Rare?????

[dunya]

Hey girlzz I have read allot here and it helped me realise so much....

Why am i posting here? because I feel that crossdressing isn't it for me.... but i am not sure of course.

As this is my second post here (still a noob)
I am an identical twin where my other half doesn't has GID feelings (really NOT). <<--- researches tell that one suffering from a GID could go for the full change.

I am left handed --- researches tell that must transexuals are left handed :S It this true? and how many of you girls are actually left handed?

My finger length (digit ratio 2D:4D) are mustly that of a women.....
>>>You can measure it for your self here: http://homepage.psy.utexas.edu/HomePage/Class/Psy301/Pennebaker/DailyOutlines/12Oct16Sex/DigitRatio.pdf


The first time I can remember where my brains reacted strange is when I saw a woman on a TV at the age of i think 5 or 6 and I thought to myself " I wanna be like her' . After this I ran upstairs and dressed. I got caught and from then on I feel so assamed. I knew that boys don't wear type of clothes somehow and behavoir etc. Till my age of 22 I got 7 times caught by someone and Now I feel like I will be get caught everytime I dress When I am alone at home.

So in conclusion I am 22 years old and i don't know what the future holds for me. I am now a frequent crossdresser who dresses allmost everytime when I am alone at home, borrowing clothes from my sister. Who finds woman so amazing (i am straight), Who gets headache from thinking about the past and the future about his GID. Who hopes to get things clear very soon so this won't consume my everyday life. Also is it weird to say that I admire transexuals (picterus etc.) on an erotic way (hormonal issues)?



Reading all of this what can you say about me?

I know I maybe need to seek for prof. help but I can't becuase of money issues and other matters. I know that on all the things I do or think or ask to all you girls that in the end ONLY I KNOW.

Thanks For all the help!
& i am sorry for my bad english and the.... long...... message..

[Karen564]

Rare??? Not here you not..
I understand your compulsion to dress as much as you can, because it feels good & you need to release your Ummm tension..
But I cant sit here and diagnose your exact condition or what you are or should be.. for that, you should be seeking the help of a qualified psychiatrist/ gender therapist to help you sort it all out..
So what your future is, I cant really say, but I hope you get some help soon so you dont continue to live in torment..

Where do you live?? Do you have a job??? Insurance of any sort??

[dunya]

Where do you live?? Do you have a job??? Insurance of any sort??

Thanks for your response you are GREAT! :)

- I life in The Netherlands
- I have a job at an wallmart which is part time because i am studing comercial economics at an university type of school right now.
- I have insurrance which basic with extra teeth and care i think (120 euro monthly).

The whole reason why i am not seeking help is because there is to much that we share at home to each other and my religion is muslim. Alllthough I am raised freely with no restriction of my religion I know that trans issues are a taboe in my culture.
Before taking steps when am more ready for it, I want to try to conversate with people on this forum. So I can realise and be certain.

Is it weird that I have feelings inside me that maybe in the future these feelings of my GID will get stronger. And as referred in my first post on this topic do I have a big chance that it could or is more then just the clothes, because of the facts that researches investigated?

Thank you!

[Empress Lainie]

Iran has become a very popular place for GRS, and it is accepted there, so I would think TS is not forbidden.
What they hate are gays and lesbians.

I know some of the girls I know I are left handed, but could not say with any certainty if it is more common or less common.

I do know that mtf's are TALL and ftm's are SHORT compared to the average heights. At 6ft I feel short around our group.

[Karen564]

Thanks for your response you are GREAT! :)

- I life in The Netherlands
- I have a job at an wallmart which is part time because i am studing comercial economics at an university type of school right now.
- I have insurrance which basic with extra teeth and care i think (120 euro monthly).


Thank you!

Awwwwww thanks :o, Your very welcome....:hugs:

Since you have insurance, I would look into getting some counseling then, it shouldn't be too expensive with very little out of pocket costs from you.

I'm not sure how your particular insurance plan works where you live, but here in the US, you can seek help from a psychiatrist (covered by insurance) for depression issues (caused by GID), and/or a gender therapist (also covered by most insurance) to help sort out your dysphoria and see what you need to do to treat it..
All treatments are handled confidentially, so only you & the doctor knows whats going on, your employer Walmart & your family will not know what your being treated for..
So that's what I recommend for you to do as a start..
and then go from there..

