Life changing events vs CDing?

[Teri Jean]

This may get long winded but bear with me.

Those who know me better know I started dressing off and on since puberty but really started to get more involved later in life. Five years ago I nearly lost my life to a blood infection while in the Boundry Waters Canoe Area.:eek: If it wasn't for my son-in-law litterally caring me out I would have died there, I still go each year. Then two years ago I lost my wife in a auto accident with a friend of the family.:sad:
The question is; Has any of you had life changing events that may have triggered a swelling of activity in your CDing? I know for me it did but also gave me the opportunity to expore and CD as much as I want. As many have said and experianced, absence of restrictions does afford more time to our life style.
This is something that has been running through my mind as of lately.

:hugs::love:
Keli

[curse within]

Yes I recently did, I posted a simular thread but it was deleted.

I noticed that when the 2 life changing events took place my CDing level went off the charts and lasted longer in fact I am just now after a month leveling out..

[Diane Smith]

Yes, these major events make a difference.

I had a serious medical incident about eight years ago that caused me to have one of those "life is short, better get on with it" kinds of epiphanies. I picked up the pace of my dressing, getting out and about, and shopping after that.

Just over three years ago, my mom died, leaving me her house. Dressing was a welcome distraction in the first few months, but even more, having the whole place to myself with no need to hide anything or be the least bit self-conscious about dressing at home has raised my activity to a whole new level. Diane has her own room now. I am basically full time on the weekends, as well as several hours dressed each evening. High heels are feeling "normal" now and it's my boy shoes that are uncomfortable!

- Diane

[tricia_uktv]

Definately. The death of my Father triggered me into action, and I haven't looked back since.

[Teri Jean]

Cursed, Diane,Tricia,
Thank you for responding and for your kind words. I have thought for awhile this was just a self defense mechanism for me to cope but as time went on I have come to accept the journey. I have been calmer and more aware of my feminine side of my life. As Diane, sweetheart, said it opens a door most would like to have, the freedom to dress as one wants and explore more fully your heart.
Thank you girls and hope your week goes well for you. Love and Huggs. Keli

[JuAnn]

Yes, I had a bout with cancer two years ago and survived a 15 day coma. My feminine side exploded after that and now my legs and chest are shaved, my nails are frequently painted and I wear lingerie daily.
JuAnn

[Patricia1]

My retirement has opened it up for me completely. Being able to devote so much time has liberated me & pushed me along to a place I might not be otherwise.

[StevieTV]

I believe it does have a factor. It makes you think about your life more profoundly knowing it's finite. I became a lot less concerned by how others respond to my lifestyle. It's my life not theirs.

[xAnne_Mariex]

Maybe not so much of an event, but I kinda got to the point where I was so comfortable with cding and realised that it was a big part of me that wasn't going away that I decided to just embrace it, come out to my mum and enjoy it.

[Jolene]

Maybe not so much of an event, but I kinda got to the point where I was so comfortable with cding and realised that it was a big part of me that wasn't going away that I decided to just embrace it, come out to my mum and enjoy it.

Except for coming out to my mum I am with you on this. We all find a comfort in our expression of ourselves. It is different for all of us but yet the same for all of us. :)

No one in my family would ever understand this part about me and I would never expect them. Someday a reason or situation will come up and I will have to.

[MsJanessa]

sounds like you got Lyme disease--which can be very bad---hope youre fine now

[sometimes_miss]

I think 'divorce' would be the most popular answer to this thread. Other than death or dismemberment, I think it's probably the most life changing event I know. At least it was for me. I went from Cd'ing once every few weeks for maybe a half hour, to spending days at a time dressed in girl clothes.

[Donna Marie]

Wow, Keli, you nailed it for me. In March I had a prostatectomy (cancer). After about 10 days of recovery time at my wife's house, I came back home to my own little abode. Still dribbling, wearing Depends, and feeling mighty low, I got the urge. Wow, did I ever!! All of a sudden I was dressing full time. It's been several years since I last ventured out en femme, but one day I walked out to the mailbox. Hmm, that felt nice. Did it again. One day a neighbor lady came by to see how I was doing. I was all made up and feeling pretty good about it, so I opened the door and let her in. She was great with it! We had a lovely visit. Then I went to the drug store and to a thrift shop and that went well. I've been shopping several times since, and I've sat out on my porch in full view to get some sunshine in my skirt, wig, etc. I have even taken my dog for a walk around our trail.

So yeah, baby, a major event in my life sure set me off, big time. My courage does vary - there are times when caution gets the best of me. But I definitely feel I have crossed my invisible barrier as a result of my surgery, and it feels damn good. Now if the dribbling would just stop......

