Does CDing make U feel guilty?

[docrobbysherry]

I realized from my "fetish" thread, that IT DOES with me!
And I THOT I was beyond those feelings!:doh:

I'm PRETTY SURE it's NOT the acts of putting on and wearing ladies clothes. Or, all the extra gear I use to create a more fem illusion, tho! I think of THAT as sort of a fun, exciting hobby!:D
Even if I may be a bit obsessed with it!:heehee:

My guilt seems to come from the fact that I get SEXUAL PLEASURE as a result of my dressing!:sad:

THAT makes me ANGRY at myself! That after 11 years of CDing, and nearly 2 years of sharing CDing on line, I should STILL feel guilty!? Why? :Angry3:
When my morning quickies in the shower don't seem to bother me at all?

And I'm frustrated! That I CAN'T seem to move past this sexual stage of dressing, on to just enjoying the dressing up and feeling fem, as SO MANY OTHERS HERE DO!:eek:

I can't help feeling there's something wrong with me! Why do I STILL feel guilty? Why can't I just enjoy my CDing for what it is?

Any help/advice/experiences would be MUCH appreciated!:thumbsup:

(Sorry! This thread may be MORE confounding than my "fetish" rant!):brolleyes:

[anda_mouse]

i feel the same way......wish i didnt.

[Joni Marie Cruz]

Hey Doc-

Love your rants, keep 'em coming, so to speak. My wife makes me feel guilty about how much money I spend on girlstuff, then we go out and get her some things and then both feel guilty that we spent so much money. So therapuetic, perhaps not in a productive way but I take my therapy where I can find it.

I guess like so many other internalized things we make ourselves feel guilty about it, no one else does, or can for that matter. Speaking for myself, though I think perhaps other girls here are or were the same, dressing used to be a highly sexually charged event, perhaps because I only got to do it very occasionally. Each time I dressed, whether it was full-tilt or only lingerie, it usually ended in an act of, ahem, solitary pleasure. Then everything went in the laundry.

Now my kinkiness finds other outlets, sometimes dressing is part of it and sometimes not. However, dressing in and of itself, is no longer so much of a sexual kick, though I do find it intensely pleasurable and satisfying. My suggestion is to just enjoy yourself, unless the guilt makes it more exciting. Sometimes just knowing that you're doing something illicit, like sex in public and stuff like that, adds to the thrill.

Well, thanks for giving me a chance to talk about myself. I love it. Perhaps someone else will come up with something more constructive for you. Have a great day, Doc. Love your pix.

Hugs...Joni Mari

[PaulaJaneThomas]

I don't feel in the slightest bit guilty. Although I wasted many years suppressing my desires and hoping they'd magically go away, once I started down the road to self-acceptance it felt right and I've never looked back.

The ones who should feel guilty are those who are prejudiced against us.

I'm not sure I can offer any helpful advice but do you ever go out en femme and interact socially with others?

[cdbethany]

i did go through a whole guilt phase when i was about 15 not understanding why i was attracted to "girl things" ,what attracted me to them.but once i hit 18 i didnt care anymore i liked wearing the clothes and they made me feel pretty cause lets face it im a fugly ucker.i do get sexual pleasure out of dressing infact i prefer just slipping on a dress and panties to masturbating anyday.it also provides emotion pleasure that i can be both male or female at my own wish anytime i want to.
so girls,dont feel the guilt and enjoy what you do and who you are!

love and kisses
bethany xxxxxxxx

[TGMarla]

No, not really. I accepted the fact that I'm always going to do this a long time ago. The only time it makes me feel guilty is when I crossdress at the expense of getting other necessary things accomplished.

[Lainie]

sometimes guilty, especially when a pink fog lifts. Partly it's a turn-on, partly it's just satisfaction with the role-playing game. The worst guilt comes from not having fun, not getting a buzz, just falling into the habit as an addiction.
But my goal now is to integrate dressing with being in public, maybe even being out to friends. How can I reconcile that with a sexual fetish? It makes me feel like flasher.
So I definitely suffer from gender confusion--not which genders I am, but what do I want to do, & why?

[Miranda09]

I don't feel the least bit guilty anymore. I used to when younger, but now as I've put more years on (I don't get older!!), I recognize that this is an important part of my personality. So when I dress, no matter what the reason, sexual fetish or otherwise, I enjoy it fully and be damned with the guilt complex. Life is too short. Live it and enjoy it. :)

[linnea]

As the years have gone by, I have felt less and less guilty about crossdressing and any of its activities or qualities.

[Carol A]

No, no guilt here as I have dress for 55 years and it's just who and what I am. I am happy for me and live life to it's fullest. :daydreaming:

[Noxvictum]

There is some guilt, but it's changing into more of "Holy S**t, I'm weird." Suppose a guilty conscience is the sign of a good time lol

[Raquelle C]

Used to, not anymore though. :D I am still young, but when I was younger it did make me feel guilty for doing something that I 'wasn't supposed to be doing'. That is definately not the truth, so have fun, guilt free..!

[Kokoro]

When i was younger espeically, yes. Now its more of a thrill to wear something forbidden rather than actually feeling guilty about it. I think that is something more to do with owning my own clothes rather than borrowing.

One thing i don't like is also the sexual pleasure side of it. I'd much rather just be able to dress and enjoy being dressed rather than having to relieve the pressure so to speak and then getting undressed because the good feelings passed along with the want to remain dressed. I feel guilty about giving in to that side of me, it just makes me feel perverted.

[kristinacd55]

I used to before my wife found out, now not anymore! Yippee! Yahoo!

[Joanne f]

There are two things that could be possibly going on , first of all you assume that society would take a dim view of you Cding in the way that you do for pleasure but this dos not enter your head until after you have done it as the build up to it puts it way out of your mind.
Secondly unlike the female body the male body go`s into a sort of shutdown mode after it has done what it needs to ( that is why a lot of men fall asleep after ):battingeyelashes: it go`s into a sort of low and that is when this idea that you have done something wrong will hit you .
So the answer is to stop thinking that society would look down on you if they knew.

[Jessica Who]

I used to feel guilty until I fully accepted myself. I have a love for myself and an appreciation for the crossdressing that I do.

[LilSissyStevie]

...I'm frustrated! That I CAN'T seem to move past this sexual stage of dressing, on to just enjoying the dressing up and feeling fem, as SO MANY OTHERS HERE DO!:eek:

Why does it have to be a "stage?" I've been stuck at entry level for over 40 years. So far, I haven't seen anything that would make me want to trancend to the upper levels of trans illumination. :brolleyes:

Like you I don't feel like nor want to be a woman. Unlike you, perhaps, I have a strong sense of femininity. I didn't advance to the "feeling feminine" stage. It was always there. I don't even need female clothing to feel that way. The clothes are just props for foreplay.

Sometimes, especially in the past, I've felt 'guilty' dressing up the way I do. It was mostly because I didn't like feeling controlled by irrational "urges." But, I get over it.

[VikkiVixen7188]

Its not that I feel guilty about it personally, its more that I dont know how other people will feel about it.

Im quite pleased with myself.

[Tracy_Victoria]

no for myself, yes regarding my partner.

