Have you ever been recognised when dressed?

[Gina_C]

It is my biggest fear that when out as Gina someone might recognise me as my male self. I often hear comments that "even my mother would not recognise me" but does that really work?

How many of us have walked past a relative or close acquaintance and not been recognised? How did you feel?

Alternatively have you ever been read by someone close to you despite the change of hair colour and style plus full makeup? What did you do?

[DanaR]

Gina, I think that is the same fear most of us have. What I've determined is that my look is so different than my normal guy look, that it should be difficult recognize me. Most people just don't look at people that close.

[Laurelanne]

HI, well ,ive had both experiences in the past and another more recent. A long while ago i was in line in a fast food place and my uncle came in we even made eye contact and he didnt know me, although im pretty sure he was thinking where do i know her from? anyway I was recognized by my Father many years ago as well. Very awkwarrd but not bad repercussions. Now Just last month a neighbor noticed me and said something she even went so far as to be very loud about it. I left in a hurry and have never spoken to her since, She even went as far as to "tell" my wife about it, (She knows) and well Im sure the whole neighborhood will know, BUT im not worried about it because I learned along time ago that I am who I am and thats that...Good luck:daydreaming:

[flic]

Funny you should bring that up,,,i've just posted in another thread about this very same thing!! I'd finally got up the courage to go to a pride event in my uni town,,,although some drinks were needed for my nervousness!! Returning from the bar, walked out the door,,,,,and straight into a boy i went to school with. I did say sorry,,,but in fairness i was pretty shocked to see him too seeing as school town was hundreds of miles away! Ah well, he gave me a long lingering look and was on his way. I have to assume he knew it was me though because my partner was with me and went to the same school,,,,so he'd maybe figure it from that. Ah well,,worried me at the time,,,now i just see how strange the situation was and laugh!! ahahahahahahaha,,,ooooh, just like that
flic xxx

[CharlotteW]

Well in male mode I have thinning hair so I cut it all off. Some say I look as 'hard as nails' so all in all, very unfeminine, apart from the eyebrows:) A number of people have seen me en-femme and been totally stumped, only recognising me after I had spoken to them.
I did have a plan a few weeks ago to attend and event where my mother-in-law (and the rest of my family) would be in attendance just to see if I could walk past her a few times and not be noticed. I had to look after the children instead.

[notquitegirl]

Yes, but as I only dress from the waist down, that's to be expected.

[gender_blender]

All the time, but then again I'm not closeted. Why does it matter?
If you're recoginized, don't get all worked up and upset, just say hi!

[RachelDenise]

I worried about this to the point of not posting an avatar for a couple of years. Since posting, no surprises. But that may only be that nobody who knows me is on this site.

[deja true]

Um... well.. I just came out to my gf a few days ago and in doing so I showed her my makeover pics from an adventure with Gina Ortiz in El Lay the week before. She was pretty amazed that the ratty, skinny ol' dude she knows as her bf was that presentable cougar in the pics. She wouldn't have recognized me, she said.

In coming out to another friend, I showed her the SCC pics. And she had to look at about 20 of 'em before she finally recognized the girl in 'em that I pointed out as me.

In both cases, the comments were complimentary, thank the goddess!

(So even if my pics from here end up somewhere else on the intra-webs, I guess I don't have much to worry about being exposed to those I don't want to know about deja...Whew!)

:)

[Carol A]

One afternoon many a year ago after the wife and her sister had dress me all up we were sitting at the dinning room table having coffee and chatting when a knock at the door came and in walks the neighbor from across the street looking for me as he need to borrow a tool. I just sat there as there was no place to run. And the truth is he never even knew it was me at the table. Closes I have ever come :doh:

After he was got we all had a great laugh :GD:

[Leanne2]

A while ago I was browsing in a book store located 15 miles from the town I live in. When I decided to leave I started walking toward the exit down the big center aisle. Then I recognized a man walking toward me. I had just visited with him at work a few days earlier. We made eye contact. He didn't recognize me. I quickly turned into a side aisle to avoid a second look. When I left the store my thoughts were," whew. that was close!" Leanne

[Tracii G]

I had a post about this a while back but I ran into my daughter and son-in-law once while enfemme and they didn't recognize me.
I walked right by them several times.I was scared stiff tho'.
If they did know it was me they would have said something by now.

[Franki Kate]

Several years ago I went to a costume party with my wife. She was dressed in a cowgirl outfit and I, I was in a gorgeous dress of lavender cheffon. As it was all neighbors and friends at the gathering, she chose to set to the side and watch folks deal with me. Thoughout the early part of the festivities, no one recognized me at all. One of my best friends stood right beside me and did not know who I was, until I spoke. Most of the men avoided major convesation thoughout the evening, but the women were the most engaging. I even had an eighty year old woman neighbor tell my wife, that if she was 40 years younger she would steal me away from her.

[Carroll]

In a short answer no...but my wife gave me away. She didn't say "Hey, this is my hubby!" What happen is that it was my day off and it was Halloween. I decided to go to the mall where I work. I walking in ahead of my wife and had a few of the guys I work with come up to me asking if I needed any help (these guys are a bunch of womanizing horn-dogs), basically ignoring the few other customers that walked in ahead of me. As soon as Marlene caught up to me, they associated her with me and realized who I was. Talk about awkward! If she is not with me, most people I know don't recognize me.

[Jennifer Marie P.]

The only one that recognized me was my GG friend and that was after I told her but everyone didn't even notice.

[Gizmo, Debbie]

Unfortunatly yes:sad:. It used to bother me but now i dont bother.

[TGMarla]

No, but then, I've never run into anyone I know while dressed. But really, I don't look much like my male self when dressed. Maybe it's the hair. It's still a fear I have, though. I don't go out much, and when I do, I don't frequent places near my home where people ordinarily recognize me.

[Sweet Cindy]

Being recognized would involve leaving the house! ;)
Seriously, I think we're all paranoid. People would really have to look hard to recognize our male image, I think. I've heard stories of cd's who've shown pics of themselves dressed to friends and they couldn't guess who it was. So on the street would be nearly impossible (hopefully).

[sandra-leigh]

Getting recognized as my male self happens to me more often than not -- no matter how different I try to make myself look. Nice wigs in a natural but different colour than my own hair... glasses just for being Tess... what-ever I do, someone who has seen me before is likely to recognize me in a few seconds, from 30+ feet away, in low light.... and the usual reaction of these people is to deliberately take time to come over and greet me nicely and tell me how good I look. Which is nice in one way, that so many people -like- when I dress, but it's also a nuisance... I'm clearly not being thought of as a woman by anyone who has met me before. Open question about what those who have not met me before think.

[linnea]

I have had a few close calls (or so I thought), but as it turns out, the people whom I thought might recognize me, not only didn't recognize me but also didn't really notice me. Now I don't worry about it so much though it is still a bit of a concern to me.
I don't go out in the area where I live; that helps but it is not fool-proof since obviously other people travel too--lol.

[cindym5_04]

It is my biggest fear that when out as Gina someone might recognise me as my male self. I often hear comments that "even my mother would not recognise me" but does that really work?

How many of us have walked past a relative or close acquaintance and not been recognised? How did you feel?

Alternatively have you ever been read by someone close to you despite the change of hair colour and style plus full makeup? What did you do?

I haven't been noticed as such when I've been out. I have, however, been recognized (only because of something in the background) on Hotornot.com by a friend of my best friend... when they were looking at the site AT WORK!!

[Carly D.]

If I'm wearing shades I doubt that anyone would think I look like my male self.. but when I am only wearing my wig it has to be down, the bangs part, otherwise I look just as my male self with a wig askew as it were..

[Niya W]

It is my biggest fear that when out as Gina someone might recognise me as my male self. I often hear comments that "even my mother would not recognise me" but does that really work?

How many of us have walked past a relative or close acquaintance and not been recognised? How did you feel?

Alternatively have you ever been read by someone close to you despite the change of hair colour and style plus full makeup? What did you do?

I got caught by some I had not seen in ten years. He was a bar tender in a gay bar .

[julie w]

Yes years ago in a passed career I was in a mall enfemme and I passed a former employee who was looking at me I didnt
know if he recognized me or not but after that I would get comments
from my co workers . Its my biggest fear now when going out ,If I
was retired I wouldnt care

[SweetCaroline]

I'm actually surprised I haven't yet, since I use my real hair and always wear my glasses, I don't look too differently in male mode than I do en femme.