[Karren H]

Ohh yeah!!! The discovery of a brain tumor 5 years ago was a shocker... And completely changed my life... And as a result my dormant crossdressing reappeared after almost 10 years.. But not because of any life changing shock... The pitutary tumor was secreting a female hormone that caused my breasts to enlarge but they also blocked testosterone.. And as soon as I started treatment.... The urge to crossdress came back with a vengence and hasn't shown many signs of slowing down..

[clive]

I've been raped, and sexually assaulted in the past. It almost seems funny that I still CD even after that. All the emotional turmoil it caused, dealing with the police, etc. It took up a lot of time, but I basically decided I wasn't going to let that ruin my life.

[2b.Lauren]

I also really agree with this thread. I have taken some inventory of many situations in my life, and can directly attribute my increased CDing as a way to offer calmness and peace to a highly chaotic existance. Difficulties with work and job security because of grant issues, as well as home life have really upset my apple cart as of late. I find that when I get time to dress I am just a better adjusted me, and can cope with life far better.

[Lorileah]

I almost feel redundant here. Keli was very helpful to me when I lost my wife a few months ago. She supported me. I know it was because we are kindred spirits.

As to changing, I can tell you that what had been a "hobby" that I indulged in for many years that my wife knew about but I didn't push it, has become a more common thing. I dress almost every night at home. As has been mentioned a million times here (ok I know that is exaggerated) it can be a stress reducer.

Many of us have been sequestered for many years. In every person's life comes a turning point. For most it isn't trauma but the realization that we are not immortal. Mid-life crises if you will. Some write songs, some do great deeds, some try sushi. We become who we have hidden for years.

When it come down to the final page of life, I want people to remember me as happy and satisfied with who I was and what I had done. You can put the foot note "he dressed like a woman...and was damn good at it."

It is attributed to Jim Morrison but "no one gets out of here alive." So live the best you can

[LindaC]

I've had a bad year.

In August, I fell and fractured my wrist, required 2 surgeries. Didn't dress at all during my recovery, to painful.

Then in December, I had surgery to remove a tumor from my middle ear. Minus ear rings, I dressed almost every day durning my recovery. I have to have another ear surgery, I"ll be going on a shopping spree in order to get ready:)

[Fancynancy]

The first thing I bought after !st wife wanted a divorce was a body briefer.I needed something to comfort me and the briefer was what I choose.Just Last week we were audited by corperate' the audit went well but when I got home I went straight for the lingerie.Fem is my comfort modeNancy

[insearchofme]

When we are stressed beyond noraml with life changing events we rush to things that being us contentment and a feeling of security. Thankfully, I really haven't had such an event but I know people who have. After a period of grieving (it doesn't have to be a death for greiving to take place, ie. a loss of a job for instance), to a one, they go back to a behavior that brings them comfort. This could be of a religious nature or excess drinking or other risky behavior.

For those of us who are gender gifited becoming engrossed with our femme self is only natural. I am sure when I will be faced with such an event I'll take comfort in my femme self. Dana will pull me through.

[Tammy298]

Well, I've been thinking about starting a thread like this, but I'm still not sure where to start or what to say.... I used to talk about this more but really haven't since being with my current wife for nearly 9 years. I've wondered whether some or any of my past directly contributes to my interest in either CDing, or my other hobby which involves being either a top or bottom (BDSM). I'm not asking, nor even want to go into the latter at this venue, but only make note of it, as it has been an important part of me for as long as CDing. I am very fortunate to have a wife who understands and accepts it all as part of me.

At age five my mother died. One of the few things I do remember very clearly, is at her funeral some of my relatives asked me if I was OK. They hadn't seen me cry, because I hadn't. I knew my mother had "left", and maybe I didn't really understand what had happened other than missing her. But I still never cried. I am sure about that because years latter different relatives confirmed my early strange behavior.

After living with our grandmother for 2 years until our father got his life back together again (I have a sister 2 yrs older), He married a lady who was a wonderful mother to both my sister and me. When I was about 12 she contracted MS. She died when I was 16. Three years latter while I was at college my father passed away after his 2nd heart attack.. While my sister and I where going through his things we found a newspaper clipping about our mothers death. She had taken her own life.

Our grandmother, who we were very close to, couldn't deal with losing her only "child" and simple gave up. Within a year she too passed away.

By the time I was in my early twenties I was involved to some extent or another, both CDing and BDSM.

I've always felt I've been dealt a pretty lousy hand and frequently ask the Lord why? Yes. I am religious, but I have somewhat of a disdain for any organized religions whose paths I've crossed.

All the above is painfully true and there are many other lesser events that I don't either the time nor mood to further discuss. Maybe this is all why I embrace CDing, since it won't leave me nor I abandon it! :2c: