Your First Time Out

[Rachel05]

I wonder if I can ask as a closet cross dresser, who would love to go out dressed, what was your first time out like when fully dressed, where did you go and was if fully dressed including hair and make up.

Just wondering how you build up the courage to go that extra mile from cosy home to the big wide world and also did you go somewhere far from home so you wouldn't be recognised.

[Karren H]

Well I don't know if asking closeted crossdressers about how to get courage to go? Or maybe I missread that but anywho.. My foirst time was 40 years abo when I was 16... Ok 41 years ago... More stupidity than courage because getting caught would have been devistating.. But I didn't..

More recently.. 5 years ago when I got back into it.. Was basically getting bored with staying home all prettied up.. And just opened the door and went out!! And I can't tell you enough I should have done that decades earlier because its a blast out there.. Here.. :)

[Alice B]

The only chance I get to go out is when my wife is out of town, which only happens one or two times a year. I got the courage to go to a local bar "SRO" which is a local gay bar that cross dressers attend on Saturday evenings. I mustered up my strength, got fully dressed and went in full of fear. I was immediately accepted and had a great time. I've been back three more times. I had first done a lot of research, including asking others on this site that live in my area. My suggestion is to locate a local club that accepts cross dressers and go for it. You will have a fun evening.:hugs:

[Shikyo]

Can't really help you with the courage part as I went out as girl as fast as I could. I already had a long hair, so that was not an issue at all. Not to forget I was already wearing my hair in a girlie style anyway so there was no need to have that changed.

The first trip was to the nearby grocery store with my wife. Nothing special, we went in, got the stuff we needed and paid and went back home. No one looked funny at me or anything really happened. Of course, I was still rather paranoid about what was going on. What were the others thinking when they saw me, but that was all in my head. The more I went outside the more I started to understand that no one's really going to say anything. No one really cares.

The first trip was something special, it will always be. Now when I think back you just gotta laugh about how paranoid I was at that time.

[Rachel05]

Oh you make it sound sooooooooooooo easy, I have wanted to do it for ages and I have done the whole back garden thing and it feels good and I want more, like you all say, I am sure with time we are going to get there - and thank you

[Christina Horton]

Well if you want to know read my thread " http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=91079. It's long and involved but I think it's a great story. Oh tell me what you think there I always like to help Cd get out of the closet, Do you know how dangerous the dust bunnies are. I sprinted out of my closet cuz they started to pick on me unmercifully. So don't let you DM's get the better of you. You know they laugh at you behind you dresses Eh. The only way to kill them is to show them " who's the girl"

[Evie08]

I have been a member of the forum since October. Doing a lot of reading and learning here. Thanks to all who contribute. Well last night was my first night out. I was invited to go by Lisalotte. I thought, cool, someone else who has been out before to go with. Unfortunately, no photos. I was also aprehensive about going out. I went to the bar the night before in drab, just to check it out. It is "Twisted (http://www.twistedineverett.com/)" in Everett, WA. What a great place. Good music, good energy, good people.

Lisa and I are talking at the bar, and I realize it is both our first time out. Well we both had a great time. And yes were were both well dressed, hair and makeup, and heels.

[trannie T]

Pure Terror
My first time out I was absolutely terrified. I was at a hotel and went to a T friendly gay bar next door. It was on International Crossdressers Day (October 31). I had a few drinks and left before I had to use the restroom. I was afraid to speak to anyone but somehow survived the ordeal. The next time was easier and slowly I have become more relaxed while out.

[Carly D.]

My very first time out was out in the backyard at night without my wig (didn't have one yet) and it was also like November, or December so it was rather chilly.. couple months ago was just wearing some tights and shorts and my lil booties and didn't go overboard trying to pass because again it was really late at night and went for a drive and went into the local post office to get the mail which I had already gotten earlier in the day so in other words just a risky little dare type of thing.. then the big three outings when dressed up full.. no makeup but out late at night went to a town twenty miles away and got gas and was a thrilling exciting nerve wrecking but very worth while experience.. basically you have to "pick your fights" wisely which is to say stay within your comfort zone.. if you are comfortable around a lot of people then you might do fine... I have been in the closet and hiding my fem existence for my entire life so changing that feeling is tough to do.. how many people saw me dressed up?? I calculate maybe twenty.. and that is all... and that is fine with me.. I wanted to be seen, the reason for going out while dressed up is to be seen... just not an overwhelming outing..

[dilane]

First time out was when I was 30 or so. This was in the dark ages, well before the internet. I'd been dressing indoors, and had taken a couple of furtive nighttime drives, but that hardly counts.

My wife suggested that I go dressed to a Halloween party she'd been invited to. It was friends from her work, so I would know no one.

So I wore a nicely detailed brown print renaissance dress (Jessica McClintock I think), beige open toed suede pumps, long hair, and a sparkly eye-mask. Full makeup, and nails and toes done.

At my wife's suggestion, on the way we stopped off at the house of a couple we knew who lived nearby. It turns out that the guy was *very* glad to see me, hmm...

I had a ball at the party. When silent, I was taken for a woman by several people, which was very gratifying. I remember enduring some catty remarks from another cross-dressed person (french maid) who wasn't as detailed in her presentation .... maybe a bit of jealousy??

I didn't go out for several years after that, until I found a CD club in Orange County. That eventually led to making friends and getting out into the wider world.

[Sarah Doepner]

My first time out was a glorious trip from the motel room to the fender of my car and back. All about 12 seconds of sheer terror and then a half hour of self-analysis "Why did I do that? What was I thinking?" And on and on. That excursion had been preceeded by years of thinking I would go out, only to stop with my hand on the doorknob and staying in my room.

The trips got longer, some lasting up to 45 seconds at 3:00 in the morning to get ice. Yep, it was brazen to say the least.

Finally I did a half hour long trip out in public, prime time, fully dressed. In hindsight, my clothes were poorly chosen, ill-fitting and not age appropriate. My shoes hurt after a few minutes and my home-made breastforms started to leak out from under my bra. When I made it to a place where I could sit down I became parnoid that EVERYONE was looking at me and I left to return to my room. Limp, hitch up the skirt, push the form back into place, limp, hitch up the skirt . . . Back in the room I saw my make up was overdone and my hair was out of place. But I was safe and absolutely thrilled by the experience.

I decided then to either give it up or get better prepared. I chose the second and now I'm better prepared and go out with fewer second thoughts and more comfortable shoes. That first trip out the door to the fender of the car was probably 3 or 4 years before the first long trip and 5 or 6 years before I could go out with some sense of confidence.

I still have second thoughts and still wonder why I'm doing what I do. But I do it anyway.

[Christina Horton]

how many people saw me dressed up?? I calculate maybe twenty.. and that is all... and that is fine with me.. I wanted to be seen, the reason for going out while dressed up is to be seen... just not an overwhelming outing..

I can't count high enough on how many people saw me the first time out. I got my makeover at the mall , so there you go.

[Jaclyn NM]

The first time I went out fully dressed, with makeup, wig, dress, heels, etc. was nineteen years ago, and I honestly don't know what I was thinking. But it went very well, and in the end just increased my desire to do it more often, which unfortunately I'm not able to do. But if you've never done it before, give it a shot. I guarentee you, it will be exhilarating.

[vikki2020]

It's not exactly how I got up the courage to go out. I was about 15 or so, and the urge to go out was so overwhelming, I pretty much had no other choice!:daydreaming: Ahhhhh, the good old days-- at 15, I could do my make-up in 5 minutes!:devil:

[TerriM]

My first time out was in 1977. I heard about monthly CD parties that were taking place about 25miles away in a private hse. Prior to that I just dressed at home alone. I was kind of scared but my fears were relieved when I had a conversation for the 1st time in my life with another CD. At that point I knew there was another person just like me. It was a wonderful feeling. I have come a long way from that night. But I often think about it and am so glad I took that step.
Yours Terri

[Joni Marie Cruz]

Go for it, girl. Really, the longer you wait the more you will just kick yourself later. What got me was the overwhelming lack of concern nearly everyone displayed. I was hoping for more attention, you know, paparazzi wanting my picture, fervent requests for my autograph and cell phone number. Endorsements for shoes and clothes and makeup. Still waiting

Hugs...Joni Mari

[Robynts]

My first time out in public was many years ago, after I bought my first wig. I was sitting at home all alone cuz the family was gone for a week. I could not stand the idea of being all made up with a beautiful new wig crowning my head.

I got on the internet and contacted a girl from the Bluegrass Belles. That evening, several girls from the Belles were kind enough to meet me for dinner. All I had to do was drive 100 miles fully made up and meet them at a TGIFridays! We had a great time. Even though we were read almost immediately, the staff was wonderful to us.

I will never forget the feeling of the cold winter air blowing up my skirt. Especially when I was gassing up my car at the truck stop on the way home!

What a great experience, and my experiences in public since then have all been good too.

I am still grateful to those wonderful Belles for opening up the world for me.

Robyn

[Miranda09]

My first time out was this past Friday at the Be-All. Spent from 3pm to 3am dressed, which included a trip to a local gay bar!! It was made easier by being around others at a convention like this as well as going out with a group, along with encouragement and support from a member here...JeneeDavis. I'll be posting soon on this litte adventure. WHAT A BLAST...and such a RUSH!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

[Rachel Morley]

My first time out was a "dress and drive" thing. I was fully dressed with all the appropriate padding, wig and makeup etc. I was dressed to blend in. I posted about it on this forum (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=9796) that was back in June 2005.

How did I get the courage? Well, I was fighting a battle of my fear of being noticed verses my overwhelming desire to go out (one day) dressed fully en femme. I just knew I had to do it one day before I died or I'd be so sad that I'd missed such an opportunity in my life .... and seeing as we never know when our time is up, it was a case of "it's better to regret something you have done than something you haven't" ! :D Of course, I've never regretted it at all. It was a fantastic feeling of validation and liberation :)

[TxKimberly]

There were two Tgirls that I had been chatting online with for more than a year, and we all decided to meet one night at "'Bout Time", a local friendly bar. My wife went with me, and one of the other girls wife went with her. We had to get a babysitter and get a hotel to get ready in. As the other Tgirl, her wife, my wife, and I all were leaving the hotel, two guys stopped dead in their tracks. One of them shook his head and said "Damn! Y'all look GOOD!".
So, my first night out, and my first time meeting another, and we had a blast that night!
That was about 15 years ago and I haven't looked back since.

[Barbara Dugan]

this kind of posts are my favorites....now that my legs are all healed I think its time to go out for the first time and see the daylight of crossdressing thought the idea really scare me on a good way:hugs:

[TSchapes]

I played in a road band, a trio. The lead singer was a girl. And when Halloween came along, I told her (and her husband) that I wanted to go as a girl.

She took me to Lane Bryants and then she did my makeup for the night. I was in heaven! I must have been 28 years old, and I loved her for her help.

From there I joined a club in Cleveland called the Paradise Club and ventured out a number of times afterwards.

[Deidra Cowen]

Wrote about my first time right here on the forum back in 2005!

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=8498

Its kinda fun to go back and look at the stuff I wrote back then. (wink) Courage? You are going to be a bit scared...just gotta force yourself to do it!

[Helen 2]

A lesbian friend of many years to whom I confided my secret. Several weeks after I confided in her, I called her up and asked her to 'take me out shopping' with her -and to my surprise she not only agreed, she actually helped me with my makeup. It was actually somewhat erotic to have another gurl applying my makeup while I was dressed in nothing but my firm foundations, stockings, heels and a short, brief, clingy robe.

We shopped for several hours, had a light, early dinner, went to the movies and then to her house until late in the evening - a very wonderful time.

It was that day and evening that proved to me that
a) I could do this
b) I looked good enough to pass to >80% of the people I crossed paths with
c) I did not care about what the other 20% thought
d) I could do again anytime I wanted to....

So, find a friend and go have some fun!:hugs:

[Sally2005]

First time (fully dressed) in daylight was just a drive and using a public washroom stall to change. Talk about fear! Other times were for parties and they are a blast because you can talk to other people without too many questions about why you are dressed.

