Why Pretend You are a Girl?

[DaphneGrey]

I have been distressed lately at the amount of crossdressers, who list there gender as Femail on social networking sites. It just seems a littlle dishonest to me. If I offend anyone I apologise in advance. Are you just pretending? Or has the psudo annonymity of the internet given you an outlet to extend the fantasy?

Before you flame know that all of my web pages facebook etc list me as male and show both facets of my gender expression.

[Joni Marie Cruz]

Hi Daphne-

I guess for me it depends on how they phrase the question. If they ask for "SEX", which to me means my plumbing, then I check the "M" box. If they ask my "GENDER" which is betweeen my ears and not my legs, then I answer by checking "F" because that's how I feel about myself. I feel more female than male, though I am a male. If there were a third box labelled "TG" or "none of the above" or "why do you ask", I would probably check that.

Hugs...Joni Mari

[Kathi Lake]

Daphne, we talked about this on this thread (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=112047) earlier. It all boils down to why you are posting as a different gender? To pick up on guys/girls? To make money? To get feedback on your appearance? Is it really wrong? That's for the person to decide themselves, not us.

Kathi

[Tamara Croft]

Uhm... your signature... Jersey Girl's don't pump gas... isn't that saying you're a girl? Bit of a contradiction if you ask me... You're name here is Daphne... that's a girls name... isn't that dishonest? It's not your real name is it... why you getting your knickers in a knot over it?

[DonnaT]

I believe that since I am trans, then I am part male and part female. So is it wrong to say I am female when there is only one choice, and my image is female?

[michelle64]

why some lie i dont know....i am a guy who crossdresser and do not really care what others think...i use too but that was 20 years ago..i know who i am so may be they are just jerks and have serious mind issues...no need to lie about it....if some would just quit lieing to there GG it would be better,,heck i have met tons of GG's over the years who are more then willing to date a CD and are ecstatic about the lifestyle...quit lieing...you will find a great GG if you just stop the lies

[Christina Horton]

I am male by birth , Male in most of my life , I am Female by choice and by nature. So am I wrong?

What you should ask is why dose it bother me. Maybe you have not excepted your self yet. Or have you I don't know. All I know that it's my choice and I will be me. So if I put female on something (and I do) It's what I want to do and if someone thinks it's lieing well I guess I lie every time I go out dressed, or even when I go out in drab to cuz I am 70% fem so whats the lie hun.:idontknow::rasp: After all I always have to give a reason for being me so why should it be any different here.

Now I am not offended or mad just a little bug by the question , just a little.:doh:

[Nicole Erin]

you can be who or what you want on the web.
Why do you even care if people list a gender opposite their birth one?

And mostly - coming to a site with mostly trans folks is not the place to sit there and complain about how people present their gender.

Think what you want, I doubt this post will stand anyways cause someone will probably find this more offensive than the OP.

OMG the OP is right, I too am appalled that some list their gender as "femail".
Now if it were a genetive male listing it as "female" there wouldn't be a prob but to say they are "Femail"? I can't believe it, what nerve!

[kellycan27]

If I pretend I am a girl, I don't have to explain why I have breasts, long hair,wear dresses,nylons,heels, and make-up. Much easier that way. :heehee:

Kelly (playing nice)

[Sarah Doepner]

Why pretend I'm a girl? Sometimes I just get tired of pretending I'm a man. I don't do it to decieve anyone (probably couldn't if I tried), but to get a little balance in my life.

[Angelofsomekind]

I haven't checked in a while, but last time I did they didn't have a MtoF CD as an option.

Anytime I put female as my sex I always state that I am a CD somewhere in my profiles.

[Sheila]

Perhaps it could be that for some, listing their male name could lead to being outed as a CDER, and loss of various friends, family members and even jobs if friends go hunting for them by male name :sad:.

It could also be that their Fem self is as real as their male self, and so enables some to socialize without having to take the risk of going out the door, in fact they can socalize with family and friends and interact with them as their female self without their friends knowing they are crossdressing ............ could actually lead to an easier coming out to those folks later on if they decide to eventually tell those family and friends ............ just a thought and just my :2c:

[Wen4cd]

I avoid the social networking sites. I have one yahoo mail account listed as female, but I only use it to correspond with people who know I am a crossdresser. I think in that context, it means "you can address me as female if you like."

[Joni Marie Cruz]

If I pretend I am a girl...

But, but, you mean...I mean...what are you saying? Do you mean...? OMG! <rotflmao>

Hug you, girl.

-Joni Mari

[Lorileah]

because I can? worked for two years on a poker site, I'd say it was a dang fine bluff

[Tamara Croft]

Don't you just love people who post threads like these then instantly log off... :tantrum:

:hd:

[PaulaJaneThomas]

What makes you think I'm not a girl. Is there something odd about my avatar?

