i have several male admirers, so confused

[JulieP]

as you know i have a myspace page and enjoy blogging. well today i got 8 messages from guys wanting to meet me. some were cute and some not so. anyway i'm trying to explain, to one of the cute ones, that i am not a woman and infact i am a man. i really need to get to my therapist on tuesday cause this is bothering me, first i find him cute and that i actually wanted to be his woman for a second or 2.

i want the dead honest truth. do i really look like a woman in my pics? maybe it's just me that can see the man under the makeup? i may have to lock down my myspace and turn it invisible till i can get this straight in my head. this is going way to fast for me.

[JulieP]

thank you. i guess i never thought that i would attract and guys (at a long distance maybe) let alone comming home to 3 pages of emails from guys wanting to date me. and it's just my luck the most persistant one live here in stafford. :doh:

[az_azeel]

as Berinthia said be carefull as this is the net.. but its not surprising your getting hits from men.. youy myspace profile says you are female.. that alone is can be deceitful and can lead to a lot of abuse should someone actually find out your a man.. unless its what you want .. just be carefull ...

[Di]

Regardless of your pics you blog spells it out...so me thinks you have admirers.

[TommiTN]

Julie, I can commiserate. I was out to a bar with some friends last Saturday. An admirer kept hitting on me and one of my friends. This was the first time I'd gotten such persistent attention from a guy and I gotta say it was kinda creepy (so was he) but flattering at the same time. I still have mixed emotions about it.

[Rachel Morley]

i want the dead honest truth. do i really look like a woman in my pics?
Going on your avatar and profile pic, yes. IMHO You have a very natural feminine look in your pictures. As for the guys "maybe not knowing", well I doubt it.

Take me for example. I have it clearly written in the first sentence of my Yahoo profile that I'm a happily married crossdresser and I still get guys "hitting on me" or requesting to be my friend. I don't mind in the least but I do hope they understand that it's never going to go anywhere. In your case, I agree with Di, I think they know that you're not a genetic female and they don't care or that that's perfectly ok as a T-girl is what they're looking for. :)

[Joni Marie Cruz]

Hi Julie-

It is weird and confusing and oddly flattering at the same time, isn't it? Yes, you do look like a girl, btw. I've been hit on a few times both on line and out and about. I figure they must be drunk or nearsighted. Fortunately for me I am happily married and my wife would transition me with a grapefruit spoon if I messed around, so it's easy to say no, though I have been very tempted. Very tempted.

Just be careful, girl. There are lots of crazies as well as very genuine people out there on the net. If you ever do decide to meet someone, take all the precautions that any girl would take meeting someone for the first time. Good luck to you. Oh, one last thing. A lot of times fantasies are much better than the real thing and you don't have to change the sheets or go get a checkup afterwards.

Hugs...Joni Mari

[Evelyn74]

Sweety that is great that you are attracting men. That is so cool to me. I hope you get your feeling right. you look so amazing in your profie pic
Evelyn

[carhill2mn]

I posted a profile and a few photos on a site. In my profile I state that I am a CD and am only interested in hearing from other CDs. I have gotten a "ton of hits" from all sorts of men. I have ignored nearly all of them. I did exchange messages with a few that appeared to be interesting. Most took the "hint" that we realy had nothing in common. I had to cut it off with one or two.

[Kate Simmons]

Just be careful out there my friend. Most guys are not worth the paper they are printed on.:)

[AmandaM]

I think that some of the guys might not know you're TG.

[Tamara Croft]

Men don't read profiles, they ogle at pictures.... you should set them straight, or you could end up digging yourself out of a hole....

[dawnmarrie1961]

You look like who you are supposed to be. But do be careful! It is usually the ones that see us day after day that we have to worry about!

[AllieSummers]

I wouldn't say you are a woman unless you are. You are starting things off on the wrong foot.

Maybe you could put that you are a woman in your profile so guys will search for you but in your description or whatever be sure to say you are a TG right up front.

I think honesty is the best policy all around.

Kisses,

Allie

[Misty is Kindafem]

first i find him cute and that i actually wanted to be his woman for a second or 2.

i want the dead honest truth. do i really look like a woman in my pics?


Tell me something gorgeous, do you want to meet a man but you're scared he won't find you attractive once he meets you up close? Are you worried that you won't be able to maintain the illusion because of your body and/or voice?

Let me give you a little hint, don't try to act or advertise yourself like a woman. Tell them you're a CD or TG or whatever. THEY WON'T CARE. It's so amazing that there are perfectly nice men out there who like us for who we are. I don't know why, but apparently there's a pole for every hole honey.

I have an ad on AFF and it's a blast! I turn on my little webcam and flirt with the boys for hours on end. The attention from those wonderful men can be very addictive and empowering and frankly, I recommend it.

Please don't get too uptight and waste too much time.

We're not getting any younger :hugs:

-Misty

[MissConstrued]

Here comes Captain Obvious to the rescue!



anyway i'm trying to explain, to one of the cute ones, that i am not a woman and infact i am a man.


Maybe if you had checked "male" instead of "female," this wouldn't be a problem. But if you're going to lie, you deserve what you get.

Doncha think?

[Shari]

Truth be told, not knowing who you are, if I were to see your picture for the first time I would guess you to be a cd.

In one part you say you're a male and in another part you say you are a female.

Why don't you state more firmly what you want? Why not write that you're looking for female friends and not interested in men?
Unless of course you are interested and secretly enjoy the attention and the flattery.

Another thing to ask yourself is why are you advertising at all? What's the motivation for you to be posing as a woman? What are you ultimately looking for?

[Mirani]

Your profile shows your gender as "Female" . . . . so it is not unreasonable to assume you are!

If you don't want confusion, I suggest you state clearly who you are and what you are looking for.

[onerous]

IMO your profile pic on here looks like a GG, I wouldn't think otherwise.
The myspace pic is a bit more CDer-ish, but unless someone was specifically looking for that, definitely they will believe that its a 100% GG.

If I was a guy looking for love/a hookup on myspace, though i've never used it before, i would assume that there would be hundreds of results i'm interested in.. so no time to actually read thru the profiles properly. Tunnel vision would probably result in pink bg + female gender listed + SINGLE + girl pic = auto message. Most probably even a copy/pasted interested message.

Of course there would also be those who saw the "male" part written in your profile but decided to give it a reply anyway, since it couldn't hurt. Or they might be confused about the other two parts at the same time talking about being a female.

just imho.


Bruce

[Chrissie P]

Guys think with their penis, so get used to it. I think that saying you are a woman is misleading. In the very few sites or ads that I have posted I have always written " Middle aged tv/cd" Sometimes I throw in the word "attractive, LOL !!"

Guys are going to look, for sure. It's flattering. I go out when I travel and get looks all the time. Just do what a woman does, act like you are ignoring it ( but she's not).

As everyone else has stated BE CAREFUL. Do not get yourself into a situation you cannot get out of. It's not worth it.

[Alice Torn]

I had similar experience, when i had a myspace photos, and profile. Lots of guys wanting a relationship, even marriage! I told most of them the truth about lucille. Some didn't give up. I finally pulled my pics, and profile. After 55 yrs of singleness, I am convinced, that seven times more guys, are seeking women, than vice versa!! My men seeking women single ads, draw very little response, but, ads as a lady, get many responses. Would that it could be the other way around sometimes! I have come very close to meeting admirers, but, either wising up, and, or fear, chickened out. Sadly, we live in a world, where we can't trust much. I trust my cats, though.

[Sophie_C]

as you know i have a myspace page and enjoy blogging. well today i got 8 messages from guys wanting to meet me. some were cute and some not so. anyway i'm trying to explain, to one of the cute ones, that i am not a woman and infact i am a man. i really need to get to my therapist on tuesday cause this is bothering me, first i find him cute and that i actually wanted to be his woman for a second or 2.

i want the dead honest truth. do i really look like a woman in my pics? maybe it's just me that can see the man under the makeup? i may have to lock down my myspace and turn it invisible till i can get this straight in my head. this is going way to fast for me.

Look, I think you've done a wonderful job with your look, but I am certain all or nearly all of those men have a thing for TV/CDs. And, nothing's wrong with that, but it really takes far more than clothing / makeup / etc to be fully passable.

[Barbara Dugan]

Tell me something gorgeous, do you want to meet a man but you're scared he won't find you attractive once he meets you up close? Are you worried that you won't be able to maintain the illusion because of your body and/or voice?

Let me give you a little hint, don't try to act or advertise yourself like a woman. Tell them you're a CD or TG or whatever. THEY WON'T CARE. It's so amazing that there are perfectly nice men out there who like us for who we are. I don't know why, but apparently there's a pole for every hole honey.

I have an ad on AFF and it's a blast! I turn on my little webcam and flirt with the boys for hours on end. The attention from those wonderful men can be very addictive and empowering and frankly, I recommend it.

Please don't get too uptight and waste too much time.

We're not getting any younger :hugs:

-Misty

I agree with Misty.....just don't do anything while confused once you make your choice enjoy it because you are in for a ride:hugs:

[Emily01]

i want the dead honest truth. do i really look like a woman in my pics?

i'll answer you this way; you don't look like a guy at all. best of luck sorting this out .....perhaps the distance created by the internet is the perfect distance between illusion and disappointment.

[JulieP]

Thank you for the honesty. if you don't know about the mistakes you make you won't learn and grow from them.

this tuesday i start going to counceling, am i a CD or TG, well for me that is the million dollar question. i don't know how many times i saw myself in the mirror and thought who is this and why is my wife/girlfriend attracted to him. i would even go as far as tell my ex that i could cut off my penis and niether of us would miss it (we hadn't had sex in the last 3 years of the marriage) as it was rarely use (except to pee) and it feels uncomfortable (has for as long as i can remember).

as for the myspace page, i never had one but thought it would be a place just to host some pics, thoughts and feelings. well now i know that the 2 sides of the coin are completely different. most likely these guys throw a ton of crap against the wall in hopes that something will stick. as for being attracted to men, i truely never looked until recently and some are. do i want to jump into bed with them....no i don't. when i look at women i look at there makeup (color, how much/little and application), how they walk, general movements, what are they wearing and to where.

[Georgia Rose]

I'd tread very carefully unless you are looking for a gay relationship. From what I hear most guys on the net are just looking for sex and don't care where they get it from. They don't bother to read the fine print.

I think Missconstrued summed it up very succintly (as she generally does)

[denns61]

Julie,

I expect that the men who are approaching you are perfectly aware that you're not a gender girl. They find you attractive for who you are. All are horny, but some are decent guys that really like tgirls(like me). I assume others are curious, clueless, maybe jerks.

So be careful. If it's what you want go for it. Obviously meet the guys in a safe place first. Maybe drinks at a local tg friendly bar.

Play safe!!

[Dr.Susan]

Tranny chasers are a staple of Myspace. Unlike the ones who are members here and just download members pictures and don't post anything, the ones there are much more outspoken and predatory.

[Nicole Erin]

Well, yes, you look like a woman, I don't think you would have too much problems passing. As far as how pretty? Well, average.

Thing with some men, they so much as see the word "woman" on the web and they get turned on and want to date.

Other words that turn men on - female, girl, woman, XX chromosome...

It could be nothing more than a completely blank web page with one of those words and some guys go crazy and want to know where this cyber-babe is so they can try to get a roll in the hay.

Some men chomp at the bit. If they think it is a woman, they don't care what it looks like.

[vivianann]

I have been on dating sites wnere I state that I am a male crossdresser looking for a woman with bold statement saying "NO MEN PLEASE", but to no avail, the men still want to meet or date me, I tell them no, but they still persist, I just wish GG's would respond to my dating ads. I do believe that there are alot more men on dating sites than women. I think there are 10 men to 1 woman on the dating sites.:sad:

[MissConstrued]

Thing with some men, they so much as see the word "woman" on the web and they get turned on and want to date.



Oh, yes, men are pigs, men are awful, everything is a man's fault, death to men. :brolleyes:


The blame here goes to only one man -- the OP -- who found it too damn hard to check the "male" box.

Hey, if you're a tranny and want tranny-chasers to chase you, you can check "male" and they'll still chase you. Why not eliminate the confusion? No matter how strong your fantasy of being a woman with a man is, it's just a fantasy. Don't foist it on the public.

[Deborah Jane]

The blame here goes to only one man -- the OP -- who found it too damn hard to check the "male" box.

Hey, if you're a tranny and want tranny-chasers to chase you, you can check "male" and they'll still chase you. Why not eliminate the confusion? No matter how strong your fantasy of being a woman with a man is, it's just a fantasy. Don't foist it on the public.

:yt: :iagree:....If you're a man say you're a man!!

[luvlysublisa4u]

Julie, let me save you a trip...I'll play therapist: "be honest on your myspace profile, know what you are after when you post a web profile, and state it clearly in that profile".

There, now wasn't that easy?