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Deborah
07-12-2005, 01:34 AM
I'm enrolled in college working on my bachelors degree (4yr) in computer systems. One of the classes i'm enrolled in now is called Critical Thinking.
My first paper is to write a 2-3 page essay on which group of people i put myself in. The paper is on Assumptions. I have to write on how i feel about being in this group and what others think of me. :D
Well my first thought was of course TS which the instructor happened to have listed as one of the choices.
My problem though is i've never "Outed" myself. I asked the instructor what the Privacy Policy is on these papers. She says no one else will ever see them.
What do you think? Should i finally let go and "Out" myself. Granted she's the only one who will read it but, it seems a big step to me.
On the other hand i would love to write about all the things i've gone though as a transgendered person. I know what other people think of "us" girls for the most part. So it should be easy?

edit spelling

Julie
07-12-2005, 02:03 AM
Amy,

If the teacher will honor her privacy policy and you feel comfortable with her knowing I say, "Why not?" You will get a chance to express all those things you've been holding inside and the teacher will get an education she may not otherwise get. And since she put TS on the list I'd say it's safe to assume she's already interested.

If it were me, I'd do it.

Deborah
07-12-2005, 02:07 AM
Amy,

If the teacher will honor her privacy policy and you feel comfortable with her knowing I say, "Why not?" You will get a chance to express all those things you've been holding inside and the teacher will get an education she may not otherwise get. And since she put TS on the list I'd say it's safe to assume she's already interested.

If it were me, I'd do it.

It definantly seems to be worth doing. I'd love to get off my chest that which i don't normally tell people. Here is different because we all have something in common and there is no fear.
I will probably do it. Gathering all my thoughts and categorizing it all may be the hard part.

Tristen Cox
07-12-2005, 02:34 AM
I agree with Julie. Go for it :thumbsup:

RachelDenise
07-12-2005, 04:56 AM
I would do it as well. Teachers in college have too much to do than worry about which student wrote what. They are more concerned with the quality and grammar of the paper. Besides, maybe she is looking to meet someone like you!!!! Be still my fantasy heart! :p

Stlalice
07-12-2005, 05:14 AM
Amy,

One of the things you will have to face if you decide to transistion is "coming out" to the people around you. Given what you have put in your posts about possibly coming out and seeking help/assistance at your college this may be as good a place to start as any. The advantage you will have doing it this way is that you get to make a praciice/trial run with someone who if they have a problem with the idea isn't a huge loss to you personally. Two things to remember - one - you have already taken the hardest step in "coming out" to and accepting yourself for who and what you are. Two - as you come out to more people over time it gets easier to do - the first ones are always the hardest. I would agree with Julie and Tristen on this one - go for it. As for a format - the book "Trueselves" by Brown and Rounsley has some examples of coming out letters that might help - I would recomend a coming out letter as a format for your paper. :D

Clare
07-12-2005, 06:06 AM
I agree with the girls, here is an opportunity you can't pass up!

As i'm a current Uni student myself, i know what your letting yourself in for from the XDR point of view. Just keep focussed on the criteria of the 'critical thinking' class format.

I wish you well in both your studies generally and the TS assignment. Go on, be adventurous!!!

Christine

Rachel_740
07-12-2005, 02:00 PM
Amy,

In my experience of further education, it may be your immediate teacher who reads and marks your paper, but be a little bit careful because the examining board can ask to see any work produced, and I wouldn't be surprised if it is marked by your teacher and then the marking assessed by her superior, or head of department/year or whatever.

However, it may (if you have the confidence) be a good starting point to letting the world know about yourself.

Anne

Deborah
07-12-2005, 02:35 PM
Well thank you all for your advice. I feel it will be a great opportunity to write about it. Its a 2-3 page excercise and i would probably exceed that ;)

The alternative would be for me to right about being a country person and constantly being referred to as a redneck. That doesn't sound like much fun. :D

Forgot to add----I'll host my paper on my website (if i can get it to work) So that you all may see it if you wish.

Marla GG
07-12-2005, 06:22 PM
Hey Amy,

I was a college teacher for several years and taught a critical thinking class. I can tell you that not only I, but ANY of my colleagues, TG-aware or not, would have been excited to see a thoughtful paper like yours. In general I feel that college teachers make it a habit not to judge the content of student essays. You wouldn't believe the personal things that students often reveal in their papers--teachers have seen it all, and they tend be respectful of the very diverse views that students bring to the table. I would also believe her when she says she will keep it confidential.

Obviously this is a very big decision for you but I just wanted to say, if you are so inclined, then go for it.

Just my 2 cents 0.02

Deborah
07-12-2005, 06:32 PM
Ty Marla. :hugs:

Critical thinking teacher hmmm. If i need some tips or advice for class may i ask you?
Instructor will probably answer them all ,but i could always use a backup plan. :D

Marla GG
07-13-2005, 08:45 AM
Ty Marla. :hugs:

Critical thinking teacher hmmm. If i need some tips or advice for class may i ask you?
Instructor will probably answer them all ,but i could always use a backup plan. :D


Sure Amy, any time. Tips, advice, a shoulder to cry on, whatever. :) Good luck!

Chrissycd
07-20-2005, 12:58 AM
Amy. Write the paper, honey. You want to, you have permission, and believe me, your prof will respect you for making yourself vulnerable in the name of taking an honest approach to the assignment.
Hugs,
Chrissy

Deborah
07-20-2005, 01:00 AM
The group that I would classify myself as being part of is that of the transgender. I have felt different from the other boys since I was young. I wanted to play with dolls and dress up, but adults always steered me away to playing with boy toys such as cars and army men. I gave in for a long time and went along with what everyone was telling me so that I would avoid conflict. Eventually when I turned eleven I started wearing my sister’s clothes. Oh how natural it felt. It seemed normal to be dressed up. The time would come when I had to take everything off and be “Normal” very upsetting.

