an incident at our local Sizzler restaurant

[samanthaoaklandcd]

Account of an incident at our local Sizzler restaurant: the first part is written by Sammi, who was there, and the second part is by Samantha, who was the person that nearly got beaten up by a very angry man)

Sammi's account:
Hi all, Samantha, Karen (a post op friend of ours) and I (I'm Sammi: it's confusing, one of us is Sammi and the other is Samantha) went to Sizzler in Albany, (near Berkeley, about 1/2 mile north) for an Easter Sunday Brunch. 45-60 minutes later, after a wonderful meal and a nice chat, we were ready to leave.

Karen went to the restroom, then Samantha went. As Samantha was inside, two young girls came in, used the other stall and left.

I poked my head in to see if Samantha was okay (she'd been in there a bit, but was wearing press on nails for the first time, so she was taking a little extra time to fix her skirt and pantyhose after using the toilet, because the nails fell off and she was putting them back on again.)

She said she was okay, and so, I went out to wait by the door as the entry area was filling up with newly arriving customers.

Samantha comes out a few minutes later.

Behind her came a woman who had been in line when I stepped out of the restroom. Now Samantha wasn't wearing makeup, but was dressed nicely. The woman called to her son, "go tell your Daddy this here faggot was just in the restroom with his 2 daughters!"

My first thought was, "This is gonna get ugly fast." So, I said quietly to Samantha, "get in the car now." Sam did so, and I then told Karen and Samantha to lock the doors too. I started the car, and then the Dad arrived, pounding on the trunk lid. I slipped into reverse and slowly backed out (we were in a space that was blocked from pulling forward to exit), then I turned the wheel to head for the exit. Now Dad is alongside and pounding on the doors and glass. I drove out from under his hands and left the parking lot.

We drove a little ways, then stopped for fuel, since we were nearly out. While pumping the fuel, an officer stopped us and advised us that we were being accused by the people back at the restaurant of having done something in the restroom. Nothing happened, and this accusatinon was dropped within 20 minutes. Then, they changed their story, and began accusing us of attempting to run over the man (Daddy, who didn't look like he was going to invite us to the church social!) with the car.

We cooperated; gave our statements and went on our way. The officer at the station feels it won't go anywhere, but since the Man (the aggressor) is pushing to file charges, he has to complete the report. My GF (who is an assistant DA in another state), says if this hit her desk, it'd hit the dead pile in 2 mins or less as a complete non issue.

But there you go,. the evil face of prejudice can rear up anywhere.

And that this occured here in San Francisco Bay Area, the nerve center of LGBT rights, is amazing.

Proof ladies, we ALL have to be careful and vigilant for our own safety. NEVER go out dressed alone, even in a "safe" area.

Samantha's comments:
I left the restaurant, and I was out in the parking lot. This woman shouts to a tall teenage boy, "go tell your Dad this here faggot was in the bathroom with his daughters." The boy runs across the small parking lot like a flash, and then Dad comes running across the parking lot quickly. He was a slender, fairly athletic, fairly well built man, middle aged, and he looked quite angry.

I knew that he was going to attack me first and ask questions later. I was absolutely certain that a conversation was not going to happen: he was certain that a pervert had been in the bathroom with his daughters, and he was in attack mode.

I am convinced I came within a hair's breadth of getting my nose broken, and possibly worse. There were three of us, Sammi, Karen, and I, but if they had come to my defense, I think that then the man would have been attacking us, assisted by several family members. I believe in that case, all three of us would have been hurt. All three of us are middle aged. Karen and I are disabled: we can walk and move fairly normally, but we can't fight worth a darn with anyone. (Karen has some difficulty with walking, and so do I.)

It is interesting to note that this was a family group, very likely on their way home from an Easter Sunday church event. I offer no pejorative remarks about Christianity, just an observation.

It is interesting also to note that I went in the bathroom, and entered the
bathroom stall, before the small child, and her older sister, had even entered the bathroom. And, then, I left the stall after they had already left the bathroom.

So, here is this man, the "protective father," ready to beat someone up who has not even done anything inappropriate against his children.

So, I never saw the child, she never even saw me, we had no interaction whatsoever. The child, and her big sister, saw my feet under the divider between the two stalls, I suppose. The police officer told me that the woman herself said this later, while they were taking her statement at the police station. The officer said that he told her "ma'am, in that case, no crime has been committed."

