Little bit of Advice

[Sarah-RT]

Well Recently I informed you all that I came out to my mom a short while back. She is okay with it and says it does not bother her but I have not spoken to her since about the matter.

Well I went shopping the other day and picked up a nice outfit of clothing that is the only one I have, everything else is lingerie. I was wondering, Should I show it to her, not on of course but say something along the lines of do you want to see what I bought etc..

I would like to show her but I dont want the situation to go from
curiosity to something awkward.

Any advice on the matter?

[tricia_uktv]

Hi hon. The ball is in her court and it will take her a while to accept you -it took my Mum over a year. But she will if you let her take it at her pace. I would say nothing. Be patient,

Hugs,

[sissystephanie]

I agree with Tricia! Let your Mom set the pace of your coming out, at least for a while.

[Jessica Who]

You may be able to mention that you purchased a dress and gauge her reaction.

After I told my mom, that same evening I mentioned that I had pictures on me, basically like this "I'm just throwing this out there, but I have some pictures of myself as Jessica on my phone. No pressure, but if you'd like to see them, let me know" ... The next day, she asked to see the pictures and she loved them.

Of course, you know your mother better than any of us, so it's ultimately up to you, but I don't see much potential harm in mentioning that you purchased something. Either way, it's going to take a little bit for her to wrap her head around this, so yes, take it slowly :)

[Sarah-RT]

Jessica - that was my first reaction to tell her, i figure her as being a woman would be interested.

however after thinking about it im still unsure, i figured it could end badly, although i do know she is a very accepting, un predujuiced ( sp? ) person, but that it would just be, simply put: ODD

[Megan70]

In a word... NO. You may have good intentions but you may unconsciuosly be forcing you hooby onrto her without her appreciation. Tell her you bought your firstoutfit and if she would car to comment and advise on it " someday" you'd love to show it to her. End of conversation.

[Sarah-RT]

That someday part sounds very insightful there megan!
I think that is a definate road I will take anyway, then again I may just forget about it all together

[rebecca_morris_75]

That someday part sounds very insightful there megan!
I think that is a definate road I will take anyway, then again I may just forget about it all together
I'm sure the situation can be frustrating and you don't want it to be awkward, but in my situation, I never got to come out to my Mom before she passed away 2 years ago, and it's one thing that I really, really wish I could have done. As said before, take it very slowly, and don't try to force anything. I truly wish you the best of luck :)

[Sarah-RT]

I managed to tell her i crossdress so i reckon there is no real rush on anything after this.

As you said, you didnt get the chance to tell her, when i first wanted to tell my mom i was 15, now 19 and reading these forums, i knew i had to tell her before i lost the chance

[Chari]

Great that your Mom has accepted your feminine side, but go slowly in telling/showing her alot more at this time. Perhaps if you inject small "girly" comments - i.e. "saw this real cute darling dress, what color do you think I'd look best in?, would love to have us go shopping together sometime" - these may keep your Mom aware that you really do enjoy your feminine side. She can be extremely helpful with teaching you makeup, fashion, and even female actions - if she so chooses. Also wearing androgynous clothing/jewelry can show her you are very serious about continuing to explore/learn about your feminine needs. Best of luck in your "new" relationship with your Mom.

[Michelle123]

Sarah, I suppose it is different for each of us. I think you know better than nayone else how she may react.
I can tell you that I came out to my mother last October, and it was wonderful. Actually, she always knew, but it was something we just never really discussed it till last yr. She was so very accepting, and I told her that I was so happy about that. She told me that she was always accepting, but she just never told me becuase she thought I would be uneasy discussing it.
Well, I asked if I could dress in front of her for the first time, and she said yes. She made me feel so at ease from the very moment she saw me.
I never felt such happiness and contentment, even when I dressed for several past girl freinds. This was something so special. I visited with her for a week, and I stayed dressed in her home the whole time. I plan to visit with her for another week in November, and I am so anxious. I cant wait. She is even going to help me with makeup, nails, etc.
So my advise dear, is for you to decide if approaching her on seeing you dressed is going to upset her or not. Perhaps she is not ready for that big step. Or, she may really be hoping that you will dress for her. Good luck dear. I hope it works out well for you.

[Sarah-RT]

Im really thankful for all your in put so far. I find it great that some of you have such good experiences with your mothers.

She told me when I came out to her that she knew, I reckon that she didnt ask me to avoid awkward confrontations? especially when she says that it dosent bother her and that she still thinks of me the same.