[Holly]

Daphne, your supposition suggests that people, by declaring their gender as female are pretending, when in fact, the pretending may have been all those years declaring they were male when their heart and their head was telling them something different. If you're content to list your gender as male, Daphne, I think that's great. But the fact is, who is in a better position to declare their gender than the person who's life is living it? For myself, I'm just tickled pink (no pun intended) that I have finally found a peace in my life that had been missing for oh, so long. Tell you what... I won't get distressed at your identifying yourself as a male if you will return the courtesy and allow me and the others here and elsewhere the freedom to be who they are as well and not let yourself get all distressed over it. Deal?

[Rebecca Lynn 33]

I personally don't use those sites. If I was to ever do a page for Rebeecca I would try to leave it blank I don't know if you can. I can not let Rebecca be known to my family or most if not all friends. So I can understand why some people would do female. Itry to be as female as possible when I dress and try to stuff my male self into Rebecca's closet.

This is just my opinion,
Rebecca

[kellycan27]

But, but, you mean...I mean...what are you saying? Do you mean...? OMG! <rotflmao>

Hug you, girl.

-Joni Mari

Gosh Joni,my boyfriend had that exact same reaction. The proof is in my genes.....er jeans. :heehee:
Kelly

[DaphneGrey]

Uhm... your signature... Jersey Girl's don't pump gas... isn't that saying you're a girl? Bit of a contradiction if you ask me... You're name here is Daphne... that's a girls name... isn't that dishonest? It's not your real name is it... why you getting your knickers in a knot over it?

Thanks for pointing that out Tamara, I sort of assumed everyone on here got that I was a guy, so I didn't feel the need to clarify that in my post. If I were trying to be dishonest I would have had to list as Daphne GG. I am talking about other websites like face book and my space.

If it will make you feel better I will change my profile to something more androgynous.

I asked this question seriously because I am genuinely curious. I wont lie I do find it distressing to an extent so I am hoping some thoughtful post's will help me understand and grow a little bit.

Forgive me for thinking a public forum was the place to do that.

Sorry you find that so offensive.

Not that is anyones business, but my wife had surgery this morning Just after I posted I had to log off as she was in recovery. So let me beg your forgiveness again for thinking my wife was slightly more important than my immediate attention to this thread.

Moving on Perhaps I should explain my position a little better. I am not saying this because I think I am right it is just how I feel. Please do not be offended.
I present most of the time as rather androgynous and I swing to the very feminine edge of the pendulum. My facebook account lists me as Daphne as was pointed out a female name. I do list my sex as male and under my info I list that I am Bi gender along with my given name. On the internet and in real life I give the people I interact with the freedom to use what ever pronouns they want and to to call by my Male or female name whichever makes them more comfortable.
I am one hundred percent comfortable in my skin either one of them actually. For this I feel very blessed I have presenting the way I do and being honest with everyone I meet online or in person has opened up a world of acceptance I wouldn't have thought possible. I guess that is the core of who I am and how I deal with my unique condition.

I appreciate the honest and thoughtful answers, I really do. Very often I am asked why do so many Crossdressers do this and do that? Frankly this is one of those questions. And quite frankly to an outsider or cis person who notices these things, it can be quite off putting. It comes across as dishonest (so I am told by my non gender variant friends and contacts who have noticed)

Look you love or hate me or what I have to say I don't really care. I do not come here for validation thats why I no longer post pictures and such. I asked the question because I want to know. Plain and simple.

[Starling]

Kellycan make me laugh.

:heehee: Lallie

[Tamara Croft]

Thanks for pointing that out Tamara, I sort of assumed everyone on here got that I was a guy, so I didn't feel the need to clarify that in my post. If I were trying to be dishonest I would have had to list as Daphne GG. I am talking about other websites like face book and my space.So because this is a CD site and you assume people think you are male, that's ok? How is it ok here and not on facebook or myspace? And let me say it again, your name is not really Daphne is it... but that's ok because this is a CD site...

And you do what you like to your profile, doesn't matter to me if you list yourself as a cooker... As far as I know, there isn't an option on facebook or myspace to choose CD... and as most CD's present as female, they will put female on their accounts... I still don't understand why you have such an issue with it.

[suchacutie]

Of course, that means there is no incorrect way either. Once we stepped over the line and found that we had a feminine side to ourselves, and especially once we embrace the physical changes, the emotional changes, the voice changes, and the different mental approach to present ourselves in a feminine way, even with a plumbing change (transsexual), there is an ambiguity that we all face. For me, Tina has a specific e-mail address. It's not his in any way. When the transition occurs and Tina appears, the only thing left that male is the plumbing and the chromosomes. The rest, the part that can be changes, is changed to feminine.