As I have told her often if there was a cure, i'd take it, but as there isn't I have a need to do what I do, so no I don't feel I should feel guilty for doing something I need to do, but don't understand why I need to do it?

[iwearstockings]

well maybe the sexual stage of dressing is where you're arriving at and not something to be worked through. I mean, maybe thats how its going to be for you.
Me personally I have often thought about how it would feel to just dress up and go about daily life like that but then i always get so turned on by it that, after minutes or hours, one thing leads to another and then afterwards I just can't wait to take it all off and do something else. I think I have arrived at a point where thats the norm.
By the way its REALLY damn hot here in england for once and right now just the idea of wearing anything made of nylon , well its just too damn hot is all I can say, so I'm online reading about other people doing it instead ;^) x

[Sarah...]

Yeah. I keep having to buy man clothes for work and I can't afford it. So that makes me feel guilty. Time I stopped messing about, don't you think?

Sarah...

[tricia_uktv]

I did, but I reached a stage when I knew I had to do it, it was in me. So I did and am doing it now (well not precisely now). All guilt has gone!

[Gabrielle Hermosa]

...My guilt seems to come from the fact that I get SEXUAL PLEASURE as a result of my dressing!:sad:

THAT makes me ANGRY at myself!...

What? :eek:

So you get a sexual charge out of it - is that a bad thing? I think we all go through a masturbation phase. You either started dressing late in life and that phase is not yet over, OR perhaps you're a fetish crossdresser, period. If you are, does that bother you?

Do not confuse fetish crossdresser with "pervert" - the two are not interconnected. A pervert might also be a fetish crossdresser, but just because someone is a fetish crossdresser does not mean they are also a pervert - not even close.

There are a zillion fetishes out there. I think most people have a fetish of some kind. They may or may not share that outside of their sexual partner, but there's nothing wrong being turned on by [whatever] so long as no one is caused harm by it.

Don't give yourself a difficult time about it, Doc. There's no need. You'll either grow out of your sexual arousal when dressed phase, or not. If you do not - why be ashamed? If you go posting sex or genitalia photos publicly online, then maybe you should be ashamed, but I've never seen you do anything of the sort. You seem respectable enough to me. :)

Take it easy. Relax. Life is short - enjoy the things you enjoy and do not feel guilty for simply taking care of business when dressed.

[Sharon B.]

Same here at times feels guilty as HELL, other times no. When I do feel guilty is mostly in the summer months. I try not to feel too guilty about it but it does happen more than I care for.
Maybe if I would drop some other hobbies and move back into a apartment or a house in a subdivision instead of living in the country with some acreage to take care.
Then maybe start living full time as a woman I might be able to overcome the guilt and start going everywhere as a woman and doing things as a woman.

[Jean Ann S]

I think a lot of this guilt feeling is a carry over from past times when lots of us had little if any understanding of sexuality let alone CD ing
"If I dont understand this it must be wrong" ??
Why should we feel guilty for doing in private what is a natural human function ??
As far as CDing in public or private :
Why feel guilty about looking like a woman in dress or actions
Some of the nicest people I know as GGs
So to look like that should be considered an honor In some ways not all that different from those that dress as a cowboy ,, Biker ,,hunter ,,athlete to present in public
So I feel we should get out there more if anything and let the world see how we feel on the inside and what we enjoy

Jean Ann
:battingeyelashes:

[Fondew2004]

I realized from my "fetish" thread, that IT DOES with me!
And I THOT I was beyond those feelings!:doh:

I'm PRETTY SURE it's NOT the acts of putting on and wearing ladies clothes. Or, all the extra gear I use to create a more fem illusion, tho! I think of THAT as sort of a fun, exciting hobby!:D
Even if I may be a bit obsessed with it!:heehee:

My guilt seems to come from the fact that I get SEXUAL PLEASURE as a result of my dressing!:sad:

THAT makes me ANGRY at myself! That after 11 years of CDing, and nearly 2 years of sharing CDing on line, I should STILL feel guilty!? Why? :Angry3:
When my morning quickies in the shower don't seem to bother me at all?

And I'm frustrated! That I CAN'T seem to move past this sexual stage of dressing, on to just enjoying the dressing up and feeling fem, as SO MANY OTHERS HERE DO!:eek:

I can't help feeling there's something wrong with me! Why do I STILL feel guilty? Why can't I just enjoy my CDing for what it is?

Any help/advice/experiences would be MUCH appreciated!:thumbsup:

(Sorry! This thread may be MORE confounding than my "fetish" rant!):brolleyes:
When I am alone....no.

And I think I may have found a female who is actually encouraging me to dress. This is heterosexual to be sure (she is actually bi), but she's asking me if I would dress for her.

Is she kidding!!!!!!!!!

[Marisa_M]

I used to feel guilty in my very early days until I realized two key issues:

1) I was not the only guy in the world who loved to dress as a woman, and

2) I do no harm to others doing what I do.:love:

[cd_jamie]

I never felt guilty. I always felt relaxed

[docrobbysherry]

Thank u all, for taking the time to write so many useful annecdotes!:)


Partly it's a turn-on, partly it's just satisfaction with the role-playing game. The worst guilt comes from not having fun, not getting a buzz, just falling into the habit as an addiction.
But my goal now is to integrate dressing with being in public, maybe even being out to friends. How can I reconcile that with a sexual fetish? It makes me feel like flasher.
So I definitely suffer from gender confusion--not which genders I am, but what do I want to do, & why?

Thanks, Lainie! After reading your post, I realize CDing may be more of a BLESSING than a CURSE! Because IT IS such an enormous thrill for me!:o
Like u, I'm quite confused on where to go next with it!:eek:
Maybe the SCC conference will shed some lite on it for me!?


Suppose a guilty conscience is the sign of a good time lol

That may be the crux of my problem! I sometimes have these incredible "knee weakening" orgasms, and then the guilt starts!:doh:



One thing i don't like is also the sexual pleasure side of it. I'd much rather just be able to dress and enjoy being dressed rather than having to relieve the pressure so to speak and then getting undressed because the good feelings passed along with the want to remain dressed. I feel guilty about giving in to that side of me, it just makes me feel perverted.

I could have written your post, Kokoro! Because that's EXACTLY what I do, and how I FEEL! Only, U said it better than I could!:heehee:


What? :eek:

So you get a sexual charge out of it - is that a bad thing? I think we all go through a masturbation phase. You either started dressing late in life and that phase is not yet over, OR perhaps you're a fetish crossdresser, period. If you are, does that bother you?

Do not confuse fetish crossdresser with "pervert" - the two are not interconnected. A pervert might also be a fetish crossdresser, but just because someone is a fetish crossdresser does not mean they are also a pervert - not even close.

There are a zillion fetishes out there. I think most people have a fetish of some kind. They may or may not share that outside of their sexual partner, but there's nothing wrong being turned on by [whatever] so long as no one is caused harm by it.

Don't give yourself a difficult time about it, Doc. There's no need. You'll either grow out of your sexual arousal when dressed phase, or not. If you do not - why be ashamed? If you go posting sex or genitalia photos publicly online, then maybe you should be ashamed, but I've never seen you do anything of the sort. You seem respectable enough to me. :)

Take it easy. Relax. Life is short - enjoy the things you enjoy and do not feel guilty for simply taking care of business when dressed.

