Close encounters stories

[joann07]

Have you ever been out somewhere, and when you least expect it, you happen to come in close contact with someone who doesn't you know dress? For me, it has happened a few times this year.

A few weeks ago, I was out shopping at a nearby Ross when I noticed two female acquaintances browsing around a few isles away from me. I didn't panic and just kept doing what I was doing, minding my own business, while keeping a watchful eye of their movements.

I tried to keep my distance, but there was one point when I lost track of one of them and, while I was walking down the long dresses isle, one of the girls came around the corner and almost ran into me. :eek:
As we dodged each other, we briefly glanced at one another and then kept on walking as if it was nothing. Now I'm sure that if she had recognized me, she would've stopped and had that strange look on her face, but she didn't seem surprised or suspicious. Even as I continued browsing, they didn't try to get closer to see if they could get a good look at me. After a while, the pair lined up to checkout and then they left.

Another similar thing happened a few months ago when I was shopping at Target. As I was walking down one of the main isles, again minding my own business, when a close family friend of over 20 years came out from one of side isles and nearly ran into me. We both paused and looked at each other for brief moment and then she turned back to her hubby to continue the conversation she was having with him. Me, I slightly moved aside and continued walking, never looking back, as if it was nothing. Just like the girl at Ross, I'm sure that if she had recognized me, she would've stopped and probably would've asked if she knew me, but she was completely oblivious. Although, I thought I saw her hubby checking me out since he loves Asian girls. :heehee:
Recently, I ran into that same friend while in drab, but she never said anything about it.

In all these close encounters I had this year, I was bit surprised, but I didn't feel any kind of nervousness. I never panicked nor tried to hide or evade. I just treated each situation as if it was no big deal. It's a true test of how much I've progressed in the nearly three years I've been dressing. We'll see who else may cross my path.

So, what's your close encounter of the third kind?

Hugs!

[Breanne]

.......Recently, I ran into that same friend while in drab, but she never said anything about it.

Just be careful you don't say something like "Didn't I almost run into you at Target?"

[dilane]

I've come across my father once at a mall, at a reasonable distance. There was no eye contact.

I also was walking into a restaurant just when an acquaintance came out. We gave each other a quick glance an kept on our way. I don't think he recognized me.

I've had a couple of friends who've seen both versions of me and they say there's no way I'd be recognized, but who knows.

I've also run across people I've met initially en femme in a club or bar, while shopping. And as I was en femme, they greeted me warmly :) This isn't as easy as it sounds in a city as big as L.A.

[Jessica Who]

JoAnn,

You certainly handled those situations well. The only story I have that comes close is when I was dressed and my best friend knocked on my front door, a surprise visit.

My wife had to answer and tell him that I wasn't feeling well. A few months later, I let him in on the secret and he couldn't even remember that day he dropped by :)

[Rita D]

No doubt each and every one of you is thinking to herself: "If she was made at Be-All what's the big deal?" And essentially, you'd be right. However in ALL the times I've been out and about this has NEVER EVER happened to me; so when it did at Be-All I was taken completely off guard.
While sitting at dinner on Saturday night, a woman who I did not recognize, came up to me and said, "Excuse me but you look like someone I went to High School with. Is your last name.....? And she said my REAL last name. At this I broke out in a sweat and had that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach- I still did not know who SHE was. At last she said her male name, and I found out she was someone who I'd known quite well back in the day. I was flabbergasted- this would have been the LAST person on my list if anyone had asked who in my graduating class would I expect to be TG.
Anyway- there of course was no harm done because she was/is a sister ; but that sinking feeling in the moment of being "caught" was very, very weird!

[Kathi Lake]

Gee, now that you mention it, . . . :)

I took the day off today to work on remodeling my bathroom (I know - great Labor day holiday, eh?). I was in Home Depot getting some stuff, when I hear "Hey, (insert male name here)!" I turned around to see my pastor. We talked about plans we were making for our Thanksgiving dinner (I'm chairman of deacons, so he likes to get my input) and other churchy stuff. He occasionally looked puzzled and made scratching/wiping movements near his lips. You know how you wonder sometimes if someone is trying to signal that you have something out of the ordinary - spinach in your teeth, gravy on your chin, lipgloss on your lips? :eek:

I suddenly remembered that I had applied a coat of lipgloss (Bare Escentuals Buxom Lips in Dolly, for those interested) between errands and my lips were now shiny, plump and kissably gorgeous. Talk about an "oh crap" moment! We parted ways and nothing was said. I'm going to treat this as a "Don't ask, don't tell" moment. He ain't asking and I'm not telling. :)

Kathi

[joann07]

Those are some interesting experiences everyone.
Thank you for sharing!


Just be careful you don't say something like "Didn't I almost run into you at Target?"

Oh yeah.
I most definitely didn't say anything about being at Target.


Hugs!

[sherri52]

You have it now. You pass. congrats

[Sara Ann]

I've occasionally walked passed an acquaintance and my heart always pounds a few dozen extra beats. But no one has even given me a second glance. It's a tiny bit disappointing and very exhilerating at the same time.

In one particular instance, my wife and I went to a restaurant where an acquaintance of her best friend worked. Uh oh! He was working that night! I had already met him in drab, but that night I was introduced as a single friend from overseas in which English was not my first language (I didn't have a handle on the femme voice). Instead of talking to my wife, the horndog goes out of his way to chat me up as we leave!

Another time was when we went to some pre-Halloween gender-bending event at a club. Not everyone was in 'costume,' but I was in a short, flirty black A-cut dress, 4" inch heels, and perfectly-applied make-up (I felt damn sexy that night!). We go out for a smoke and I end up talking with someone that I knew from work. He didn't recognize my voice. He was floored when I finally told him who I was.

Then later, my wife and I decide to leave and we have to inch past all the people waiting in line to get to the ballroom/dance floor. I almost freaked when I saw the boss-of-my-boss waiting in line with her date. We squeeze by boobies-to-boobies. Not a sign of recognition from her then or since.

[Rhonda Jean]

When my ex wife and I were first married we moved to a new town where we didn't know anybody. We lived in a big apartment complex. I'm sure all of our neighbors had seen me in curlers and nailpolish and androgenous clothes. We didn't worry about that stuff back then (those were the days!). One Saturday morning she had already rolled my hair when the doorbell rang. Without looking through the peephole, thinking it was one of the neighbors, I opened the door. It was one of my wife's friends from home whith her (the friend's) mother. I pretty much slammed the door in their face and told my wife who it was while I ran to the bathroom to take my hair down. Absolutely no doubt they saw me, but, other than getting on to me for slamming the door, nothing was said. She became pretty distant after that, though.

A couple of years later we were in our first house. The front door had a small window. I was once again in curlers (as I usually was on weekends) and wearing these obscenely short/tight pink satiny shorts and a little tight top. As I walked past the door, the doorbell rang and I looked over to see my best friend's wife peeking throught the window and waving. My wife let her in while I took my hair down and put on some decent clothes. Nothing was ever said.

[Diane Smith]

About a week ago, I was at Lenscrafters to pick up a couple of new pairs of glasses. I was fully dressed, which in my case means I was also displaying a lot of my piercings and tattoos which are not normally visible when in drab, not to mention heels, painted nails and all the rest. As I was taking my seat at the table, someone called out my male name, walked right up to me and started talking. It was an acquaintance from school, someone I work closely with for about a week every year, preparing a guest lecture she delivers to one of the high school classes I teach. She is also the mother of two of my students.

Unbelievably, I handled it without freaking out. She acted as if there were nothing unusual at all and I managed to do mostly the same, although I did say at one point, "I guess you've never seen me dressed this way before, huh?" and she muttered some kind of noncommital answer. But there was no sense of any surprise or discomfort in her tone. We kind of continued the conversation off and on as each of us got our glasses fitted, at separate tables a few feet apart, and she promised to bring a book I've been interested in the next time we meet.

I think the worst thing about it was that she recognized me apparently instantly and with no special trouble. I thought my "disguise" was at least a little better than that. This lady is a lawyer, journalist and professor who teaches law school students about privacy and copyright. She is also a minor local media celebrity. She has always seemed very liberal and open-minded, but I didn't expect to test it in that way! I doubt anything bad will come of it or that she'll mention it again (I will see her again at work on Tuesday and Wednesday), since she barely acted as if she noticed anything out of the ordinary the first time. You can bet I'll be watching closely to see how she looks at me, though.

I handled it pretty well at the moment, but was certainly shaking afterwards! It's an even smaller world than I thought!

(I prefer to think I was recognized not so much because I look like "him" when I'm in girl mode, but because I look like Diane when I'm in boy drag at work!)

- Diane

[sandra-leigh]

I don't tend to have "close calls" en femme: people just outright recognize me, no matter how differently I've dressed. Fortunately it isn't people who know me personally.

I do have one semi-close call along these lines, though: one of the few times I went to the local "alternative sexuality" social events, I was completely Dressed, and in walked one of the women from work. She didn't have appropriate "fetish dress", but at the time at least they went pretty easy on such things; she simply took off her top and was out on the dance floor dancing in her bra. Fortunately the place was big enough that she didn't see me sitting there quietly...


Mostly I have "close calls" of cases where I had definite plans to dress and, for whatever reason, did not dress, and then at my destination, encountered someone I knew. Precognition??



At Christmas this last year, I went "back home" for the first time in several years. I was to have supper with a good friend, who had moved to relatively close to a mall that it was relatively easy for me to get to. We arranged that I would go to the mall and call him and he would pick me up.

But before heading to that mall, I'd done research and found out which store sold real (professional) breast forms, so I headed to that mall on the city bus. While I was sitting on the bus, doing not much of anything, a woman got on and walked directly towards me, with a huge grin on her face. I had no idea who she was. And she said hello to me, and I still had no idea who she was or why she would make such a bee-line to me. Then she said a few more words and I caught the voice -- it was the wife of the couple, whom I have also known for many years; she doesn't normally take the bus but had had an appointment. And then I was stuck, because all of the good stores have abandoned the mall that had the lingere store, and I couldn't explain why I was getting off there... Oh yes, I was wearing some smaller forms, but fortunately it was wintertime and my coat hid them.

So I went to the store, did get sized properly, tried some models, but didn't happen to buy. Then (with my forms on) I bussed over to the mall I was to be picked up at, and wandered around there for a while, jacket undone. Eventually, as it got close to the time to call for the ride, I went into the washroom and took off the forms; from there, with the mall layout, it was natural to head to the Zellers (sort of like Target). At Zellers, I headed to the bra section, hoping to find a water bra (none available where I live). And as I walked slowly through the bra section, who should approach but the friend I was supposed to visit, and his daughter and granddaughter, who had popped into Zellers for some last minute Christmas shopping. Fortunately, they were surprised enough at happening to encounter me at all that they didn't notice that it was the middle of the bra section, and fortunate that I had taken off my own forms not 3 minutes earlier!


The latest "good thing I didn't dress" incident was about two weeks ago; we went to the farmer's market earlier than we normally would, and I had definite plans to wear one of my skirts there (I've worn skirts there before, it hasn't been a problem.) But I didn't want to risk "provoking" my wife (we haven't figured out yet what is okay for me and what isn't), I wore regular shorts. Well, the place was packed with people! And as I dodged around people to get to a corridor to head to our favorite veggie vendor, a woman wear semi biker-chick style clothes said hello to me... hearing her voice and taking another look, I realized it was one of my more friendly acquaintances from work (more than an acquaintance, more like an undeclared friend) -- but dressed completely differently than at work. Differently enough that I got the distinct impression that the reason we get along so well at work is that both of us have hidden sides... I don't think she would have freaked at all if I had been wearing a skirt.

