I don't pass but do I care what the pubic thinks....Yes and No. You say (WHAT?)

[Christina Horton]

Yes I do want to pass. :)BUT. :doh:

There have been many threads about this DUH. But my view is this.....:devil:

When I go out dressed and since I don't pass and get read all the time, I am helping the "( normal)" people see CROSSDRESSERS. If I deport myself right don't act like a pre-Madonna or a diva Bitch, I should give them a good experience with there first or second e.t.c time seeing a CD. :eek:

SO that's the way I see my ability of not passing.........:sad:

Don't get me wrong I will all way strive to look better than I did before and try to pass, I just feel that Since I don't right now WHY should I cry :cry:about not passing when I can help EDUCATE the General public out there EH. :love:

I have explained this on other threads but thought It would be a good thread of it's own. :heehee:

WHAT DO YOU GIRLS THINK, DO YOU THINK IF THE GIRLS WHOM DON'T PASS (LIKE ME) ARE HELPING OR HINDERING CD KIND!)

HUGGS :hugs: :canada:

[gennee]

I like the way you think, Christina. I go in public regularly. I pass pretty well but if i'm read, so what? Doesn't matter to me. Like you I am educating the public about CDing.

Gennee
:)

[Joy Carter]

Don't care what others think. I dress as nice as I can and act like a lady.

[Byanca]

I think it is great. The biggest problem with society of today is the dual split sex. We need 3 bathrooms, not two. I'm always so confused when I encounter those situations that I sometimes decides to not go, since none of them are for me.

[Miranda09]

As long as you're having fun and happy, what does it matter? You definitely are HELPING the CD community. Keep it up. ;)

[Joni Marie Cruz]

Hi Christina-

Passing schmassing. Thank you for posting, I don't pass either, though sometimes people don't seem to notice, which I consider just as good as. Personally I think we should all get out there (all other things being equal) and do our things. This puts me in mind of an article I read on a GLBT site about being "too gay", ie flamboyant/flaming/in your face. I'll see if I can find it and link it.

And good for you, Christina. You have more courage than lots of people and it sure seems like you have more fun, too.

Hugs...Joni Marie

Oh, here, I found the link, it was still in my inbox. It was on Plantet Out, this should go right to the article:
http://www.planetout.com/hot_topics/2009/05/is-there-such-a-thing-as-too-gay.html

[Carole Cross]

I don't pass very well and have been read many times. Fortunately, it doesen't seem to be much of a problem round here as I have only had a couple of comments directed at me. I think the best reaction is to just smile or ignore those who nock you and speak kindly to those who chose to interact respectfully with you.
Personally I don't really care about passing but will always try and do my best to act appropiately when dressed as I will be going full time within the next year tro eighteen months. :daydreaming:

[Dita_B]

WHAT DO YOU GIRLS THINK, DO YOU THINK IF THE GIRLS WHOM DON'T PASS (LIKE ME) ARE HELPING OR HINDERING CD KIND!)

HUGGS :hugs: :canada:

Hello Christina:

To give my straight answer to your question: Of course you are helping people to get used to seeing those of the "third gender" around, out and about...

IMHO most of us won't pass... Even if we work so hard at it, we'll always miss this "typical" female look, whether it is our face with masculine features that no amount of make up can hide, or in the way we carry ourselves. Frankly, when you see a girl walking in the distance, you'll know that it is a girl, even if you can't see her face ... not even with binoculars. So my point is that looking like a woman takes more than just dressing and going out... It takes a lot of studying, training and even than, we still have a male frame, don't we?

So, as far as I am concerned, it is all in the attitude you display to those observing you... If you show confidence, even while facing those who clearly read you, there is nothing coming from it but hopefully respect for your courage. I have heard that more times than I can remember from girls I get to talk to...

BTW: I love to tell those who are close enough, and when the occasion lends itself to it, that "it is really hard to be a girl"... that usually breaks the ice and I have made many GG friends in that way...

And guts is what you clearly have... If you are ever in Victoria, let me know, I'll take you out on the town and let's rattle the cage! With a bit of luck, we'll make the 6 o'clock news!

Now THAT would teach them!

Your Canadian Sister,
:love:
Dita.

[MeraLehanga]

You wear for yourself! And the lucky ones wear for the feel of it.

Correct me, where does the public comes in? They will never accept CD, out of 100 if 85 rejects you where do you stand?

You have better chances of being accepted by females, that is for sure. Just live for yourself and enjoy the feel of everything feminine, which itself is very powerful feeling.

[Kate Simmons]

In the final analysis Christina, it has to be about addressing and getting in touch with your feelings. CD kind will be there regardless my friend.:)

[Empress Lainie]

I think you have the best attitude Christina. Lucky me, I always pass and so well I worked my last job as a gg. My SO doesn't and I am sometimes asked if she is my son. Boy does she get mad!

[Jessica Who]

I love that idea, every time out is a chance to educate at least one person that has been previously misinformed

[Hali]

Christina u r doing a wonderful-brave job keep it up.

Go out and show the world what CDing is, define us, present us before somebody who doesnt like us did.

[battybattybats]

Often folks here say what everyone needs to do is go out and it'll change everyones minds. And there is some value in that. But if someone passes it changes no-ones mind at all.

Only those who are out and dont pass can change the public perception. As when a stranger meets a pasing CD they pass, so it has no education value.

So what your doing is a great thing. And it will help others be accepted.
It's not all we can do. Our community will have to own up to that and start, closeted and out, taking responsibility and becoming active in making things better.

It's those who don't pass and those brave enough to be out and those who are active on TG issues (even closeted folk) who have been making things better and who continue to make things better.

Everyone else owes their current acceptance and future acceptance to people such as yourself.

[Sarah...]

I think it's not up to other people to tell me if I pass or not. It's irrelevant. I'll tell them I'm a woman and then they get to choose whether or not to respect my choice. They have my respect in that they can choose for themselves - I ask only the same in return. :)

Sarah...

[Kate17]

I like this thread. I may have just learned something new about myself through others who have offered their thoughts. I believe I always felt that I can't go out if I do not pass ( at least in the light of day) Christina, you are getting me to ask the question - WHY? A lot of what I do as a cd is toward reaching that goal - to be accepted as a female somewhere, somehow ? As others have said, sometimes no matter what you do, you can't fool mother nature but maybe it does not matter that much in the big scheme of things. Shall we scream from the roof tops "I am cd, hear me roar" - well, maybe just a whisper for now.

Thanks for your courage

[Rachel Morley]

I agree with what's been posted so far and in particular with Batty. If you get out there but then pass so that no one notices, then you haven't really "exposed" the public, "reminded" the public (however you want to put it) that there are CDers out there amongst them and we are nothing to be feared or hated etc. We are nothing more than nice, harmless, people, it's just that we perhaps have a different lifestyle than them.

On the other side of the coin not everyone wants to "further the cause". People try to pass for lots of reasons (to try to experience what it's like to be treated like a GG by people, for fear of retribution or confrontation, if people aren't sure they not going to embarrass themselves etc etc).

So to answer your question:

WHAT DO YOU GIRLS THINK, DO YOU THINK IF THE GIRLS WHOM DON'T PASS (LIKE ME) ARE HELPING OR HINDERING CD KIND!
Definitely helping! The more times people see us out and a bout the more normal and less of an "anomaly" we will be. :)

[Carly D.]

Yes.. helping us uglies out.. actually I've said I am not sure I am actually trying to pass but rather just trying to look like someone other than myself.. kinda a disguise of sorts.. maybe trying to look like a guy cross dressing but not really trying to pass at all just a guy wearing womens clothing but not looking like me (the male self I am is having thinning hair)but rather the me I would look like with a full head of wild hair...

[Butterfly Bill]

I find many times people are turned on by the unabashed honesty when someone who is obviously a man wears women's clothes.

[Christina Horton]

I don't know if this Quote will stay here but I made another thread and I quoited it cuz I don't know how to make it a click able thing.
The thread is call "I just had a revelation about my shoulders Weird EH!!!!!!
I will post it like this and I hope the admin's will not only link it but tell me how to do that.
Or can any of you girls can help me pls do.




Ya weird EH. well I made a thread about "I don't pass but do I care what the pubic thinks....Yes and No. You say (WHAT?) " where I said I don't really care what people think about my CDing and all that when I go out dressed.

But I had this fear of going out with bear shoulders like spaghetti straps. I have very broad shoulders and I don't think they look Fem. Now remember , I Really don't care If I pass, the way I see it is if the Normals See the glory that is us CDers the more they
A) get use to it.
B) can except it better if there experience with me is truly a good one

And I think they all are, I am not a bitch when out........Yet.:devil:

Any way I was driving to my new Seamstress (whom is going to make me A cocktail dress for my 20th high school reunion,) dressed and I had this revelation, If I could care less if people know I am a cd ...... then why care about my manly shoulders.

WOW...... I blew my own mind then. I was think of this cuz I was wearing a now dress that has no sleeves and small straps.Not spaghetti straps but the normal strap that a lot of dresses and top have for summer. I normally would wear a Black shear top under to hide my shoulders.

Now I don't care if the see my manly shoulders , If there going to read me they might as well see me coming sooner. LOL<.:eek: :heehee:

Ss over the past few months I figgered out I could wear really short skirts and now I have no prob showing my shoulders. Yeppppiiiiiiiieeeeeeee!

I wish all of you could get over your fears like I am getting over mine. Now if I could lose all the weight and lose my job and actully live in My apt insted of visting the dam thing, I would allmost be in heaven. If all thoese things were done the only thing left would be a good women to fill my heasrt with love . I am glad I have never had that kind of love before cuz I whoulf then know what I was missing.

Ok girls unload........ what would you like to eather exsept about your fem falts , and maybe one of the girls here could help you fix it.

Don't be shy if you don't ask no one can help!

So now I really am on my way to really being free. I can wear anything I like and who cares is I do. Not me.






I like this thread. I may have just learned something new about myself through others who have offered their thoughts. I believe I always felt that I can't go out if I do not pass ( at least in the light of day) Christina, you are getting me to ask the question - WHY? A lot of what I do as a cd is toward reaching that goal - to be accepted as a female somewhere, somehow ? As others have said, sometimes no matter what you do, you can't fool mother nature but maybe it does not matter that much in the big scheme of things. Shall we scream from the roof tops "I am cd, hear me roar" - well, maybe just a whisper for now.

Thanks for your courage

What people say to or about youe CDing is there problume not yours. It takes' two people to make you feel bad about yourself, The jerk that make's the comment and YOU for letting him or her. SO my advice is to look at the person and smile and say thank you hun. means alot.

That will confuse them.

SO I hope this post make sence since I will be edited by the Addmin's.

Thank you all for you comments and for reading this giberish!!! LOL>:devil: