Was asked to get dressed up by three ladies and said...

[tracylee]

NO! Recently at a club I belong to I was asked to dress up as a woman for a charity next week....It kind of caught me off guard and I just said "No-way"...The one girl kept trying to persuade me by saying "you would look good, and its for a charity fund raiser"...

Anyways, I'm so closeted that I just couldn't...

The conversations by the three ladies was quite interseting as they kept talking about who they could get to dress up and several guys that came in also were also approached and each one said no until finally one older gentleman said yes...

Had my chance to be out but gave it up....OH WELL!!!!

[mishelle379]

u lost the opportunity of a lifetime

[BeckiB]

I think you are missing a huge opportunity here. I would call them back up and say yes!! You can also tell them you have no idea of what you are doing and that they would have to help with the makeup and clothes. Free tips and makeover!!!! How great is that not to mention you are helping charity. I think they call that a win-win

[cindyscute]

I think you are missing a huge opportunity here. I would call them back up and say yes!! You can also tell them you have no idea of what you are doing and that they would have to help with the makeup and clothes. Free tips and makeover!!!! How great is that not to mention you are helping charity. I think they call that a win-win

Yes get the girls involved in the makeover it would be fun fun :D

Don't let this opportunity pass you by.

[Stephanie Stephens]

That's a great opportunity, if you still have it. If any guy asks you can say "what the hell it's for a good cause".

[Shelly Preston]

You can call them and tell them you have thought it over and changed your mind

Who knows they might want to experiment on your before the event :D

[Glenda]

This is exactly why it is so hard for crossdressers to come out of the closet. We have been brought up our whole lives being told what guys do or don't do. Girls just want to have fun. Guys just don't want to be embarrassed or laughed at. What's the matter with guys having fun too instead of worrying about what someone will say? Especially for a charity event when everyone will know you were asked, begged and pleaded with to do it!

It is really a shame that males crossdressers are the ones who (in my simple mind) often discriminate against ourselves the most and keep that closet door latched. You can tell yourself that you'll say yes next time, but you probably won't be asked next time.

[Katie145]

NO! Recently at a club I belong to I was asked to dress up as a woman for a charity next week....It kind of caught me off guard and I just said "No-way"...The one girl kept trying to persuade me by saying "you would look good, and its for a charity fund raiser"...

Anyways, I'm so closeted that I just couldn't...

The conversations by the three ladies was quite interseting as they kept talking about who they could get to dress up and several guys that came in also were also approached and each one said no until finally one older gentleman said yes...

Had my chance to be out but gave it up....OH WELL!!!!

oh... stop my beating heart! What an opportunity! I guess I can understand your apprehension, you can only go as far as your fears let you. I don't go out dressed at all, unless I have a good reason for it; I think this would qualify, though ;). Why doesn't this ever happen to girls like me? :sad:

[PrettyFlowingGown]

I would've done it......easily.

[Ashlee]

I would've done this. I would've played it down and used the whole "what the heck, it's for charity" thing and did this to the nines. Call them back and tell them you reconsidered.

psst....what organization requires this so I can join in my area.

[JenniferR771]

Don't you have one charitable bone in your body? Change your mind! It will be so fun. Tell them you were pressured but can't say who. And tell them you now have a special personal relation to the charity. You can't miss this opportunity.

[Jenny Brown]

NO! Recently at a club I belong to I was asked to dress up as a woman for a charity next week....It kind of caught me off guard and I just said "No-way"...The one girl kept trying to persuade me by saying "you would look good, and its for a charity fund raiser"...

Anyways, I'm so closeted that I just couldn't...

The conversations by the three ladies was quite interseting as they kept talking about who they could get to dress up and several guys that came in also were also approached and each one said no until finally one older gentleman said yes...

Had my chance to be out but gave it up....OH WELL!!!!
I'm sure 99% here will disagree with me but I think you made the right decision. In this type of situation, there's the possibility that you dress up "too good" and people will never stop hounding you. If you weren't ready for that, you made the right call. These type of things are the equivalent of drsssing up like a clown, all about men mocking women and IMHO, that's not necessary, but whatever, if they say "it's for charity". :doh:

[anDrea F]

Traceylee please change youre mind.Tell them youve give it some thought and decided it might be a bit of fun. Go on.

