Log in

View Full Version : Suzy Harrison – Coming out to the world



Suzy Harrison
05-09-2009, 09:21 AM
One year ago, only 1 person (outside of this forum) knew about my condition. A week ago around 50 knew – At the end of this week, this number would grow to around a 1000.

This is this the week where I will disclose my condition and plans to everyone. I don’t feel nervous, as I’ve had so long to prepare. I know I have the complete support from the company I work for and also feel others should be fine with it….. I hope !

Late on Tuesday afternoon my HR Manager, Teresa, arrives in Perth. It’s a peculiar sensation waiting for her in the arrivals lounge – as Suzy. This is something I could have never imagined just a year ago. As she comes down the escalator she see me, smiles and give a wave. Once we’re face to face we have a long hug together. So much time and planning has gone into this week and she is just excited as I am. I’m so lucky to have someone like her to help me realise my dream. We go to the hotel where she is staying which is close to where I live. Soon, after checking in, we’re having dinner, being joined with my favorite GG from work – Catriona. This is the wonderful person who has also helped me so much during this past year. This dinner tonight, marks the occasion where we draw the line between my old and new life. On Wednesday we will tell the rest of the staff in my office and on Thursday everyone else in the company - and also, all of our customers.



On the Wednesday morning Teresa and I arrive at the office. Everyone else is already there, as planned. I’m greeted by the receptionist, who gives me a card to mark the occasion, - and a hug. She, together with the two other females that work here, has known my plans for some time. Elaine (another one of the girls) has brought in a cake! – Soon after we’re sitting around a table, with the guys bewildered and wondering what is about to happen – and all the girls already knowing! Teresa starts off by saying that I have an important announcement to make – and afterwards she will answer any HR questions that there may be. So she hands over the meeting to me – and I take a deep breath and begin.

You would have thought that telling a room full of people about your most personal secret would be horrendous. But I feel calm and confident. I’ve really come so far that nothing is going to get in my way now – and certainly not nerves. I start off with a bombshell. "I have a serious genetic medical condition* - which I’ve known about since the age of 12". I now have their undivided attention. I go on to say although it’s not life threatening, it is certainly life changing. I then tell them everything - including my plans to become female. I’m studying their faces as I’m speaking and see sympathy and compassion.


As I finish, the many questions are about to begin. The first one comes from a guy that we had assessed - might - due to his background; find my situation hard to comprehend. I’m ready and expecting something difficult from him. But his question is short, simple and completely floors me. His question is; “What can we do to help you?

Soon I can see everyone else is also committed to help and support me. I am so lucky.

That cake then comes out and a party atmosphere begins. An hour later the decision is made to close the office for the afternoon, so we can all go out for lunch! This wasn’t planned for, but shows just how well everything is going. Soon we’re off to an up market restaurant for the rest of the afternoon.


Come the evening, Teresa, Catriona, Elaine and I,( by now as Suzy ), have one last meal out together – a celebration of a years planning and today’s events. During the meal Teresa tells me she has, as planned, sent an email out to the company’s staff across the rest of Australia.The plan is that her e-mail is ready in everyone’s 'in box' by the next morning. It is to introduce my plans and confirm the company’s support.

By mid morning I sent off my email to all staff ( see this ). (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=105320)

By noon on Thursday, everyone in the company had seen both of the emails. I had wondered what they would think about my situation. From the many e-mails of support I received back, I can see the general feeling is not bewilderment, but sadness for what I’ve been through since an early age and admiration for the courage needed to pursue my dreams. Since that time, Catriona has also started to tell the customers and their reponse has also been very accepting and supportive.


I have now gone on leave for a 3-week period. This is designed to give me time to settle into my new life and also time for everyone else to get use to having Suzy in their lives. At this moment I couldn’t feel happier than I do now. Everything seems to be going so well for me. In 3 weeks time I start my dream. I’m sure there are some difficult days ahead of me as I start my transition but with the support from everyone here on the forum and my friends here in Perth – I’m sure I’ll be okay.



We often wonder how others perceive our condition. We might think that many people think we are strange. But it seems the world is changing and everyone is becoming more accepting and aware of our condition.


All Done - A celebration
88239
--------------Suzy -------- Elaine --- Catriona --- Teresa --------------


By the way - Now I can tell you, the company I work for is called OLYMPUS
Not only does Olympus make cameras, we also make Medical Products used in endoscopy and key hole surgery
We all work in the medical division of Olympus



* See BBC Website: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7689007.stm

MJ
05-09-2009, 09:32 AM
Suzy i am so very happy for you. may all your dear friends bring you true happiness and all your problems be little ones :love:

Sharon
05-09-2009, 11:07 AM
It sounds like a perfect day and a wonderful company to work for, Suzy -- congratulations. :)

Kerrylee61
05-09-2009, 11:19 AM
I have nothing but admiration for your determination, and journey. It must be so so wonderful to work for an organization that is so supportive and caring. If only others were so inclined.

You must offer a great deal as an employee to your employer to be the recipient of so much support.

At long last you can really be the person you have been all along... a beautiful, intelligent woman.

I wish that I had chosen the path less traveled all those years ago because life would have been so much more serene.

Hugs and best wishes :love:

Kerry

Alana65
05-09-2009, 11:40 AM
Suzy, I'm :cry: tears of joy for you, right now. I wish you all the best in whatever the future brings during your transition, and beyond. :hugs:

CharleneT
05-09-2009, 12:29 PM
It sounds almost like a dream, you are truly blessed with a good company and great friends !! Among the many hard stories, it is nice to hear one where people rallied around the transgendered person.

By the by, I'm a professional photographer now, but when young my first 35mm was an OM-1 ( second year of production) it was my std camera for many years for copy work ( owned and wore out 5 of them ). I now use Better Light scanning backs ... I miss the simplicity of the OM-1 -- heck all basic 35mm film cameras !!

MAJESTYK
05-09-2009, 12:34 PM
Suzy, I am honestly awed by your courage! I hope that only the best and greatest things come your way! I hope that things go as well for me when I get there.....I do have to admit, it may be harder because, I aint quite as pretty a Sheila as you are ! All the best!

LisaM
05-09-2009, 12:45 PM
Suzy,

Congratulations. You seem to have put a lot of thought into your transition and it shows in how well it has gone so far.

Kimberly Marie Kelly
05-09-2009, 01:55 PM
I'm so happy that everything is going so well for you. The US headquaters of Olympus is located just 25 minutes from me. If ever in the US ring me up, as I would love to me you and talk with you.

As I start my transition process at work I will be using you as an example. Congratulations again, I'm very happy for you..:hugs::battingeyelashes:

Dressing Jill
05-09-2009, 02:04 PM
That is wonderful. Congratulation

My eyes won't stop leaking now. I feel such a joy inside for you.

Many Many Happy years to come for you.


Hugs :hugs:

Jill


There is always room for more friends in my heart :sf:



PS I own on OLYMPUS camera

Sarah...
05-09-2009, 02:43 PM
What an uplifting account of your last few days that was :) I so enjoyed reading it that I read it over again. You've got a strong base from which to move on now - and that's priceless. So, I'm raising a glass to you as I type this on the other side of the world.

Congratulations :)

Sarah xxx

Eileen
05-09-2009, 05:10 PM
Suzy you are a true inspiration! Reading your account, brought me to tears of joy! It is so wonderful to hear of a girl, who by her hard work and determination, the support of family, friends and an outstanding employer, is able to put everything together and have the wonderful outcome you have achieved.

Eileen

Suzy Harrison
05-10-2009, 08:03 AM
Thanks for your lovely replies. I'm in kind of a middle ground at the moment. I have 3 weeks off but I'm still in boy mode for the time being. I have several sessions of electrolysis coming up (4 x 2 hours a session) - and this is holding me back a little - due to the fact that I can't wear foundation and my face will swell.

But there's no rush I guess. I have those 3 weeks to gently fade from my male role to a female one. Part of me wants to just jump into it, but another part is saying take your time and gently ease into things over the time I have off.

Miranda09
05-10-2009, 08:09 AM
Suzy, congratulations. It's so nice to see you work for people who accept you for what you are....a truly terrific person. I can't tell you how happy I am for you. All the best in your new life. :)

:love::hugs:

Kristen Kelly
05-10-2009, 08:49 AM
Suzy, congratulations, I have followed your posts over the years and your progress your look is fantastic and your mindset is right on track, I wish you best of luck in taking that next big step.