Thank u for that deep and conprehensive post, Gabrielle! You summed up what others have said, and A LOT more!:) Thank u. :hugs:
There's many things here I need to consider. And hopefully, make the changes I need to make!


well maybe the sexual stage of dressing is where you're arriving at and not something to be worked through. I mean, maybe thats how its going to be for you.
Me personally I have often thought about how it would feel to just dress up and go about daily life like that but then i always get so turned on by it that, after minutes or hours, one thing leads to another and then afterwards I just can't wait to take it all off and do something else. I think I have arrived at a point where thats the norm.
By the way its REALLY damn hot here in england for once and right now just the idea of wearing anything made of nylon , well its just too damn hot is all I can say, so I'm online reading about other people doing it instead ;^) x

Strangely enuff, IWR, I've NEVER considered that my CDing had reached it's penultimate stage! I'll reconsider that now!
Yes, I dress the same way u do, IWS. Except that I ALREADY KNOW what will happen at the end of my 2 hour session!:o

Maybe u need to move to SCal! It was about 78 degrees today. ( That's 26 Cent.) I was wearing my silicone suit with a corset under it earlier. I was perspiring, but that had more to do with my physical activities, than the temp!

[Marcy_in_hose]

I am dealing with some guilt over it. I have just recently realized that I am a crossdresser. I like doing it. I like feeling sexy and pampered. I am still a bit embarrassed about it and I figure that is where the guilt is coming from. My g/f had a bit of a suspicion I think even before I knew myself. She says she is OK with it and I am glad she is.

I know it will be a part of me because it feels great and opens up a deeper appreciation and understanding of women which can't be a BAD thing!

:)

[rachelgirlnw]

I revealed my "dark secret" to a therapist once. She shrugged, said "so what?", and told me about the movie Kinsey. It shows people of all ages and social status into a wide variety of sexual interests. The message? Sexual diversity is so common it is pedestrian. What I learned: don't hold myself to a higher standard than I do others. Also accept being weird (i.e. interesting, cool), not flawed. Keep it positive!

I wish you and everyone the best!

[Ðarissa]

I can't say I have ever felt guilty about it all, thankfully! I have certainly felt a number of other things but no guilt.

[helena.gcd]

I also feel guilty about crossdressing, specially the sexual part of it, but now I'm working on it. Accepting myself as I am, and finding out that am not the only one who liked it, is making a lot of progress with my guilty feelings.

enjoy yourself, you don't harm anyone :)

Hugs, Helena

[Jeanna]

I feel guilty about not telling my wife.

[gerdaberlin]

guilt has never played a major part here except when I couldnt manage to hold back my fluid desires, which works a lot better now, so no instant gratification anymore! This also holds up the energy to try out new locations, garments, public exposures etc, although now I am losing my hideout aptmt and have to be satisfied w only occasional cding in the near future. perhaps the day will come when the sexual part of it dissipates..__

[Annamarie B]

Personally I revel in the sexual pleasure aspect of CD'ing. I would guess that it's what got most of us into it, it's certainly what got me hooked! The difference now for me is that I can put off the end release phase and simply enjoy the female persona phase indefinitely. When I was a much hornier young Cd'er I often couldn't hold back. Guilt became a non-factor for me when I realized that I wasn't the only guy out there that liked to wear panties, and that happened a long time ago!

[Veronica Lacey]

Guilt. So powerful in the mind yet so impractical and wasteful in practice (to me.) I do not have an ultimately feminine personality inside so guilt still exists. I am a hetero male who simply learned to love dressing and enjoying sexual moments in doing so.

I do share your guilt of sexual pleasure being derived from dressing but not from dressing itself. I believe that my guilt in this way stems from the fact that my reasonably tolerant wife thinks that such an activity is ultimately masturbation and should be done alone. I also feel the guilt because I tend to enjoy being dressed and "gratified" probably more than making love simply because I programmed myself very early on that this was normal (and okay by the way.) I now enjoy both yet dressing is simply easier (maybe the guilt is from being sexually selfish, then.)

I also experience the guilt that Marla stated. When my dressing (and tying) prevent me from engaging every day "normal" life (not your exact words, Marla, just my own version) then I tend to get the guilt pangs. Not overly healthy but I accept them as a sort of check and balance feeling.

Being dressed for hours at a time is wonderful yet the session ultimately concludes in some form of sexual release. I sometimes think that if I dressed almost all of the time that eventually the urge for sexual satisfaction might dissipate. Dressing would become the norm rather than the hidden hobby. Same with being tied while dressed. Yet one could certainly argue that I would just be fooling myself. Perhaps I simply love sex, simply love dressing and simply love being a man all at the same time. With this in mind I try to keep both activities in perspective, that they are hobbies I like to entertain just as I do woodworking, poetry, photography or anything else that interests me.

So what good is it to feel guilty? Perhaps you simply need to state to yourself at these moments when you feel guilty, state exactly why you feel guilty. Does it just feel too good to be true? Is it because you want to do more with your life than exercise your female-dressing side yet still include it? Do you think you spend too much money on it and not enough on other aspects of your life?

Safe to say that you have a lot of support for your feelings. Perhaps a brief vacation from dressing is in order to help you sort this out? :thinking:

[immike]

I feel slightly guilty,because I like to enter mothers closet secretly,in a pair of suntan
pantyhose&try on all of her dresses,skirts,silky white blouses,shoes&heels&stay dressed
for hours,walking around the house,practicing walking in heels&sitting at her make-up
table and doing my hair and make-up

[Rachel05]

I used to feel incredibly guilty once over but now I just feel really relaxed and happy when I am dressed and never a hint of guilt anymore

[Ms Mira]

I don't feel guilty about the act of dressing itself. I've accepted that I am a crossdresser and that, to get the most out of life, I am going to dress up every once in a while... It will just make me happier.

I do feel guilty, though, when dressing gets in the way of my other goals in life. Like, if I have been dressing a lot, I have significantly more difficulty talking to women; I know, it's silly, but I can't deny that it's the truth. Maybe guilt isn't the right word for this, but I also often wonder what my friend's and such would think about me if they knew... And I feel more guilty, for not being a more typical male, then.

So, I guess that even though I tell myself I don't feel guilty about crossdressing, it's a lot more complicated than that. Often, there are these thoughts in the back of my head, whether I even know if I have them or not, that effect me.

[Sarah Doepner]

Sherrie,
This is a wonderful thread because it is so close to the core of our world. It is so very difficult to isolate gender and sex, regardless of our continual exclaimations that they are very different aspects of our being. Until we, as individuals, can sort out all those conflicting concepts there is a very good possibility of confusion and guilt. I know that gender and sex are different, but by gawd there are times when I look in the mirror and I know there has been a shift in the goal of my dressing. I may have started out with the plan to try find the best possible outfit and look as female as possible, but the fact that I am a man can't be ignored and rises to the occasion. Back in the day before my wife's cancer disrupted our sex life, there would be plenty of guilt associated with the sexual part of my dressing, but that issue is, unfortunately behind us.
The guilt is a result of that confusion and the occasional (frequent) migration of intent. While I can control my image and consious mind, the body responds as it wants. The other aspect of guilt has been addressed by Marla, Raquelle and others. When my dressing interfers with my responsibilities to others I should feel guilty and usually do.
Good luck in working through this. I don't experience a lot of guilt these days, but I'm human and it's still there.