[Chloe' Buffington]

I know how you feel, but I also know you will be ready when your ready. When the time (your time) is right you'll know it. You must be willing to take that step outside your compfort zone and you alone can make that decision. I would have done it instantly but I am not you and you are not me, you made the right choice for you and thats all I got to say about that.
:love:

[anDrea F]

Tracylee please change youre mind.Tell them youve give it some thought and decided it might be a bit of fun. Go on.

[Nicole Erin]

I would do it as long as I didn't have to wear a skirt or look business like
Dressing up is a pain

[Sharon B.]

I disagree with Jenny, if you let the three girls dress you up how would you look to good as if you done it yourself and came out looking too good.
I would have said no in the beginning but would have come around to it if they were persistent enough for me to do it.

[Jilmac]

If it had been me they asked, I would have jumped at the chance and then turned it back on the three ladies by asking them to help me dress and coach me on being a perfect lady. :)

[Emma England]

If the girls are wanting you to dress up, then what are you afraid of?

[Miranda09]

Traylee...you should have said yes, as everyone has mentioned. You might still be able to do it...couldn't hurt to ask. I'm pretty closeted myself, but I think I would have said yes if I had been approached in that manner.

[Joni Marie Cruz]

NO! Recently at a club I belong to I was asked to dress up as a woman for a charity next week....It kind of caught me off guard and I just said "No-way"...The one girl kept trying to persuade me by saying "you would look good, and its for a charity fund raiser"...

Anyways, I'm so closeted that I just couldn't...

The conversations by the three ladies was quite interseting as they kept talking about who they could get to dress up and several guys that came in also were also approached and each one said no until finally one older gentleman said yes...

Had my chance to be out but gave it up....OH WELL!!!!

Please don't throw me in the briar patch. I would have pretended to consider it for that long (Joni watches a photon cross the room) and then said, "Well, since it is for charity." and squealed with delight and clapped my iddy hands.

Hugs...Joni Mari

Hugs...Joni Mari

[falcongts]

Have more than one guy dress up

[Monica93304]

I think it's such a great opportunity to feel free to be yourself. Please don't pass it up. I'm someone that is working up the courage to go out by myself during the day shopping, now that I don't have a supportive SO/GF.

[Kate Jennings]

I was asked to do the same thing and jumped on it. I LOVED it and it moved my dressing to a new level. Do it.

[tracylee]

A little more on this...

There are teams of people and each team needs one male to dress up for a "beauty contest"...there is a parade through town and then the judging at the sports field...

Most of the guys do look like clowns and only a few look passable (or somewhat)...last year the ones that looked good did get some comments about liking it too much...or " do you do this at home too"!!

Anyways, I'm very well known and a public figure in the area...

This just seemed to be more harm than fun for me...I'll chose the safety of my home for dress up times...

My opinion only...I know it would be a dream come true but once its done there's no turning back with all the pictures they take...

[Sarah89]

Anyways, I'm very well known and a public figure in the area...


Wouldnt you want to be well known for being able to have fun and be a good sport ?

Obviously if you dont wanna do it , then thats fine, do what your most comfortable with.

We had a charity thing in work at christmas involving a makeover, and I couldnt put my hand up to volunteer fast enough haha !

YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT !

JUST GO FOR IT !!!! :D

[sissystephanie]

I would do it as long as I didn't have to wear a skirt or look business like
Dressing up is a pain

But OHH, what a beautiful pain! I would love for some ladies to ask me to dress as a woman. I would say yes in a heartbeat! A very fast heartbeat! Wonder if the older gentleman who did say yes is a CD?

[Mary Jane1]

Hmmmmm, I don't know Tracylee, I think I'm spotting a trend here.

You've probably heard the expression, 'when opportunity knocks' ... well, I think I hear someone at the door.

I understand the reasoning of not wanting to get pegged or defined in a certain way. But you can define it any way you want. Remember, they asked you!
Cross dresser or not, I'd go for it and have fun.

That being said, I also can understand a fear of playing a little too close to the truth and getting out of your comfort zone.

On the other hand, 'It's charity' ... Aren't I a big help?

[CD Susan]

Tracy, what a great opportunity you missed! If I had been the one they asked I would have said yes in a heart beat. If It is not too late call them up and tell them you have reconsidered and will do it. This would be so much fun and it is for a good cause too. A win win situation in my opinion.

[Josie M]

Ultimately Tracy, it's your call, but you have the opportunity to do this and play it off as a "good sport". I was in a similar situation myself once upon a time and, while I was nervous at first, when all was said and done, I had a ball.