So, arguably, one could say that the woman "sicced her husband on me," that is, she set her husband to fight with someone who was completely innocent, and had not even come close to even the merest, slightest appearance of doing anything wrong whatsoever.

This sounds similar to a description of a hate crime to me. The woman jumped to the conclusion that I was a "weirdo child molester crossdresser," completely without evidence of this.

One could argue that this was also analogous to someone setting a lynch mob to chase a person who has not even committed the crime.

~~~samantha~~~

[jenna_woods]

So glad every thing worked out for you, yes it could have got ugly.she was cirtanly wrong is trying to bet you girls hurn for no reason.I do as you do go intot hestall do my thing and leave,

[Miranda09]

Glad your safe. This is the unknown factor that always creeps in with people.

[Jacquilynne]

Wow, that is scary!! agreed. we must be careful that is why I try to use the bathroom before I go out dressed :eek:

hope all works out and there are no further problems.

[TommiTN]

Let the creep file the police report. If he accuses either of you of any perverted acts the report will be false. Filing a false report is a felony and you can press charges and probably sue the livin' sh*t out of him.

[Kate Simmons]

Hmmm, Interesting.:thinking:

[Sally2005]

You know what?....I think I would insist on at least an appology from the man and if he doesn't appologize I would threaten to file a counter suit. In fact, the verbal abuse might even be charagable as a hate crime. At the very least make this person believe you will not back down and make sure he understands what he did is wrong.

[Lorileah]

You did the right thing to start. Insure your own safety. Beyond that I would have taken the offensive. Call 911, tell them you are under imminent danger and that you feel your life is being threatened. Lay on the horn turn the flashers on, make noise. You were on private property by the invitation of the store. You were not breaking any laws. By leaving you may have well made things more difficult for yourself (guilt by association). Good thing that the contact officer believed you.

Since this is California, I will assume (maybe incorrectly) that there is a hate crime law. You were attacked simply because of the way you were dressed and that would fall under the hate crime definition. It may still apply but it will be harder to prove now.

[Samantha B L]

Hi Samantha, I used to go into Women's restrooms all the time, even in drab. I looked sort of girly when cleanshaven when I was much,much younger and I even fell asleep in a women's restroom toilet stall once when I was 17. I was there for 10 or 15 minutes before I woke up. I stopped doing it a few years ago when I found out that in some parts of the country you can be charged as a sex offender for using the ladies room. I would certainly use the ladies again anytime if I'd been out on the town and I'd had a complete makeover to make myself passable. that would be no problem. I will point out there are a couple of towns near where I live where there are some businesses with Transgender Restrooms.

[Jessica Who]

So glad that you three were not physically harmed in any way. You showed quick thinking and expert judgment in getting out when you did. If you had hesitated in the slightest, this outcome may have been different.

I think you definitely should pursue this as a hate crime, especially given the words that fueled this confrontation. Be safe and take care.

[JulieC]

Have a look at the Bane Act, California Civil Code section 52.1. There's other criminal code that may apply, but that's a starting point perhaps. I think it's pretty obvious a crime was committed, and it wasn't you going to the bathroom.

Personally, I would NOT let this drop and thank your lucky stars something more serious didn't happen. This issue is now a matter of public record. The man/family most likely at least has your name now, if not access to your address. This situation is still dangerous.

I agree with another poster above; backing out of the parking spot with him behind you can be construed as a crime. That was a bad move. Call 911, honk your horn, flash your lights, anything and everything to draw attention to you. That said, in this situation you were in fear of your life. Even in California, the laws are considerably more lenient in such situations where you are defending your life.

[Dressing Jill]

The first thing is glad you are not hurt. The second thing is hope you learned that you can not go into the womens room.

I live in texas and that would not be as pleasant here they carry guns in texas legally.

Be very carefull

Hugs

Jill

[StevieTV]

Hmmm, Interesting.:thinking:

I agree.

[Karren H]

Oh yeah!!! Those damn steak places!! Not good at all!!. All that red meat.... High cholesterol.. You'd be better off next time and have less problems where they serve more salads I'm guessing...

[Katrina]

Glad you all made it out unscathed. These idiots don't even make sense. The woman uses the word "faggot" and thinks that *daughters* were in danger? Seriously?

[Ruth]

