what to do when dressed

[xgeminix]

so my bf has not dressed in full yet since he has told me he was a CD in May. He has dropped hints about what he likes, and I have seen in my stockings and skirts but not in complete attire (one since my heels are to small for him, and two because he doesnt own a wig anymore since he had purged two year ago)

Now, he wants to show me what he feels comfortable in but i told him I dont just want to see him in just skirts or pantyhose, if dressing is a big part of him, why deny it, i perfer to see him in complete dress. But theres a few problems; one, we both live in our parents houses, and two, even if he is dressed and wants to go out, where should we go or what should we do.

Now, I know that there are times were he doesnt want to go out anywhere, just wear stockings while watching tv but i want it to be intimate and special. (does that sound weird) I want him to go out and feel good in what hes wearing because I know he feels good when hes dressed, but heres the thing what should we do or where do we go.

Any suggestions? I mean we cant go to clubs or bars since were only 18. Should we have a girls day and go shopping and get our nails done? Or just go on a date to the movies or bowling, my treat :-)

I dont know. Any suggestions? I want him to know I love him and respect him no matter what hes wearing. I just want to feel good and loved. What should I tell him; "get dressed cuz were going out" and suprise him, or tell him, my plan.

I just want it to be a special day, since it would be the first time he has fully showed me this side of him, and i dont want to screw it up. Any advise is much appreciated



Love always,
Brit

[MissConstrued]

Any suggestions? I mean we cant go to clubs or bars since were only 18.

Get fake IDs. Just kidding. :D



Should we have a girls day and go shopping and get our nails done? Or just go on a date to the movies or bowling, my treat :-)

All sound good, really. Your treat sounds like the best part. :)

[Princess Chantal]

Ooops I thought I originally posted the following suggestion to this thread, however it wound up in a different thread. Hmmmm, but hey it works for the other thread too

"a good pillow fight........ "

[Midnight Skye]

Hi Brit,

I would do two things. First I would go out shopping with him not dressed enfem. Go shopping for womans clothes, looking for stuff for him. Talk with him about his tastes and help give him advice on what might look good on him. Afterall, it might be a touch hard for him to go out crossdressed if he doesn't have anything to wear ;) My wife did this when I came out and it was a real TREAT!!!

Afterward I would do some inside with him crossdressed, like rent some movies. But by the sounds of it this might not be a full option for you two.

If he his ready to go out crossdressed, shopping is a ton of fun. He may not know much about putting together outfits or fashion, but he probably would love to have someone to go out and talk about that kind of stuff. Movies is an easy comfortable one too. And going out to eat is always enjoyable. Going to see museums, art, a zoo etc. Anything fun for two people to do everyday, is fun to do crossdressed ;)

[kay_jessica]

Brit,

I agree with Katlyn, go shopping with her, encourage her to grow her hair in to an androgenous length, a length that you can help her style femme, but will also allow her to be her other self without suspicion. Encouage her to grow her nails out a little, so that you can do her nails for her. Get her comfortable with you taking an interest in her appearance. Depending on how liberal his parents are, then some of those things can be done quite openly. My son's GF (now fiance) played with his hair etc and he has no interest in CDing. It seemed perfectly normal.

Why not go away together for a long weekend. I appreciate that hotels etc may not be budgetable, but when I was on a low income (i.e. a student) I would get away with my tent to a quiet camp site and be Kay for the weekend. Just because you are camping does not mean that you are restricted in what you wear. It is only a place to kip and be private without risking being discovered by parents.

Above all enjoy yur time. You are both young and still have youthfull looks and you'll be able to do so much more.

Hugs

Kay

[DanaR]

The only other thing that I might add (that wasn't mentioned) would be to treat her like a girl friend; going shopping, to a movie or anything else that you can think of.

[Samantha Kelsey]

Hi there,

Why not book into a hotel/motel for a night? He can dress to his hearts content and maybe you both could go out for a stroll. If it's out of your local area he and you might feel a bit more at ease.

[PaulaJaneThomas]

I mean we cant go to clubs or bars since were only 18.

Emigrate ;)

The girly day sounds like a very good idea :thumbsup:

[Ralph]

So, if he's sitting around in his girl clothes watching television and you're sitting there watching him, does that mean you're both watching TV?

Thank you, I'm here all week. Wait'll you hear the one about the "CD" player...

[Crysten]

You know what? It doesn't matter. Sweetie, you are awesome!! Just let it come naturally as it will....don't try to force anything. Maybe, he's not entirely comfortable going out yet himself.

The one outstanding thing about this situation is YOU. Accepting and letting your BF express his true self is just so sweet and caring. I wish you both the best! *hugs*

If he's smart, he will NEVER let go of you.

:)

Crysten

[Shikyo]

I'm so glad you're willing to help him with this.

Anyway, as seeing you have limited freedom because of your living condition it makes it harder to do anything. Like already proposed, shopping for cloths and other girlie things for him with you should be a good way to start.

Other than that depending where you live and how your parents work, you might just go walking outside for walks with him in girlie clothes. Just go outside normally, take a bag or something with some girlie cloths. Go somewhere where you are "hidden" like a nearby forest, public toilet, just anywhere where he could change the cloths. Rather a lot places have those big toilets, just go into one you and him and get him dressed up, you could help with his makeup, if he uses if. If not you could propose that as well.

