was asked if I would talk to a group of people to educate about cd's

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

Today, I had the best session of therapy in my life. I walked out feeling on top of the world and like that screwed up person I was so long ago had truly found my way.

My therapist (actually a prominent psychiatrist in this area) concluded today's session by asking if I'd be interested in talking/lecturing to college students, doctors in training, and others about being a crossdresser - in order to educate them about the realities. My answer was a big, fat ABSOLUTELY YES! :)

This is the same therapist who had me committed (and rightfully so) to a psychiatric hospital years ago because of my unstable, suicidal behavior. Talk about a life-turn-around.

I was under his care for more than a decade, but discontinued in 2000 because I was making no progress (read: I wasn't willing to work on my life). I never told him I was a cd then... I was too ashamed and too filled with self-hate.

After coming to this forum in January, I quickly found myself deeply affected by all the sad stories I came across. It kept me awake at night... I often cried. I went back into therapy because of this.

I made more progress in the last few months of bi-weekly sessions than I ever did in more than a decade before. Session 1 was all about explaining the realities of who I am: a crossdresser. Sessions continued focused on working on getting my emotions under control. With that accomplished, it has moved from "what do I need to work on" to "will I educate the public". Why oh why couldn't I have accomplished this years ago... so much time wasted.

I guess at least I did it, even if a bit late in life.

There are no dates set yet, it will not be immediate. There are things I need to take care of before I can speak publicly, but I look forward with much anticipation to making a difference. I'm very comfortable answering any questions people will have for me. My therapist even seemed to be prepping me for some of the tough questions before he asked if I'd be interested. He almost seemed to be trying to upset me on purpose, but I believe he was seeing if I was ready for the tough questions people may ask me. I seemed to have passed his test.

I took this gesture as something that is mutually beneficial. He is very active in the psychiatric/mental health community, and I am working hard to make a difference in how the world sees and treats transgendered people.

I don't know if there is a future (career) for me in this. I want there to be though. I'm thinking big for my long-term goals. If ever I felt a calling in life, it is this: to make a difference in this very important area. I never really knew what I wanted to be when I grew up... but I do now.

I even asked if he felt I was experiencing a mid-life crisis or anything close. He told me no and explained the difference between finding my place in life and a mid-life crisis.

Forgive me... I'm still pretty excited about this as I type. If only you knew my dark past and how far I've come, you may have written me off like so many others did. But here I am - clean bill of mental health, and even confident and impressive enough for my own psychiatrist to offer to facilitate my desire to educate people about the truth.

I may have trouble sleeping again tonight... but this time, it is out of excitement, not because I'm stressing about the suffering of others. I hope to ease that suffering by educating the public. I'm going to rip that social stigma right out of society's @ss and bury it in hell where it belongs... Ok, I'm thinking really, really big, but we all have to set our goals high, right? Who knows how much of an impact I might have with the minds and hearts I can open. :) I'm up for the challenge. It's not just who I am, it's my life. K, 'nuff with my long-winded passionate conquer the world stuff. Thanks for reading.

[Alice Green]

I always have trouble sleeping when I get excited about something, and I happy that your going to be educating people about us because understanding comes out of education than you for doing this for us.

[Juliet Simone]

Gabrielle, I am so happy for you, now that is making a difference. The role of an educator cannot be underestimated. You are awesome, and brave, and strong and determined and forward thinking, just the girl I want to be.
I think the mission of dispelling myths and awakening people to new ideas is challenging, but rewarding. There is no advancement in society without people like you to to break down the barriers to communication and do those other things you mentioned (the social stigma stuff).
Can you video tape for a public service announcement? Are you going to wear those great boots?
Ta Ta
Juliet

[Deedee Dupree]

Hi Gabrielle, Your news is extraodinary and incredibly exciting. I have presented two lectures/demonstrations in the past but not before such an "elite" audience, and I would consider an invitation to speak in front of a group like this to be quite an honor.

I was nervous at first but once I got to the question and answer part of the program I loved it. IMO, there is no better way to promote our common interests than face to face encounters either one on one or in front of a group. Perhaps with one exception, favorable widely distributed mainstream media coverage of programs like you will be presenting.

Enjoy, dd

PS. I know about the "dark ages" & pulling oneself out of hell, I didn't think I'd make it either. Cheers.

[deja true]

That's terrific and exciting news. It's just the kind of opportunity I'd jump at, too!

You're a well spoken and well-grounded person, Gabi. Nothing can come of this great adventure but good... for your listeners and for yourself!

Congratulations and good luck, dear one!

