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LadyMirabai
04-11-2009, 09:38 AM
Made my first slip up apparently...

I was with my grandparents for most of the day yesterday, and we had gone furniture shopping since I'm redecorating/rearranging my entire place for a more gender neutral/slightly femme look. Of course I haven't told anyone that's the motivation for doing it. But anyway, yesterday we were dropping off the stuff, and I thought I had all my femme stuff hidden, but I just noticed this morning my headbands were just lying on my desk. We were not in my computer/living room much when we stopped by, but I thought I had noticed my grandmother giving me a questioning look when we were in the room, but at the time I didn't know why and ignored it. I don't think it's enough to make her think "yep he's a CD" but I wonder if that, the fact that my place is radically transforming from male dorm room look, and the fact that I spent most of my trip to big lots looking at the flower arrangements instead of looking for a desk, which is why we were actually there, she may put two and two together. I also tested them when I was furniture shopping with a 50's style pink rocking chair that they had with joking around that I wanted that chair (as bad as I guess it is, I'm testing people I know because I want to come out to *somebody* eventually, even though I'm not ready right now), so that may be another hint.

Maybe I'm just ranting and being paranoid, but I'm a little nervous about it, should I be?

DawnRodgers
04-11-2009, 10:21 AM
Paranoia comes easily to us. It is just as likely that they thought that you had enterrtained a female visitor lately. It is usually easier to ignore these things if they happen because you never know what people are thinking until they say something. Even redecorating can be perceived from many different directions besides your feminine leaning yourself. Chill and have fun - besides id it does come out, what you may think of as negative, may be a positive. Live the way you want and don't look back.
Dawn

deja true
04-11-2009, 10:29 AM
Well,Mirabai...if they're not familiar with gender issues they would more than likely think that you were gay rather than trans. Trans is not one of the options that most vanilla folks immediately think about when they start questioning loved ones' choices in clothes or haircuts or nail length or even pink furniture!

If you think that might be the case, let it go for now...'cos, what with all the acceptance that the press and media and society (on the whole) gives gay folks these days, it's likely that they can easily come to an accomodation with that.

If they ever bring it up or even hint at bringing it up in an acceptable way, that might be the time to straighten' (no pun) 'em out (if you aren't gay, that is). It's a lot shorter jump from gay to trans, acceptance wise, than it is from college boy darling to trans, I'm thinking.

On the other hand, grandpa might be thinking that the hairbands belong to the sorority girl you had up to your place last night...and be secretly proud of you!

Your call, hunny!

;)

Christina Horton
04-11-2009, 10:46 AM
Grandparents can be more accepting then mom and Dad can. You there grand(son) and they will love you. I wanted to tell my Grandma's and Dad's but my ma made me swear not to cuz she would be embarrassed by it all.I think they would have accepted more but I will never know now. So go with you heart and hay you might find your strongest supporter there. You do what you think is right. good luck hun. :HUGS: :canada:

Billijo49504
04-11-2009, 11:42 AM
Some time those mistakes are unconciously looking to be caught. But the pink rocker, is some what of a give away.:o You might as well put a sign on the door, I CD:D ...BJ

JoAnne Wheeler
04-11-2009, 12:10 PM
That was not too bad of a slip up - we all have made worse and you probably

will too - when you get as old as I am, you just plain done care anymore

JoAnne Wheeler

Fresh_Face
04-11-2009, 12:16 PM
but I'm a little nervous about it, should I be?

Yes, I'm pretty sure your gran knows! LOL

LadyMirabai
04-11-2009, 12:46 PM
Yes, I'm pretty sure your gran knows! LOL

Hey you can't blame me for being paranoid...

But anyway, Deja I had not considered if it would be perceived as 'gay' instead. I really don't care if people think I'm gay or not but its the mis-perception that that's what it was that would be the concern here. I can't imagine people would think that, but don't know what others really think...

The paranoia's wearing off at this point, now it's just more of a laugh. Mirabai's first screwup!

GaleWarning
04-11-2009, 03:27 PM
Well, it could have been worse. I think clothing, rather than accessories, would have been a bigger give away.
Maybe she is wondering if you have a girl-friend?
Relax.

Kimberly Marie Kelly
04-11-2009, 04:11 PM
is the way I do it. I use Outlook as my email program, I have several signature's set up. All of them have pictures of Kimberly instead of my male persona, well when I reply to emails from friends they see my signature picture. They will either not notice or don't say a thing, but some friends ask who the beautiful woman is.

Well just recently I told a friend of 14 yrs that way. I sent her a birthday email, she replied with the question, "Who is the beautiful girl in the email?", so I told her everything, my crossdressing for 45+ yrs, my impending HRT, my TS status etc.. She is the first of my friends I have come out too and she is totally accepting and supportive. So much so that we are going to do a makeup session with a Mary Kay Rep she knows.

I find that when they ask the question of you they are more accepting, so I use my email to give them a chance to ask me. I can control the situation as to who I send the emails too. :battingeyelashes:

LadyMirabai
04-11-2009, 05:18 PM
is the way I do it. I use Outlook as my email program, I have several signature's set up. All of them have pictures of Kimberly instead of my male persona, well when I reply to emails from friends they see my signature picture. They will either not notice or don't say a thing, but some friends ask who the beautiful woman is.

Well just recently I told a friend of 14 yrs that way. I sent her a birthday email, she replied with the question, "Who is the beautiful girl in the email?", so I told her everything, my crossdressing for 45+ yrs, my impending HRT, my TS status etc.. She is the first of my friends I have come out too and she is totally accepting and supportive. So much so that we are going to do a makeup session with a Mary Kay Rep she knows.

I find that when they ask the question of you they are more accepting, so I use my email to give them a chance to ask me. I can control the situation as to who I send the emails too. :battingeyelashes:

Yea I do have an email and MSN for Mirabai - first way to start :)