I'm probably in a minority, but I'd actually RATHER be recognized if someone I knew, say from work or such, saw me out en femme. I don't think any of them would be surprised, and I'm pretty much on the verge of being fully out. I personally don't see the harm in it.:2c:

[PaulaJaneThomas]

It happens to me regularly. Usually there's a friendly exchange of greetings as we pass just as would happen if I were presenting as male. Once one of my neighbours saw me in the supermarket and came rushing across to get my advice on some email problems she'd been having.

[Carole Cross]

I get recognised all the time by my family and TG friends but since they know about me it's not really a problem, lol. Seriously, if anyone who knows me does recognise me, I will tell them that I am transitioning and this is the real me. I don't have a problem with anyone knowing.

[PretzelGirl]

I'm actually surprised I haven't yet, since I use my real hair and always wear my glasses, I don't look too differently in male mode than I do en femme.


After I grew my hair long, I realized that this could be a drawback. With a wig, there is a drastic change from short (or no) hair to the long hair that is styled. Grow you hair long, and the change is very minimal.

[Alice Torn]

It is my unusual height that would give me away, no matter how i presented, or else, y voice.

[Starr]

My only fear of being recognised is being seen in my car which would give me away completely.. I Drive a Corvette wit a custom tag that everyone knows..

[JenniferR771]

At Salvation Army, I had my wig with me. The girls helped me choose my "Halloween costume". I bought a blouse, suit, shoes, jewelry, pantyhose, bra. Decided to wear the outfit out of the store. The girl took my money and put my male clothes in a bag. Just as I headed for the door--a woman acquaintance from church came in with two kids in tow. She didn't seem to notice, but I was panicked and I hid in the fitting room for several long minutes. Finally, the girls said the coast was clear, although she was only about 30 feet away. I slipped out as quiet and quick as I could. LOL!

[kellycan27]

I have, everyday as a matter of fact. When I walk into the office I hear Hi Kelly,good morning Kelly, how are you Kelly?:heehee:......

[sissystephanie]

I have twice been seen by my next door neighbor when dresses, but without a bra. Once in a Sam's Club store and the other time while waiting in line to get my auto tag. Both times we just talked and he never said anything about the skort I was wearing or the feminine tank top. I think he knows I CD!

[lottarosie70]

i agree, when your own hair is long there is not as much change as from short hair to a wig.

additionally, it seems i have a VERY recognizable face...i was at a renaissance festival one year, before the faire opened. i was coming from the showers, wearing t-shirt, shorts, and a towel wrapped around my head (one thing i've always done girl style, because how else should one dry their hair when it is that long?) and a woman called out to me, and we started chatting. turns out she had last seen me 5 years prior, ONE time, in full kilt, with my hair long and loose, looking (as far as i could tell) almost completely unlike i looked that day. certainly a bigger difference between me en femme and not.

on the other hand, when i dressed for halloween (as in my avatar) and went to work, several people seemed to take rather a long time to recognize me...double- and triple-takes abounded. even with the beard, face, and glasses like i always wear, hair worn exactly the same way, apparently the heels, skirt, nail polish, and breasts changed it up enough that they couldn't process at first.

**error! error! does not compute**

lol

[trannie T]

Some years ago on Halloween I went to my usual watering hole. I was not recognised until my voice gave me away as I ordered a drink. Most people recognised me but one man who worked for me stood next to me for a few moments and failed to figure out whoI was. For several month I heard the story about this ugly woman who had been in the bar on halloween.

[Deidra Cowen]

I have not been reconized yet. Several times I have seen at lesbian bars girls that I knew from work. Been just a few feet from them but they did not reconize. One lady...I see her maybe at least once a week at a customer site and I would see her almost everytime I went to the Stage Door. Used to worry about her but she shows no signs of spotting me in boy mode when I see her at work. But I am careful to not talk to her at the bar!!!

Other than that a guy I know very well from work looked right at me while I was driving and stopped at a light. I know I did that momentary look of surprise when I locked eyes with him...was very worried...but he never let on all the times I saw him later.