The fun thing about this is, that you can do whatever you want to do, it doesn't even have to be much. Already just sitting at home in girlie cloths feels nice, so does going shopping. Just all the daily things are going to feel so much better in girlie cloths, so there is really nothing you can't do, unless it's hard to do in the cloths you want to do it in. Like climbing might not be the best idea if you wanna be in a nice dress.

[MissConstrued]

Thank you, I'm here all week. Wait'll you hear the one about the "CD" player...


I hear the best CD players are flautists. :daydreaming:

[mklinden2010]

>>I just want it to be a special day, since it would be the first time he has fully showed me this side of him, and i dont want to screw it up. Any advise is much appreciated


The Internet is an amazing thing. You could be 18... You could be 80... I don't know.

The thing is, your question is a generic one when it comes to "What do I do with and/or for this guy I care/might care about?" And, the answer is also generic, "Be careful, be considerate, be kind - to everybody."

Parties happen all the time. Halloween comes at least once a year. Special dates can be announced in advance: "Hey, how about, "G-i-r-l-s night out"?" (And, later, "B-o-y-s night out"?)

There are all kinds of ways to approach what you suggest and most your suggestions sound as good as ours. None of these, however, does very much to get you or him out from under the generic cloud of disapproval you may start and finish under. If you and he are sneaking around under your parents' roofs trying to do this, big trouble could be heading your way.

Both of you need to float the issue, in some form, to your parents - even if you are 80 years old. No one likes to have difficult issues dropped on them that they then have to deal with all of a sudden.

Announcing "Halloween in August," or, "Girls Bowling" will give them some clues about what you might be up to and interested in...

Act different to be different.

This is how you elbow your way to what you want in life - you have to work honestly for it and the way to do it is to say it and show it.

Sneaking around puts you at a disadvantage when it comes to working something out later.

Being a bit more upfront now leaves them knowing, "Well, they did this.. Then they did that... And, they seem OK with it. So, maybe it's OK, or, more OK than I thought...."

Good luck with the challenges of life. Get all the practice you can. There will be many others.

[Ras]

Brit,

welcome, nice to see another supportive and active participating GG. All of the above are great answers. That is so sweet you want his first time fully dressed to be special..You are one of the few GG's that really get it and understand it it appears.

A shopping trip or you buying him lingerie to wear under his regular clothes, matching outfits for both of you. As far as the special time..either a hotel or a fiends place that you are alone. Keep us posted

[xgeminix]

I want to say thank you to every one that replied. It was very kind of you all. I will take all of the advice and follow through. I am planning on buying her many outfits for our 1 year anniversary in September. And I am trying to make girls day out a weekly event. Maybe it sounds odd, but having a CD as a boyfriend, is an amazing thing, I feel like he truely is bestfriend and lover in so many ways. And just knowing that he showed this side of him to me makes me feel so appreciated.

I dont know why but when we go out shopping and we both point to a cute shirt and say "I want it/I love it" It makes me smile.

:hugs: Love you all

<3 Brit

[Carly D.]

Sometimes I wear just what makes me feel good.. my favorite clothing is shoes.. I was hooked on pantyhose for the longest time and wore pantyhose and heels but now I wear heels and a bra and that is fine.. I think he will wear more just give him time and don't push him into wearing more than he is comfortable wearing right now.. cross dressing doesn't have to be an all or nothing deal like some on here make it seem.. some of us are comfort seekers.. I just want to wear what I feel good in whenever that is and whatever that is.. and yes I do or have dressed fully and even been outside in fell view of the public in controlled increments.. just ease back.. halloween is forth coming.. maybe you will see him in full attire then..

[AlannahNorth]

What about a day trip away from home? Go for a drive where it's unlikely you'll run into anyone either of you know. Vehicles are sort of semi-private or semi-public - depending on your viewpoint I guess... it may be a good environment.

[Stephanie Stephens]

Last year my wife and I were camping at a state park and I got dressed in girl shorts and top and girl sneakers. Then went black berry picking. That was fun. The older camper guy next to us came over to our site to tell me that one of my lockers was open, I think he wanted a closer look.

[emmlouise]

I am so jealous! He is very lucky to have found a lady like you. In your situation you are quite restricted, but what I would like with someone like you, is to go for a day out looking at clothes, make up etc and if you have the money, buy a complete outfit. Again, if you have the money, stay overnight at a hotel or even a B&B. Pamper each other, bath/shower, scented soap, nice shampoo, then help each other dress. You could do his nails and make up and your own. Make it a special evening and let circumstances and feelings dictate whether you stay in, go for a walk or cinema. What a way to learn about each other. It will be win-win. You will have a happy boyfriend and new, good girlfriend, and he will have a lady who he knows loves and accepts him as he is. You are a girl in a million, I wish I had been as lucky!
My best wishes to both of you and all the luck in the world

Emma

[clairemarie]

You are both so lucky to have each other. Your problem makes my imagination just runs wild with ideas, shopping, make-over, picnics, movies, etc. The list goes on. What a wonderful problem for the two of you to have. The “sky is the limit”. Life is good.