If you can get over your fear, you will have a lot of fun I promise you :)

[Shelly Preston]

Tracy

Given you have heard comments made in the past to others which may have been made in jest but you never can tell

Since the object is to make the guys look as good as possible which could cause you problems

I think you made the right decision for the long term :) given your circumstances

[Eva Marie]

That's almost exactly how I got started - and never looked back. And, yes, I know the feeling.

[carolinewalker_2000]

Big mistake; you should have gone for it....and enjoyed the experience. No-one could have blamed you and you could have "come out" without anyone knowing!!! What a chance missed.

[TJ Tresa]

I woulkd have jumped all over that. I missed an opertunity a couple of weeks ago. A local charity had a walk as a fund raiser and every walker had to dress in women's clothing, wether male or female, for cancer I think. I didn't know about it until a week after the event. But I'm keeping my ears open for next year.

[PEACHES MARIE]

I agree with the majority. The same situation was presented to me and I reluctanley agreed - wink wink nudge nudge. The place sold out, raised money for a good cause and had a blast all at the same time.

[vjaducd]

Oh my God' you lost an opportunity of cherity.
If I was asked to dress, Without any hesitation I would have agreed & asked them to help me in getting c.d. ready with make over got done by all 3 of them.
Next time don't make such a silly mistake.
vjaducd from India

[Anna the Dub]

It depends on how deeply you want to stay in the closet. If you did get dressed up by them, and had a thoroughly good time, don't you think that the ladies might think that you seemed to be enjoying yourself too much and fitting into the role too easily? I am sure that they aren't stupid. Their idea is probably to have a bloke dress up as a 'bit of a laugh', and for everyone to find it hilarious. However, we all give off little signals as to who we are, and your obvious enjoyment might give them food for thought. Do you really want to 'out' yourself that way? On the other hand, if you didn't care that they might suss you, then by all means do it, and have a great time.

[Nicki B]

This just seemed to be more harm than fun for me...

Then do what you feel is best.

[Teri Jean]

Tracy, I have to admit I am intreged with the idea of having myself made up for an event like this but I have to go along with Shelly on this one. I did this on halloween last year and am still getting the sideways glances and the smirks from co-workers. As a person who is readily recognized and looked as a pillar within the organizations I represent it becomes a balancing act of my desires and what is a reality.

Make the coince on your terms and then you will be truely satisfied. The what ifs are dreams and when your dreams are ready to become reality you will know. Have fun and hope you are well.

Huggs Keli

[Carly D.]

You should have said if so and so will do it then you would.. I think I would do that.. my little brother dressed in a dress for work one day last fall for charity for cancer awareness and I don't think he actually does cross dress.. in fact I know he doesn't cross dress, it was just a lark thing.. other guys did it and so he did.. actually he said yes and others decided to say yea as well... if I were asked I think I would say yes if other guys said yes.. how dressed up would I dress?? good question..

[Joni Marie Cruz]

This just seemed to be more harm than fun for me...I'll chose the safety of my home for dress up times...

My opinion only...I know it would be a dream come true but once its done there's no turning back with all the pictures they take...

Tracy-

Thank you so much for clarifying this. I agree with Nicki. My earlier response still stands, but that is only how I might act under the circumstances. Your circumstances are yours and you are the only one who can decide what would be best for you. Please don't let the fact that most of us are frantically waving our arms in the air and shrieking, "Pick me! Pick me!" put any sort of pressure on you (you don't sound like the kind of person who would let it). For heaven's sake, if it would cause you any problems whatsoever, then don't. This is the kind of thing it might be better to regret not having done it than regret having done it. (Did that last sentence make any sense?)

Good luck, Tracy, enjoy the charity event, I hope it's very successful whether you're endrabbe or endragge.

Hugs...Joni Mari

[lesley jay]

I support Glenda's comments that we are affraid someone maybe watching us and were affraid of being caught out,i unfortunately may have responded the same way as you.

[nvlady]

"Oh I wouldn't want to look like a guy in a dress."
"Oh, it's a beauty contest?"
"Well if I want to win I guess I'll have to do as good a job as possible, I'll even go so far as getting my eyebrows waxed. After all, it IS for charity."