For a while the neighbors did not seem to catch on to me also but I finally seemed to have gotten spotted and I can tell everyone know nows I am a CD but no one gives me any troubles. The guys just ignore me and the ladies mostly smile at me when I am in girl or boy mode. LOL the guys used to smile or wave...but dont' do that anymore!!!

By the way I am still in the closet a bit...but in a big city like Atlanta you can hide in plain sight if ya know what I mean. Still I take crazy risks and one of these days for sure will get busted I imagine.

[Rachel Morley]

Not yet :worried: ... I seen two guys (on two different occasions) from work when I was out shopping. I looked at them and they looked at me (in passing) ... nothing was said. I don't think they recognized me :)

[vikki2020]

I've walked past people that I know 1/2 a dozen times, with no reaction from them at all.They were not real close friends, but people that would stop and talk if I were in male mode.There was a post here a while back that showed a video of a street experiment, where someone would strike up a conversation with a random passerby, asking for directions.After a small diversion, they switched the person asking, and the other person did not even notice they were talking to a different person!For the most part, were just to busy to pay much attention to what's going on around us.

[Lori31]

Here is the ultimate unrecognizable situation! Nobody in my family knows that I dress but I have dressed up as a women openly on Halloween a couple of times. And this was in the early stages for me when I still looked more like the "guy in a dress" so to speak.

My mother works at a cosmetics counter and this particular Halloween I thought I would dress up in some of her things and pay her a visit as a bit of a joke. The other times I dressed up on Halloween my mother did my makeup and hair and such. But this time I had to do it myself. Needless to say I was quite nervous when I arrived.

After browsing around her counter for what seemed like 10-15 minutes she finally decided to ask me if I needed a hand. Now if I was smart I would have tried to see how far I could go with her treating me like a regular customer, but I didn't.

As soon as she asked me if I needed a hand I replied "no thanks mom". Well when she realized who it was, the look on here face at that exact moment was priceless. She then told me that she kept looking over at me thinking that she recognized the clothes. Or that someone was wearing "her" outfit.

So either I "pass" much better than I realize or people don't really notice much as others have said here. Either way it made my day!

Oh here is another quickie. Another Halloween I decided to go to a straight bar dressed as your typical bar "sl*t" so to speak. I have to tell you that I was getting compliments from many of the staff. And they only discovered my "secret" after I ordered my first drink using my man voice. and since 99% of the people had costumes on many of the patrons just thought I was I girl who chose not to dress up for Halloween. Now how funny is that.

[dawnmarrie1961]

Since I'm "me" 24/7 I get recognised all the time.

[battybattybats]

I was recognised in a darkened room! An audiance in fact! As after getting there late and sitting down someone I knew sat down beside me saying "Hi (Batty)!"

Outside at the same event someone had to come up and see if it was me or a relative of me.

But thats hardly surprising as I already had been wearing eyeliner and lipstick in public.

[LindaTS]

I've bumped into two different people in a Mall that had no idea about who I was. It had me a bit nervous to begin with but everything turned out alright. A couple of other people saw me right here in town (only 1 traffic light) but again, no problem. I know I look a lot different in guy mode but no one ever had an idea :)

[Intertwined]

First, as most of you know, I do not try to hide who I am, No wig (never owned one), very rarely any make-up, SO, Never worry about being read :lol:

Second, being spotted by someone I know, more currious as to what would happen, than worried. This happened a couple of weeks ago, BUT, I didn't know I had been seen. Went to work on a Monday morning, checked in with dispatch, one of our dispatchers said " Frank wants to know why you don't wear a wig or do make-up? ". Frank, a co-worker saw me at the mall in the exact below outfit, when I asked Frank why he didn't say Hi, he said he was on the other side of a 2 level mall going the opposite direction.

Just wanted to say to those that are worried " See, the world didn't come to an end ! "

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=90411&d=1244426496

[TxKimberly]

Sure, I've had lots of people walk up to me and say "Hey, aren't you Kimberly from Texas?" LOL
Just teasing, I know that is not the intent of your question. No, while doing the Kimberly thing, no one has ever recognized Matt.