When do you think we should cross the line to put F in that box? When we dress and use the Ladies room? When we're on hormones? When we've had SRS and other feminization surgury? Even then one could argue about chromosomes if one wanted to! There is never a good answer! One must go with one's convictions and emotional attachment to whichever gender is in the mind.

As has been said many times here, gender expression is a choice. You are asking an unanswerable question. I'm sure most of us here make it clear that we are transgendered. At that point, the box labeled "sex" means very little!

:2c:

tina

[Sherry-Stephanie]

Irrelavant by either posting male or female..especially if your putting a picture up of yourself as a female...call yourself whatever you want to call your self...bottom line is you are who you are...for someof us that means we're both male (by what's between your legs) and what is in your emotional make up or DNA and that's female....if you want to call yourself a dog feel free to do that as well...it's whatever you feel comfortable and approrpriate with....simple huh????

Hugs...

Stephanie

[AmiFL]

I would never call myself female. I have a hard time saying that as I am very comfortable with my sexuality. I joke with my lesbian friends that I am the proverbial "lesbian trapped in a man's body". But it is a male body. I just alwayed loved the way womens clothes feel on my body. I like how they look on me and when I did dress I tried to look as good as I could..... not look like a man in a dress (although I did at times)

Even my name has a special meaning to me, not just a girl's name...... but that's just a harmless secret I hold.

Thanks you all for giving me a place to vent how I feel.......

[DaphneGrey]

So because this is a CD site and you assume people think you are male, that's ok? How is it ok here and not on facebook or myspace? And let me say it again, your name is not really Daphne is it... but that's ok because this is a CD site...

And you do what you like to your profile, doesn't matter to me if you list yourself as a cooker... As far as I know, there isn't an option on facebook or myspace to choose CD... and as most CD's present as female, they will put female on their accounts... I still don't understand why you have such an issue with it.

I find it a bit distressing for the reasons I listed in my revised post. It has been pointed out to me by friends who are not in anyway connected to crossdressing as dishonest ggs in particular. So I thought I would post a thread about it.

So I ask an honest question and you call me a Cooker, and ridicule me in three posts! Thanks Tam really appreciate it.

I might ask you why you find my question so offensive? why is it you are so quick to jump down my throat.

[Daphne Renee]

I have a facebook and a myspace page. I dont list myself as female in either one. Now I have chosen to be "female" in online games and that but that is something different entirely. I dont know the answer to your question for a fact but maybe they are just representing how they feel. I personally dont see the harm done. It is the internet afterall and you can be whoever you want. I admit there are probably some people who may be trying to scam or cause harm to others. I believe the majoirty of people who do this are just being who they want to be on the net. Its just not that easy in the real world.

[Tamara Croft]

So I ask an honest question and you call me a Cooker, and ridicule me in three posts! Thanks Tam really appreciate it. I did NOT call you a cooker, I said I didn't care if you said you were a cooker, stop putting words in my mouth.

I might ask you why you find my question so offensive? why is it you are so quick to jump down my throat.I never said I found it offensive, show me where I said that? And why are you only quoting me, when others have said the same thing?

[Fab Karen]

OK Daphne, then stop "lying" to us here and tell us your real name. Some of the biggest talkers here won't even state that they live on planet Earth.

[Christina Horton]

If I were trying to be dishonest I would have had to list as Daphne GG. I am talking about other websites like face book and my space.

Ok first this is a TG CD TS TV site, as witch if you put GG behind your name we would think your a GG not a CD. In the (my space and Facebook) sites we are just being us. Here we all know we are TG and to lie as you say here it to miss inform the girls here. We come here to get help and there for the GGs need to be able to let people know that they are GG so the will get the advice they need.



If it will make you feel better I will change my profile to something more androgynous.

Whats with the attitude hun are you Offended.




I asked this question seriously because I am genuinely curious. I wont lie I do find it distressing to an extent so I am hoping some thoughtful post's will help me understand and grow a little bit.

Sorry hun I feel your just saying that cuz of the way the girls have responded to you post.




Forgive me for thinking a public forum was the place to do that.

Sorry you find that so offensive.


So why are you getting so uptight with there response's after all It is a public forum, I am so sorry if that offends YOU.





Not that is anyones business, but my wife had surgery this morning Just after I posted I had to log off as she was in recovery. So let me beg your forgiveness again for thinking my wife was slightly more important than my immediate attention to this thread.

Again your being rude here and snapping at us, I am sorry your wife was in surgery and I hope she will be fine just tone down the attitude and you will not get the soooooo Honest replies. We could sugar coat it for you if ya like.
Now That's sarcastic hun.




Moving on Perhaps I should explain my position a little better. I am not saying this because I think I am right it is just how I feel. Please do not be offended.
I present most of the time as rather androgynous and I swing to the very feminine edge of the pendulum.

androgynous Well good for you . I hope your happy with that. Me I much would rather go either out as Mike Or Christina. Doing the androgynous thing would not work for me . I have a very big fem-self and I want to dress fully. If you don't then please understand that some of the girls her want to be addressed as a women so when we put our fem-name on the puter we want to be treated as a women that's all.