[Kristen Kelly]

I would do it in a heartbeat but I am far from closeted. Two years ago I dressed for Halloween at a dude ranch I have been going to for over 30 years, I am there 4-5 times a year, the staff know my brother and I very well and I am friends with many of them but they did not know this side of me. I dressed for dinner the night of the costume party, in tight low rise women's jeans, western high heel boots, a red low cut top with a white lace bra as well as plenty of cleavage peaking out over the top, my makeup was just enough but not too much and my own hair was perfect. I had beautiful silver and turquoise western jewelry on, and my nails done up as well. I was the last to arrive in the dinning room and planned it that way to make my "Grand Entrance". I sat down at my table; I was seated with 7 women who I had 3 meals with already. To say they were shocked was an understatement and received many compliments as well as a comment from 1 of the women that she was jealous of my cleavage. I dressed for the party that night as a gypsy and won best male costume, 3rd place best female costume, and best couple. I danced the night away in 4" stiletto boots and a long flowing skirt, It was had a blast. The next day out on the trail ride a woman from my table started a conversation and said, “You have done this before haven’t you”, and I asked, “What gave me away?” She replied, “You looked and acted like one of us women, not a guy in a dress and danced too good in heels but it was every time you went to the dance floor you placed your purse at the base of the column, and after dancing you lady like bent down to pick it up, and not once did you forget, that's what really gave you away.” She told me how she does amateur theater and we talked how I have as well and just how much fun I have with what I do.
I have since gone there for weekends as Kristen, and have been accepted well, and when I book they ask what name to place on the guest list.

Don’t miss out on a chance to have a night of fun, for you only might have 1 chance to do it.

[Kate Jennings]

I should tell you I am extremely high profile in my community. That made the "coming out" of dressing that much better. A number of local "big wigs" dressed with me, they probably had no idea how much I loved it. Later, I actually had one community leader confess that he dressed at home often. Do it! You never know what will come of it and you have the cover of doing it for charity! Good luck in whatever you choose.

["Mary"]

You can call them and tell them you have thought it over and changed your mind

Who knows they might want to experiment on your before the event :D

Absolutely - you know you want to! Go for it girlfriend!

[Mistybtm]

Nothing like a little peer preasure here you must do what is best for you.

[Yvonne York]

Go for it - what have you got to lose? And maybe, just maybe, one of them may have an inkling that you will enjoy it. :battingeyelashes:

[DinaMature]

"dood?!?!?!" what were you thinking?

As was said, perhaps "the chance of a lifetime"....

But I do understand, we have our defence systems and we operate in such an automatic mode, especially in the face of those threats we're so specifically onguard against.
We build walls for safety but they don't discriminate between friend or foe.

What a nice compliment that they said you'd look so good.... hahah I should be so lucky. Not.

[Laura_Stephens]

I would hate it - but ANYTHING for charity! :daydreaming:

[trannie T]

If you don't feel comfortable doing it I will volunteer. After all we should support charities.

[DanaR]

I do hope that you change your mind. It really sounds like fun. Call one or a couple of the women and say you would like to reconsider but are a little scared of what others might think of you. I'm sure that your new friends will help you out a lot and who knows where it might go from there. Most women are so cool about stuff like this and will probably have some fun with you, but don't let that scare you away.

Let us know if you change your mind.

[denisecdfl]

Since you said that they later got a "yes" answer from an"older gentleman",
the opportunity has passed. Maybe the encouragement you have gotten from this group will make you feel differently if it happens again - it is an annual event for the charity?

[joandher]

Hi You should contact them and say sorry but maybe next year i f you will give me some coaching before hand, that way you may get a few days/nights practice with all 3 of them, and something to look forward to

:hugs:
J-JAY

[tricia_uktv]

The girls here have said it all. Don't be frightened and have the time of your life. If you don't you won't know what have you missed and will regret it for the rest of your life.

The only rule I have had in my head when asked to do something is ... "is it safe". If the answer is yes then I will say yes. Otherwise we don't grow, explore our potential, we can't be happy. So go for it girl, good luck and have fun!

[AllieSummers]

The problem with this is that it would be so obvious that you knew what you were doing that it would probably out you. Either that or you couldn't act fem when dressed so you would feel stupid looking like a girl and have to intentionally act like a guy. :)

I was thinking about taking this Halloween as an opportunity to throw a party and really dress up for it. I have the same concern stated above. People are going to take one look at me and say "you are ejoying this a little too much" and get suspicious or I'll have to act like a macho guy wearing a dress and be miserable all night.