[Rachel Morley]

Does CDing make U feel guilty?

Not any more. It used to when I was single and living alone. I used to blame it for the fact I didn't have a romantic relationship with anyone, and of course back then, my thinking followed that traditional bi-gendered BS way of thinking. After I'd gotten out of the clothes I'd feel guilty and say things to myself like: "This is not normal behavior for a guy" or "you shouldn't be fanning the flames" or "this can't be good for you if it makes you feel guilty".

However, I did the complete opposite of all of those. I continued to dress, I increased the length and frequency of my dressing, and I met my wife on a crossdressing forum. :)

For me, getting past the guilt and accepting that this will always be a part of my life and so I should enjoy it and even be proud of it, is how I worked it out.

[Celeste]

Hi Doc,My cding sends me into a sexual frenzy at times,but I really feel that its OK and that I shouldn't have to worry about what anyone else's idea of cding is.I like dressing to be sexual,that will always be a part of it for me.


There are others here who feel the same,we can have it both ways ,fun and freedom from guilt. Just because we change the type of clothes we wear ,shouldn't change the fact that we all have human sexual desires that need to be met,and it is my opinion that its not wrong to satisfy those desires when they come ,in either mode.

[CD Susan]

I nerver have any feelings of guilt over my crossdressing. Many years ago before I learned to accept this part of me I would have negative feelings about my dressing. I don't think it was guilt but rather anger and frustration over the fact that I was not "normal" like all the other guys I knew. I used to live in fear of other people finding out about my "strange habit" but that ended too after I came out to my family. Now I enjoy my feminine side with absolutely no regrets over it.

[Carly D.]

Why would I feel guilty.. or rather why do I feel guilty?? I can't figure out why I feel guilty when I wear.. or is it guilt?? what is it I feel?? why do I hide it?? why am I deathly afraid to tell anyone of my little secret?? the longer I don't tell it feels like if I tell "now" then it's gonna be hard to tell the person that I didn't tell sooner because of the negative reaction that I figure will come.. I know there are those who will say "but you don't know..." and yeah I don't know the reaction, but it is that fear of the unknown that keeps me running as it were.. I've thought of the good, bad and beyond horrible reactions to my telling and the worst case scenerio puts me in the "wish I never told" mode...

[Tasha McIntyre]

I never really had a guilt phase at all. There was certainly a deep confusion that lasted many a year.

The only guilt I have is that I kept the whole thing secret for so long.

Tash :)

[RobertaM]

I still have guilty thoughts,, its been the longest period without me dressing in a long time. 3 weeks.. and i have been very active lately last few months with my activities.

Why do I mention this,, Although this chill period was not planned it helps to add some reflextion to your needs wants and desires.

My dressing urges are changing,, i have gotten over the sexual stage about a year ago. Now i dress to express my femme side.

I feel guilty due to my time away from family when i do this,, Im dad and need to be at home,, i feel guilty for laying this burdon on my wife.

On the flip side,, being happy and experiancing dressing in public is absolutely mind blowing.
thanx for listening.
roberta

[5150 Girl]

Well,, I don't have feelings of guilt because I dress,, but I do feel sinfull when I look at my pics. The sin of vanity seems to overwhelm me.

[kasha]

I go through phases. And I've been going through a massive guilt phase lately. Some how I think I'm letting people down who depend on me. My whole world seems unsettled.

[PhillyGuy2Girl]

When I was younger, I kind of felt guilty just having the urge to CD. When I finally embraced my female side, no more feeling guilty. I'm still the same person and I'm proud of who I am.




Felicity :)

[CindyLouWho]

I feel guilty about not telling my wife. This is the thing that still bums me. That I didn't tell her for 3 years. Recently she said to me, "I don't care if you stink". I guess it must be love.

As for the sexual part, I had that when I first entered puberty but I never felt guilty about it. After a while I fully identified with the gender I was dressed as and and now I really don't even need to dress to realize my gender identity.

[Melissa Rose]

I used to feel guilty about it, but not any more. I realized it is who I am and came to peace with it. I'm sure there many more worse things I could do or be. So what if I like to look, act and smell girly.

[Jenniferpl]

no guilt, just reaxing and a clear mind.

[cdmindymi]

Very good post doc, thank you and all that has responded. I have learned and relearned some things here. I think guilt is like a stone, some of us just walk by and look at it, others pick it up and carry it a while before dropping it, and some never do let it go. That been said, I only feel my guilt about cd’ing when I look in the mirror in drab, and think about me cd’ing. I am in my middle 50’s and see some of my dad in that mirror. That’s my stone I still have to find a way to drop.


“ What I learned: don't hold myself to a higher standard than I do others.” Good thought Rachel.

Mindy :2c:

[ms.querade]

I used to feel guilty because I didn't have "stereotypically male" behavior. Now, I don't feel that way anymore. In fact, I'm somewhat proud of it because it makes me somewhat unique! I do, however, still feel a little guilty because I haven't told my friends or family yet.

-Ms. q

[sometimes_miss]

I used to feel guilty for wanting to be a girl, because so many people tend to believe that being a girl is easier than being a guy. After I figured out that wasn't necessarily true, I didn't feel guilty any more. I was aspiring to a better existence. I believed, and still believe, that women in general are nicer than men. I guess it's because they can be, without sacrificing any attractiveness to the opposite sex. I like being nice to people, and it saddens me that I'm considered less of a man because so many people, especially women, think a guy who does what other people like is a loser.

[Michaella]

Very guilty. Guilt over creating problems for myself and for others, guilt over not being in control of myself. Guilt over time and money spent. Guilt over letting something that should be so peripheral become so important.

And yet, and yet . . .

Michael

[Blaire]

Only when I find a bunch of sales reciepts...

I've learned to toss them quickly so I only see one or two at a time :D

[Jaclyn NM]

I used to feel guilty, but not so much anymore, and when I do, I realize that it's mainly because of what I think others will think of it, and not true guilt on my part. I also get a very sensual and sexy feeling from my female clothes, but I've learned to enjoy it, and hope it never goes away.

[Pauline Lauren]

I used to feel guilty about my dressing, and went through my share of purges and "swearing not to dress again". It was about a year ago that I started to really accept that dressing was really just a part of who I am, and that I should stop trying to deny it until the urge would overcome me and I would dress anyway. It isn't really so much a failure to control as it is an acceptance of ones true nature anyway.

As for the sexual aspect of it, I would never say I have "outgrown" it, it is still there to a degree. But my other reasons to dress have grown to be much greater than the portion related to sensual feelings over time, such that now most of the time I dress my thoughts are not directed that way. But that said, I don't see any reason to feel guilty about the fact that on occasion they are ;)

Guilt is usually not a good thing unless what you are doing is hurting yourself of someone else. If this is not the case, try to let go of it and just be yourself, and accept the reasons you dress as your own. We are all different, and have varying reasons for what we do. Yours are no less valid for you than anyone else's is for them.