You're right Katrina. There was no joined-up thinking taking place. It was just pure reflex hatred of someone different. And frankly there's not much you can do about people like that except get away from them, which is what they wisely did.

[Niya W]

Go see transgenders law center .



Transgender Law Center
870 Market Street
Room 823
San Francisco, CA 94102
415-865-0176 phone
877-847-1278 fax
info@transgenderlawcenter.org

[TxKimberly]

Oh great, just when I was starting to think I was paranoid for worrying about using the ladies room! lol
That must have scared the hell out of you. I can only imagine.
Hmm . . . did he damage your car? If so, maybe you should consider filing a suite of your own.
I am indeed stunned that this happened in the San Fran area - someplace you would expect people to have a little tolerance.

[vivianann]

If it were me I would have stayed there and challenged that man when he came over there, dressed enfemme or not I would have stood up to him and if it came to blows, I would have kicked his ass, I have done that once while enfemme, the guy was bigger than me, but that did not stop me from doing what I had to do.
with that being said we need to be very careful when using the ladies room, we need to not talk to each other when in there, and if at all possible not use the ladies room unless we cannot wait to do our business.
I am glad that it all worked out in the end.

[sterling12]

Batty has posted several threads about the use of "scare tactics," by certain groups in a lot of states and localities where "gender-apparent bathroom laws" have been opposed by those groups.

We had those types of tactics used in Gainesville, and I'm guessing that your "Church People" might have been exposed to the same sort of materials. Specifically, they are telling their followers that if T-Folk use the ladies bathroom, we will be in there accosting women and molesting little girls.

It has been pointed out that these people seem to always try to instigate absolute hatred and fear among some of their feeble-minded followers. Apparently, it "motivates" the troops to get out, take action, and contribute money! In your case, it's quite possible that what we have been predicting could and would happen, almost did! You and your friends could easily have become the victims of one of these generated hate crimes.

Had anyone ever actually "connected up the dots," tracing it back to the original group who instigated these people to violence....they would have hidden behind the 1st amendment!

Your story points out an important lesson. If your going out in public, try and find some friends to go with you! It's a lot harder to take on a group. If you had been alone, could have ended up as a bloody smudge on The Floor!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Nicki B]

In the UK, this would have been classed as a hate crime (for the verbal abuse) AND as assault... Perhaps YOU should have called the police, first, for them to get witnesses?

[TGMarla]

Ew. Ugly.




Morons.

[msginaadoll]

I hope at the least you stated on the report that you felt attacked, and that you could have been seriously injured or severe damage to your vehicle. Also it is import to state that you thought that what he was saying would fall under hate crime laws. Not a bad idea to take some of the offensive as others mentioned. This individual was not acting rational so you had every right to leave.

["Mary"]

Oh yeah!!! Those damn steak places!! Not good at all!!. All that red meat.... High cholesterol.. You'd be better off next time and have less problems where they serve more salads I'm guessing...

Karen - you slay me!! You have a penchant for diffusing things. If only you had been at the Sizzler.

[battybattybats]

I'm glad you escaped.

Can you have this man charged? I think you should seriously consider it if you can!

See how quickly Transphobic/homophobic haters will resort to both violence and the law? Well at the very least we can try and use the law to protect against violence if we can.

And with the CDs-are-pedophiles bathroom lies being spread around the net radio, newspapers, on tv and even argued in legislative assemblies this is only going to get worse so long as the lies are allowed to spread unopposed.

Its a situation where those who are not active in defending us from these lies and dangers, and as I always say you can be active on this even while still closeted, are making a choice that hurts those who do leave their house dressed or are thoroughly out.

Giving in to these people by just not using the bathroom or not going out dressed is like giving in to terrorism, it encourages them. Sticking our heads in the sand and hoping the problem will go away will only allow others to get hurt.

We all need to consider that we are responsible for the safety of our community. And that being in the closet is no excuse as one can be active on the net at very least from the comfort of anonymity.

[JulieK1980]

Glad to hear you made it out! That is a scary situation, and definitely uncalled for. I agree with the others you should have called the police, but hindsight is always 20/20. I would try to press charges though, if you can.

[denise-x]

Unfotunately there are many ignorant bigots out there. And many of them can be dangerous.

