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View Full Version : Parents, loved ones and you?



Byanca
03-31-2009, 07:27 PM
I wonder how have you behaved with your parents? And how have they behaved with you regarding CD?

edit-to personal

Edyta_C
03-31-2009, 08:23 PM
It is a difficult position to be in. I was raised for my first 5 years as a girl, mostly because my Mom wanted a girl really bad. When my younger brother was born (the five year mark), he was blind at birth. My parents felt that they were to blame because of me. I was liking being a girl (more or less). Now I had to switch. My Mom often sort of allowed me to go back, even though if Dad found out it would be hard on her and harder on me. Once I moved away, I tried to go back (to being a girl) but couldn't stand the constant jibes, threats, etc.

So back to being a part time girl. The stress of not letting Edy out to play caused me to have health problems. So I can see your problem. I went through a drug phase and a booze phase, probably like you. I think you have to either leave them and be you or something to get away from the drinking like that. It didn't do me any good!

I hope you are able to do something

Hugs Edy

kellycan27
03-31-2009, 09:00 PM
My parents hated it,dispised it, were revolted, and revulsed by it. 10 years later,my dad is dead, and my mother still refuses to aknowledge me as anything but her son, and swore that she would never utter my female name.
Although I do still see her (now and then) and speak with via the phone. She still calls me Steven and still calls me young man.
LOL

SuzanneS
03-31-2009, 09:04 PM
Maybe now is a good time to get out on your own and do what you want to do, and not care what anyone else thinks, if your parents don't like what you are, then get away from it. Life is too short to worry about what everyone thinks...(can't believe I just said that...I'm still in the closet!):o

Suzanne

kellycan27
03-31-2009, 09:24 PM
Maybe now is a good time to get out on your own and do what you want to do, and not care what anyone else thinks, if your parents don't like what you are, then get away from it. Life is too short to worry about what everyone thinks...(can't believe I just said that...I'm still in the closet!):o

Suzanne

LOL. I am on my own,job,house,car ....almost 4 years total, plus another 3 off and on while away in college.

Starling
03-31-2009, 09:36 PM
At one time not too long ago, to my shame, I persisted in calling by her male name a confused but committed transsexual woman I knew, precisely because I felt threatened in my own gender identity. I'm deeply sorry for that immoral decision now, and I won't repeat my sin. God bless every single person who is going through her (or his) own personal hell trying to balance love for family, and desire for social acceptance, with the need to live strong and true.

Lallie

Byanca
04-01-2009, 12:07 AM
I think you have to either leave them and be you or something to get away from the drinking like that. It didn't do me any good!
I dont drink often. It's just in certain situations, I can drink to much. Especially if I am at home. So it is connected to relational problems. I stay be the sea, quite far away, most of the year, since the winter is milder. It's also about 5hours drive to my nearest relative. Here I do whatever I want to. Still I need to go back from time to time, that is holding be back.

Now I have made contact with the local TG community in this city, did last year to, and they have asked if I would like to meet them. So I will do that, that should be fun. It will be the first time I meet anyone somewhat like me. This time I will answer, I've talked to them before also. But I am very chicken to actually do stuff and take initiative, I just sit around thinking about it.

Thanks everyone, kellycan27 - that is inspiring, you've actually managed to get it together. :daydreaming:

beez1717
04-01-2009, 01:58 AM
I remember being in our small vacation place all the way in Maine, for the whole summer, and feeling the need to tell my parents a few things, as I wasn't feeling quite right with myself if I didn't wear women's things all the time. So I emailed my mom that I had something important to talk to her about and that it would explain some things to her. So I put on my favorite pair of women's jeans, and a simple t shirt (didn't have any women's at the moment) and went upstairs to talk to my mom. I told her "Mom, my undies are uncomfortable." and she replied "well what would you like instead?" and I replied "well I want some panties because they are so soft and comfy" and mom replied "we can get you some soft male undies" and i replied "it isn't the same as women's undies are shaped better and its important that they are women's panties" and she said "we will see what we can do"

I then told her the pants I was wearing (she thought they were a little tight around the thighs) were actually women's jeans and that the look of them and the feel was light years better then anything for men.

And hear I am, able to do my laundry at home with my whole family, and even have my mom say to me "I'll help you fold up your clothes" sometimes, and that includes folding up my panties :)

JoAnne Wheeler
04-01-2009, 10:19 AM
My parents (now deceased) and my family would never accept my CDing

JoAnne Wheeler

Lorileah
04-01-2009, 10:42 AM
Folding panties? What a concept. Mine just end up in (2) drawers.

I know I am going to sound like an old harpy, but why keep beating around the bush. You are 31. Seems to me your hinting isn't getting you anywhere and that as you come out they accept it. Maybe take a load off their minds. I am sure they have questions they want answered also. Black out drinking cannot be good. I am sure your parents would rather have you "out" instead of "in" a morgue somewhere.

See I knew I was a hypocrite in some manner.

Byanca
04-01-2009, 11:30 AM
Black out drinking cannot be good.
was the good old times..some of the most special things I have experienced have been in this state of non existence. My body don't shut down, so it's not so bad. People dont think I am very drunk at all.lol

Sammy777
04-01-2009, 11:54 AM
Your dad may poke fun at you but that could be his way.
[I don't know, I don't know him]
Your mom seems accepting enough, even though she doesn't talk about it.
Older siblings don't seem to be reacting in a harsh way.

All in all -
It sounds like things can and will go a lot better and easier for you if you just sit them down and lay it out for them.
It looks like their actions and comments are coming from a stand point of confusion rather then disrespect or unacceptance.

If you know where you stand with what you want to do and be in would be good to tell them this so they [especially your mom] can learn when and how to address you as either him or her so that there is no longer a blurred line.