Embarrased!

[AmberDay]

Here is something to make you laugh.

A few weeks ago, I recieved a letter from my job informing me that it is time for my biyearly physical. I am a busdriver and am required to be certified by the Department of Transportation to maintain my CDL. Note that the date on my letter told me that it was to take place Thursday, July 22, 09. Also note that Thursday is actually the 23 and Wednesday is the 22.

So I go into work today 'underdressed' (wearing black knee hi's and satin panties) like I do most days. I walk over to dispatch and ask for my schedule board, but my supervisor tells me my run has been filled because I am due to go for my physical. I tell him that it isn't until tomorrow. I had the paper in my work sack and I look at it and it says Thursday. Then I noticed the discrepancy that the day/date didn't match up. I stood there starting to sweat.

My supervisor laughed and told me that I should enjoy a couple of hours paid to sit at a doctor's office. I normally would. He told me to jump in the van so they could take us (me and five other drivers) to the medical office; they were leaving right away. So along the way I kept thinking how I was screwed. How am I going to explain this to the nurses and doctors? When my coworkers find out it is going to spread like wildfire and I will be fired.

Once we get there I asked to use the bathroom (so I can take off the knee his) but was told no since I have to take a drug test. Great. All the other drivers are joking and talking about dumb passengers they had lately and all I could do was tremble and think of a way to lessen the impact. Then the nurse started calling us back one at a time. I got really lucky because I was the last driver called back into the examination room. All the other drivers moved on to other parts of the office with their nurses.

I walk in right behind her and she tells me to take off my shoes and stand on the scale. I acted like I didn't hear her and just stepped on the scale without taking my shoes off, but that didn't work. I had to take off my shoes. I briefly thought of trying to come up with some sort of story to explain why I was wearing women's knee hi's. The only thought that came to me was that it was laundry day and I was out of black socks. I realized that wouldn't work at all; especially since my toe nails were painted red. Then I thought of saying my daughter was playing around the other day painting the family's toenails and just didn't take it off yet. Then I thought of my shaved legs. Screwed

I don't have a problem with people knowing I shave my legs; I even wear dress shorts at work and nobody ever says anything. But when you combine shaved legs with knee his with painted toes and satin panties, there is no story or reason to come up with why I was wearing them.

So, I take off my boots and step on to the scale. The nurse just stands there and doesn't move staring at my feet. She then starts this high pitch wheezy laugh. And laughs. And laughs. And laughs. She composes herself long enough to write down my weight and then steps out of the room laughing even harder. I take this time to remove the knee his, but the damage has been done. I hear her telling another nurse what I was wearing and about my toes. An 'oh my god' and more laughter ensues. She comes back in and takes my blood pressure and pulse (which are both very high for some strange reason) and does the rest of her part of the exam (eye, ear, BAL). I am asked to put my boots back on and walk to the next room for my drug test. Lucky for me so far is that I don't see any of my coworkers anywhere.

I walk into the next area and the women start snickering at me. I am really irritated and finally made the comment, "Like you never seen that before." (I know ER nurses have to see stuff like that all the time) And they say no, they haven't. Well I give the pee test and walk into the doctors exam room. The nurse tells me to disrobe down to my underwear and put on a gown that she hands me.

Yeah, right. I am wearing ivory satin panties! Another thing to cause embarrasement. I go commando. I hide the panties in the pocket of my pants folded in the chair. So the doctor comes in with an already disgusted look on his face (Guess he was forwarned). Not even a 'hello' he tells me to stand and he does the cough thing, tells me to move my arms this way, that way, bend over, walk on my toes, etc. And then tells me that is all and to get dressed.

So I get dressed and with great reluctance I check out and walk in to the waiting room expecting my coworkers to start laughing at me, but they don't say a thing, even on the way back to work. Guess they didn't know because they definitely would have been having some fun at my expense.

So now here is where I am worried. I know that there are laws about confidentiality, but I don't know how they all apply. I don't hide myself at work. I wear pink stud earings and shave my legs. I grow out my fingernails. But I don't come out and declare I am a crossdresser at work. They have to tell my employer the results of my phsyical, but are they going to mention my crossdressing?

There is a law in Ohio passed last year that makes firing somebody who is transgender illegal. So if the nurses tells my bus company that I crossdress they can't fire me for being trans.