Kisses,

Allie

[Fab Karen]

I was thinking about taking this Halloween as an opportunity to throw a party and really dress up for it. I have the same concern stated above. People are going to take one look at me and say "you are ejoying this a little too much" and get suspicious or I'll have to act like a macho guy wearing a dress and be miserable all night.

Kisses,

Allie
Depends on who you invite. Why would you invite terribly judgmental people?

[MissConstrued]

People are going to take one look at me and say "you are ejoying this a little too much" and get suspicious


Who cares?

I mean, everyone wants to hang around someone who's miserable on Halloween, right? :brolleyes:

I was raised to believe that what other people think about me is none of my business.

[AllieSummers]

Well, assuming they are my friends and family, they will all be judgemental. :)

I'm just kidding...kinda...I'm still thinking about doing it. It would be a lot of fun to dress up in some hooker outfit like most girls do on Halloween. Heck, if they think I look too comfortable being a woman then I'll be one step closer to coming all the way out. :D

Kisses,

Allie

[Crysten]

I can see where this would be a tough choice, and why I might also say no. It's not the dressing so much - but the behavior (for me anyway) when I'm dressed is decidedly girly, to say the least. I doubt I could "tone it down" while doing something like this....and I'm sure I would out myself in the process. I'm not too comfortable doing that right now, so I would probably have said no also.

Crysten

PS. I know I'm a chicken so :tongueout

[Susan.]

Tracy, I would have made the same decision a few years ago. But nowadays, I probably would "suffer" through the charity event.

I think the pictures might actually provide you cover in the future from a number of missteps. "I knew about ________ because I dressed up as a woman for charity once" Or those pictures were from a charity...

Then again, your pictures could make you infamous like Rudy Guliani.

[Alice B]

damm! You blew it.

[Sylvermane]

one of those golden opportunities id love to have :daydreaming: . scary sure but if anyone you knew gave you any problems you could say you did it for a good reason... feign ignorance :heehee:

[carhill2mn]

There is a saying that you only regret what you did not do, not what you did. It is unfortunate that you did not take this opportunity. You would not have had to tell them anything about your CD life.

[terrinoble]

In high school I was asked by several classmates to participate in a "reverse beauty pageant" the school was staging. Inwardly I wanted to jump at the chance. But I was bullied and teased enough in school, and didn't want to fuel the fire, so I declined.

[Phyliss Hdson]

You bet, I would have played it off a little to make the ladies feel like they really had to perswade me, But then I would have put it on them to help me.:battingeyelashes:
Let them dress me, do my make up, have them show me how to walk in heels, etc. Would have tried to set it up where I arrived at the party dressed. so to be at there mercy the whole time. At the party I would have played it up 100%. What a great way to be out dressed with no suspissions.
Chance of a life time gone.

Hugs Phyliss

[PetiteDuality]

The problem with this is that it would be so obvious that you knew what you were doing that it would probably out you. Either that or you couldn't act fem when dressed so you would feel stupid looking like a girl and have to intentionally act like a guy. :)


That would have probably stopped me too. Maybe they try to dress me in a style that I don't like, or select outfits that highlights my male sides, an ugly wig, or appearing as a comedy of a drag act.

The other thing that would have stopped me is that if somebody suspects, this charity thing might confirm them. In my case, I'd be afraid of my parents remembering the time they caught me during my teen years...

However, it could also be a great chance to have a big excuse. If you get caught later in your life, you can say "this charity event started it all, damn it" :D:D:D

[AmberNation]

I guess I'd be worried that they wouldn't do a very good job and I'd have to take over.

[Ms Mira]

Like others have said, that sounds like a real opportunity. As a closeted crossdresser, if I was in a similar situation, I'm not sure how I would react to the 3 ladies asking me. I wouldn't want to jump to say yes, and who knows, my male / closeted instincts might kick in and have me say no before I know it... But hopefully, I'd find a way to say yes regardless of how frightening the prospect might actually be.

I can see why you would say no... It's just world's colliding with several potential negative consequences. But if you just say 'yes', play along a bit and treat the situation with levity, I think you'd be alright.

[Shelby]

At first I felt like this was a missed opportunity but when you filled us in with some more details, your decision might be best. As you said, many times the guys end up looking like clowns, not my idea of cding. Being a pillar in a community has its rewards but also its responsibilities. Some people were not impressed with Mayor Rudy G of New York City would dress up. As for now, you are a closet dresser and perhaps next year when you are more comfortable with it. I personally would have eventually agreed to do it but with the assurance that I look good and not clownish. Only you know what is best for you.