When I go out I always try to find CD, TV gay friendly restaurants. They usually have unisex bathrooms. I have found several straight establishments that have unisex or family restrooms. Saves a lot of problems.

Thankfully you weren't hurt and yes if these people pursue this matter I would sue their behinds off.

[Deedee Dupree]

Well, my take on this is, when one is in the thick of it the "best" course of action can be elusive. As you were with friends you were safer and you may have not been thinking only of yourself by leaving the scene as you did.

There is no way to know how this could have escalated if you had remained in the car and called 911. If the perp was a coward he eventually may have run when he saw you were standing your ground calling the cops.

You didn't give him the opportunity to be more agressive than he already was. If he was frothing at the mouth in rage he may have picked up an object, smashed your car and possibly injured one of you whether you called the cops or not. Although you would be in the right position to litigate, would an injury to you or a friend be worth being right?

What is done is done. I think you did right, and I agree with Sally2005's idea, as a protective measure a least. I don't know you or your friends so I can not offer any advice on how to proceed.

This is a very sad story, and the guys children were subject to further re-inforcement of a hateful attitude. Pathetic. dd

[Alice Torn]

You were wise, i think, to not brawl with him. In his mind,any man inside a womens room, is sinister, and to have his precious little girls in there, well, he would beat the tar out of any male that was in the womens room, near his daughters!!! I have never had kids, but, i can imagine a father, willing to die for his daughters, if he heard that what he is sure are perverts, are in there when his daughters were, too. It is sad, that people like that family, have no understanding of CDs. To him, and many Bible believers, ALL gays, cds, Tgs, are dangerous perverts, to be avoided, and attacked. Doesn't sound like they were keeping thew golden rule. He was fine, in being concerned for his girls, but, had no self control, and should have asked HIS girls, if anyone bothered them!!!!

[Dana]

There are basic self defense moves that are easily learned and used, in a non-hostile, non-aggressive and non-injuring manner which will allow one to protect themselves which can be escalated to a higher level, dependent upon the threat level?

The "Nighty Night Bunny" will take some out and down to their knees long enough for you to take flight, as well the one and half minute strangle hold delivered with the cusp of the elbow. It will simply make them go unconscious, and will not hurt them. Both are easily to learn and to deliver. What is really require is range and practice.

With the "Night Night Bunny" blow its where you deliver it (a nerve in the neck) that's much more important than anything else. Once delivered you will literally see their lights go out. Your simply interrupting the blood flow to the brain for a couple of seconds, and send incrediable pain to the brain housing group. Its actually more effective than kneeing them in the crotch.

You need not take years and years of martial arts, but just knowing how to break the "boxer's stance" grabbing them by the lapels of their coat, kneeing them in the crotch, and slamming their heads into the nearest wall is enough.

Its all practice and technique and using their body mass against them and momentum against them. You have the advantage because they think your a "faggot" and don't know how to fight.

Thing is? A man in a dress? Is still a man! Especially if he's done twenty years in the Marine Corps!

The thing about your average guy, is they really don't know how to fight fist to fist. They're just throwing pucnhes through the air. If you know where to lay your punches as you throw them? You can take them out of the game in less than a minute. He's aiming for your stomach, your aiming for just behind his ear lobe. He's aiming for your nose, your aiming for his Adam's Apple. He's trying to give you a black eye, your aiming for his temples!

[kathrynjanos]

Sorry to open with a joke, but this is how things are going for me today:

They still have Sizzler? I thought they banned those a couple years back.

Ok, got that outta my system.

Anyway, I can't honestly say what I'd have done in that situation, but it sounds to me like you did the best thing possible, given your circumstances. I'd like to say that I'd educate the parents (mom and dad both) with a tire iron, after all, they need to learn that intolerance should be met with no mercy. FORTUNATELY, I'm sure there's video of the incident, or at least enough to ensure that you have nothing to fear. I'd see if you have any dents in your car that you can sue the ******* for, serve him right.

I'll leave alone the debate about which bathroom you should be using. There are good points to both sides, and neither one is a complete "right answer" when you have only binary options. I mean obviously you can just leave and find a place where the bathrooms are either less frequented, or individual only, but that's not a perfect solution either.