Jan W
05-11-2009, 03:47 PM
Suzy,

Great story and well written as always.

Makes me glad I have an Olympus camera! I will support the brand where ever possible.

Your friends, family and your company are extraordinary. To have these people in your life is an absolute joy.

Hope your new life is all and more you wish for.

See you in Melbourne (don't forget girl!)

Love,


Jan

Starling
05-17-2009, 02:28 PM
Darling Suzy, who wouldn't want to work with, be friends with and love the vivacious and beautiful lady in that photo--in all your photos, actually? You simply blaze.

:) Lallie

debbeelee1
05-17-2009, 05:38 PM
Suzy, good luck and congratulations! Sounds like everything is going well! I hope it continues to go well for ya!

Dita_B
05-17-2009, 06:20 PM
Although we are already in close contact with each other and having followed all your strides towards this ultimate success, I still want to "officially" congratulate you here on this site!

You have done a great job in preparing by feeling out the emotions of those around you, a real Cancer trait!

You are truly an inspiration and an example for all of us who want to follow the road less traveled... I am about 6 months behind you, but I am on the same path...

I wish you lots of success in your new life, Sis!

From Canada, with lots of love,
:love:
Dita.

Sally24
05-17-2009, 06:49 PM
I am so happy for you Suzi! I'm sure everything won't be perfectly smooth but it sounds like things will go well. Congratulations on pushing ahead with your dreams, and finding some key people who have the great hearts to love and help you. :clap:

Joy Carter
05-17-2009, 07:53 PM
Thanks for sharing your journey with us Suzy. :D

Suzy Harrison
05-19-2009, 02:14 AM
Thanks for all of your kind words. It's the support that I've had from this forum that has got me through the hard times. It was only just over a year ago when my confidence started to crack and I stopped going out for a month. But the gals from here made me get back on that horse - and ride into the sunset !~

Two days ago I finally did it........ I threw away EVERY piece of male clothing I owned - I even threw my wallet out. All I have left is my female wardrobe - so I'm now 24/7 (It's either that or stay in bed all day!)

I'm loving it :love:

:hugs:Suzy, Perth, Western Australia


PS: Can't wait to get back to Atlanta in September for the SCC

DanielMacBride
05-19-2009, 02:57 AM
I'm so glad to hear everything is going so well for you, Suzy :) It will make a huge difference to have that support in your workplace, I'm so pleased for you! :)

kerrianna
05-19-2009, 03:39 AM
Hi Suzy! You look great!
I'm so happy for you. It sounds like your time has come. :hugs:

I always find one of the most amazing, and valuable, things to arise from this journey is finding out how very kind and caring people can be, and being pleasantly surprised by their reactions. :)

Suzy Harrison
05-22-2009, 07:18 AM
My Driving Licence has now come through. The good thing is in Australia (WA) the licence doesn't state male or female. It just shows my name and my photo.

Last Saturday I had my ears pierced, today I got my nails done and changed my name in my bank accounts.

My GG friend has been visiting our customers for the last two weeks and telling them of my transition. Everything was going really smoothly until this afternoon - where she told one of the nurses I know really well. The response.?.....

Well she burst into tears and was really upset. She said that I was now gone and she'd never see me again. She was shown photos of me and was told this is what I want and I'm so happy now - but it didn't console her. I never expected this to happen

pamela_a
05-22-2009, 08:09 AM
Well she burst into tears and was really upset. She said that I was now gone and she'd never see me again. She was shown photos of me and was told this is what I want and I'm so happy now - but it didn't console her. I never expected this to happen

Perhaps it's not a competely unexpected reaction from some people Suzy. If she has had a long standing relationship there may have been some emotional bond to "him". Even though you are the same person, to her "he" is gone.

-Paula-

Sally2005
05-22-2009, 12:40 PM
Suzy, I've been following your posts and I am impressed with how well your transition has gone with your work and co-workers. Its probably to be expected with some people when a sudden change happens...maybe she will come around after she sees your new look. Congratulations! I've got no plans to transition, but if it was me, I would schedule a day to burn all your male clothes! And no looking back! 3 weeks is not a long time...