>>>hugs<<<

Pauline

[JustAlex]

I used to feel guilty about CDing when I was a teen. At that time, wearing and sex were tied together. If I was wearing I knew how that was going to end. And the feeling afterward was to take it all off. It was a pain to put it all back in place because I felt bad to be touching or looking at the clothes I was wearing. And it was a lot worse when I had to clean stuff.

That kept me from wearing at times and also during long periods of time. Masturbation was a relief in a way because it took me to the place after wearing but the truth is that the urge to wear was still there. The preemptive feelings of guilt kept me from doing it.

The guilt comes from your perception that you're doing something wrong. Wearing and masturbating. At some point I realized that none were really wrong, they were things that I had to kept in private for modesty but they were not wrong and they were both good for me. They made me feel good and I didn't go blind nor my hands grew hair :).

It's just a matter of realizing who you are and what's good for you. Stop measuring up to other's standards. That's fine when you have to interact with others and certain rules have to be watched. But in your private life, your time, your space, it's only you.

I don't feel fine talking about masturbation so I'm making it short and simple. It's not that I feel guilt about it, I just think that it's something you have to keep in private. Even if you share with your partner, it's private between you two (or whatever the number is in your case).
I did it all my life regularly. I had and have a high sex drive and not always have the chance to have sex with my wife. Not only the opportunities are scarce, she can't keep up with it sometimes. We're not young anymore...
Wearing is not a factor for me because I wear almost all the time and I don't have the urge to masturbate all the time. I have to admit that it may help some time because I have stuff that it's designed specifically to create the mood for sex. I wear that mostly for my wife so masturbation is not needed then.
My point is that there's nothing wrong if you masturbate so there's nothing wrong with the things that put you in the mood. Would you feel guilty for watching a Playboy magazine? a porno movie? Or put another way, would you feel better or without guilt masturbating to a magazine or a porno? It's a nonsense.

[Erica K.]

I had some make me feel guilty about it last friday. It was a so called friend, more like a friend of a friend. I was at a birthday bbq & it was the first time I have been around a few of them dressed, my friends thought I looked super cute (I did too :heehee:). I even got read a gg on the way into the house by a neighbor who said to his friend, "homegirl lookin' fine!" I wont go into the details here due to moderation, but the friend of the friend made me feel subhuman with just one comment. If I wasn't so drunk I would have went home & threw away my outfit, and probably everything else (most of my clothes at this point). I didn't rejoin the party, I just went into my friends house (party was outside) & talked with a couple people 'till I passed out. I passed out with my wig on too, which I HATE!

Well, the feeling lasted a few days, and I had a panic attack mid week. I thought all this was not the right thing to do. "What the hell I am I doing?!" I thought. I called a friend, she calmed me down. I woke up & realized I overreacted & the comment that was made by that person was his own opinion. I'm just being me, too bad for him he can't accept people for who they are.

[Michelia]

I feel very guilty because of all money and time I have spent Cding. If I had known I was going to be out of a job, I still may not have been able to control it. But I try not to dwell on it. What's done is done. Lot of people spend lots of money on all kinds of things. I don't. I drive old cars and except for Cding I am pretty frugal.

I am now trying to work on a reward system. If I get certain things accomplished, then I give my CDing a little extra time and money. It has turned out to be a good incentive. But I think I have been very busy trying to make up for the past - oh well.

But you should not feel guilty about the sexual charge. Give thanks that you get a sexual charge from anything. A lot of people out there can't get a sexual charge out of anything. Some get it from really bad places. Enjoy!

I not longer get such a feeling out of it. But I love to dress. Also, I love to have sex while enfemme, so I don't know if that qualifies. At any rate, I have no guilt about that.

[Cheryl T]

I always felt guilty...but not about dressing.
I felt guilty when I was younger because I wasn't female.
I felt guilty when I got married because I hid it from my spouse.
I felt guilty because I would sneak the time to dress and it would detract from the time I had to spend doing things I should have been doing in our home to maintain it and improve our lives.

Now I no longer feel guilty.
My spouse knows all about my need and desire and fully supports me. I no longer sneak the time as I am free to dress whenever I please, so now the things I need to get done I do either as Cheryl or not depending on what it is as I know I will always have time to be me...thanks to my loving spouse.

[Rikkicn]

It used too for many years but with study and a fuller understanding and of course aging I've come to know that it's just me. That's who i'm. I have tons of friends that refer to me as she now.
It's takes work to get past the guilt part

[ashcrimson]

I think Ive never felt anything even remotely close to guilt about dressing like a woman. I actually feel I deserve to just wear whatever I want to wear as a human and people should mind their own business. I do respect the fact that it is a different case in the work place since what you wear is more like a uniform, so I really dont mind it there if I would be forced to wear mens clothing.

I think it is those who insult or bad mouth me and people like me who should be ashamed of themselves and feel this guilt.

As Ive always looked at it too anyway, dressing and appearing as a woman when I am a guy, what does that really change? I am still me, the way Id think, the way id feel, the way id make my decisions in life. Its just what I look like, not what I am, I mean I can wear a tuxedo but does that change anything?

[karennjcd]

The real guilt for me stems from what I've spent on this interest. Something I don't want to do is to add up all I've spent over the years to achieve the wardrobe I have now. And now that it's time to send a child through college, I may have my regrets even more. Will I stop? Would you?

[ashcrimson]

Karen, you can just stop buying more clothes for now. Dont think about it too much, Im pretty sure we all spend on things for recreation anyway, we all need some leisure, otherwise we'd all burn out. Just be mindful of your spending and not like miss your bills coz you bought a $200 dress when you know you have to pay for things.

[Frédérique]

Does CDing make U feel guilty?


No. Nada. Nyet. Never. Naw. Nut. Nah. Non. Nee. Nope. No way. Nein. Naa. Neen. Ndaga. Ning. Naheen. Ntax. Nou. Nono. Nay. Nit. Nne. Nun. Nann. Nej. Naa. Negative!!!

[Sylvermane]

I used to feel guilty about it. But I can safely say that i'm pretty sure any guilt had more to do with my parent's (and therefore my) religious choices. As I got older though, drifted away from their beliefs a bit and here I am. While I wouldn't specify religions due to the inflammatory possibilities I finally realized that if i'm feeling guilty about something that is such a strong internal driving force then I have to follow that internal force and not a religious influence. You cannot change what you are in you're heart, and if you have to pick... you're heart is the best choice.

Your mileage may vary...

[Tip or Ozma]

Not for a long time. My companion and I are comfortable with who we both are.

[NathalieX66]

I felt guilty and ashamed in the past. Now I am proud to have a dimension in me that separates me from the average Joe, and it has worked out fine.

I cannot say the same about my dad, who seems oddly preoccupied with movies like Mrs. Doubtfire, Tootsie, and anything to do with Monty Python.

[Nicole Brown]

Do I feel guilty, in a single word NO!

Why should I feel guilty for being me? Nicole is part of me, an expression of who I am and I am thrilled to be her.