However; Ohio is an at-will employment state, which means they could let me go for any reason other than discrimnation. They could fire me because I ran one minute ahead of schedule three weeks ago or for some other BS reason.

Yes, I am Union, but I hope I don't have to count on them since I heard some Union officers making fun of crossdressers. Also to point out that there was a busdriver in Los Angeles who was fired for being a crossdresser and that was deemed justified, "for his own protection".


Guess I'm not wearing knee his to work anymore.

Amber

[TJ Tresa]

Honey I don't think you have anything to worry about. they can only report the physical health issues noting else. So I wouldn't worry.
Good luck, and please be careful.

[O2B Barbara]

What a nasty thing for the nurse(s) to do! I would think there is some lack of professionalism here as well as a lack of maintaining your confidentiality?

I would think the job is safe as the knee highs & toes have nothing to do with your health and CDL.

[Maria in heels]

I hope that all goes well, and no one from that doctor's office discloses what they saw. Yes, privacy is very important, and the nurses definately acted in an unprofessional manner. I don't think that they were even nurses now...probably just technicians, which would explain why and how they acted. Yes, we all need to be careful, because the ridicule that we can experience, and its too bad that the doctor was unprofessional as well...or, if we give him the benefit of the doubt, he just is a grumpy guy with no personality. The best thing to do is watch...then, if somehow it "leaks out" about your toenails, then by all means, go after the doctor, not the nurses/techs - ultimately, it is the doctor who is responsible for his workers, and I'm sure that, with the right lawyer, you can make sure that this does not happen again. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that nothing comes out of this...

[luvSophia]

I'm pretty shocked about the very unprofessional actions of the medical people there. My understanding of the CDL regs and the physical is that the only thing your employer should be told is pass/fail, not the specific results of your exam. If anything should get back to your employer or co-workers about what was seen during the physical that would be a serious violation of the HIPAA laws regarding patient privacy.

[Lois Page]

I agree with Sophia. What happened in the examination room stays there. Only factual medical information should be in your file. Any breech of this confidentiality could subject the doctor and nurses to a lawsuit. For the same reason, it's unlikely that the bus company will learn of your underdressing. I'd go back to wearing knee highs if that is what you enjoy. But you may want to think about what to wear when the next exam comes up. I had a similar incident at a doctor' office a few years ago. I had gone in for a shot (tetnus, I believe) that I thought was given in the arm. Nope. Had to drop pants and black Bali panties, so the nurse could administer the shot in the derriere. Nothing said afterwards, so I came out OK.
Best regards,
Lois

[robyn1114]

Now that's just rude

[Andy66]

Oh my. The problem with some doctors is they are cheapskates and will hire young, immature office staff who usually aren't real nurses because they can be paid less. :( Obviously the quality of care suffers. In this case, it sounds like the doctor is a jerk as well.

The doctor and his staff can ONLY share information that is relevant to your care, and they can ONLY share it with people who need to know for legitimate reasons, such as processing your insurance paperwork (and even then they try to keep details vague and minimal) or telling another doctor continuing your care. This means the doctor's office can ONLY tell your employer whether or not you passed the physical, with no details. If they say one peep about your stockings or panties you can sue their butts off. Why do you think not one of your co-workers knew?

I know this because I worked in billing and patient records of a psychiatrist's office years ago. Yep, you hear some interesting things. Nope, you can't say a word to anyone.

[Kimmy55]

I dont think you have a thing to worry about.There are privacy laws that forbide the Medical Staff from revealing anything other than your medical condition.As far as the Union thing,if they wouldnt defend you properly there is always arbritration.But in my mind I wouldnt worry about anything.PS,I wear pantyhose and lace front panties every day.I could care less if somebody else saw me.

[Kristy 56]

I think with the HIPPA laws the only ones that have to worry are those unprofessiona' morons. Personally,I think they may have crossed that legal line when they shared that information amongst themselves,and laughed about it. I know you just want it to be forgotten(I would too ),but you almost want to call,and tell them you consulted an attorney,and they can expect to be called. Bet they wouldn't be laughing then. Sorry you had to go through that,but I doubt you'll hear anything more.

[Jocelyn Quivers]

Sorry you had to experience that. The rudeness you were shown kind of reminds me when I had to get a work physical in a clinic. The staff were extrememly rude if not downright mean and hurtful in talking about how horrible my health was. Maybe for extra protection you should wear thin black socks over the knee hi's just in case the unexpected happens again.

