Obstacles to acceptence

[Krista1985]

I've come a long way in a short time because of CD.com, in a good way too.

Since the first post I read here I find myself identifying with much of what gets posted on this site. But then there are the posts regarding why/when the dressing started, and I am always in the slim minority of folks who didn't get going until their early 20's. For most it's early childhood and adolescence.

I guess you could argue that the one time as a teenager I put on my cousin's bra counts, but I never did have a desire to repeat that act until about two years ago.

When the interest did return and I was driven to seek information on my 'strange' new facination, I found to my horror that much of the available online material concerning CD's TV's and TS's is raunchy adult related smut. I didn't identify with any of the degrading, lude and to my eyes disturbing images I witnessed in the early information seeking phase of my realization.

It led me to conclude I was wrong about wanting to get involved with CD'ing. I didn't seem to have anything in common with anyone who identified as one. All the sources I had looked up seemed to be geared towards adult entertainment, and so I called off the search for a while.

I stumbled back into denial because of bad intel. All us here can probably guess how that went. A year or so later I was back on the hunt for reliable information about what it meant to be a CD. Only this time I was hating myself for it, haunted by the results of my prior research.

In November 2008 I stumbled across this wonderful sanctuary and began reading posts as a lurker. I found myself reading and thinking, "Yes that's me!" and "I've felt or thought the same thing!" So I acted, bought some gear and made my peace with the fact that this desire is with me for life, so I might as well enjoy it. And I do!

I felt secure in the newfound knowledge that tons of other 'normal' folks like me enjoy this activity too. It's a wonderful feeling to realize that us normal, feet on the ground tg's are the majority and that vocal minority drawing a paycheck from porn is an exception. It certainly did not seem to be the case at first glance.

Were any of you pushed off the path of acceptance back into jungle of denial like I was? If so, what pushed you off?

Does anyone else find the adult entertainment industry's portrayal of gender bending individuals off-putting, inaccurate and overemphasized?

Communities like CD.com make me feel good about who and what I am. It really is a shame there aren't more sites like this, and less like 'trannygangbangsurprise.com' which sadly is probably the name of a real site, though used here for a cheap laugh. Your thoughts?

[Kathi Lake]

Krista,

I have, like you, found some very ugly sites out there. This site is indeed a refuge from the smut and all that the world seems to think that we all engage in. As I essentially grew up before the internet existed (I am an old fart, after all), I didn't have quite the same experiences that you have. I had been looking for a place like this, though. I find it to be a place where I can be myself - and have a great amount of support and "Yeah girl, been there!" moments as well.

Kathi

[kellycan27]

Does anyone else find the adult entertainment industry's portrayal of gender bending individuals off-putting, inaccurate and overemphasized?



Sex sells, I think that same could be said for all groups,not just (as you called it) gender benders. The adult film industry rakes in millions, maybe even billion of dollars anually... so I guess not everyone is offended by porn or the way in which "people" are protrayed. Maybe they know something that we don't..... or just won't admit to.

[Lorna]

I can fully understand what Krista1985 has written. I, too, am much older and was very wary of the whole CD topic because, in pre-internet days there was almost no way of finding out how common or unusual my interests and behaviour were. There were a few magazines lurking in the sort of book/magazine shop I didn't feel comfortable going into - and at the sort of prices that shouted "exploitation". The internet changed all that by making so much more information available and allowing people like me to exchange ideas and messages with others without fear, without venturing into places I wouldn't want to go and without money being extorted. As Krysta 1985 rightly says, this forum is among the best places. I haven't bothered to look at the obviously seamier sites that are around: the lewd material simply doesn't interest me at all, but from time to time I become aware of just how much unpleasant material is out there and clearly that kind of image does CDing, for people like us, no favours.