Claire Marie Hawkins.

[BettyCooper]

I would suggest renting a room in a motor-hotel, where you can enter an exit your room without having to walk through a lobby. Then you can take walks and hang out as you please. An extended girl-time is one of the nicest thing for a new CD to experience.

[Tasha McIntyre]

Where should we go or what should we do.
Should we have a girls day and go shopping and get our nails done? Or just go on a date to the movies or bowling, my treat :-)
I dont know. Any suggestions? I want him to know I love him and respect him no matter what hes wearing.


Wow Brit, I hope your SO appreciates just how special you are.
I'd recommend a girls day, with shopping and lunch somewhere.

Have a great time.

Tash :)

[sherri]

Here in Texas, 18 year olds can go in some clubs, they just can't drink alcohol. In the gay/lesbian clubs I go to, which also attract hetero types, I've noticed the younger crowd includes an interesting mix of gay and hetero that are very accepting and supportive of each other. There are probably other kinds of clubs I'm not familiar with where you would be welcome. * There are also a couple of coffee shops that attract younger crowds and alternative lifestyles -- if I were your age, I wouldn't hesitate to go there in gurl mode.

I think you'll find that your supportive participation will greatly enhance the degree to which your bf is accepted by your peers, especially by the alternative crowd. You will also find that the better he puts together a good "look" (especially with your help), the greater the acceptance will be. There are will always be a few who are stand-offish or disapprove or are otherwise unsupportive, but pay them no mind and concentrate on making friends who don't judge. Don't be surprised, however, if even the friendly people have a lot of questions, cuz you two will no doubt pique their curiosity and they truly want to understand.

*Come to think of it, there is a club next door to a lesbian bar I go to that is like a bar but they don't serve alcohol. Obviously it's a place for people your age, and it seems to be popular. They have live bands (the kind that make my ears hurt) and seem to appeal to the alternative crowd. If there's a place like that where you live, I betcha you two could hang out there.

[paulaW]

I'm 20 and when I dress, I just like to go to the mall and walk around, window-shopping. It's fun, cheap, and safe!

[xgeminix]

these are all amazing suggestions. Thank you. I will be getting my liscense soon so I can drive farther away and there will be freedom to do whatever we want. And I've decided that since its about time for me to get a mani and my eyebrows done, he'd probably say its about time for him to get it too. I know he wears panties or stocking under his clothes but Im sure hes yearning to fully dress so Its time to go shopping and buy him some things.

I mean, he does wear my clothes but I think he wants his own too. Which is definately understable. Im glad though. We can share clothes. Thats so cool ;-)

We live in NY so Im sure the villlage has something fun for us to do. Im sure dancing will make him feel free and excited. I just have to find a good club that doesnt serve alcohol.

:-) love lots
<3Brit

[Cathytg]

Actually, you two can't very well go out just now because he doesn't have all the parts such as wig and padding.

Once you two are ready to go out, there a lot of places. Start with a simple drive around town (watch your speed, though). That's pretty non-threatening and he will feel very threatened just by walking out the door. If he feels good about himself, you can make a stroll through a Wal-Mart or a Target, people in there pay very little attention to each other. Try to avoid situations where he would have to interact directly with other people for a while.

You get the idea, start very slow and safe.

[pinki]

go shopping and pretend that you are shopping for yourself. when the sales girl comes around to help you tell your friend that shopping isn't as easy for a girl and hand him some clothes and tell him to go try these on to see what I mean.

You could have a game to see how much you can get the sales girl to play along. You could also do it at the makeup counter. After you get made up and try stuff on. You could ask the sales girl "what do you think he'll look like made up?"

Shoe department - "You try to walk in these."

Not every store will be amused, but many of them will and you will have a great time.

[jenna cd]

u should come to Australia legal age is 18 so u can go to bars or clubs. Lol jk but seriously u sound like a great gf and maybe just take her shopping and c wat she likes then over time teach her how to do make up, and just general female mannerisms then when ur both confident u can go out together and hav a great time :)

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

We live in NY so Im sure the villlage has something fun for us to do. Im sure dancing will make him feel free and excited. I just have to find a good club that doesnt serve alcohol.

:-) love lots
<3Brit

Oh then wow, yeah you're in a great position to have some fun with him. I was only in NY for about a month and a half but I had no issues at all with being able to shop for women's clothes there. I tried on skirts and dresses at H&M and I bought some panties at Victoria's Secret and openly talked about which styles I like and which ones I didn't with the sales girl who was helping me out.

So I agree with the people on here who said take him on a shopping trip first to get some cool clothes for him (and for you to share apparently!) and I'm sure you can find a wig shop somewhere in the Village. Also.. Darn it now I forget the name but there's sort of a novelty shop that has a few locations all over the city, I want to say it's like a man's first name but I might be wrong, they have one in Union Square for sure... but I bring them up because I know they have affordable breast forms if you want to go that far.

Once you have all her stuff down, there's so many places you can go with your new gal pal, restaurants, coffee shops, etc. Pretty much anywhere.