Ultimate crossdressing?

[Kate Simmons]

Sometimes we may reach the point wherein we have an equal comfort level with all our feelings both "male" and "female". That point can only be defined by we, ourselves. It's a point where the feelings are equalized and we are capable of being either, both or neither. It's a point where the term crossdresser does not really apply any longer as we are dealing with ourself as a person and no longer as a this, that or the other thing. In somes cases I think it may be easier for some to objectify who they are rather than making it subjective. Of course there is always the eye of another beholder who will classify a person and say:"He(or she) is crossdressing."

In any case, I think that such a thing as ultimate crossdressing is impossible. The reason I say that is because we are either the normal garden variety of crossdresser that perpetuates the bi-gender standard either consciously or unconsciously or gender itself has been equalized for us and we are either always crossdressing or never crossdressing, depending on our viewpoint. Those who have reached this point understand what I am saying.:)

[PaulaJaneThomas]

We should always be dealing with ourselves as one whole person. Anything else is simply self-dillusion.

[gender_blender]

I identified as bigender in college. I believe that it's entirely possible to attain, perhaps not without, at the very least, regular doses of female hormones. I find it's much easier to maintain an androgynous presentation in order to become either gender, a decision which I make everyday. Lately, it's been a female gender more often.

[Carol A]

Gee to tell the truth I really don't know as I am happy dressing as Carol as I have been doing it for 55 years or as my drab self.

I live with both worlds as he or she :love:

[suchacutie]

Well, you've tapped into my struggle, but I'm not sure that I can come to the same conclusion. Those of you who have read my posts know that Tina is an exploration of "his" feminine side. We've come to the current position that anything that crosses over the gender barrier simply confuses things. Ok, yes, it is almost impossible to eliminate every possible crossover since we share a mind and body, but by keeping the physical "sharing" to a minimum, and by speaking of the "missing member" of our trio as a third person at all times, we're doing better and better at finding out who Tina really is.

It's quite fascinating, really. My "he" and "she" seem to have different likes and dislikes. At the extreme, he is right-handed. It turns out that Tina is left-handed (I'm told that my grandmother "broke" me of being left handed when young, so this isn't so crazy!). He's a bit of a slob at times but Tina is incredibly neat. He and she read different books, watch different movies, on and on and on. There seems to be a never-ending list of things to discover about the two of me!

So, for me, crossdressing is not the notion of becoming androgynous but becoming separate.

Interestingly enough, learning what it is to be feminine has more than sharpened the good and the bad about what it is to be masculine.

The ultimate crossdressing to me is to be immediately comfortable in either of my very separate genders.

tina (and him too!)

[Jessica Who]

Interesting argument, I still feel that internal struggle of gender within me, I hope to find a balance someday

[PaulaSF]

I, too, feel a comfortable "stasis," in being comfortable, and enjoying, both my femme & male sides...

A Yin & Yang combining of both parts (tough to say "halves," as fluidity has that "dividing percentage" changing over time).

My gender therapy, about a dozen years ago, when contemplating fully transitioning, was a great help in opening my eyes to integrating both aspects, into a single, fulfilling life.

Have had both pre, and post, op TSes that I've dated, point out how, in some sense, they miss the ability to go back and forth, and to be both comfortable, and enjoy themselves as both a gal & a guy. Other comments from those women have also made me appreciate the glamor & getting all dolled up (certainly a "weak point" for me ;-) factors also tend to diminish, once full-time (i.e a chore/work, not something "fun" and perhaps a pathway to our "dresed down" mainstream society?)

I suspect that one's take on this topic will be a function of one's true gender sense of self, as well as what point in life they're at... (For instance, I could envision myself as full-time, and with breast implants, late in life, after retirement, whereas that's not on the table for 20 years, or so, and I fully realize how my attitudes & thoughts have changed over the past 20, but I'm thinking the intial gleaning of one's gender & sexuality are the biggest ones...)

Perhaps "ultimate" means we can enjoy our femme selves fully, and feel happy and comfortable, while out & about, en femme, yet not "despising" reverting back to boy mode, to tote that briefcase or lunchpail, Monday thru Friday, that underwrites those MAC makeup, Christian Louboutin, and Hermes purchases that help establish our femme sense of self:2c:

cheers,
Paula

[Kate Simmons]

Well spoken Paula. You understanding the gist of what I am getting at.:)

[Deb The Brunette]

My gender therapy, about a dozen years ago, when contemplating fully transitioning, was a great help in opening my eyes to integrating both aspects, into a single, fulfilling life.

Paula

My therapist gave up on me (see signature) dunno where that left me really, I'm not confused at all


.

[MissConstrued]

That all seems more confusing than enlightening.

I'm just a guy who likes to dress like a girl sometimes. No more, no less. I don't have an "alter ego," I don't have a "female side," and what I'm wearing damn sure doesn't change my worldview.

It's a quite Zen-like simplicity, really. It's far simpler than trying to invent deep-seated psychological excuses for enjoying a pleasurable activity. Are there some? Maybe. But I don't care. I'll just keep doing it, because I like it -- and for no other reason.

And here I thought *I* was confused... but that was before I came here. :brolleyes:

[Ralph]

Allow me to translate, MC. This is another thread saying "The term 'Crossdresser' doesn't apply to me because I have transcended all sociological and biological gender distinctions... now where did I put my bra?"

I particularly liked the final tag telling us if we don't get it it's because we haven't "reached that point yet". Yeah, and if you can't see the emperor's new panties it's because you're not enlightened enough :rolleyes: .

[Kate Simmons]

The bottom line is that it is what it is. If others don't want to think about it, that is their choice. Far be it from me to rain on anyone's parade. I do feel it's time to finally move on though. Take care everyone and be happy.

[Dekka]

To me, the ultimate crossdressing is when you dress and don't have the feeling that your are crossdressing. You are just putting on clothes. Your clothes.

[docrobbysherry]

That all seems more confusing than enlightening.

I'm just a guy who likes to dress like a girl sometimes. No more, no less. I don't have an "alter ego," I don't have a "female side," and what I'm wearing damn sure doesn't change my worldview.

I'll just keep doing it, because I like it -- and for no other reason.
:brolleyes:

Like MC, I really have no concept of a fem side. Yet, I FEEL there is more to my CDing than just sexual excitement! :D

One day, to hope to have the REST of it revealed to me!:brolleyes:

[MissConstrued]

Yeah, and if you can't see the emperor's new panties it's because you're not enlightened enough :rolleyes: .


Ya know, fairy tales and fables are great for teaching kids profound lessons... I can think of no other tale that had such a profound impact on my character. The sad thing is, it gets me in trouble everywhere I go. Everyone wants to ooh and aah over the emperor's new panties soooo badly.


<------ El-MissConstrued-Bo, America's Bullshit Detector. And did I mention, a transcendent being of pure benevolent orgone energy? :D

[Kate Simmons]

Whatever you say MC. You seem to have all the answers. Have fun with the Forum.

[MissConstrued]

Whatever you say MC. You seem to have all the answers. Have fun with the Forum.


What, you're not gone yet? :tongueout

[lingerieLiz]

Intersting. Through the years I have worn many exteriors. Many have know my various dimensions and have stayed the course. I am who I am.