;)...:)...;)

[Michelle S]

I'm sure you will represent us well! :thumbsup::)

[Miranda09]

Outstanding Gabrielle. I'm so excited for you. I know you'll make a great representative for the CD community. Keep us updated. :)

:yrtw:

[silkandsatincd]

Hi Gabrielle,

Congratulations! It looks like all your baby steps are adding up to a giant leap! I think you would make a great spokeswoman for all of us girls. I think you are ready to conquer the world. You are so expressive in everything you write, and I would guess you would probably have no problem writing a novel or making a documentary, and who knows where this could lead?

Best Wishes Always!

[gennee]

That's wonderful news, Gabrielle.I will be talking to a group in late June about trans gender, cross dressing and Christianity. I will sharing this with the fellowship I attend bimonthly.

You are very excited and I am for you, Gabrielle. I'm so happy :) that you have come to accept and love who you are. Keep me posted.

Gennee

:hugs:

[Ediosa]

You go girl!!! Now, remember you have to represent by wearing something nice and pretty. None of those short skirts now, you hear!!!:hugs::heehee::D:battingeyelashes::bs:

:love:
Elizabeth

[Persephone]

Congratulations! I too am excited and pleased for you! Great!

[Sally2005]

One of the best ways to learn is to teach. Congratulations on finding some answers in your life.

[too scared to be me!]

thas great news!!!!!! show em all the truth girl!

[Jessica Who]

Wow, Gabrielle, that is so exciting. What a wonderful opportunity that will be for you and the students. As far as your calling, that is even better news. The more people we have out there showing the rest of the world that we're not demented freaks but normal everyday human beings the better.

[trannie T]

A friend is majoring in anthropology, she has threatened to use me as a research subject. I don't know if she will or if I'll make an appearence but it sounds like it could be quite an experience.

[Ralph]

That's great news, Gabby. You gotta REPRESENT, girl. Don't let us down. (no pressure, right)

ralph

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

Thanks for sharing in my excitement and showing support! :)

To answer a few questions:

I did end up falling asleep ok... though it took a while longer than normal. Understandable.

Yes, I'm very brave and strong... and also quite nervous about such a thing. Regardless, I'm going to have to overcome that just like I overcame everything else that has happened in my life. I believe the first talk I give will be more of a learning experience for me than anyone I am talking to. I will need to get used to talking in front of people. In guy-mode - it makes me terribly nervous (around strangers, anyway). I'm more at ease and feel really good about myself when I'm Gabrielle - perhaps that will help. :)

I have not yet decided on what to wear. Part of me wants to dress how I prefer to dress (showing plenty of leg). It would give me the opportunity to address that I dress in a manner that I feel is attractive (see my photos) and if anyone else reads further into it, it's their problem. On the other hand, perhaps a more toned down look may be better. Conquer one thing at a time - most importantly, society's acceptance and understanding the truth about crossdressers and transgendered people.

I will try to obtain a video copy of my talk - mainly so I can learn from it. Depending on how well I did (or poorly), I may or may not share it. I'm sure you understand. If I make an ass of myself - no need to show the whole world. :o

For those who have already spoken in public - good for you! :) I hope you'll continue to take the opportunity to do so again. The more people we can educate, the better it is for ALL of us. Get out and open more minds!

I will do my best to make a good impression on all who I talk with and meet. I obviously cannot represent the entire transgendered community any more than any one person can represent all of humanity. We're all so different. I can only do my best to make sure that I am a good example of the person I am. :)

It will be a few weeks before I see my therapist again. That's when I'll learn more about what opportunities are available and discuss how to proceed. I'm sure my next session(s) will revolve entirely about this topic.

Thanks again for sharing in my excitement and enthusiasm about this.

It feels as if all my hardship in life was necessary to prepare me for my journey ahead. Society has to change, and I'm going to do my part. :)

[joann07]

Congrats!
Good luck with speaking in a college class. I'm so glad to hear there are more girls going out and representing us.
I recently did one, which I am doing my write up, and it was the best experience I would love to do again and again for the benefit of ourselves and for the benefit of educating others.

Regarding advice on what to wear, my advice is to wear something business woman or business casual. Since you're a guest speaker, it would be appropriate to dress properly because not only are you representing yourself, but you are representing all your crossdressing and transgender sisters.
I know you have that urge to dress attractive and show some leg, but you have to think, would a GG do that if she was going speak in front of an audience?
There's a time to do that and there's a time where it's not appropriate and so dressing with class will give your audience a better impression of who you are.

Other than that, be yourself and be proud of who you are.


Hugs!

[Melanie R]

Gabrielle,

There is nothing that gives satisfaction like talking with a group of strangers and helping them come to understanding about our community. After the first talk you will want to repeat the experience. My wife and I do several public presentations each year and from year to year see that society is maturing related to their knowledge of transgendered persons. On Sunday we will begin our 37th Dignity cruise out of Seattle to Alaska. Our group will have 7 days and nights to educate over 2500 other passengers about what it means to cross gender lines.