[Nicki B]

It is my biggest fear that when out as Gina someone might recognise me as my male self. I often hear comments that "even my mother would not recognise me" but does that really work?

The key thing IME is your hair - if you wear your own, your image is much more similar - a wig and some slap make a huge difference.

I've sat in a London restaurant for three hours, talking with two girls from my company (one did my two week, one-to-one induction) - neither recognised me.

I've sat (in boy mode) down next to a T-girl friend, in a pub in Bristol, bought her a drink - and she only realised who I was five minutes later when she was looking away and I talked to someone else.. :rofl:


The transformation's always remarkable, when you meet someone in drab..

[donnalee]

It used to bother me but now i dont bother.

What a great statement! :hugs:

[Kiera]

I once ran into a woman I work with while I was out dressed. She would have walked right past me if I hadnt stopped her and told her I knew her from work. Even after speaking she didnt realise who I was... I had to show her my male ID for her to get it and I saw her on a regular basis at work.
Hugs,
Kiera

[Tasha McIntyre]

Not that I know of, but I have only been out past the front door a couple of times, and only recently.

I am quite confident that, although I won't "pass" as they say, people will just see a CDer without recognizing me.

Cheers

Tash :)

[Gisele]

Nothing as of yet. Nobody has said anything if they have.

I'm sure someone will one day.....Oh well if they do.

[JaytoJillian]

Let's see, a former boss made a fairly agressive pass at me via an on line forum similar to this one. He sent photos, told me what he did for a living, etc. When I saw him at work and, it was very clear that he had no idea. That whole experience kind of freaked me out, but it also instilled a bit of confidence.

[TSchapes]

When I went to my dry cleaners the owner recognized me, but he said it was only because of the ticket I gave him! Of course he knew as his wife does my alterations for me!

-Tracy

[Kiera]

let's see, a former boss made a fairly agressive pass at me via an on line forum similar to this one. He sent photos, told me what he did for a living, etc. When i saw him at work and, it was very clear that he had no idea. That whole experience kind of freaked me out, but it also instilled a bit of confidence.

omg!

[Deb The Brunette]

Let's see, a former boss made a fairly agressive pass at me via an on line forum similar to this one. He sent photos, told me what he did for a living, etc. When I saw him at work and, it was very clear that he had no idea. That whole experience kind of freaked me out, but it also instilled a bit of confidence.


Pay rise shouldn't have been to much of a problem then !!

.

[Barbara918]

Sorta happened several years ago, in a bar.

"Why are you dressed like that?"
"It's Ladies Night, isn't it?"

[Kendra (Tx)]

Considering the fact that I rarely look the same twice, I'd have to say that IF someone did recognize me, they'd have to really be on their toes...Of course I've been told that "you look completely different from 'him' and there's no way someone would recognize you"....Besides, the "Attitude" I present as Kendra is a complete 180 degrees from my "ugly brother"..:heehee: and "he" doesn't have as big boobs or walk with a bit of a "sway" in his step...and no one sees his legs either....:D

http://kendra954.com

[Sharon B.]

I was made one evening a few years ago by a former woman friend only because of the vehicle that I drive.
The harassing phone calls that I had received a few days later by someone she was closed to confirmed it.
Has it stop me from dressing no, just a little more careful somewhat but still go out for drives and one of theses days I hope I find the courage to go to a club and/or shopping as a woman.

[Barbara B]

I dont think I've been spotted, although it will happen as I look a lot like one of my sisters when dressed, and am always out with my wife. It shouldn't take anyone too much brain power to work it out.

[Empress Lainie]

I was at Border's Book Store one day with my sister and SO,

long after my transition to 24/7.

i saw this lady I knew come up to me and call me by my old name. I didn't think I was that recognizable. She also had her two daughters and husband with her.

She didn't know about my transition since I had not seen her for about 3 or 4 years. I taught both her first set of kids now grown and her 2nd set of kids.

So we had a nice conversation and she and her family were completely supportive and invited to visit any time.

I had been wearing my long red hair wigs though when I was teaching her last set of kids. She used to always fix lunch and we would sit at the table and visit for sometimes an hour. I really enjoyed that time with her.

I remember one funny thing happened one of those times.
She had made coffee for me and I was talking to her, picked up the cup by the handle and cup fell off the handle, and landed on the floor. Fortunately it wasn't a full cup at that moment.