Nicole

[charlie]

Hello DocRobby!
If your situation is like mine was, you are still dressing just for the sexual release. That all stopped for me when I started going out. Now I dress to look good going out....not just for myself in the mirror. The outfit, makeup, shoes and look is most important so that I do not stand out and am accepted by others. Get out and try it in some strange city where you will not be outed and known.

[docrobbysherry]

Thanks to u all for relating your experiences and feelings about CDing and guilt! There is SO MUCH valuable info and life times of experience in the posts above!:hugs:

After reading them, I feel SO MUCH BETTER about myself, and what I do:o, than when I first came out here, 2 years ago!

As a late "comer" to dressing, (just about 11 years now), I STILL haven't completely received the answer to this question:
why all of a sudden, dressing up like, and/or appearing to be, an attractive woman, is such a exciting TURN ON for me?:eek:

I know! That's a question that may NEVER be answered!:doh:

However, I get SO MUCH enjoyment from dressing, and so much SUPPORT here, I feel sure it's only a matter of time! Until I can embrace it, me/Sherry, and everything THAT entails!?:)

[Tina P Hose]

Heck, all things that I do make me fell gulity. Maybe I have some issues:doh:

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

The only thing that makes me feel guilty is when I let myself dwell on it at the expense of being productive. But that has less to do with my crossdressing and more to do with my willingness to let myself be distracted.

[BritneyLynn]

When I was younger I worried that I was using my crossdressing as a substitute for relationship(s) with women. As I learned more from various sources I realized that instead of being attracted to women wearing nice things I envied the way they can enjoy society's acceptance of them wearing things like makeup, earrings, skirts, dresses, stockings and heels. My public appearances wearing feminine things is constrained more by my concerns over people's reactions than guilt.

I've recently gathered the courage to visit one female cousin wearing medium size drop earrings, long nails and carrying a purse. She said she's tolerant of my presentation, but isn't sure I should appear with the nails at a larger family gathering next weekend. I'm still strugling with whether I should show up with the long nails. Compounding my dilemma is that I'm overdue for a fill (which I haven't experienced yet) and that I could stand to go job hunting week after next.

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

As I learned more from various sources I realized that instead of being attracted to women wearing nice things I envied the way they can enjoy society's acceptance of them wearing things like makeup, earrings, skirts, dresses, stockings and heels.
.

Ha. One of my GG friends joked with me once that whenever she saw me checking a woman out in public she was always wondering if I was checking out the girl, the outfit, or both.

I told her it was usually both.

[marisa]

i had some guilt when i was a kid. since then i have come to terms with myself and have done a lot of soul searching. i've concluded that this is a really big part of who i am. no more guilt. i just want to be me.

[danacd96]

Dressing, makeup, jewelry, and oh yes perfume, it all makes me very happy! Emotionally, Sexually, or whatever, its all good. Never guilty!

[rachelgirlnw]

Hi DocRobby,

Great post (obviously) with lots of responses. When a lot of us got into dressing, the sexual aspect was a *big* part of it. It was *so *taboo that it was a huge turn-on. It was a great introduction.

One question I consider is: now that I've come to some terms with being a crossdresser, would I want the sexual excitement part to go away? Would it be worth not feeling occasional guilt to no longer be sexually aroused?

I understand where you're coming from and what you're saying. Most guilt is gone today, but occasionally...

- Rachel

[Shelly67]

Good thread .
The overall cost of the entire dressing package has certainly made me feel guilty at times . It really hit home of late when I had a sort thru of my clothes and shoes . It made me slightly ashamed and concerned me so greatly alongside my recent unemployment ( which has affected me no end ) it had the effect of not wanting to dress . The desire came back with an almighty bang , but it left me feeling very shallow and not wanting to dress in front of my partner at all . My wife has'nt seen Shelly in the flesh for nearly 3 months now . She's even remarked on it .
Then theres the additional guilt. I keep this side of my life secret from my family . I can't imagine the look on both my parents faces were they to find out that the eldest son is a transvestite . Without running off on a tangent , the thought of that certainly fills me with angst , fear , and worry . It also makes me feel a little angry that I simply haven't got the balls to be me without the horrible image of rebuke and possible confrontation that would certainly develope amongst others who would eventually learn of a tranny in the family , or that guy they know who dresses like a damn pervert . I ask myself , why worry ? Live you're life for you . I then ponder and reflect that if this is why (although my partner knows ) I have'nt came out fully to the world and dressed outside of the home .
Don't get me wrong , I love feeling girly , enjoy the whole sensation of being enfemme , but at times I hate having this part of me which at times leaves me near to tears .............

[Samantha Kelsey]

Ask any person who masturbates on their own in secret if he/she feels guilty afterwards and I bet he/she does. I don't think the dressing is a big part of feeling guilty, no more than say using a vibro or looking at sexy pictures.
From early childhood we are taught not to touch ourselves in those "private places" it's dirty or naughty. When we do, of course we feel guilty.

Nor do I think that anyone who wears clothing (male or female) simply as an aid to masturbation is a crossdresser. Most people have some "aid" to sexual pleasure, clothing is just one. Would we call someone who uses a vibrator to help them a "Vibro"? "Oh did you know that lady is a vibro?" Of course we wouldn't, so why call someone a crossdresser just because he/she likes to get it off in a few bits of clothing?

I'm not indicating here in any way that you are or are not a crossdresser and I'm sorry (admin) if I drifted of the plot a little, just delete it and reprimand me if I have.

[PaulaJaneThomas]

From early childhood we are taught not to touch ourselves in those "private places" it's dirty or naughty. When we do, of course we feel guilty.

Woody Allen says masturbation is simply sex with someone you really care about :D

[JaytoJillian]

Guilty? No, not at all. It's part of who I am. My SO wishes CDing would make me feel that way, but I learned to accept it and embrace it.

[CharlotteW]

Guilty? Nope, just makes me feel like I'm having some fun.

[Lucy Long Legs]

Oh yes, I used to feel really guilty about it. I've got over this feeling now as I realise it does nobody any harm and it's just the sort of person I am and I am not alone, as anyone can see who visits here.
I still haven't had the nerve to go out but I'm not sure exactly what I'm frightened of. Perhaps being "outed" or laughed at or attacked. Or maybe there's guilt there too...
L

[CD Susie]

Sorry to bring up older post. I was actually in that guilt right now and searched the forums for a similar situation. I only feel guilty after the fact I've unloaded the pistol.

CRAP! Well I just basically with two sentences told you what I did tonight! oops didn't mean that, but o-well its straight forward. nothing to hide on this site.


Lets continue shall we...

Immediately after I rip all the clothes off and remove any makeup. Go back to being completely my male self. In fact sometimes I get pissed off and say WTF was I thinking! What will my friends think if they found out! Your a man, not a dress wearing little girl! I'm quitting tomorrow! My girlfriend has seen me do this and shes like...yea right liar...I'll see Susie soon

In fact growing up I went through those phases and I actually burned my girl clothes once or twice.:Angry3: The problem is weeks or months later I found myself buying more clothes. When I met my girlfriend I threw everything away, but this time something happened. I kept my heels. Finally a minor breakthrough. When I told her I was a CD I used the heels to show her I wasn't lying.