Anyhow, made my way into the veggie line, was delegated to hold the place in the long line-up while my wife went and actually got the produce to purchase. I looked ahead in line, thought I recognized someone... and I was right. The mother and father of the leader of a musical group my wife used to be involved with. We see them about once or twice a year... seemingly always in that exact same vendor's line at the market :) Now, in one of those twists of fate, their daughter (the leader of the group) used to be a FTM and a lesbian... who eventually fell in love (at a professional musical training place) with a guy, stopped being a FTM for him (well, who knows what they do at home). So the mother and father probably wouldn't have blinked if I had been wearing a skirt. On the other hand, the mention of it probably would have gotten to their daughter, and as the parting between my wife and that group wasn't on the greatest of terms, I'm not so comfortable with having her know about me... don't want them (the husband + wife musical group leaders) to put a "dig" into my wife about it the next time we happen to meet. Sly comments from complete strangers are easy to just dismiss out of hand, but sly comments from ex-friends... well, my wife is still unhappy about how she was treated by the group, and it would get my wife worked up again. I don't mean that my wife would be upset at me having (somehow) "caused a scene"... but I'd (re-) hear about all the various ways they had mistreated her for weeks afterwards if they did "dig" into her about me.

[Glenda58]

Ran to a exgf in the mall once and she just walked right by me. If she knew it was me she would have cross dresser at the top of her lunges. (she didn't like me)

[kaitlin]

Hey Girl, I have never been out dressed, don't pass well enough, but I think I'd freak out if I was and ran into someone I know! But here in backwoods USA just about everybody knows or is related some way to everybody else so it's a little tougher. You are so cute and so fem that I don't think you would ever have to worry! Luv Ya Kaitlin

[renee k]

I posted this a couple of years ago here. But here it is again for those who joined since.

I went to the Fisher Theatre here in Detroit with another T girl to see a musical. Setting right behind us was my girlfriend's mother and her two sisters, who I knew from family gatherings. But they knew nothing about this side of me. Talk about being nervous as a long tail cat in a room full of rocking chairs. My girlfriend told me about her buying tickets to see Le Mes as a Christmas gift for her mother and sisters, but didn't mention the date. So there we are at intermission waiting in line for the Ladies room, carrying on a conversation about the play. They had no idea they were talking to their sister's BF. And nothing was mentioned to me afterwards from my GF.

Renee

[Kim_Bitzflick]

My "close encounters" seem mild compared to some here, but I'll post anyway.

Well I just deleted my first try at this. Let's try again.

About two years ago, when I forst started going out fully dressed, I was at the mall. As I walked though the mall I did the usual looking in the shop windows. As I rounded a corner, I almost walked straight into to a coworker! I'm pretty sure she didn't recognize me & nothing was ever said.

The other time happened last week. My wife & I were in Wal-Mart. We turned on to the main aisle and I saw an aquaintence that I met at a party a few weeks earlier. He glanced at me and just kept walking like I was any other female. Even if he did make the connection, I really wouldn't mind if he knows.

[Kathi Lake]

Wow, Kim. That was close! :)

p.s. Knowing that I was going to see my pastor again in a meeting this morning, I made sure to haul out and use my tube of cherry Chapstick a couple of times to throw him off the scent. :)

Kathi

[CharlotteW]

Wifey and I were ready to go out one evening but we were waiting for our 19 year old to arrive home to babysit. My wife told me to leave the house and walk to the end of the street and wait around the corner, she would pick me up when the teenager arrived home. We looked up and down the street and the coast was clear so I left the house. I only had to walk about 150 yards to the end of the street so I thought he would never see me.
As I rounded the corner at the end of the street I remembered that we needed the TomTom so I gave her a call to remind her to bring it. I was mortified to hear the voice of the teenager answer my call, clearly he had entered the street as I was walking away from the house. He only saw me from behind but I reckon he spotted me and knew who I was.

