Patricia1
04-20-2009, 11:58 AM
A Cross Dresser's Manifesto
Last night I found myself tossing around a bit in the small hours of the morning, troubled by some of the turns a few recent threads have taken regarding whom we “think” we are & what we think we’re “doing”, that sort of thing. Some of the thinking expressed betrayed a kind of cracker barrel philosophy and practiced armchair psychology that was somewhat less than professional.
I know who I am and what I’m doing, while maybe unknowing as to the wherefore. As a 6 year who was instinctively drawn to his mother’s bra hanging on the back of the bathroom door, compelled to putting it on and stuffing it with paper and liking the result, I was not thinking of any “ideas” about “loving’ being a woman. I simply responded to a compelling and indefinable urge to do what I did. This epiphany, if a 6 year old can have one, has been the touchstone of my dressing for the rest of my life.
My cross dressing is a behavior, not an exercise in some kind of Socratic search for truth and beauty, looking to find the ideal of “womanhood”. Behaviors of the kind in which we engage are simply expressions of whom we are, just as any behavior tells any observer something about the exhibitor. If my behavior does no harm then it has a validity which needs no defense or explanation, maybe just some light. The fault, dear Brutus, lies not in our behavior but in the eyes of the beholder.
We are gay, we are straight, we are mixed, but we are not confused as to who we are and what we are doing in that state. We may have trouble adjusting our sights to understand the truth about ourselves but we should not apologize for being the way we are anymore than you would apologize for your race, your height, your age or other things over which you have no control and about which any problems with the same are outside your care.
If you’ve come to terms with your behavior and you are self-accepting, then you are well on the way to knowing thyself. By being true to yourself, you can in no way then be false to others to the extent that others know who you are. The only proviso is that you take care to show yourself only when you want to be seen.
I do not intend to offer disrespect to any but ask the same grace from all.
Last night I found myself tossing around a bit in the small hours of the morning, troubled by some of the turns a few recent threads have taken regarding whom we “think” we are & what we think we’re “doing”, that sort of thing. Some of the thinking expressed betrayed a kind of cracker barrel philosophy and practiced armchair psychology that was somewhat less than professional.
I know who I am and what I’m doing, while maybe unknowing as to the wherefore. As a 6 year who was instinctively drawn to his mother’s bra hanging on the back of the bathroom door, compelled to putting it on and stuffing it with paper and liking the result, I was not thinking of any “ideas” about “loving’ being a woman. I simply responded to a compelling and indefinable urge to do what I did. This epiphany, if a 6 year old can have one, has been the touchstone of my dressing for the rest of my life.
My cross dressing is a behavior, not an exercise in some kind of Socratic search for truth and beauty, looking to find the ideal of “womanhood”. Behaviors of the kind in which we engage are simply expressions of whom we are, just as any behavior tells any observer something about the exhibitor. If my behavior does no harm then it has a validity which needs no defense or explanation, maybe just some light. The fault, dear Brutus, lies not in our behavior but in the eyes of the beholder.
We are gay, we are straight, we are mixed, but we are not confused as to who we are and what we are doing in that state. We may have trouble adjusting our sights to understand the truth about ourselves but we should not apologize for being the way we are anymore than you would apologize for your race, your height, your age or other things over which you have no control and about which any problems with the same are outside your care.
If you’ve come to terms with your behavior and you are self-accepting, then you are well on the way to knowing thyself. By being true to yourself, you can in no way then be false to others to the extent that others know who you are. The only proviso is that you take care to show yourself only when you want to be seen.
I do not intend to offer disrespect to any but ask the same grace from all.