Carole Cross
05-22-2009, 12:51 PM
Congrats Suzy. It sounds like you work for a greeat company who have given you their support. I wish you every success for the future and your new life. It will be some time before I am in your situation but I hope I have similar success. :hugs:

Suzy Harrison
05-22-2009, 08:17 PM
Congratulations! I've got no plans to transition, but if it was me, I would schedule a day to burn all your male clothes! And no looking back! 3 weeks is not a long time...



They've already gone Sally - in the bin and have been collected.
I only have female clothes left - a nice feeling

Deidra Cowen
05-22-2009, 10:31 PM
I have not visited the forum in a while and frankly one of the thrills is to catchup on what people are up to when I do check back in here.

Wow! you have come a long way and congrats to you sweetie. Sounds like you have really done a great job at working out things for transition.

DanielMacBride
05-22-2009, 11:05 PM
Well she burst into tears and was really upset. She said that I was now gone and she'd never see me again. She was shown photos of me and was told this is what I want and I'm so happy now - but it didn't console her. I never expected this to happen




Don't worry too much about this, Suzy - it happens, people sometimes have very strong attachments to their perceptions of you and when you change something, they can't cope with it because they had such a fixed idea of you in their head. You can't control how other people feel or how they react to your transition - that's their issue, what you need to concentrate on is doing what is right for YOU, and doing it in the best way possible :) You may find you lose a few friends along the way - but that again is their issue, if they can't handle the real you, they probably weren't worth keeping as friends anyway.

However having said that, some people will need a little time to grieve the loss of the person they thought you were - some will come back around, some may not, but in the end all you can really do is give them a little space to process it, answer their questions honestly and the rest is up to them as to how they handle it or not. Don't let it get to you - transition is not an easy road by any stretch of the imagination, and anyone who thinks it is, is delusional. There are a lot of things we have to deal with that cisgendered people neither encounter, nor understand, but the bottom line is what's right for YOU, and only you can know that and do it :)

BTW, we will have to catch up again for coffee sometime ;)

Suzy Harrison
05-23-2009, 09:23 AM
Don't worry too much about this, Suzy - it happens, people sometimes have very strong attachments to their perceptions of you and when you change something, they can't cope with it because they had such a fixed idea of you in their head. You can't control how other people feel or how they react to your transition - that's their issue, what you need to concentrate on is doing what is right for YOU, and doing it in the best way possible :) You may find you lose a few friends along the way - but that again is their issue, if they can't handle the real you, they probably weren't worth keeping as friends anyway.


BTW, we will have to catch up again for coffee sometime ;)


Hi Daniel - It's not that she doesn't want to know me anymore and I have lost a friend - She just can't take in the fact she'll never see me again. She said it was as if I had died. I think she may have had a little crush on the boy side of me - and now that is no more.

Yes we'll have to meet up again for coffee - I'll call you sometime this week

:hugs: Suzy

DanielMacBride
05-26-2009, 09:14 PM
Yeah, that's what I meant (sorry, maybe wasn't very clear, I think I needed more coffee that day LOL). She sounds like she had a very strong attachment to your male self, and is grieving what she sees as a major loss - give her time, she may well eventually realise that she hasn't lost "you" as such, because you are still the same person, just the external presentation is different. That's what I mean about people being so attached to their idea of who you are - they build up perceptions and form a kind of mental picture of who they think you are, and when you come out as trans and start to transition, that picture is shattered. Sometimes people have a hard time dealing with that because they were so convinced that their image was the reality - it may take a while for your friend to reconcile her image of you with the reality, and I think it does sound like maybe she had a bit of a crush on your male self if she is so upset about it.

But like I said, that kind of reaction is beyond your control - you are who you are, and you can't really control how others perceive that or how they react. If your friend comes around (and I hope she does, I have a feeling she might because it just sounds like there was an emotional attachment there that she needs time to grieve and put to rest), that's great - it just means that she has to kind of redefine the boundaries of how she interacts with you and her expectations of the friendship.

lari
05-26-2009, 09:39 PM
Sounds just like a birthday or at least a new a happier time for you dear, good luck

Starling
06-02-2009, 03:30 AM
...She just can't take in the fact she'll never see me again. She said it was as if I had died...

Suzy, her reaction is a testament to the affection you've inspired among your colleagues and clients. It's clear the reason your charming female self is being so welcomed now is that your charming male self was highly regarded. When she gets over the shock, she'll see that your loving core is still there.

:) Lallie