[MissVirginia-Mae]

Sweetie, why didnt you go into your work bathroom and take everything off
before you left?
I believe you have every right to use the bathroom BEFORE you get to the doctor's office.
Frankly, I think all drug tests should be the hair follicle ones.
What the nurse did was TOTALLY inapproriate and to be honest, if it was my employee, she would be gone in a second.
In this day and age, you do not laugh at someone in that setting.
If anything comes up, you have a nice lawsuit over it.

I have never had that problem in a doctor's office, but have been laughed at over some of my purchases at the Salvation Army, but then again, most of their staff are poorly trained and have no training in this.
At Sears, etc, I have always been treated with respect and have never had a problem.

Good Luck!:love:

[LisaElizabeth]

Anne,
A bit cynical aren't you? I mean.... it was the nurse/NP. PA / assistant of some sort that did the gigling and spreading of the news, not the Doctor. If you check out the larger clinics in most cities, you will find that the Doctor is now a paid employee and the staff is hired by either the local hospital or the clinic that you are in. The days of private practice are sadly limited in this future of healthcare reform.
I do believe that a letter to the Office Manager should be written, leting them know that people outside of those that were involved in the examination were told that you were wearing hose, painted nails and silk panties. THAT IS a breach of the HIPAA rules.
Only people that have a need to know are supposed to know anything about what goes on in the Doctor's office. HIPAA is very specific about that.
I do believe Amber should send a letter of complaint. It will wake up the staff and should cause some retraining in privacy rules and procedures.
I am a Doctor and my staff KNOWS that whatever happens in an exam room STAYS in the exam room or we have a very serious 'heart to heart' talk about patient privacy! Huggs,
Lisa ELizabeth

[MJ]

there is nothing wrong with crossdressing. i feel you handeled things all wrong out of fear :straightface:

[TxKimberly]

To say I'm shocked at how unprofessional they were would be an understatement.

[Rachel Morley]

Wow! I can hardly believe it. You said: "I hear her telling another nurse what I was wearing and about my toes. An 'oh my god' and more laughter ensues." That is inexcusable. Her laughing to herself ok, but telling the others when you are there and can hear, not cool, not cool at all! :straightface:

[Paula Siemen]

So as to not repeat myself...please read my posting at "investigating corssdreesing at work"

Again....just don't do it, you put yourself and your family (if you have one) at tooooo great a finacial risk. There is being "ourselves" and then there is being stupid!!!!!

And yes... those nurses violated your privacy and if you should loose your job, they would certainly be in my lawer's "suit sights" along with whatever medical institution, and doctor administered this physical.

I'm just so totally tire of being jerked around by people...just because they can.

[DianneW]

I don't know about Ohio but here in Ill. we have to sign a privacy statement with each doctor we see. Its called HIPPA. Not sure what it stands for but I thought it was somekind of a federal law which insures patient privacy. The MD & staff cannot give out any info. to anyone without your permission otherwise they can be sued. You should check on this, just in case something comes up in the future.

[Bethany38]

To say I am shocked is an understatement. That is the most rude unprofessional thing I have ever heard of. To say if it were me I would be peeved is an understatement. On the subject of them telling your employer; by law they cannot. The HIPPA law protects this. So if anything comes up own the comp.

[mklinden2010]

Sorry, but I'd probably at least go back to the doctor and have a chat with him about what's going on with the ass-istants.

Many times they don't know, and when they find out they are not happy - for all sorts of reason, some just noted. But, give them a reason to fire an ass-istant or two, and he/she may have some leverage to get rid of one or two people he/she has been "putting up with."

The other thing I might do is to have a chat with my attorney.

If you don't have one, check the phone book and make a cold call to chat them up. They're always looking for business... Check the big city phone books if you must and make it a long distance call. But, get some idea of where and what you can stand on.

I'd also take this as a "heads up" and start making efforts to see where the Union would stand with you if and when you get pulled off the bus after an accident and your boot comes off...

Forewarned is forearmed.

[AmberDay]

I have spent all morning writing a letter to the doctors office, to my employer, and to my union. I done a lot of thinking and I should be allowed to be treated with respect. My wife points out that what I do does not affect my job perfomance. After sleeping on it, I realize that they wouldn't fire me for that. There are several gay and lesbian busdrivers at my company and nobody has a problem with them. But when it was happening, all I could think about is that I am fired. It is time I make a stand for myself and stop letting other people dictate how I live my life. Easier said than done, lol, but I am going to try.