My face book account lists me as Daphne as was pointed out a female name. I do list my sex as male and under my info I list that I am Bi gender along with my given name. On the Internet and in real life I give the people I interact with the freedom to use what ever pronouns they want and to to call by my Male or female name whichever makes them more comfortable.


Well as I said before we want to be treated like women and that also means on the puter too.



I am one hundred percent comfortable in my skin either one of them actually.

You don't think we don't feel comfortable in our skin and that's why we ("LIE"). I am 100% comfee in my skin and I love everything about my CDing and my life with all that.





For this I feel very blessed I have presenting the way I do and being honest with everyone I meet online or in person has opened up a world of acceptance I wouldn't have thought possible. I guess that is the core of who I am and how I deal with my unique condition.

I am happy that you like being so up front with the people you meet online , Me well everyone I love know and my work all know and only one last person who I wish would be able to be able to be in the same room as Christina is my dad , one day I hope.:daydreaming:




I appreciate the honest and thoughtful answers, I really do. Very often I am asked why do so many Crossdressers do this and do that? Frankly this is one of those questions. And quite frankly to an outsider or cis person who notices these things, it can be quite off putting. It comes across as dishonest (so I am told by my non gender variant friends and contacts who have noticed)


I still think you not 100% sincere in that regards but as I read more of you threads I might find that you in fact are we shall see.





Look you love or hate me or what I have to say I don't really care. I do not come here for validation thats why I no longer post pictures and such. I asked the question because I want to know. Plain and simple.


I hope I addressed some of them for you. Of course that only MY OPEION but you don't care if I like you so why care if I disagree with you. We all need to ask question so keep them coming and if you tone down the attitude you might find we are more then willing to help you out. The dumbest question is the one not ASKED.

I will reserve judgment on you after I get to know you , LOL I am sure you will be sitting on pins and needles :heehee: waiting to find out.

[Heatherx75]

I'm not being dishonest when I say that I am female. That's how my brain was wired from the beginning. I was being dishonest all those years I was pretending to be one of the guys. Ask yourself this: What does my plumbing have to do with 99.99% of the interactions I might have with people? I present as female because I want to be treated as such. No one is going to have sex with me without getting to know me extremely well beforehand. That's the only time my plumbing should matter.

And I really don't give a hoot about the fact that a couple of GG's that you know find it dishonest. Tough. I know more than a couple girls with penises who are probably a LOT prettier than they are anyway, so tell them to stew on that.

And I know you directed this at crossdressers, and I take hormones so you may not have been addressing me, but I know crossdressers who identify fully as female, and they do what you are talking about.

[DaphneGrey]

I did NOT call you a cooker, I said I didn't care if you said you were a cooker, stop putting words in my mouth.
I never said I found it offensive, show me where I said that? And why are you only quoting me, when others have said the same thing?

So you are correct I am sorry I didn't mean to offend you or anyone else.

Please accept my apology.

But why are you so upset? I answered your question why not do me the same courtesy. most people said I do or I don't because and stated a reason. some were upset That I regret But I understand and tried to rephrase and still get my point across.

So what do you find so offensive about my questions?

[Angie F]

There isn't really mucch more I can add to this that hasn't been said, but I do want to expres my opionin here. I use facebook, myspace, and yearbook and list myself as female on all of them, mainly because they don't give the option of TG. I don't feel that I am lieing to anyone. I live my life as a house wife to my S.O.
I think, there for I am.
A rose by any other name is still a rose!!!!!!
I am woman, hear me roar!

[DaphneGrey]

Ok first this is a TG CD TS TV site, as witch if you put GG behind your name we would think your a GG not a CD. In the (my space and Facebook) sites we are just being us. Here we all know we are TG and to lie as you say here it to miss inform the girls here. We come here to get help and there for the GGs need to be able to let people know that they are GG so the will get the advice they need.



Whats with the attitude hun are you Offended.



Sorry hun I feel your just saying that cuz of the way the girls have responded to you post.





So why are you getting so uptight with there response's after all It is a public forum, I am so sorry if that offends YOU.




Again your being rude here and snapping at us, I am sorry your wife was in surgery and I hope she will be fine just tone down the attitude and you will not get the soooooo Honest replies. We could sugar coat it for you if ya like.
Now That's sarcastic hun.



androgynous Well good for you . I hope your happy with that. Me I much would rather go either out as Mike Or Christina. Doing the androgynous thing would not work for me . I have a very big fem-self and I want to dress fully. If you don't then please understand that some of the girls her want to be addressed as a women so when we put our fem-name on the puter we want to be treated as a women that's all.