[BillieJoe]

I was 24 and living in an apartment downtown. I spent all day Saturday (37 years ago) on a cool April day dressing and refining my look. I had longish hair and set it the best I could. After all my prep I got dressed in all my most femininie finery and walked out to the parking lot and hopped into my car. Drove around for quite awhile. I stopped ocassionally to get out and walk around a few blocks. I passed maybe twenty five people and only one teenage girl stopped to really stare me down. I think I passed ok. I was scared and very nervous at the time but I definitely found a new dimension to my CDing that night!

[battybattybats]

First time out I was scared witless. I almost backed out several times, had heaps of trouble with my makeup and ended up a couple minutes late to the show (womens comedy fesitval).

I got recognised by several people who gave me heaps of compliments. got dragged backstage during the intermission where several of the comedians complimented both my appearance and bravery and one signed a copy of her book for me.

All positive responses and not one negative.

Same for the parties i've since gone to fully en-femme, though often they've been mainly (though not totally) Goths attending. And my neighbours too, also accepting.

When dressed in my increasingly androgynous day-to-day fashion I've got a lot of compliments and a small nuber of sneers, nasty looks and a couple of laughs. The compliments vastly outweigh the negatives.

[Susieboots]

First time out was when I was about 13..........and stupid! I never got caught luckily but I think it was because it was dark. Then I started dressing again quite recently and after a few daylight drives with no make-up/wig and lots of nerves I started getting back into makeup again and thats when I decided, or the pink-fog descended, that I didn't want to stay at home all dolled up.
Lots of nerves but the first proper time I walked to my mums in the rain(she was out)and realised that nobody really takes that much attention unless you really stand out and wondered why I didn't do it before. i just went for it. I just do it now and love it. I still get the initial nerves but enjoy it anyway. Go for it. :)

I hope this helps

Susie xx

[Barbara918]

My first time out (other than Halloween, when CDing is almost mandatory) came after many years of wanting to go out but feeling I needed a "cover story" should someone ask why I was dressed like that.
By a happy coincidence, the manager of my local watering hole (who did not know I CD'd, although the bartender did) decided to institute "Ladies Night" :) . How could I resist that opportunity? The bartender gave me the discount AND 3 people bought me drinks! I never had so much to drink AND so much money left over at the end of the night!
This was also when I started letting my close friends into the loop. Happily, they were all okay with my CDing; the worst reaction I got was a "Whatever" sort of indifference.

[Butterfly Bill]

I've written about it and have it on http://users.isp.com/farfallabill/ComeOut.htm

[Leslie Mary S]

First time Out? Hummm?

For me in my past there are a whole string of firsts.

Probably the first time out was as a woman at a square dance and my wife was dressed as a man. I had to play the part, including dancing, as a woman all evening. Everyone thought it was just a gimmick that I was participating in, The truth be told, I was in seventh heaven. That was the extent of it averaging about 1.5 times each year for some 30+ years.

Then I lost my wife. Back into the closet I went, I had lost my ally and main supporter.

Then about 2 years ago out I went with the assistant and urging of of DA, Kimberly Diamond (one of my fashion models), and 'M' as my male escort, en fem for halloween party. Still not a truly valid first time out.

Then came a "womanless beauty contest". Again DA and 'M' were with me, but which I extended to an additional 1.5 hours.

Then came the REAL firsts.

Dark Anggel, "M", and I - Leslie - went to Knoxville, TN for no other reason than to get Leslie out. We did this three times.

The first "solo" time out was to go to "Krystals" in town, some 15 miles away, with no one else in the vehicle. This came about after DA and I had been working on my make-up and dressing skills. She got hungry and sent me to get them thare vittles as I was dressed. I never left the vehicle, I used the drive through. That was the first of ONLY two Solo trips I have ever made. The other was a 2 am necessity shopping trip into Wal-mart.

Except for these two trips I have always had the luxury of another person for support.
So as you can see, I am an old hand and a newbie at the same time.

[Carole Cross]

The first time I went out dressed and with make up was last New years Eve. I was nervous when I stepped outside and when I introduced myself to the group I was meeting, but after a while I started to enjoy myself. Now it doesn't bother me and I am pretty confident now when I go out. :battingeyelashes:

I did dress in my teens, when doing an early morning paper round, but I rarely saw anyone so it wasn't really out in public.