For those of us in the closet, tell us what a typical night out is like

[Nikki Welsh]

I've never been out on the town dressed as a girl, but I'd like to know what it's like. I'm not so interested in how you felt, as much as what you did and where you went. What's it like to go to a club or bar? What do you do while there? Is the whole night just drinking, talking and dancing? Is it normal to flirt? Even if you're straight and married? Do you ever find yourselves doing things you might not do sober? Which restroom do you use? Do you ever go to non-gay locations? Tell all!!

[Christina Horton]

if you want to read about my first time out then go to my page look up my thread titled "my first time out yaaaaaaa!!!!!!!" to see how I did my first time out. I also have wirten about my other adventures out. I think there what your looking for. Although I have not been out to a bar yet but I will. Enjoy. Oh post a reply and tell me what you think eh. Have fun living through us lucky girls.


So why don't you go out?

[msginaadoll]

Well I would be one of those in the closet girls. When I get out I like to go to one of the local Detroit clubs like Gigis or more often Rainbow Room. Have begun to develope a group of friends so more often than not I meet them there. We shoot pool, I do drink pop-no alcohol. Also as said chat like any other girl on a night out. I like Rainbow Room especially because it is an accepting place where I can just go to be a girl for the night. I do try to be friendly with everyone, so yes I do flirt. Am also getting out more in the community. I belong to a local group of ladies-Crossroads and so I do attend there functions when I can. Went out to a nice local restuarant, as well as to a dinner dance at local banquet hall. I like to go shopping in Ferndale- which is a supportive city nearby. I have gone out to Macys as well as JcPenney as Gina. Went out to lunch. This past winter went with friend to an erotic art exhibit. Probably the boldest thing I did was go to a local bowling alley bar for a party for people I talk to in chat room- gay/bi transgender friendly room.

[dilane]

I've never been out on the town dressed as a girl, but I'd like to know what it's like.

I first went to support group meetings. Then, with friends met there, I started going out to safe places such as the local T-friendly bar, then places in the Gay/Lesbian part of town.

As I got more confidence and experience, got rid of the facial hair, and developed my femme voice, I started going to straight venues with more experienced (and very passable) friends.

I took dance lessons, first at a gay friendly place, then at straight studio, where I was noticed, I'm sure, but treated very well by the students and teachers.

Eventually, I got confidence to go just about anywhere, although I stay out of the low-rent areas. Now I go to straight middle-aged clubs with live bands and good dancing. I've made a lot of friends, male and female who know only the Diane side of me.


What's it like to go to a club or bar? What do you do while there? Is the whole night just drinking, talking and dancing?

Breaking in a new place is hardest -- the first goal is to get to know people and make friends. That gives me confidence. It helps to be outgoing, which I am in spades (but in a quiet way, I'm not loud).

Usually I hang with my GG friends, and we chat and kibbutz about the other people, and about our lives and the week. Eventually, the men wander over, and drinks and dancing have been known to happen :)


Is it normal to flirt? Even if you're straight and married? Do you ever find yourselves doing things you might not do sober?

Only in a minor way, by being friendly. I'm not in the market, and I'm married, but do enjoy being asked to dance, especially by a good dancer. Been asked out lots of times, and I always refuse.

I've never been drunk, typically I space three drinks over 5 hours. More than that and I get sick, something I'm thankful for and I'm sure has kept me out of trouble.


Which restroom do you use?

Girls.


Do you ever go to non-gay locations? Tell all!!

That's all I go to nowadays. I'd rather go up against regular GG's my age than against the over-the-top perfect 20-something Asian T-girls at the T clubs :)

Do a search for my postings in the "Out and About" section, I've got several write ups of my evenings in there.

[Kendra08]

For me it's a lot like when I go out any other time. My very first time out I went to a restaurant with friends and then out to a gay bar. I've been to a few straight neighborhod bars dressed and they were great times. I talk with my friends, drink, played beer pong, everything I'd normally do. I don't think I act that much differently whether I'm in guy or girl mode. I'm me as Kendra or Ken and I have great friends that accept me for me and I think thats the key to feelng good while out.

[CharleneT]

I've never been out on the town dressed as a girl, but I'd like to know what it's like.

You should try it, if you are nervous, find a local Tri-Ess group or the like and go with them. Just know that when you are with a bunch of other CD's you're going to be read in a flash (just mentioning it in case that matters to you). As for what's it like, after you get used to the feeling of being out as a woman, it is the same as going out in male mode. At least for me, I do not really think about being "en femme", I just enjoy whatever I'm doing.


I'm not so interested in how you felt, as much as what you did and where you went.

First time I went out, I went to a regular strait bar to see a band and dance. Which is what I did, and I enjoyed it alot. As for the other times, sometimes I go out with other TG's, then it depends on where everyone wants to go ( a wide selection of places ), other times I go out alone and then it is almost always to strait bars to dance and socialize. I just act like me pretty much, diff being it is my feminine side. I also go out with a couple of local TS's and we tend to go anywhere and everywhere. Dinner, movies, concerts, plays, see an exhibit, etc.... just normal stuff really.


What's it like to go to a club or bar? What do you do while there?

Well, that depends on the club ! IF it's a gay club, it is pretty easy going experience. You will feel welcome, although maybe a bit ignored. If it is a regular/strait bar or club, then it is pretty much like going there in male mode.... really, if you believe you should be out there, and act accordingly, it will be quite normal.


Is the whole night just drinking, talking and dancing?

Depends ... I do not drink that much when out - regardless of mode - but that's just me. If I'm alone, I do tend to drink less than otherwise, especially if somewhere other than my home town. Just a little caution. But what I think you are asking is how do we "act". I act like me, but I do not see my feminine side as a separate character or personality. I'm pretty much all girl anyway.


Is it normal to flirt? Even if you're straight and married?

I'm single, so YouBetcha ! I do not think that your sexual orientation has anything to do with whether you flirt or not ?? Any flavor can and does flirt. If you are married or attached... well, depends a little. If it is just flirting, then probably you're fine. Just do not take it too far. Make sure the other person(s) realize you are just flirting.


Do you ever find yourselves doing things you might not do sober?

Definitely not.


Which restroom do you use?

Women's So far, haven't had problems in a women's restroom. Now if the establishment prefers I do not, I would not use the women's.


Do you ever go to non-gay locations? Tell all!!

As above, much more often than gay clubs. Gay clubs can be fun, but here in particular I'm way to old. I live in a college town and the local gay clubs are full of 20 somethings. I'm 51, they make me quite welcome, but it just isn't some thing I do a lot.

I think a lot of CD get started going out to the gay clubs because it is the safest place to try out your water wings. After you gain some confidence, you'll find that you can do a lot more than you think in public. Just do not make waves or a "scene" and you'll be fine.

Charlene

[Christina Horton]

I think a lot of CD get started going out to the gay clubs because it is the safest place to try out your water wings. After you gain some confidence, you'll find that you can do a lot more than you think in public. Just do not make waves or a "scene" and you'll be fine.

Charlene

Well I have never been to a gay club. I go shopping movies go eat e.t.c. I would love to just not had the chance. Besides clubs , most people go there late , I drive truck long haul and I normaly in bed at 10 so I get tired sooner.

It would be neat though.

[trannie T]

I've gone to support groups, both serious and social. I have gone to the cinema. I have taken the bus and street cars. I have gone to drag shows. I have gone shopping. I have gone to parties. I just wish I was a little more out of the closet.
It is your turn now Nikki, when are you going to creep out of the closet and tell us your adventures?