AmberDay
04-04-2009, 01:16 PM
I am fully dressed today. The last time I was fully dressed was in early December of 2006. I do wear a satin gown a couple of times a month and I do wear panties two times a week, but I haven't been 'dressed'. Wife says I crossdress everyday since I shave my legs and wear nailpolish on my toes. I disagree that isn't crossdressing, but just part of my personality.
My wife is taking the kids down to the Cincinnati Dinosaur exhibit today and they should be gone for a total of 7-8 hours. It is an hour drive just to get there, plus they are going to look around the museum, then watch an IMAX film, then get something to eat, stop by her parents, and then come back home around 8pm. (It is about 1pm right now).
The crappy thing is, is that I am supposed to go to work today. I have to leave at 3:40pm and won't get home till after 2am. I have not had an opprotunity to dress in sooooo long. With me having four kids, and a wife who is okay with me being a crossdresser, but not okay with my crossdressing, I am suffering so much anxiety. It is rare that she isn't home since she works out of the house and only leaves when I am at work.
She told me I was allowed to dress for the two hours before I go to work today, but I wasn't allowed to call off today. I am thinking about calling in anyway. I never get a chance to dress like this and want to take advantage of it. I am feeling such normalcy just looking at my blue nails typing on this keyboard, looking down at my navy womens pantsuit, my two and half inch black heels, smelling my perfume, and looking at my makeup in the mirror on the other side of the room. I love the feeling of my shoulder length wig brushing against my shoulders. It is a tough decision. My wife would go ballistic if she found out that I didn't go into today. Not only would she be mad at the loss of pay, but that I went beyond the allotted time.
I am finding it hard to come to a decision. I can't believe I am considering blatantly going against what my wife told me to do. Lol, I even considered calling off, stay dressed all day, then right around 7:30, get undressed, put my work uniform on, and then just hang out some bar or something and come home at my normal time. My work (I'm a busdriver) doesn't have a tardy policy. You are either there on time or you are absent, so I can't come in late. But, I hate calling in. I do like to work. It sucks that I may miss a day of work just so I can be normal for once. And, my wife would find out in three weeks when I get my paycheck and it is short a day of pay. Then I'll get in trouble for not listening, and also for trying to cover it up. Dang, I don't know what to do.
I talked to my wife about trying to get more time to dress, but she always points out that I chose to get married, I chose to have kids, I chose to buy a house. I have a family and I need to come to terms with it, I need to get over my crossdressing, and just enjoy the times I do get to dress. But I need more than once every two and a half years.
I am feeling so good being normal, and yet I feel the need to be responsible.
What to do, what to do.....
My wife is taking the kids down to the Cincinnati Dinosaur exhibit today and they should be gone for a total of 7-8 hours. It is an hour drive just to get there, plus they are going to look around the museum, then watch an IMAX film, then get something to eat, stop by her parents, and then come back home around 8pm. (It is about 1pm right now).
The crappy thing is, is that I am supposed to go to work today. I have to leave at 3:40pm and won't get home till after 2am. I have not had an opprotunity to dress in sooooo long. With me having four kids, and a wife who is okay with me being a crossdresser, but not okay with my crossdressing, I am suffering so much anxiety. It is rare that she isn't home since she works out of the house and only leaves when I am at work.
She told me I was allowed to dress for the two hours before I go to work today, but I wasn't allowed to call off today. I am thinking about calling in anyway. I never get a chance to dress like this and want to take advantage of it. I am feeling such normalcy just looking at my blue nails typing on this keyboard, looking down at my navy womens pantsuit, my two and half inch black heels, smelling my perfume, and looking at my makeup in the mirror on the other side of the room. I love the feeling of my shoulder length wig brushing against my shoulders. It is a tough decision. My wife would go ballistic if she found out that I didn't go into today. Not only would she be mad at the loss of pay, but that I went beyond the allotted time.
I am finding it hard to come to a decision. I can't believe I am considering blatantly going against what my wife told me to do. Lol, I even considered calling off, stay dressed all day, then right around 7:30, get undressed, put my work uniform on, and then just hang out some bar or something and come home at my normal time. My work (I'm a busdriver) doesn't have a tardy policy. You are either there on time or you are absent, so I can't come in late. But, I hate calling in. I do like to work. It sucks that I may miss a day of work just so I can be normal for once. And, my wife would find out in three weeks when I get my paycheck and it is short a day of pay. Then I'll get in trouble for not listening, and also for trying to cover it up. Dang, I don't know what to do.
I talked to my wife about trying to get more time to dress, but she always points out that I chose to get married, I chose to have kids, I chose to buy a house. I have a family and I need to come to terms with it, I need to get over my crossdressing, and just enjoy the times I do get to dress. But I need more than once every two and a half years.
I am feeling so good being normal, and yet I feel the need to be responsible.
What to do, what to do.....