I think with me its an age thing. As I get older I seem to accept what I do more and more. The guilt after may only be a few seconds until I realize I'll wake up tomorrow or the next day with the same urge to do it again. Today I also have less to worry about. Back in my school days if anyone found out I was completely ruined! I was a sports all star and this would be frowned upon by my whole town. I couldn't put my parents through that. Most of their friends were my friends parents.

This same concept applies to so many sub categories...

CD's that don't want their SO's to find out.
CD's whos job is at risk if anyone knew.
CD's who's parents or siblings might be disappointed or even worse.
CD's who are afraid the neighbors might see in the windows and tell the neighborhood....trust me I keep my blinds completely closed!
CD's who are afraid thier pictures online might be seen all over and your male name posted on the description or worse your male photo. <<<I FEAR this

Well I hope I made sense. Thanks to this website I have also been able to subdue most of that guilt and in fact this site inspired my new purchases and some serious talks with my girl about where the future might go. Maybe one day I'll go outside dressed to a meet or eat dinner in a neighboring towns restaurant....

[Charis]

It used to. But as of the past year or so, I've been exploring a number of my fetishes within the context of the BDSM community here in the UK - let's just say that I've gotten to the point where I consider crossdressing, along with a number of other interests, almost completely "normal behaviour". I feel it's a healthier attitude to take, and I think I'm a lot better for it.

I certainly feel less guilty now, anyway. :)

[Dannigirl]

The only time I feel guilty is when the dog is staring at me and saying with his eyes "not this again, can't we go outside and play instead" ? I also feel guilty when buying clothes sometimes as I hate shopping for male clothes but love shopping for Danni's clothes.

[Patricia Jane]

There was a time when I felt guilty about dressing. No more. I feel good about drerssing and it is more natural than wearing men's clothes. I feel more relaxed and confortable when wearing 'my clothes" than the things I am supposed to wear. I have no problen wearing men's clothes when I have a job to do. But when relaxing I feel better in my girl clothes.:brolleyes:

[Angelofsomekind]

I used to before my wife found out, now not anymore! Yippee! Yahoo!

I was the same way, since she found out and started to enjoy it, the guilt kinda went away. I hadn't really noticed it though since it was a gradual thing.

[Nicole Smyth]

I feel guilty about my wife not knowing. I am scared about our friends and my family finding out. I enjoy dressing for all the same reasons that every other CD'er does.

[Shayna2008]

I don't feel guilty about the turn-on aspect anymore. I've decided that I enjoy everything TG, from the research, the transformation, fantasies, you name it.

[Toni_Lynn]

Nope .. it never has from way back when and and it never will. It is who I am and I rather like that.

Now there are those I have come in contact with who will (have!) readily accused me of feeling guilty about being a CDer because I don't take a somewhat more 'out' stance vis a vis crossdressing. To them, I say, I'm sorry deary, but as John Lennon said -- If you go carrying pictures of Chairman Mao, you ain't gonna make it anyhow.

However, there have also been those who have tried to make me feel guilty about crossdressing. To them I say -- in the words of Alex in A Clockwork -- I was cured, all right!

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[Karen__Starr]

I am pursuing SRS and feel guilty when not dressed. Any ways you should not feel guilty what so ever if this makes you happy.

[sherri52]

I lost my guilt about forty yrs ago. You could lose yours at any time. Next week, next year. WE are all different in both the way we feel when we dress and when the guilt goes away.

[Dayna3]

I do feel guilty, I'm not sure what it is though. Maybe the thought of being caught, as I think it would be very bad.

[angpai30]

I don't feel guilty because this isn't a sexual fetish for me, its more of a self acceptance and help mate for me to grow and become a better person.

Hannah~~

[Samantha Girl]

Most things I do that aren't A. Working on art B. Do stuff with and for my girl makes me feel guilty :p I do feel guilty about dressing up because it is sort of seperate from my girl, it has to do with the way we handle it I guess. I try to not have it in her face, but that excludes her ya know ;)

Obviously we've done stuff together with me dressed up, including sexual stuff. But that's been an every now and then thing. Put it this way, I want to be dressed as a girl far more often then she wants to see me dressed up. Sometimes I feel guilty because I want to do things that she'd rather I not do like I really want to shave my legs a lot. But I save that for special occassions, same with completely shaving my face. I feel silly sometimes dressing as a girl with a mustache! :p But I don't want to annoy my girl, give and take I guess.

I'm NOT going to feel guilty about Halloween though! My birthday's 3 days before so Samantha gets what she wants for Halloween every year! :cheer: Still CAN'T wait! 2 weeks! Shaving everything, making my hair as BIG & CURLY as is possible and wearing the hell outta my new outfit & red fishnets & black knee boots!!! Is it Halloween yet? :D

[KayC]

Guilt has a place in our lives to bring about needed change. Beyond that, when the thing that needed change has been addressed, it is no longer guilt hounding us, but shame. Shame only serves to hold us down and has no positive affect, so when it comes our way we need to send it packing!

That said, examine yourself...if what you are doing isn't harming anyone and you are living a balanced life, then what does it hurt? If your answers to the above are affirmative, then you should not feel guilty. If CDing kept you from spending time with your family, made you miss work, or caused you to spend more money than you could afford, then it is having a negative affect on your life and you need to bring it more in balance, which is what is true of any addiction. Anything carried to an extreme is in danger of being a negative. However, I don't see the correlation between feeling guilty and feeling sexual as a result of CDing. There are so many different reasons for CDing, not everyone has a sexual response to it, but what does it hurt that you do? Enjoy it, it makes you feel alive!

[Rachel_Red]

I suppose I ask this question a bunch these days. Everyone feels guilt for differnt reasons, I feel guilt because of the world around me. I've debated that perhaps the only guilt a CDer feels is not because its wrong but rather that the world around us dosn't always accept it and even tells us not to do it. We live in an odd world, animals don't have these issues but we do. I've asked why it is that one of my female german shepards can mount a male german shepard and its ok, its a sign of dominance. While a human can only wear specific bits of cloth based on what equipment they were born with. I suppose I'm taking the topic a bit to deeply but I think a lot of my guilt is from the fact that the world around me dosn't accept me and says that something is wrong when I know their is nothing wrong. Perhaps that is indeed the root of our guilt (those of us that feel it), its because its the forbiden fruite, the secret pleasure. I took a Sex Roles class a while back in college and we talked at length about the issue, about how boys are conditioned to be boys at birth and girls are as well. Well thats my guess anyways, funny thing is even if you know where the guilt is coming from it dosn't always solve the problem. Once you find that root you need to come to grips with it, if its acceptance then you need to seek it. Just some thoughts.

[jayme357]

I am intrigued with how many different definitions of the term "guilt" there are on this thread. It is pretty clear that each of us has a term that is meaningful for us and it is that definition that defines how we feel about ourselves. If guilt has to be part of us then I think this is goodness. The problem would be that there is no universal solution to our dilema. Oh my goodness - that must mean that as much as we are alike, we are all different! I hate it when I lean toward the philosophical.