Well as I said before we want to be treated like women and that also means on the puter too.


You don't think we don't feel comfortable in our skin and that's why we ("LIE"). I am 100% comfee in my skin and I love everything about my CDing and my life with all that.




I am happy that you like being so up front with the people you meet online , Me well everyone I love know and my work all know and only one last person who I wish would be able to be able to be in the same room as Christina is my dad , one day I hope.:daydreaming:




I still think you not 100% sincere in that regards but as I read more of you threads I might find that you in fact are we shall see.





I hope I addressed some of them for you. Of course that only MY OPEION but you don't care if I like you so why care if I disagree with you. We all need to ask question so keep them coming and if you tone down the attitude you might find we are more then willing to help you out. The dumbest question is the one not ASKED.

I will reserve judgment on you after I get to know you , LOL I am sure you will be sitting on pins and needles :heehee: waiting to find out.


Well I want to thank you for taking the time to respond and If I came off as having an attitude I am sorry.

As for my wife I was responding to a post about me posting and leaving, thus stirring things up.

You have answered some questions thanks.

Like I said I don't come here for validation and would never change my viewpoint because of the way The Girls responded, It is just not important to me. I was quite active on this forum for some months and anyone who knows me will tell you I only write what I believe and rarely change my mind.

You don't have to reserve judgement like I said I really don't care.

I hope sincerely you find peace with your dad, and anyone else you wish to be christina with. Sarcasm aside I as well as anyone here knows that pain. I would never take that lightly and thank you for sharing it with me and everyone else.

Like you everyone in my life knows and I wouldn't have it any other way.

[Nicole Erin]

What I cannot figure out is why Christina is pretending to be Canadian

[Fab Karen]

btw on My Space you have to either state male or female, there's no TG option. My profile does state I'm a crossdresser as well, I'm not trying to fool anyone ( and it's often clear to me that some guys who contact me have NOT read my profile )

( the "no they can't" below refers to her post with her legal name & living and work info being removed )

[Tamara Croft]

So what do you find so offensive about my questions?What part of 'I didn't say the word offensive' did you not get? If I had said I found what you said offensive, it would be in my posts, but seeing as I didn't say it, how can I even answer that question? Now I find you asking me a 3rd time the same question offensive.. because seeing as I can't answer it, stop bloody asking it me :Angry3:

[kellycan27]

I would never call myself female. I have a hard time saying that as I am very comfortable with my sexuality. I joke with my lesbian friends that I am the proverbial "lesbian trapped in a man's body". But it is a male body. I just alwayed loved the way womens clothes feel on my body. I like how they look on me and when I did dress I tried to look as good as I could..... not look like a man in a dress (although I did at times)

Even my name has a special meaning to me, not just a girl's name...... but that's just a harmless secret I hold.

Thanks you all for giving me a place to vent how I feel.......

Cross dressing 101....... sexuality and gender are two completely different things. :hugs:

[AllieSF]

Hi Daphne,

I don't use Facebook, nor MySpace, for my own reasons. However, I do not have a problem if people decide to list themselves as they wish. However, if they are using those sites to meet real and honest people as friends and/or to hopefully develop a long term relationship from friendship to something more romantic and committed, I think it would be more appropraie to also state somewhere in the profile that the poster is a CD/TG/TS, a gender bender, or whatever. If it is a dating site, than I think that it is wrong to say you are one gender when physically you are the other gender without some type of up-front honest explanation.

In answer to one of your other questions, some people like to jump down other peoples throat when they don't like your question or your answers to other poster's questions, instead of giving them the benefit of the doubt and see where the thread goes. I guess that it may make them feel better, more powerful or something than the other person, I don't really know and get confused by their replies too. It is a forum and it is hard for one to expect it to be without some faults.

[Tamara Croft]

The only one that has got offended is you... you keep saying people are offended, where? And Allie, I hope that remark is not at me...

[Cheshire Gummi]

Most of the discussion going on here... I'm going to go ahead and cast a level five "Didn't Read It" spell on it and just shoot my mouth off even if someone's already made my point. I've got a sixth grade education and you can't stop me!

I don't think it's dishonest to label myself as "female" on a stupid networking website. It's not government documentation. Anyone that knows me knows I want to be regarded a girl. Anyone that wants to know me better square with that or buzz off.

And what could happen? It's not like I'm going around hitting on guys, trying to make them fawn over me. Is someone going to fall in love with me just because I claim to be female? Anyone who does something like that has bigger problems than my twisted gender identity.

To put it simply, if you're hunting for boys and you convince them you're a girl without telling them you've got a little secret in your panties, I agree that's pretty dishonest.

Beyond that, I see no difference between expressing your desired gender identity and listing off your favorite movies or bands. It's part of you, why not show the world? Besides, "Trans" isn't a choice on any of these sites that I've seen.


Now the bigger question; What's with all these "AREN'T YOU JUST LYING TO YOURSELF" posts and threads lately? Have we suddenly stopped being cross-dressers? We're all just playing dress-up, aren't we? Why does that have to turn into a mass debate on social ethics?

[Christina Horton]

What I cannot figure out is why Christina is pretending to be Canadian

Now now now don't make me have to come down to Indina and Bitch slap you hun . Cuz I will. I AM CANADIN HUN and proud of it.:D :canada: :canada: :canada: :canada: :canada: :canada: :canada::canada: :canada:

[shesadvl]

:eek: shaken me head here n sitting on me fingers, I have been reading in the forum over the last two days, I have even heard my partner comment on some of the threads have gotten way out of whack, along with a couple of others that frequent the forum, so they go where you can have fun, not to get down into such dialogue which I have seen here. (ok debate is good) quit arguing among yerselves n playing TIT FOR TAT.....:battingeyelashes:

why cant those of you that post on myspace, facebook what ever the sight, flickr, that you are say "Suzi wong" TG person, would that not be upfront at least ya not lying. There in you are giving those that see your profile the honest YOU.

after all I am a GG/FAB what ever you like to call me,I dont have that fact on my profile at all.... as I see it those that CD are trying to emulate a woman that they see either out in the street., that looks good or even be yourselves and to see if you pass.

Hells bells we as women put up with a lot of chit, but you "guyz" want to emulate us..... wish you could all the way to periods, childbirth, menopause, picking up pieces of men/otherwomen friends and kids that fall apart. ( laffing playing on words or a saying everything to do with a woman is "MEN" MEN-stration.... MEN-opause.....MEN-tality.....MEN..tal abuse.....so on and so forth.

I am NOT knocking MEN

But we as women who have CD'ers as partners....accept you for who you are, the lucky ones whose male partners that dress have the honesty to be upfront about their feminine side......& the fact that you all dress so long as YOU are Honest, which I know a great deal of you have not been with your partners,... nothing to do with names.

One of the very reasons this site exists. For an insumount of reasons.
Support, Information, Help, there are those that tirelessly work on this Board and in the transgendered community, to make Life or even Society take note that YOU lot actually exist.

I did mention in a thread that there are a few that have femme names when you really think about it, some I think that they are linked most often in my book to the male side of those of "you" ,...the more mtf/ftm/ts that have more femine names are on a path they have chosen because they want to become females. For what ever their reason or choice in life is.

Those of you that CD enjoy the tactile side of being a woman should enjoy it and quit making life hard for ya selves..... sheesh.....:battingeyelashes:

We all know if you wear a female name You are still a male under all that after all.....:tongueout no Disrespect intended to anyone....;)

perhaps oi shudve kept sitting on yer fingers shesa....and for those that dont know me yeh im devilish in nature... me utmost and always... you can call me shesa or just IRENE yup thats me..... :devil:

so whats in a "name"

[DianneRoberts]

Do some Americans say they are Italian, and never been to Italy.
French and never been to France.

Or American, other than Native American, what is that saying.

I, Dianne am female in more ways then I am male.

There is a guy that "borrows" my body to participate in his hobby.
I guess we'll just have to share.

But I'm getting a bigger and bigger piece of the pie as time goes on.

I feel GREAT !

Yeah !

[shesadvl]

Off the bottom of Christina W's post page is this quotation....


Men are just a single celled orgasm , In a petri dish held by a woman. (Gene Simmons)

oi cracked up when oi read this...
I posted something in another thread which had something to do with "beam me up scotty" so I put in a clip from youtube of Dr. Spock, scotty and doc trying to beam up captain kirk, they were having trouble...
the comment was "this is a crazy way to travel spreading mans molecus all over the place... or something to that effect......

touche" :tongueout n no bitch slapping christina its not allowe...laffing....

heres the link: HxKJyeCRVek

[Sheila]

We all know if you wear a female name You are still a male under all that after all

soz hun am gonna disagree with that statement ............. some of the girls are presenting as males to the world when in fact they are in fact women ......... and some of them may be very hurt and offended by that remark, which I know will not be your intention to do ............ they have it extremely tough following the road to get to where they need to be, some unfortunately never ever make it there :sad:

[Kolokea GG]

sheadevil you rock girl:clap:

my :2c:

On the actually question..there could be many varied answers as to why some us strictly female on thier space.They may actually have 2 of them one for their male side and one for thier female side. There female side may be for strictly their friends that know they crossdress. I know that's the case with my CDer. I will say that my does represent as a male on the site, but again that's is ones own choice.

I believe that this thread got strayed because some of you took it way to personally. So Daphne feels different about than you do..there's nothing wrong with that. She wasn't telling you its wrong for you to do it, but that she wonders the reason behind it. I also seem to remember she questioned crossdresser..which if I am correct..are those who like to dress in women's clothing. They are not TG. So forgive me if I see where she is coming from.

