Advice on coming out and...

[ashleyinwpb]

Coming out to "The boys". My SO, she is totally is supportive about it. I dress as a mix between male and female. Sometimes more one way than the other. I'm 28 and run in a pretty republican young professional circle ie:Rotary, young professional groups,charity boards etc...I know there will be some throw back but there are members of the gay community tin all of them. I'm getting to the point that I don't care. I am tired of sneaking around and hiding in the shadows..I want to be able to wear cute clothes and open toed shoes with my toes painted.Thank you for your time..

[Karren H]

I'd say the "throw back" will be more if a tar and feathering even in West Palm... Republicans even yuppy ones don't take kindly to male members who wear dresses....

[Lorileah]

go for it. :) I am sure there are even Libertarians here maybe even a few whigs.( we won't mention ages). This community runs the gamut of styles. Wear what you think will look good.

We won't mention "comfortable" vs. sexy ;)

[Karren H]

Maybe in liberal Denver!!!

[Sheila]

hun i would think long and hard before coming out, I know that it may seem like a dream but the repurcussions could be huge, and once out there will be no going back .... crazy as it seems homosexuals are more widely accepted than Crossdressers .. it may be because it is more defined in black and white the sexuality aspect of it, but gender dress switching can confuse a lot of peeps .. maybe not right we know but it is how it is.:hugs:

Good luck in your decision:hugs:

[TSchapes]

I would never tie someone's tolerance to their political background. I have a friend who's a died in the wool Republican, but when I told him about Tracy he was very respectful and said thank you for trusting him with this information.

The way I have told people at work is one at a time or in small groups. I did not show up one day as Tracy and declare "Here I am!"

In fact I had two male friends at work where we went to lunch together every day. I took them out and bought them lunch and told them about Tracy. And to head off any pictures in their heads like "Frankenfurter", I had a couple of pictures of Tracy to show them. It went really well.

The only reason I said "had" two friends, is one moved to California, but when he comes back, we still have lunch. In other words, I did not loose a friend. In fact I must say our bond is much closer.

One of the reasons I encourage girls on the board here to come out are because of my own positive reactions I have received from people. :thumbsup:

Love, Tracy

[Sherry-Stephanie]

I guess it's like playing baseball....you'll swing and miss on some and make a hit on others and on some occassions knock it out of the park...in the end if your batting .300 your doing good....

In other words some will be accpeting some absolutely against it and most won't care one way or the other....you'll just have ot decide to what level your willing to go....

[ashleyinwpb]

I know staying in the closet is not where I want to be now & especially this year end. I'm going to come out. I'm not sure if I want to do it before our wedding in Nov. My SO is 100% supportive of whichever way I want to do it. Its coming its just a matter of how...does anyone have any stories or blurbs on how they did it?

[JoAnne Wheeler]

Go for it IF you don't care about be ostracized, criticised, demonized,

demoralized. I truly understand being caught up in the pink fog, but you

better think about the consequences.


JoAnne Wheeler

[Sapphire]

Ashley,

I would suggest that you ask yourself how many transgendered individuals you personally know of who have come out and found acceptance in your community. If you know of none, are you prepared to be the first?

[kimberly ann487]

Forget about the GOP. I'm scared to death if any of my liberal Democrat friends should find out. LOL:eek

:love:KIM:

[PetiteTonya]

I am convinced that very few people I know would ever accept me if I came out. It has only been 7 months since I discovered I was a TG and I have and do go out publicly quite often, but to come out to family and/or friends would likely have serious ramifications.

We are the least understood I think and also not well tolerated or accepted. Gay and Lesbians had to fight for years through activism etc. to gain the level of acceptance they have today and we all know that that acceptance is variable.

I'll be "out" as often as I please, just not to friends and family.

[Kelli Michelle]

Of course there could be serious consequences. I bet Ashley knows this. One does get very, very tired of hiding all the time, though----way tired of it. I imagine for her, it's worth the potential problems to be free. I can certainly understand that.

I am reminded about our fellow GLBT friends (the G & L parts).
If they only worried about about the consequences, most would never have come out, then where would we be??? A lot further away from where we are now, I am sure.

Society will be influenced more positively if we quit hiding in the shadows. Obviously this is one decision that each TG person must make.

Good luck and godspeed.

[ashleyinwpb]

Kelli its nice that someone finally sees where I am coming from...This won't be easy but I'm ready to "represent yo". Its not going to happen tomorrow but this year will be a liberating year for me...who is in?

[Edyta_C]

I see where you are coming from and I don't like sitting at home and hiding if some one comes to the house. But I don't want to lose my job and professional respect. My current job probably can't fire me but even if you can stay, you might find it less than optimal. It WILL be a trade off between your feelings and your need to have a job etc. My advise is take ti sloowly! You might try it on one or two friends and see how it goes.

Edy

[Michelia]

Ashley,

If you are single, can afford to relocate and start a new life somewhere else, you can take the chance.

It is hard to get advice and to give it on such an issue. We are all over the place in terms of how we perceive the world perceives us.

A year ago, I never ever dreamed I would ever go out of the house enfemme. Somehow, I am now starting too feel as if totally coming out one day may not be so impossible. But my kids and SO are on board. My friends are pretty liberal. I already lost my job, so I do not have to worry about that.

I will not give you advice about what to do.

I can only tell you are still so young and you should live your life to the fullest being who you are. This applies to all of your life, not just CDing. The world is changing faster than most of us realize. If I could just take some time back, I would do so many things differently. Do not be afraid to live, Ashley. Realize you can get burned but never forget you can always come back. Better and smarter and stronger. This is the way to really live. There really is little to be afraid of...