I'll sum it up by saying that I'll always do my best to scope out my situation ahead of time, and, if you didn't do that beforehand, maybe you will too the next time. If you don't have an agreeable situation for your needs, perhaps another venue is in order.

Principles say we shouldn't give in to these people, but common sense dictates that we don't want to be severely injured by their hand, either. Until the world is truly ideal, then we'll never be 100% safe in almost any situation like this.

Same warning as my other post: It's 1:45 AM for me, if I'm not coherent or if I say something you don't agree with, clarify first, flame later.

On another note, sometimes it takes a moment of brief clarity to think about or process the meaning of a word or phrase when you're so inundated with it in every day life. This is what "faggot (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matthew_Shepard)" does to our society. It's hard to imagine something with so much bile and hatred behind it can find a common place in our society today, and nobody even stops to think about it.

[goofus]

You did the right thing to start. Insure your own safety. Beyond that I would have taken the offensive. Call 911, tell them you are under imminent danger and that you feel your life is being threatened. Lay on the horn turn the flashers on, make noise. You were on private property by the invitation of the store. You were not breaking any laws. By leaving you may have well made things more difficult for yourself (guilt by association). Good thing that the contact officer believed you.

Since this is California, I will assume (maybe incorrectly) that there is a hate crime law. You were attacked simply because of the way you were dressed and that would fall under the hate crime definition. It may still apply but it will be harder to prove now.

I agree with all of the above, but still, if they thought they were in imminent danger and they couldn't fight back, they had to get out of there. I would have called 911 in the process of fleeing!

[Dana]

What's interesting about the word "faggot" is that its conotation is in reference to the 'bundled kindling" that was laid to burn homosexuals/Jews/ Protestants/ Catholics/ non-believers at the stake during medieval times during the Insertion?

[kathrynjanos]

What's interesting about the word "faggot" is that its conotation is in reference to the 'bundled kindling" that was laid to burn homosexuals/Jews/ Protestants/ Catholics/ non-believers at the stake during medieval times during the Insertion?

Something I didn't know, thank you for the history lesson. (I mean that!) :)

But it's amazing to me because I never even really stopped to consider what kind of meaning that word packs in daily life. I suppose in some ways it is good that it became so diluted by its regular use, but for some people, obviously that word is still such an easy call to violence and stupidity.

[karynspanties]

I would press charges again him if there was any damage to my car. Sheet metal is pretty thin. Dents pretty easily when someone is pounding on it. Even if it's scuffed or scratched.....I would lawyer up and see his butt in court. Make him think twice. But when you use a ladies room.....be prepared for the worst case senario. Even though you are presenting a woman, you are still a man and unfortunately, society is the way it is.

[docrobbysherry]

That our local Sizzler closed!:brolleyes:

[JulieC]

The first thing is glad you are not hurt. The second thing is hope you learned that you can not go into the womens room.

Yes, you can. I know of no state in the U.S. that has a law specifically saying a genetic male can not use a women's restroom and vice versa.

It sure as heck would be a LOT more dangerous to go into a men's room en femme.


I live in texas and that would not be as pleasant here they carry guns in texas legally.

Many states have legal carry laws. Texas isn't unique.

[Niya W]

If it were me I would have stayed there and challenged that man when he came over there, dressed enfemme or not I would have stood up to him and if it came to blows, I would have kicked his ass, I have done that once while enfemme, the guy was bigger than me, but that did not stop me from doing what I had to do.
with that being said we need to be very careful when using the ladies room, we need to not talk to each other when in there, and if at all possible not use the ladies room unless we cannot wait to do our business.
I am glad that it all worked out in the end.
Bad I ldea. With that kind of language use , its a badge of honor for those folks to beat you up. IF you are going stand up to a guy like that in front of his kids you best be prepared to kill him, cause in his mind you a child molester


Hmmm, in the eyes of the law, you're a man in the woman's restroom. In the eyes of the cops, you're a pervert in the woman's restroom. I think you'd be better off choosing your battlefields. In the 1960s my Dad had to put a little confederate flag on the car aerial when he went down to visit my Mom's relatives in Mississippi, because of the northern license plates. Old West Pioneers are the guys you find on the trail with the arrows in their backs. Civil Rights Activists were the guys with speeding tickets.