:hugs:

[Sammy777]

Welcome aboard.

I would be interested in finding out where you read about lefties. As I happen to also be one :D

[Veronica_Jean]

Hello and welcome,

I am right handed so I guess I could be in the minority. Many TS people have to find peace with their religious beliefs so you are not alone in that.

Aside from your own self realization, you really need a professional to make sure you are not experiencing something other than GID. I suspect most that get this far already know, but we also seem to constantly question what we know and if it is real.

Veronica

[dunya]

Welcome aboard.

I would be interested in finding out where you read about lefties. As I happen to also be one :D

here is a link about lefties
http://www.pfc.org.uk/node/784

and I am looking for a psychiatrist now.

It's true what veronica says.... we still search for answers which we may know actually.

I wished that there was someone here where i live who could help me. I had a neighbour who is a post-op transexual and admirred it everytime I saw her. Now she lives somewere else with her big sister who is really really hot :o. back then i did not had the courage to talk to her because of my status as a male persona.......

Thanks for all the responses!

[Empress Lainie]

I think I will check out our local tg group for lefthandedness.

[Kaitlyn Michele]

welcome!! :drink: As you can tell, you are not alone.

I was in the Netherlands for about 2 hours and all i got to see was an airport!! I'd love to go there someday..

anyway...you are very young and have your whole life ahead of you and by asking these questions now, you can take your time to find "yourself"..

One question you might ask yourself as you look for a therapist is how you feel about never being a man again...when you dress do you find yourself wishing you were truly a woman?

As I grew up, I dressed, loved women, felt very sexual about it and constantly looked at trannsexual women's stories, and wished and hoped that I could be a woman someday, just like you....but i was ashamed of it and threw myself into being a man.....

The feeling to crossdress doesnt go away, and the feeling of wanting to be a woman will not go away either and will likely grow stronger and stronger...thats why you are lucky to be thinking of this so young.

I don't think all those lefty/righty, finger size, elbow bend and other studies help because god forbid 95% are a certain finger size and you are not!!,...whose to say you aren't in the 5%.....

Only YOU know for sure!!! You said it yourself!!! It took me 45 yrs to figure that out!! and for you it was only 22 yrs..
I think that's great but there is an important 2nd part which is to ACCEPT what you know. This is a very liberating and wonderful feeling that may take longer.

good luck and I wish all the best for you!

michele

[M/F Dakota]

I am in a very similar position, trying to figure our who and "what" I am.

The finger thing was intersting, but it would be nice to have definitions of their types (E,S,N).

(My avrage ratio was 1.03 which would make me a type N, whatever that is.)

[Empress Lainie]

I don't believe that study, or else it doesn't apply to some of us. Gee, am I mistaken that I am TS? (Hardly!)

My ranking of credibility is:
1.(worst) used car salesmen
2.lawyers
3.psychiatrists (one was trying to con my wife into thinking he could cure gluten allergy with counseling at $125 per hour).

[deja true]

If you're brave enough to come here and ask questions, Dunya, you're brave enough to take on a lot of other tasks concerning your dysphoria. The Netherlands is an amazingly liberal country ... compared to many others, especially any Middle Eastern country. It is a certainty that there exists some personal help for you there, whether psychological (if you think you need it...) or social.

But for gosh sakes, dear one, please don't stress over whether you're TS or TG or any other combination of letters. Don't stress over what your culture has done to you concerning the guilt thing (said the fallen away Catholic altar boy!). Work on accepting that you have a gift, not a curse! And in the modern western world where you live right now, it'll actually make you a better human being, if you allow it!

Good Luck, Dunya! You're not alone in the world ... and especially in the Netherlands. But it is up to you to actively go looking for the help you need.

:)

[MJ]

keep reading i guess . but i am left handed and I'm a ts the finger thing is close too 3 out of 3 :straightface:

welcome to the forum

[Empress Lainie]

Michele, your comment about never being a man again:

I glory in NEVER HAVING TO BE A MAN AGAIN. That's because I never really was, just pretending to be unconsciously. Transition was like getting out of prison or a butterfly's cocoon. The butterfly is now my talisman.
I have butterfly bracelets one of which I always wear, butterfly necklaces, and butterfly pins, 2" across!