only 7 months ago. I discovered this rather late in life, having never experienced any urges at a young age involving crossdressing.

My first foray into the world Transgendered was also my first night as one. I went out in public that first night and I will never forget it. Since then, I have been to bars, clubs, restaurants, the mall, the library, out for groceries just to name a few.

I won't pretend that this has been easy. In fact, there are times where I do indeed tend to blur things, but for me, I can only say that having a strong demarcation line between me and him is not only necessary for practical reasons, but also very necessary for my own psycological well being.

I'm new to all of this. I have much to learn and perhaps over time, things will change but for now, keeping the two people that inhabit this body separate, gives me the balance I need.

I have more clothes than he does, more shoes, lots of makeup, several weaves and am still shopping and enjoying myself. I live part time as a woman now and will likely always do so. I will never purge, but even though my development has been rather accelerated, I do not intend to live full time.

I still enjoy both sides of ME...or US...:daydreaming:

[battybattybats]

My male and female aspects blur across and I spend most of the time somewhere in the middle. But not at the exact centre, there is a large amount of room between the extremes. and I tend to keep moving about.

[juneW]

I don't exactly have a "male" and "female" personality. Like a lot of people, I'm sort of the same person 24/7. But, I have to admit, my voice changes, I smile a little bit more easily, and all the little movements I make with my hands and feet become more calm and quick whenever I'm en femme.

So, even though they aren't totally different people, my "boy half" and "girl half" aren't exactly the same person, either. And I guess this makes me happy.

[kathrynjanos]

The other day I (Megan) was doing the laundry. I was sorting out the colors and going though pockets to make sure I wasn't gong to washing anything that didn't need to get wet. In the pocket of a pair of jeans I found a half eaten candy bar, receipts and four pockets of hot sauce. I though Eww, Boys are so nasty. Then it occurred to me that I had done that myself.

Another time I (Megan) was going out side to have a cig and my shoes were up stairs. Not wanting to go up to get them I put on Bob's shoes and i just got that grossed out feeling, that I was standing in something very dirty. These are the shoes I wear on a daily basis but to Megan they are icky.

I guess I make a rather hard distinction between the two worlds. Does this happen to anyone else or is it just me?

Start by answering one at a time.

Ok, crap in pockets, I've done that, but as a matter of habit, I empty my pockets before taking them off.

Shoes, well, my shoes gross me out too. My heels don't, but I think that has something to do with not wearing them outside. I don't think that I'll decide them to be gross just because they're mine. I'm a bit of a germophobe, so don't count this as being confirmed.

I think maybe in my case it has to do with not being public, or it could just be that I'm not so sensitive to the divide. But it's a very interesting question to see how people respond.

[charlie]

The male side and the female side are all one. Both are just me. It is a transition though. One that gets me in trouble at times.

[Michelia]

Mines all blurrie.. Half the time I look like a girl in a male suit or a guy in a dress.. Mix and match.. I wear guy things out enfemme and makeup in drab.. Makes life more interesting..


I am not there yet, but it seems as if that seems my destiny.

Now, if I could only look half as good as you, Karren.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

When I am JoAnne, I cannot stand the thought of wearing any of my male

garb - it just does not feel right


JoAnne Wheeler

[2b.Lauren]

Like others have said my lines are very blurry. Keeps me guessing.

[Ralph]

Let's see now... people will think I'm strange if I'm a guy wearing women's clothes... I know! I'll split myself in half, and refer to both halves in the third person! Yeah! Then no one will think I'm a freak! That's normal!
Is that the thought process?

Best. Post. Ever.

I believe the philosopher Popeye put it best when he said "I yam what I yam". Putting on a dress doesn't make me act any differently than I do when I'm wearing jeans I bought in the men's department at Wal-Mart. Why would it? Clothes don't change my brain patterns or neural responses.

ralph, still chuckling

[TrekGirl1701]

Best. Post. Ever.

I believe the philosopher Popeye put it best when he said "I yam what I yam". Putting on a dress doesn't make me act any differently than I do when I'm wearing jeans I bought in the men's department at Wal-Mart. Why would it? Clothes don't change my brain patterns or neural responses.

ralph, still chuckling

That's what I believe, too. And that's why I've never given myself a girl's name. I use the name my parents gave me regardless of what I'm wearing.

When I first joined this site I came here for support to help me find out who I was and what I wanted out of crossdressing. I wasn't sure whether to refer to myself as a girl or a boy so I just included Girl in my user name. But now, while I am physically a male, mentally I have aspects of both genders and I don't believe that one supersedes the other.