I still struggle with the same issue. I am not ashamed or guilty for being a crossdresser. In fact if someone could wave a magic wand and make it all go away I would run and hide until the wicked witch was far away. Still. there are times........... I am blessed with an SO that loves me and supports me in every way. Yet she silently wishes it was not part of our life. Is it guilt I feel? I'm really not sure. I'm not sure I fully understand the difference in this case between guilt, discomfort, or some other term that I can feel but not describe. When we are socializing with our friends, all accomplished athletes, I develop feelings that I am in some ways diminished in her eyes because of who or what I am. Is this guilt? Or is there another, perhaps less critical term that might be a little softer and and more comfortable.

I simply don't know but I wish it would go away.

[Karren H]

No!!

[ArleneRaquel]

I would feel guilty if I didn't dress enfemme. :battingeyelashes:

[Rebecca Jackson]

I used to feel a lot of guilt in my younger days, but now I'm learning to accept that this is who I am and that it's okay. It took a long time to realize that just because society views this as wrong doesn't mean that it is wrong or that I should feel ashamed. Who's to say what is "normal".

[MissyW]

I did feel guilty when i was a teenager, but not anymore. As the dressing became a more permanent fixture in my life, the guilt subsided.

[Cathytg]

Feel guilty? I used to have serious feelings of guilt. Eventually I came to see that I was simply doing what came naturally and that I was harming nobody. And the guilt went away.

Sexual pleasure? You bet! There was a time not so long ago when dressing was always a sexual event and my good Catholic upbringing left me with awful guilt feelings. But in the past several years the sexual side has gone way down and the guilt from that has vanished.

Ranting is a good thing and you do it well. Your guilt might just vanish like mine did as you gain a different perspective on your dressing.

[danacd96]

I think you can see from my smile theres no guilt felt here!!!

[Desiree2bababe]

YEs, afraid so..........

[PatriciaT]

I used to feel very guilty. About 2 years ago I discovered the CD community on the Internet and saw the fine kind of people who are in it. I am now glad to be a member, and am no longer guilty.

[TorieGG]

I've always felt guilt is something our parents taught us to keep us in line. However as I've gotten older I've discovered you don't have to feel guilty about ANYTHING unless it hurts someone else. If your CD activities make you feel good and don't hurt anyone else where is the harm? There's no need to feed those old habits of feeling "dirty/guilty" about something that makes us feel good if it doesn't hurt anyone else. Life is too short. ENJOY!

[palover]

Yes your thoughts do make sense



I've always felt guilt is something our parents taught us to keep us in line. However as I've gotten older I've discovered you don't have to feel guilty about ANYTHING unless it hurts someone else. If your CD activities make you feel good and don't hurt anyone else where is the harm? There's no need to feed those old habits of feeling "dirty/guilty" about something that makes us feel good if it doesn't hurt anyone else. Life is too short. ENJOY!

[Daintre]

When I first started crossdressing, no I did not feel guilty, I felt all alone but did not worry that I was doing evil things. It was when I went to the library to find out about cross dressing that I became ashamed and felt guilty. The reference books I read all said that crossdressing was abnormal, the reference books were in the Abnormal psychology section. So for a 13 year old boy, this turned my world inside out. You have to remember that this was the prehistoric times, no internet, no one to turn to. I had a father I turned to and he thought he could beat it out of me...oh yeah....I felt guilty.

[Kasey66]

not so far.

[Barbara Dugan]

crossdressing doesnt make me feel gulity but I hate myself when I lied to hid it

[joaniek]

I've been cd'ing for many years - I don't feel guilty at all when I'm dressed. But when I'm not - lot's of conflict in the world I live in. Okay sometimes at home ... just happier wearing what I want to ... when I want. Only wife knows and she's pretty much ok - but because I feel so guilty, she's becomes uncomforable. If I get over it... she's ok too. So I'll stick w/ being lucky to have an SO who's in on my secret and doesn't threaten me w/ it.

[Alice Torn]

Because i never found a girlfriend matched to me, and am not attracted to most women today, i do feel some guilt, that when dolled up, i am more attracted to the lady in the mirror, than the vast majority of women. And, for many years, dressing ended in self release, then, immediately big guilt! Now, I don't have the sex energy, very strong, and often just dress, and take pics, then change, with no whoopy. The guilt from a lifetime of going solo, though, makes me wonder, if sexual shame, would keep me from being at ease, with a mate! Sexual shame, was big in my parents' families. Treetop Louise is such a dreamgirl, that, most women can't compete with her, in my eyes. However, i do notice many gg's, who put her to shame, but, i have no chance, to befriend, and date, and, even if i do befriend, have lots of guys competing for her, and, being low income, have nothing to offer. However, friendship with a real, charming attractive gg friend, humbles me, and i realize that i am a guy under the doll clothes, and cannot be a true lady. Acceptence is a big word. I have not dresses, in about three weeks. Both my parents, are not going to live much more, and both brothers are in jail awaiting trial a year from now. So, i do feel some uneasiness dressing right now. Great thread, Doc! Lots of intreresting posts!

[sleeplessone4u]

Guilty... yes and no. I don't feel guilty about dressing anymore. Mostly because my wife has become such an active part of this process and that she enjoys it. Before telling her, I felt guilty for hiding it and couldn't stand myself when I looked in the mirror or for the money spent purging clothes. I do have to admit that I also feel guilty because I'm starting to have strong feelings towards men and that my wife is interested in seeing me date a man. Go figure!

[BRANDI66]

Hmmm I don't think so, it makes me feel frisky :battingeyelashes::battingeyelashes:

[NathalieX66]

A CD'er all my life, then I tried to supress it for ten years, and failed...and now I'm back!
Guilty? No.
Life is way better now.

[Adelaide]

I don't feel guilty at all. It's part of who I am...and I'm proud of it!
A.

[Kinky with Ink]

Guilty? Not at all but nervous about my naughty little secret being found out? Yeah most definately...but that's half the fun after all.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

It used to, but not anymore.

JoAnne Wheeler

[Michelle-Leigh]

no way !!!!!!!!!

[Sallee]

Great thread does My CDing make my feel guilty I guess for a straight out honest answer YES maybe ashamed is a better word. I try to get over it, some people wife included knows about my dressing and I am fairly open about it,But the guilt remains. Is it the sexual overtones. that certainly has something to do with it. I suppose I could spend a fortune on therapy and I actually wish I could not that I need it but it might be enlightening. Maybe it is our old Victorian (puritan) values that are the problem and not our harmless hobby

[tanyacross]

I used to feel guilty but that was many years ago. Know I just feel good.

[charlie]

Hello Doc!
Getting past the sexual stage and going out will not take away the guilty feeling. I seldom find sexual gratification now and I dress and go out each and every time that I dress. I still feel guilty about making my wife unhappy. She hates the fact that I dress. I'm told that I'm "not normal" and in some way "sick". I think that because I have tried to hide this side of me all my life that I in some ways agree with her assessment. We can find all kinds of ways to feel guilty.

[CharlotteCD]

Sometimes I do, sometimes I dont.

[kateyliz]

No I don't feel guilty when I cd. I feel frustrated when I have to go back to drab tho. Hugs, Kathy

[CharlotteCD]

I feel frustrated when I have to go back to drab tho. Hugs, Kathy

I think every siingle person on here feels like that!