State of California she has the right to use the bath room of the gender she is dressed for .

[Persephone]

Wow, Samantha! I'm so glad y'all are O.K. Your quick thinking and quick action under the circumstances were awesome!

Thanks too for your your excellent description of what happened. Your non-judgemental analysis was amazing, especially since you were the victim! If you are not already a journalist, you should be!

I don't know how shaken by the incident you remain, but if you'd like a hug, you have one from here!

Hugs,
Persephone.

[bimini1]

You never know with these crazy cops out here you may have been the one thrown in jail.

[kimmy p]

I've seen this bathroom situation happen before. Let me tell you, the ladies don't tend to like men in the ladies bathroom no matter how we are dressed. Even my wife who accepts who and what I am has serious issues with it. What are we to do???? Search me, at least I don't have to worry about it since I don't go out.

[Carin's Wife GG]

to be kinder, compassionate and intollerant of intollarance. Thank God, NONE of my girls would have an issue with a TG person using the stall next to them....and their acceptance changes others a little at a time.


Louise.

[vivianann]

[QUOTE=niya blake;1706829]Bad I ldea. With that kind of language use , its a badge of honor for those folks to beat you up. IF you are going stand up to a guy like that in front of his kids you best be prepared to kill him, cause in his mind you a child molester

I know most peaple would suggest retreating in a situation like that, but I have been bullied too much in my life, and I have zero tolerance for that no matter the reason, and the key to winning the battle is to strike before they get a chance to hit you, I still stand behind what I say, and I have the body mass to back me up, and I am in excellent physical condition.

[Ballerina]

If it were me, I would have seen what he would have done. If he struck me, he loses and sees bars and a hospital bill, and won't look too pretty afterwards (for sure)

Glad that you all got out, though. Hopefully nothing sour comes out in the end.

Oh, double check to see if there are any damages to the vehicle. That would give a great reason to go 1 on 1 with them, and set their minds in actual sanity.

[Gingerinsa]

I think it was Kim who said she was now worried being from Texas where they can legally carry guns. Not to start this debate, but I have the training and license to carry in Texas. If I felt my life was in danger, well, better to be judged by 12 than carried by 6.

I must say I am glad you all got out of there safe given your situation and being in california where it is more difficult to legally defend yourself with force.

[Karen Francis]

Follow the usual course ov events as it makes it's way through the justice system. I am betting the DA not only won't charge your group with anything wrong, the "father" might end up charged with a hate crime, and the whole thing will stop right there.

[battybattybats]

Not everyone is skilled at fighting.
Not everyone is a good shot either.
So engaging in a contest of skill where injury or death is substantially likely when there are other courses of action is not sensible advise. That is a luxery only logical for the above-average to the elitely skilled in either pursuit.

The Transgender Day Of Rememberance has enough names on the list.

Keeping a mobile phone on hand at all times, panic alarms, where possible only going out in groups and being ready to call the police at a moments notice are all sensible precautions. I'm not saying that self-defense-training or legal weapons should not be considered but they should definately not be relied upon.

Even though the law has often been prejudiced against us (TS shot in the back from a distance considered a lesser form of 'trans-panic' murder, a driver runs over a TS repeatedly and gets convicted only of a traffic offense instead of murder etc) we need to use the system on our side as clearly those taught to hate and fear us will try and use the law and any other possible tool they can against us.

[Niya W]

I know most peaple would suggest retreating in a situation like that, but I have been bullied too much in my life, and I have zero tolerance for that no matter the reason, and the key to winning the battle is to strike before they get a chance to hit you, I still stand behind what I say, and I have the body mass to back me up, and I am in excellent physical condition.
Strike a man in front of his family epscially if he feels like he is protecting them you better be prepared to kill him. Then there is the wife. You would had to fight her and unless you have a F on the DL and SRS the cops are going to see you as a man in a dress hitting a women.

[Nicki B]

I know most peaple would suggest retreating in a situation like that, but I have been bullied too much in my life, and I have zero tolerance for that no matter the reason, and the key to winning the battle is to strike before they get a chance to hit you, I still stand behind what I say, and I have the body mass to back me up, and I am in excellent physical condition.

Do that and you may win a skirmish - but you will certainly lose the war.