[Andy66]

Some people might recognize you and some might not. A guy I know came out to me a few weeks ago. He was in drab, and simply handed me his phone, showing a picture of himself in makeup. Haha! He had to explain because I thought it was a picture of his mother. (Oops, sorry!) :doh:

[Teri Jean]

Kim I just posted my experiance today under the transexual blog, but in short my father-in-law caught me off guard in the garage. Super nice.

Teri

[donnatracey]

Wow, Kim. That was close! :)

p.s. Knowing that I was going to see my pastor again in a meeting this morning, I made sure to haul out and use my tube of cherry Chapstick a couple of times to throw him off the scent. :)

Kathi

Kathi, excellent idea! I have used the cherry chapstick as an excuse in the past to explain a "redness" on my lips to a female co-worker. Nor sure if she completely bought it but nothing else was ever said......but always made sure I had the cherry chapstick w/me, just in case!

[Kathi Lake]

Kathi, excellent idea! I have used the cherry chapstick as an excuse in the past to explain a "redness" on my lips to a female co-worker. Nor sure if she completely bought it but nothing else was ever said......but always made sure I had the cherry chapstick w/me, just in case!I think it might have worked with my pastor - a guy. I don't know if it would have worked with a girl though. There is quite a difference between cherry Chapstick and a tinted sparkly lip gloss that a girl would see right through. Then again, he does have four daughters, so he might know anyway. Eh. Whatever. :)

Kathi

[Rachel M]

One nite while have some Rachel time, I decided to go to a Restaurant/Bar. As I was approaching the the place a group of men had just exited. As we got closer to each other I could feel one of them checking me out. It was a coworker of mine. He had smiled and mouth hello in a hitting on you manner. I smiled and looked away and continued to enter the restaurant. I headed straight to the ladies room to relieve and compose myself. Checked the make up, took a deep breathe and headed to the bar area.
I grabbed a seat at the bar. As I was sitting there contemplating what to order I had a look around the bar. Well, at a near bar table sat three more male coworkers with their wifes and girlfriends. Deciding that it wasnt a good idea to stay, I left and went to another place. The funny thing is I cross paths with those guys almost daily and they had no clue. I was glad I passed that nite if any.
Rachel

[Rachel Morley]

I've seem a couple of people I know from a distance when I've been out dressed, but I've only ever had one close up encounter.

I was out shoe shopping with my wife at Payless. I was fully en femme, and I was in the store walking up the isle browsing all the shoes, as I turned the corner at the end of the isle I nearly jumped out of my skin. There was a woman standing there who works in my company's purchasing department! She knows my boy self quite well.

She was looking at shoes so she didn't make eye contact with me but I suddenly felt very uncomfortable. I immediately turned and went back into the isle I came from and went over and told my wife that I needed to leave. My wife carried on shopping while I waited for her outside.

I'm not ready to out myself to a co-worker. I like to keep my male work life separate from everything else.

[Andy66]

Now I'm starting to wonder if anyone I know has ever spotted me and hidden or said nothing, not knowing that I would have been more than okay with what they were doing. :heehee:

[Faye56]

Around 3 years ago i worked in a large office complex, many of the staff had never met others on the floors above where they worked.
I had often seen this tall, stylish woman walk through our section and most of the other women in the section had this dislike for her, some using words that were very unkind.
A few months ago I decided to purchase a new skirt suit and being there is a Marks and Spencers Outlet store around 25 miles away I decided to combine a afternoon out as Faye with looking for a new suit , obvious really .

So there I was browsing the rails , cautious of being read , though I had shopped there before on a few occasions. I then became aware of someone close by and out the corner of my eye I could see a tall woman also browsing the rails. For several minutes she and I seemed to play a cat and mouse game of going to the rails that the other had left.