[Angie G]

That's great Gabrielle you go girl. And go big hun.:hugs:
Angie

[deja true]

That's great Gabrielle you go girl. And go big hun.:hugs:
Angie

Well...don't go too big...you don't want to ruin the lines of your skirt...:heehee:!!!

[Toni_Lynn]

Gabrielle

This is great. I did this a few years ago at a few universities. It was superb. For the most part, the students where really kind and understanding. I think that there was only one at each venue that was a bit snarky. The snarkiness was not limited by gender -- it was both guys and gals. But -- again -- one in a class of 30 was not bad.

As to what to wear, I'd go for day to day stuff. Nothing special. Skirt and blouse, flats instead of heels.

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[Carola]

Hi girl: You have a huge opprtunity that a lot of us would love to have. Let me tell a story about something that was told to me; it might help you.

A congressman (i'm not into politics, he was a teacher at University) told me once that a lot of years ago, a group of homosexuals was going to the Congress to speak about their civil rights and that they didn't wanted positive discrimination; just be treated as any other person. What he (the profesor) recognized to his students was that before the meeting he and other congressmen was making child jokes about how the reunion could be, and all was amazed how professional everything went.

What i intended to say is only that if you audiencie a serious and professional, be like that; otherwise, they will just consider your words as irrelevant. You can tell them that your outfit is not what you often wear, or maybe divide your speech in two: one wearing male clothes and the other in women's. You know (as we all) that cding is really important in our lives, so try to make the understand. Indirectly you would help a lot of cds that could be treated by them in the future.

Congrats and let us know what happened there.

Good luck!!!!

[Tora]

Bravo, You will do well. The Doctor would not set you up, if you could not handle it. Report back, please.

[Laura_Stephens]

On many levels, congratulations!

[Jenny Brown]

Are you going to wear those great boots?

in the summer?:eek:

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

Regarding advice on what to wear, my advice is to wear something business woman or business casual. Since you're a guest speaker, it would be appropriate to dress properly because not only are you representing yourself, but you are representing all your crossdressing and transgender sisters.

I can't really represent all of us, but I most certainly want to put forth a positive example of a crossdresser. :) I appreciate your advice and I'm thinking along those lines as well now. I'd honestly love some attractive business attire anyway. Been on my "want it" list for a while. Now it's on my "have to get" list.


On Sunday we will begin our 37th Dignity cruise out of Seattle to Alaska. Our group will have 7 days and nights to educate over 2500 other passengers about what it means to cross gender lines.

Wow - awesome! :) That's a serious number minds to open.

I think it's great that you and your wife team up with this kind of thing and make it a regular part of your lives. Please, keep it up and keep making a difference. I hope to join the ranks and begin to open more minds myself soon. :)


...I think that there was only one at each venue that was a bit snarky. The snarkiness was not limited by gender -- it was both guys and gals.

I'm expecting some snarkiness. It's part of the game. I welcome the opportunity to address any problems people may have with who I am. The more snarky people I encounter, the more I will learn how to deal with them, and (hopefully) how to turn them, enlighten them, and open their minds. :)


Bravo, You will do well. The Doctor would not set you up, if you could not handle it. Report back, please.

I agree. Thinking back to my last session, he seemed to be testing me at times to see how I'd react. I may be nervous (when the time comes), but I am very confident in who I am and there is no confusion. Can't say I'm officially ready, but I'm going to do what must be done to get there. :)

I VERY much appreciate your show of support everyone! :) There's such a positive vibe going on here and I'm just loving it! Thank you all for that! :)

It will be a while yet before anything happens, but I'm very excited about the possibilities.

[silkandsatincd]

Hi Gabrielle,

You seem to be very good at clarifying your thoughts and feelings when you share your experiences with everyone on the board. I think that being prepared and comfortable with your material before hand will be of great help. I went through Toastmasters International over 10 years ago and earned my CTM - Competent Toast Master certification in public speaking. In order for me to obtain my CTM, I had to give 10 different speeches, most with a specific focus. In order to practice, I used to write out my speech first, then memorize it, then record it on video to rehearse until I was comfortable with it, and make improvements as I went along. As I watched myself on video, I looked for ways to add hand or body gestures to emphasize different points and added some humor at appropriate times to put my audience at ease, which helped me to relax as well. I hope this helps you too. Since my experiences in Toastmasters I have gained so much self confidence and speaking in front of groups has gotten so much easier. If you can express yourself to a group the way you do when you thoughtfully respond to a post, I'm sure you will win your audience over and receive many kind words after your speech. Visualize your success! Good Luck.

[Joy Carter]

Good for you Gabrielle. I was asked once to go the the local university and give a talk, but I'm to well known here to take such a chance.