You are making yourself into the aggressor, when we have a legal system designed (allegedly) to protect the weak from aggressors..


Once you decide to escalate a confrontation - you are then responsible for the hurt that ensues.

[Suzy Harrison]

Crikey - I think I'll eat at home in the future !


.... and to think TxKimme and I walked through a packed bar in Atlanta to see if we could get a reaction !

( we really did too )

[vivianann]

I would not be the aggressor, because I would not go after the man, However if he were to go after me with aggression I will defend myself, been there done that a few times, I do not like doing that, but if I must defend myself I will. There is no time to call 911 when faced with an attacker who is right there ready to hurt or kill you. I am glad that no one got hurt at the restaurant.

[TxKimberly]

Crikey - I think I'll eat at home in the future !


.... and to think TxKimme and I walked through a packed bar in Atlanta to see if we could get a reaction !

( we really did too )







You make us sound so brave! I was smarter than Suzy though - I had her walk in front. You know, sort of a human shield or canary in the mine. I figured while they were whooping her ass, I could make a clean get away!



Strike a man in front of his family epscially if he feels like he is protecting them you better be prepared to kill him. Then there is the wife. You would had to fight her and unless you have a F on the DL and SRS the cops are going to see you as a man in a dress hitting a women.

Couldn't agree more - a situation guaranteed to result in someone getting VERY badly hurt.
Nope, I think they did the right thing by leaving

[Rachel Morley]

Wow! ....all this because (maybe?) the catalyst was a frustrated, predigest, homophobic woman who had to wait in line because you seeming took to long to fix your nails!

Was her act of calling "Daddy" all about not liking to have to wait to go for a pee because of (as she viewed it) a "man" was in the ladies restroom? When I read this I see the guilty party as the one who started it. The woman waiting in line for the restroom. If she hadn't of been in line this would never of happened. What a sad world we live in :sad:

[divamissz]

People generally do not mess with me because I am 6'2" and not small-boned.

Leaving and going to your car was the best idea. You were trying to avoid a confrontation, and leave the area. That means he went out of his way to be aggressive, and you had the right to protect yourself.

Confronting him would be a bad idea. Calling 911 would have been a good idea. Leaving was the best think you could have done. You do not have to wait for the cops to arrive, though you need to let them know where you have gone to for safety so they can take a report. As long as you have a reasonable fear of imminent danger (a man beating on your car while you are in it, for instance) you are right to leave.

Now, if you feel like being a bit vindictive, take your car to a body shop and get an estimate on repairs to whatever damage he did to it. If its over $500, sue him. Yes, it'll piss him off royally, so you only do this if you really are willing to deal with his anger again and if you're willing to be outed in court.

[Suzy Harrison]

You make us sound so brave! I was smarter than Suzy though - I had her walk in front. You know, sort of a human shield or canary in the mine. I figured while they were whooping her ass, I could make a clean get away!





Yeah but I was going to kick her in the shins (to slow her down a bit) and then I'd be well away into the distance !

But afterwards, I had intended to phone her in the hospital to see how she was recovering..... yeah, I know, I'm pretty considerate like that :D

[Starling]

For those who think of San Francisco as a liberal oasis in a sea of rednecks, having grown up in "The City" I can attest that there are plenty of haters by the bay, too. And beyond the tiny, 42 square-mile peninsula that SF occupies lies a vast hinterland that contains the same mix of saints, sinners and sadists that populates the rest of America.

As I hope to go out one day, I now plan to learn self-defense as part of my feminization process.

:Punch:Lallie :heehee:

[TxKimberly]

Yeah but I was going to kick her in the shins (to slow her down a bit) and then I'd be well away into the distance !

But afterwards, I had intended to phone her in the hospital to see how she was recovering..... yeah, I know, I'm pretty considerate like that :D



Oh Puh-lease! I can outrun you in heels any day, bruised shin and all!
You know, that whole learning self defense thing is starting to sound like a good idea . . . so I can protect myself from crazy Australians . . . Crikey, isn't she a mean little Sheila? :D

[Shelly Preston]

Kim Be careful there is more than one Sheila on this forum

(Debs wont be happy)

[TxKimberly]

Kim Be careful there is more than one Sheila on this forum

(Debs wont be happy)

Opps! On the wrong side of a moderator again! . . . :D

[serinalynn]

Go see transgenders law center .



Transgender Law Center
870 Market Street
Room 823
San Francisco, CA 94102
415-865-0176 phone
877-847-1278 fax
info@transgenderlawcenter.org

Thank You Niya for posting this info.:thumbsup: :)