The staff has every right to feel the way they feel. In retrospect I don't have a problem with the nurse's initial reaction. BUT she should have composed herself quickly and not told the other nurses. She should have told them after I left. I talk about dumb passengers to my coworkers, but I don't do it in front of the said passenger or other passengers because that isn't professional.

Do I want them fired, no, especially in this economy. However; I want them to treat people with respect, no matter if they agree with other person's skin color, religion, sexual orientation, and gender identity.

Now, I should have known that this would happen someday. Not saying I was asking for it, but I should have realized that wearing stockings/panties etc, was a risk. I have been assaulted, had a knife pulled out on me (he was the one that went to the hospital), and even been shot at on my route, so it was a matter of time before something was bound to happen. And you know? So what? I am not hurting anybody.

Sleeping on it really calmed me down, and opened my eyes. I will take a stand and keep on wearing what I want to wear. My wife is impressed that I am 'being a man' about it, lol. (which is great because she suports me being a crossdresser, but not my crossdressing)

Two years from now I will wear the knee his on purpose.

Maybe even thigh his.

Amber

[Stephanie Heplby]

HIPAA is the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 and is a U.S. national law. These unprofessional people were not simply unprofessional, they were violating HIPAA.

Read more and protect yourself, whether crossdressed or not:
http://www.hhs.gov/ocr/privacy/index.html

[Lorileah]

Guess the nurses missed the discretion class. As medical professionals they were way out of line and in most clinics they would be fired or at least reprimanded. How unprofessional

[carhill2mn]

It was truely bad luck to have such an unprofessional person weigh you in etc. Medical professionals have "seen it all" and usually do not react. It is highly irregular for the woman to laugh and then tell others. You might consider fileing a complaint.

[O2B Barbara]

CD - great way to handle the situation! We should all be so brave...

[TGMarla]

Your mother always told you to wear clean underwear because if you were to get into an accident, you wouldn't want the doctors to find you with dirty undies. This same thing applies to underdressing, in my humble opinion. This is why I don't underdress. You never know what situations life is going to shovel at you on any given day.

[Brenda456]

The clothing is not medically relevant and should not be included in the physical. It is very unlkely go get back to the employer through the doctors office.

[dawnmarrie1961]

Amber, The nurse's was not acting in a very professional manner as would be expected of something working in the health care field. I would also expect better of Union Officers too. I' not familiar with the case of the bus driver in LA that was fired for being a cross dress "for his own protection." Did the driver choose to dress as a woman when driving the bus? If so then there may be some ground for justification since he does represent the bus company when he is on the job and such behavior may not be deemed in the company's best interest. There are often legal clauses in employment contracts that allow for termination on the "not in the company's best interest" rule or "for an employees own physical protection and well-being". Both are equally legal but the later is often used because the former can cause the company bad publicity, which they don't want.

I wouldn't dwell to much on your annual physical debacle at this point. Things have away of blowing over and working themselves out.

[Joni Marie Cruz]

Hi Amber-

<big hug> I can understand why something like this can be so worrisome and I'm glad sleeping on it has brought you to some resolution and a determination on how to handle the situation. I wish you the best of luck.

FWIW, my wife is an RN, currently in admin, with over 30 years in the medical field. I told her the essentials of what you had written, the unprofessional conduct of the staff, the attitude of the Dr, and watched as her eyes widened in surprise and dismay. Yes, to be honest, sometimes gossip is made about patients in a clinic or even hospital setting, just human nature, but to do it to your face is rude, inexcusable and absolutely outside the bounds of professionalism.

Here is one piece of information you may find potentially helpful if you do face any problems with your employer, supervisors, or fellow employees. (Who knows, one of them may be married or related to someone who works in the clinic, someone with an acute case of, "OMG, guess what I know!" and who just can't keep their mouth shut.) HIPAA provides specifically for violations of the Dr/patient relationship regarding confidentiality. If there is even a hint that anything that took place in the clinic setting was divulged to an outside party you may report them directly to HIPAA with no need for an attorney or lawsuit or anything else. HIPAA has a website which you can access directly and will tell you what your rights are and how to file a complaint should that be necessary. I hope that it isn't and that there are no problems for you at all. By the way, my wife wishes you her best, as do I.