[Jonianne]

Yes, a coworker recognized me once, but since a number of people at work already know about me (including his mother), I wasn't very worried.

[Angie G]

This face would be hard to hide even with a ton of make-up so I think I would be right off.:hugs:
Angie

[divamissz]

Most of the time, no. I have actually walked up to people, talked to them, and THEN had to point out who I was.

I was recognized at a club once by someone who worked at a store I went to in boy mode all the time. I know he knew who I was from how he looked at me, but he never said a word about it. I guess he thought it was my thing...

[Sarah Doepner]

I normally only go out in other cities where I'm pretty darn sure I won't run into anyone who knows me personally. The exception is Halloween and just about everyone in the family has either seen my Nurse costume or photos that my wife has on her screensaver. It was fun on when we had to explain to my mother-in-law who the nurse was. She was delighted!

On another note, I noticed the other day that she has even printed up a copy of that nurse costume photo but I'm not sure what she plans to use it for just yet.

[Ellen Ross]

On a recent business trip I was traveling with a technician on a 2 week stay in Massachusetts. One night I was returning to the hotel from my late night out at Club Blu. Now I knew the technician smoked, and he had to go out to the smoking areas outside the hotel front or back doors, and there was the possibility that I would run into him. On the 45 minute drive back I had finally decided if I did that I would just come out to him. I thought he would be cool with it, and keep it to himself. He wanted to go to a strip club, and had mentioned the "what happens in Massachusetts stays in Massachusetts" line as his wife is not down with that. So, I got to the hotel lot and got a spot nearly right in front of the back door close to the elevators. I had just parked and hit the lock button, so the lights flashed twice on my rental car. I dropped the keys into my purse and when I looked up he was coming out of the door. Now my partner knew my car as we had used it many times when we were traveling together. But there were others in the parking lot like it - so I'm not sure he knew it really was "mine". But he saw me leaving the car, and held the door open for me as I entered the hotel. I tried to use my best fem voice to say "thank you", walked in the lobby and got right on the elevator that was open from him coming down to smoke. I had completely chickened out on the coming out thing. I got so nervous right at the last second that I couldn't do it. He did seem to get that "do I know her?" look on his face as I passed by, but he was checking out my body more than my face. I didn't look back to see if he really did recognized me. The next day he was normal and he didn't mention it, but he did want to know if I went out after we went back to the hotel after eating dinner together as my car wasn't parked next to his (where it was after we had come back from dinner) the next morning. I told him I did go out to a bar and have a drink.

So maybe he knows, and maybe not. But I am cool with it either way. As others have said, the world won't end. I'm sure it will happen someday, and after this experience I am that much more ready for it.

Ellen

[sheidelmeidel]

If I am not careful about my wig and padding and make up, I get read by lots of people but never recognized at all.

If you're not in physical danger and you're in a big city, you can just ignore the whole thing and go about your business, as if you don't hear or don't understand what they're talking about. It's not really a problem, and it all depends on your own confidence level. And when you get home, study yourself carefully and try to figure out what gave you away (assuming it isn't obvious).

[Christina Horton]

My only fear of being recognised is being seen in my car which would give me away completely.. I Drive a Corvette wit a custom tag that everyone knows..

Well you think you drive a recognizable car? My 80 Corvette is custom paint the pic below. So if your vette is like mine then you need to worry but if not you might be better of then I . But then again I want to be see in my car.:battingeyelashes::heehee::D




Some years ago on Halloween I went to my usual watering hole. I was not recognised until my voice gave me away as I ordered a drink. Most people recognised me but one man who worked for me stood next to me for a few moments and failed to figure out whoI was. For several month I heard the story about this ugly woman who had been in the bar on halloween.


Oh you poor girl.:doh: Or should i say oh your a lucky girl.:daydreaming: You passed . I always thought of only I could at least pass as a ugly girl I would be happy. But it turns out I think I pass for 95 % of the people out there. That % comes manly form my recent high school 20th reunion where 95 % of the folks did not even know I was a man and most thought I was someones wife LOL. Since I am out to everyone I don't care if the recognize me . dam that feels so good to know.