I slowly moved onto the next set of rails which allowed me a view of this woman , I almost gasped outwardly when the tall stylish woman shopping was the tall stylish woman from my workplace.

I could feel her eyes were on me as she came into the aisle where I stood , I realised I could either walk out the store or face her , I chose to face her. I turned and she looked at me , I looked back at her , we stood two tall suited women for what was only seconds but to me seemed minutes and she spoke " Sorry for staring at your suit , but was it from here ? " , I smiled and shook my head , " Just my luck , it looks fabulous on you " she replied , I smiled again and in my femme voice said thank you.

The following week she entered our office, wearing a grey skirt suit identical to mine. Should I feel flattered or annoyed . Well what chances are there of a woman like me ever being in the same place, at the same time ,as a woman like her ....... oh hold on !

[Nicole Brown]

Hi Faye, I would definitely be flattered.

I have had a similar experience as many of you have had except in the reverse. I have become quite friendly with a woman who owns a shop that I buy some theatrical makeup, you know, Ben Nye beard cover. Well, this lady only knows me only as Nicole and has never met my male self.

I was walking through the aisles of a local supermarket in male mode, turned a corner and actually walked right into her. As she looked up at me and I looked down at her we apologized to each other. She then said that she thought she knew me but couldn't remember from where. Feeling like a real jerk, I said that she must be mistaken and that I didn't know her.

About a week later I visited her shop to make a purchase and we wound up chatting for about 30 minutes as usual. During the conversation, she mentioned the incident in the supermarket and referred to the person who almost knocked her over as a big oaf. Imagine my pain at being called a big oaf, and at the same time my relief at not being recognized.

Nicole

[Lorna]

There's another aspect to this. I don't go out dressed but I do sometimes shop for female clothing. While I might keep an eye open for people who know me, what I can't do is predict whether I might come across any of the strangers I encounter in some other context in the days and weeks to come.

Let me give an example. I had an hour or so free before attending a meeting in a city a long way from my home - little chance of meeting friends or colleagues as I browsed through a distinctly female part of the large M&S store there. Suddenly I realised that other people waiting to attend the same meeting might also be around the shops and might later, during the meeting, recognise me and wonder why I was in the M&S lingerie section. Of course, it wouldn't matter if we were all anonymous at the meeting, but I would have a name badge and might be involved in group discussions, etc. I decided to make my exit from M&S and, as I left the shop, sure enough I met someone just entering who I knew in a professional capacity and who would be going to the meeting. We exchanged a "hello, see you later" greeting and all was well - but would it have been the same if he had seen me browsing the racks of bras?

[vivian fair]

Wonder why he was there?

[Maddie22]

I had an encounter that I came clean too and outed myself.

I had just came out to a girl-friend of mine *S* and we decided to go out together to a gay bar. Well this gay bar is extremely close to another bar that many of our friends go to, as well as the restaurant/bar that I was currently working at.

As we pull in the parking lot, I tell *S* We are sure close to work and the pub, I hope no one sees me!

Well we are in the gay bar for about an hour, and we decide to leave to go see a drag show at another gay bar. As we leave, I am walking first, and in come our good friend *K* who I make direct eye contact!

I immediately turn around to *S* and say "Oh Sh!t, it is *K*!" and sit down with my back to her.

She didn't exactly recoginize me at all, but since she *K* did see *S*, I knew I couldn't excape with out her seeing me (I am too tall to pass really)

So *S* talks to *K* and says there is something you should know about one of your best friends!

Then I turn around, and she took a few seconds to recoginze me! But she was excited and gave me a big hug!


That was my close encouter while dressed!

I have been out shopping for myself in male mode (I always do since I am too tall to go anywhere else, or at least that I feel comfortable with right now) and I have seen an old bar regular of mine who also works with my mother (although I think she would be extremely accepting, and probably want to hang out, I don't think she could keep it from my mother) out shopping, and managed to avoid her.

I don't have a girl friend, so if I do get caught shopping, I'm not sure what I would say!