Realizing I would never be a girl (at this time I didn’t know about hormones or sexual reassignment surgery) I joined the army at seventeen in the hope it would make a man out of me. Naturally, this did not work, as the feelings were too strong. I hid my true inner self-deep down as the military frowns no this sort of behavior.

Years later I met a women who I liked and asked her to marry me. One of the many reasons was again hoping it would make me normal. Another failed attempt.

Nine years later, we were divorced. She did not like my femme behavior. She would say, “I’m not a lesbian.” Therefore, I let her go. She was my best friend so I did not fight it.

Recently I have gave in and realized that I am a female in a male body. I do not know if I plan on any changes yet as there are innocents involved.

The only positive aspect of my situation is that my parents have accepted me for who I am. I am grateful that they do not disrespect my feelings.

Deborah
08-09-2005, 11:50 AM
The public I believe have not any positive thoughts about people like me. It all rests on the negative in my opinion.

We are considered deviants, perverts, sick or faggots. I think people in general especially the male population views the female sex as inferior. Any attempt to look like a female automatically makes you inferior in their minds.

Genetic girls I believe know this. Females acting male are called “tomboys” or “just one of the guys.” This is found to be acceptable. Males even think that the female is trying to improve herself.

A female now days are able to wear anything or act how they want to and it is generally acceptable. I find this upsetting and intolerable. Through research, I found that the default sex at birth is female. Therefore, in my opinion females should be the superior sex.

A theory on why people like me exist has to do with not receiving enough testosterone at birth. If this is indeed the case then it comes down to science not preference.

If a male wants to dress up or wants to be a female, they are ridiculed, teased or in a few rare cases murdered by someone who finds this behavior unacceptable.

It is a sad world and upsets me that a group that I happen to fit into is thought of in such a negative light. I think most of the bad images people get of the transgender come from television or other media.
We are show as the bad or deviant people so that is the perception that everyone assumes to be correct.

Rachel_740
08-09-2005, 02:43 PM
The public I believe have not any positive thoughts about people like me. It all rests on the negative in my opinion.

We are considered deviants, perverts, sick or faggots. I think people in general especially the male population views the female sex as inferior. Any attempt to look like a female automatically makes you inferior in their minds.

Genetic girls I believe know this. Females acting male are called “tomboys” or “just one of the guys.” This is found to be acceptable. Males even think that the female is trying to improve herself.

A female now days are able to wear anything or act how they want to and it is generally acceptable. I find this upsetting and intolerable. Through research, I found that the default sex at birth is female. Therefore, in my opinion females should be the superior sex.

A theory on why people like me exist has to do with not receiving enough testosterone at birth. If this is indeed the case then it comes down to science not preference.

If a male wants to dress up or wants to be a female, they are ridiculed, teased or in a few rare cases murdered by someone who finds this behavior unacceptable.

It is a sad world and upsets me that a group that I happen to fit into is thought of in such a negative light. I think most of the bad images people get of the transgender come from television or other media.
We are show as the bad or deviant people so that is the perception that everyone assumes to be correct.

Amy,

I've been thinking the last few days about acceptance by people, looking back on the last 7 months since I transitioned. I've been thinking about the general acceptance level I've had from GG's and guys. I've been thinking about the people who have problems with my transition.

Generally, I have been accepted as female and most people I come into daily contact with don't have a problem with me. However, there are a few GG's who don't speak to me now - not even to pass the time of day, and there are a few guys who have a problem with me as well, either (in a very cowardly way, so I can ignore it anyway) ridiculing me, or (apparently) refusing to accept my adopted femme name. In my mind I can understand a bit why a GG should have a problem with me - because I am invading their sacred female space and areas (that's the way I see it, perhaps some of you GG's on the forum can comment on my thoughts here). As for guys having a problem with me, I can't really understand that at all. The only conclusion I can draw on them is that they feel I'm challenging THEIR macho image and they feel they have to challenge me back by ridicule. This is refering to my work environment, where people have known me for years and change inevitably takes time anyway.

I seem to have got to the point now in my looks and mannerisms where I seem to be accepted as a woman and VERY few if any people in the street take any notice of me. I went down the pub a few days ago with my nieghbour (the pub she works in) and she introduced me to some of her colleagues. None of them (male or female, mainly aged early twenties) questioned (either then or later) with her if I was a guy or not. They just accepted me as female and treated me as such. Also, I went to look at another house last week, and the landlady there accepted me fully as female, even confirming that my children live with their dad when I told her where they live.

I know we are in different countries, and looking at recent postings in sounds like the UK is more accepting of transexuals than the US is, but it isn't all bad when you transition. As time goes on and you become more comfortable with your new self and your appearance becomes more feminine (there is no way you can look male today and female tomorrow - changes DO take time). If you make the decision to transition take things day by day, have a good counsellor, and just be yourself (your new self).

As I said ealrlier, I transitioned 7 months ago now and I'm 98% comfortable (I do still have the occasional nervous bout) and I'm happier than I've been since I was about 7/8 years old, when I realised something wasn't right. I can remember at that age over a matter of days/weeks I went from being an ordinary happy boy to being very unhappy and withdrawn.

Sorry about waffling, I didn't mean for this to be so long.

Anne