Do I see an issue with it...absolutely not. Do I see her point..yes.

I myself wouldn't be more concerned if my cder wasdoing something deceitful behind my back..such as cheating.

[Fab Karen]

"why do you lie" is loaded language & implies wrongdoing.

[Ralph]

Perhaps it could be that for some, listing their male name could lead to being outed as a CDER, and loss of various friends, family members and even jobs if friends go hunting for them by male name.

That has nothing to do with what sex you indicate in your profile, though. If you don't want to be outed online, don't use your real name or any identifiable pictures of yourself in connection with any reference to crossdressing. Only a complete numbskull would do that and have any expectation of privacy.

I do agree, though, that this thread is a verbatim rerun of the "is it dishonest" thread from last month.

[ashcrimson]

Most of the time I dont get to say that I am a woman or a guy, people almost always assume I am a woman. And when Im forced to I say I am a woman on the options if theres no 'not specified' one.

Coz, unless I am gonna be romantically involved with anyone, I see no reason why sex in any sense would even be a factor. I mean does me being a woman or a guy have any impact while I explain why an apple is red for example or talk about ... anything. In the distant past, the rare instances when feelings got involved, I did tell what I am. I think the only instance when I didnt was when the person seemed suicidal. And jsut like what someone said defending me before, 'people wanted to believe I was a woman' so is it really my fault if I never claimed or disclaimed I was

Besides, if id ask myself what am I, I have the body of a guy I know and the tastes of a guy but I dont feel like... it feels wrong for me to say I am a guy. I think we are in the era anyway where sex is a bit more complex and just male or female or gay wouldnt suffice... I dont know, I could be very wrong, I think that line was... mindlessly said. But thats what I think, thinking about it for a few minutes.

[shesadvl]

soz hun am gonna disagree with that statement ............. some of the girls are presenting as males to the world when in fact they are in fact women ......... and some of them may be very hurt and offended by that remark, which I know will not be your intention to do ............ they have it extremely tough following the road to get to where they need to be, some unfortunately never ever make it there :sad:


oi did say sheila no offence intended in anyway.... this is all about using fem names....which either way they present.....they lead both sides of the spectrum sheila....as I see it...... in real as men born as..... even tho they dress to emulate women,.... that those that dont have the support say debs has with you present her to the outside world, they "DRESS" in womens clothes... and as I said in the latter part of that there are those that have chosen the path to become women....

once again I am not knocking "men" or the fact they want to "dress" or to use "womens" names, I thought this was about "honesty and using a femme name" on other forums.....:battingeyelashes:

[Sheila]

That has nothing to do with what sex you indicate in your profile, though. If you don't want to be outed online, don't use your real name or any identifiable pictures of yourself in connection with any reference to crossdressing. Only a complete numbskull would do that and have any expectation of privacy.

perhaps I am silly but by ticking the M box and having a Fem name would/could lead to awkward questions, ............. this could go on forever,..... my take is and always has been, when a TG presents as fem .. or Male then I will use their proper pronouns as much as my aged memory allows me to remember ...... A courtesy I feel I can afford them but just my :2c:

They do not all go on those sites to cheat ......... am not saying some don't, but at the end of the day cheaters will cheat whether online or not :sad:

[Kolokea GG]

They do not all go on those sites to cheat ......... am not saying some don't, but at the end of the day cheaters will cheat whether online or not :sad:

I didn't say they all do..I said I would be more concerned about that than whether thier page said male or female.

[shesadvl]

as I put in my posting... when coming back in here I went into the wrong thread in the MTF so I read a little.....

The CDing members have a thread going in the MTF forum its a Sticky: Your female name *merged threads*
the quick one or two I read were interesting exactly how I see things in some of the CD'ers cases that their names are close to their own real name... and others have posted for other reasons... its an interesting....read.... proves why they use femme names.....

we all learn something....:battingeyelashes:

[Angie G]

In fantasy land we can be who ever we wish to be. I wish to be a girl. So a girl I am.In real life I'd rather be a girl so I am whenever I can. I think in my mind I'm really more girl then boy anyway.:hugs:
Angie

[shesadvl]

In fantasy land we can be who ever we wish to be. I wish to be a girl. So a girl I am.In real life I'd rather be a girl so I am whenever I can. I think in my mind I'm really more girl then boy anyway.:hugs:
Angie


:rofl: you go gurl....:devil:

[kellycan27]

That has nothing to do with what sex you indicate in your profile, though. If you don't want to be outed online, don't use your real name or any identifiable pictures of yourself in connection with any reference to crossdressing. Only a complete numbskull would do that and have any expectation of privacy.

I do agree, though, that this thread is a verbatim rerun of the "is it dishonest" thread from last month.