Hugs...Joni Mari

[Mya Summers]

First off what a rude Ignorant "Coughs Loudly" woman, she is what cause some CDer's to be afraid to go out in public dressed. Now if they do say anything to your company get a Lawyer for breach of patient confidentiality, they by law can not tell your Boss or anyone else for that mater anything that they seen unless it was illegal, the only thing that they can tell your boss is the est results and nothing more. If I was you I would call the hospital head and file a complaint against her and the other nurses as well as the DR for being so rude, and tell them that if anything gets back to your boss about what you where wearing that you will file a suit for Breach of Patient Confidentiality.. I am sorry to hear your incident, hope everything gets better,:hugs:

[kimkat]

Working in the medical field I am appalled at the way the nurse or technician treated you. As others have stated, your information is protected under HIPAA and if any of the information that was not relevant to your required work physical was to come back to your employer, you will find no difficulty in hiring a lawyer. Regardless of the outcome of the case, Im sure whomever is in charge of that clinic will ensure that the employees will not want to do something like that again.

Good luck

Kim

[AmberDay]

I' not familiar with the case of the bus driver in LA that was fired for being a cross dress "for his own protection." Did the driver choose to dress as a woman when driving the bus? If so then there may be some ground for justification since he does represent the bus company when he is on the job and such behavior may not be deemed in the company's best interest.


Yes, this was several years ago, and he was driving fully dressed. Not the best attire to wear when driving on the west side I have to admit.

Amber

[Hope]

If I were you i would file a complaint with your state AMA and whoever is responsible for licensing of nurses in your state (Ohio board of nursing or whoever it is). Their behavior was not only unprofessional, and has possibly put your employment at risk but it was demeaning to you. This is not acceptable, and those who have jobs right now - should be happy about that and behave in a manner indicating that they wish to keep them. These nurses should, at the very least be reprimanded for there grossly inappropriate behavior. I would also write a letter to the doctor, or corporate entity who owns the clinic - they don't want this sort of liability issue and they are likely to act in ways you can't.

And if word does get out of the doctor's office (it probably won't - but seeing how seriously they take professionalism in the office - who knows?) you will then want to hire an attorney.

Besides, if you later need to hire an attorney you want documentation that this DID happen.

I'm sorry for your experience, and it shouldn't have happened, but don't feel like you have to take it lying down.

[Andy66]

Lisa Elizabeth: I don't think I was being cynical. I didn't say the doctor was giggling, but Amber said he walked in with a disgusted look and didn't even say hello. a little "bedside manner" would have been nice. That's why I felt the doctor was a jerk.

You're probably right that a place that does employee physicals is a big corporation, not a private practice. Either way it sounds like the nursing staff must not have been top notch.

Amber - good for you! :)

[karynspanties]

To say I'm shocked at how unprofessional they were would be an understatement.

I agree........wow, I have never had anyone at a doctors office act like this before. VERY unprofessional.

[trannie T]

The unprofessional attitude of the physican and staff is appalling.
However there is one positive note here, notice that there have been no other posts describing how others have received poor treatment from medical staff. This indicates that the treatment you received is very uncommon.

[jazmine]

GOD!!!!....humans are awesome!!!!!!!!!!

[Bev06 GG]

It was truely bad luck to have such an unprofessional person weigh you in etc. Medical professionals have "seen it all" and usually do not react. It is highly irregular for the woman to laugh and then tell others. You might consider fileing a complaint.

I agree. I'd be furious if that kind of thing had happened to my fella. Infact I'd have been straight down the docs asking for an explanation and an apology. However, thats easy for me to say cause I'm not a CD and wasn't placed in a very compromising position at short notice.
I dont know how these people get away with it. They are in very privilidged positions and should know better than to make someone feel that small and inadequate just because they have a different lifestyle to most other people.

Take heart though, its usually these kind of people who are the ones with the problem. It usually betrays some deep seated insecurity with who they are.
Take care
Bev

[Carole Cross]

I would say filing a complaint is the way to go. You certainly deserve an apology. :hugs:

[Megan70]

Amber, todayI went to my computer to deliberately search out your post from last thursday 7/23, and want to know if anything ever came from your letters you wrote to file formal complaints. They should be professionally reprimanded in their file and ethics board come down on them. Maybe its still to early in the week ( monday 7/27) for anyone to get the letters yet but follow up with your sympathetic sisters here as to the results.


Megan