Kids say the darnest things!

[JamieG]

Yesterday, my wife and 4-year old girl got back from a bridal shower. My little girl gives me a big hug and says "Daddy, look at my pretty shoes!" To which I reply, "Yes, those are very pretty." She then says, "When you next go to a wedding, we'll get you pretty shoes too!" :o At this, my wife (who knows I dress) and I both exchange a smile. We have both agreed that, for now at least, we don't want to burden our children with keeping my secret.

A few days ago, my daughter was also insisting on putting an apron around my neck saying "Daddy, you wear this dress." Now, I'm sure these things are said to lot's of fathers, and are often laughed off with "Daddies don't wear dresses, sweetheart." However, I figure she'll have plenty of opportunities to pick up transphobia from society; there's no way I'm going to contribute to it. So instead, I just smile and play along, while trying not to reveal how much I would love to wear a pretty dress and heels.

Do any of you with children ever have any similar conversations? If so, how do you handle it?

[Kim_Bitzflick]

My daughters are too old for comments like that now but when they were very young I remember making a comment to them that maybe daddy should put on a dress (I think because I was cooking dinner). One enthusiastically said YES and the other emphatically said NO.

[TxKimberly]

Yep, and I handle them the same way you did. :)

[JulieC]

Yesterday, my wife and 4-year old girl got back from a bridal shower. My little girl gives me a big hug and says "Daddy, look at my pretty shoes!" To which I reply, "Yes, those are very pretty." She then says, "When you next go to a wedding, we'll get you pretty shoes too!" :o

:lol2: Oh kids are priceless!

Interestingly enough, my kids have on occasionally referred to me as "she" or "mommy". Odd that, since outside of a brief encounter years ago, they've never seen me dressed en femme.


At this, my wife (who knows I dress) and I both exchange a smile. We have both agreed that, for now at least, we don't want to burden our children with keeping my secret.

This is precisely how my wife and I approach our children knowing. They're too young yet to understand the need of a secret. Neither of them would be phased at seeing daddy in a pretty dress and heels (one of them actually caught me like that a few years back). But, they are not of an age to understand why it is important for them not to discuss it, and I really don't want them to learn to keep secrets just yet anyways.


A few days ago, my daughter was also insisting on putting an apron around my neck saying "Daddy, you wear this dress." Now, I'm sure these things are said to lot's of fathers, and are often laughed off with "Daddies don't wear dresses, sweetheart." However, I figure she'll have plenty of opportunities to pick up transphobia from society; there's no way I'm going to contribute to it. So instead, I just smile and play along, while trying not to reveal how much I would love to wear a pretty dress and heels.

Do any of you with children ever have any similar conversations? If so, how do you handle it?

Happens a lot actually, and not just on CD related topics. We are always on the lookout for any expressed thought that edges towards discrimination, hate based analysis, or anything like that. That includes crossdressing.

Our kids know full well that men can wear dresses, heels, hose, makeup, etc. if they so choose. We've told them most men don't choose to do that, but there's nothing wrong with doing so any more than it is wrong for girls to wear pants.

We've used Klinger from M*A*S*H occasionally as a reference. Though often ridiculed for his appearance in the series, he IS a hard working hospital member, and gains the respect of many around him, dresses or no.

[Rogina B]

My daughter recently commented that my hair[wig] looks a lot like mom's...All my wife and I are concerned about is the"big mouth factor." She makes me jewelry from time to time and sems to accept that I am dad,however dressed,and that is all I can hope for.

[shesadvl]

do you think Robin Williams as Mrs doubtfire has a lot to answer for....LOL....but yep kids say the darndest thing and they are way more perceptive then you think.....my :2c::devil:

[Sally2005]

I handle the situation with mine the same. Actually, over a year ago my hair was quite long and I went swiming with my daughter. We took showers before going in the pool and she saw me with wet hair...I got a really loud "Daddy, Daddy! You look like a GIRL!!!"...all I could do is say"...Very funny! Thank you!".

[Vicky_Scot]

I was teaching a course in a primary school and my nails were longish. Two girls came up and said "Why have you got girls nails".

I just replied "They are not girls nails, they are mine".

They just smiled and went back to what they were doing.

Xx Vicky xX

[Shari]

Well played Jamie.
Isn't it funny that however small the comment where crossdressing is concerned, we always seem to amplify it and make it so much more than it is?