Yeah Ralph, The "hot or not" thread.

[TGMarla]

Well, I'm a girl here, and I listed my gender as "female" on my MySpace site. When you visit me there, I'm a girl, plain and simple. I don't give a hoot whether I'm genetically male, or if I'm hanging the male package underneath. I'm still female when I'm there, same as here. I'm not there trolling for sex, and if you visit me there, and you are trolling for sex, then you can go elsewhere. But there, as I am here, I'm a girl. Deal with it.

[Patricia1]

Who's pretending? There's no pretense to the way I feel about myself, so why fight it?

[dilane]

I have been distressed lately at the amount of crossdressers, who list there gender as Femail on social networking sites. It just seems a littlle dishonest to me. If I offend anyone I apologise in advance. Are you just pretending? Or has the psudo annonymity of the internet given you an outlet to extend the fantasy?

Before you flame know that all of my web pages facebook etc list me as male and show both facets of my gender expression.

Hi Daphne,

My answers:

"dishonest" to present as female? Not inherently, depends on whether you are hurting or using others.

"Are you just pretending?" No, just expressing my gender.

"extending the fantasy" No, this is reality.

Ok, I have some questions for you:

1. Is it inherently immoral to present as female in public, or cyberspace?
2. Have you ever done so, if so, how did you feel? Like you were dishonest?
3. If it is not inherently wrong to present as female, where do you draw the line?


I don't want to be presumptuous, but do you think there's a bit jealousy of those of us who are out and about?

[Christina Horton]

I don't want to be presumptuous, but do you think there's a bit jealousy of those of us who are out and about?

that could be the prob but I don't think so. She just needs to know our reasons I think!

[DaphneGrey]

Hi Daphne,

My answers:

"dishonest" to present as female? Not inherently, depends on whether you are hurting or using others.

"Are you just pretending?" No, just expressing my gender.

"extending the fantasy" No, this is reality.

Ok, I have some questions for you:

1. Is it inherently immoral to present as female in public, or cyberspace?
2. Have you ever done so, if so, how did you feel? Like you were dishonest?
3. If it is not inherently wrong to present as female, where do you draw the line?


I don't want to be presumptuous, but do you think there's a bit jealousy of those of us who
are out and about?

Ok Diane you caught me. I am so jealous of all of you because your out lmao, why diddnt I think of that.

It always boils down to this. The OP is upset because he or she is just not as advanced as the rest of us. Poor dear .

I won't go into it because I don't want to get into a testosterone fuels pissing match over who is more girly.

Let's just say yes you were being presumptuous.

[Holly]

Daphne (male name not disclosed) since you have choosen not to answer Dilane's questions even though she specifically answered your questions, I can only surmize that you are not interested in an honest dialog. It seems the only one involved in a "testosterone fuels pissing match" is you, dear. And as far as I am concerned, you can have it all. I don't care for the stuff myself.

[DaphneGrey]

Daphne (male name not disclosed) since you have choosen not to answer Dilane's questions even though she specifically answered your questions, I can only surmize that you are not interested in an honest dialog. It seems the only one involved in a "testosterone fuels pissing match" is you, dear. And as far as I am concerned, you can have it all. I don't care for the stuff myself.

I disclosed my male name in this thread yesterday along with my occupation adress and adress of my employer. The post was deleted by the administration. Further I would have answered Dilane's questios had she not added her little supposition about being jealous.

As you did (no male name disclosed) in the opening of your post.

I realize I have upset some people here for which I have tried to make peace. So tell me again who is not interested in honest open dialog.

Just my two cents, but why are you all so upset to begin with if You are all that comfortable with yourselves, it shouldn't really matter what I said. Beyond that why would it be so important that I disclose my name. As I tried to do yesterday. The question was about biological sex.

[shesadvl]

[QUOTE=DaphneGrey;1855327]

I won't go into it because I don't want to get into a testosterone fuels pissing match over who is more girly.

[QUOTE]

ya can tell me to butt out...

but with the comment Holly made as well as Daphne, as quoted ..the above comment is a typical...male comment and trait...... so where is the gurly in all that.... n thats coming from me a GG/FAB at birth.... geeze... you lot.... get over it an... if you want to emulate women or be a woman act like one.....

but then oi can show a very male trait meself...by saying yer lot are all piss n no parfin.....LOL... dont take things so seriously.....:tongueout:devil: AS I posted whats in a name.....

[Tamara Croft]

This thread is done, I'm sick of the arguing in it.

And FYI, read the rules, you are NOT allowed to put your real names in the open forum for your own protection. What you did yesterday Daphne was really stupid, not only giving out your full name and almost where you live. This section of the board is open to anyone to read, what you did could have put yourself and your family in danger from lunatics who hate CD's... next time think before you post... and now this thread is done.