Voice

[JeniferMN]

Thinking about going out soon. Without any voice training, how do I handle this? Scared about being approached in stores and of coarse ordering in resturants. What have you girls done? Thanks Jenifer

[carhill2mn]

Welcome Jenifer! I am assuming from your name that you are from Minnesota. I am also. I live in a suburb west of Mpls.
As to speaking: there are several things that you can do without "voice training". It helps if you do not have an extremely low voice. Do not try to speak in a falsetto as that will certainly give you away. Many women have low voices.

Raise the pitch of your voice a few steps; speak more softly; use words and phrases
that are more "feminine" - not so loud or authoritative; women tend to "ask nicely" for things as opposed to stating a demand; listen to how other women speak and try to emulate them; women often use more gestures when speaking but in a gentle manner;
SMILE and look at the person to whom you are speaking; act as if this is nothing unusual; try to not have your early experiences in what could be considered "hostile environments". It does become easier with practice and experience.

There are videos etc. available to help if you should decide that you need more help.

Good luck and enjoy!

[Ras]

nice to see 2 other cd's from MN (metro area)

[pamela_a]

Hi Jenifer and welcome from another SW Metro girl. There are a number of really good videos on you tube that I've found very helpful for my voice.

-Pam-

[JeniferMN]

Help so fast!? Thank you to all! I LOVE this page and all of you! Thanks so much. Jennifer

[Ras]

Jenifer, How long has your wife been active in your dressing?

[Midnight Skye]

My advice for your outing would be short and to the point, nod and smile where you can ;)

Otherwise start reading up on voice training, and practice finding your "female" voice. The usual advice for this is to start by singing along with different female artists, trying to match (you won't be able to) but eventually you'll find your voice box (slip a gear) and suddenly drop down to something soft you've never heard before.

One thing you can do to help is touch your thorax (tube on the front of your throat) touch one hand higher on your thorax and one hand lower. When a male talks they use the upper and lower thorax. Most woman use primarily the lower thorax. When you talk as a male you should be able to feel the upper and lower thorax vibrate in your fingers. As you learn a more feminine voice your upper thorax should vibrate much less (if you're speaking as females naturally do).

[JeniferMN]

Totally about 6yeras. IN only.

[Ras]

nice, how did she react to it when you told her? How long have you been dressing?

[Persephone]

Don't know how your voice sounds, Jenifer, but I've gotten through years of experience with a fairly deep voice so here are my suggestions:

SMILE - the number one factor.

Make Eye Contact - Watch other women, they almost always make eye contact with the person they are talking to. Looking away is very unusual and you don't want to be unusual!

Speak softly and try to soften your voice - the other suggestions here will help you with that one.

Relax! Don't be uptight and "guylike."

TALK - Women talk to other women all the time. They give random compliments to complete strangers - a woman came passed me the other day in the grocery store, walking from behind me to in front of me, and, without breaking stride said "Wow! I love your shoes!" That's what women do, so be prepared to talk.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Veronica Nowakowski]

I bought a course on voice training, and I can give some tips that I picked up. You want to speak with your upper chest rather than your lower chest, it's sort of like half-puffing up your chest. It was also suggested on there to not speak quiet or whisper, because then you'll sound like a man, so you can practice. Have someone listen. Also, try to drink lots of water and stay away from cigarettes, caffeine, and alcohol as much as possible as they dry the throat. I hope some of that helps.

I'd also suggest visiting a goth club personally, as they really don't care if you're a guy crossdressing and you may feel more comfortable.

[JeniferMN]

Full support. Turns her on actually. !!!!!

[JeniferMN]

Awesome, Thanks Veronica. Love Jenifer

[JeniferMN]

Where's my manners! Thanks to everyone!!!!

[Diane Elizabeth]

Welcome Jenifer, I am in Bloomington myself. I too have a voice problem. So far my trips out are only in my car. When I am out a lot of the time I am androgenist so the voice doesn't matter to me. Once I get comfortable and brave enough then I hope to join my "sisters" in going out shopping. Glad to hear you have total support from your wife. DyLen

[tricia_uktv]

Smile and just talk softly and confidently. I go out dressed every weekend and have no trouble with my voice. Although I'm not too bothered about passing.