For the part-time girls..have you ever...

[Marissa]

Began your day thinking of how fun it will be to dress for the evening..whether going out or just staying home and enjoying the feel of being a girl????? :daydreaming:

And then like a puff of smoke, the feeling is gone????:eek:

okay, so this question may have been asked before..seems like that is said alot nowadays :D

This morning, i began my routine of coffee, emails, a bite to eat..thinking of what all needed to be done so i can begin to dress.. as i had my weekend planned out:

friday: dress but stay home..
saturday: dress and go out
sunday: maybe dress, but stay home
monday: relax, get things in order for work the next day

so my day continued, even included a few texts back and forth with the ex.. she was having a bad day and i was having a lonely one..not sure which is worse :doh::heehee::sad::o

then it was out to the yard to do those manly things (not being sexist.. so don't go there :D) with edging the sidewalks.. and in the midst of that task, it hit me like a ton of bricks that I was not going to dress tonight.. i was going to stay in drab and enjoy the evening as such..

and for the life of me, i can not explain why????? :straightface::sad:

any of you girls had this experience?

Hugs,

[AllieSF]

Yes, that has happened to me. At first I couldn't figure it out. But now I have come to realize that is me telling me to take a break for the day or for however long. I tend to make plans to dress ahead of time (that is to beat those logistical problems of getting dressed and then out of the house) whether I will be going out or not. If I see an opportunity coming up, I try to plan for it. That does not mean that I actually will be going out. When the opportunity arrives, I just may be in the mood to do something else, i.e. nothing in male mode and not do the work to be able to go out as her. Since I cannot dress casually at home with the associated minimal prep time, I end up in male mode for the evening. So now that I am comfortable with that, I just go with the flow and be me or her depending on how I feel and my personal logistics at the moment.

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

Yeah, it's happened to me before too, but I guess I don't think it's that big of a deal. If you view your dressing as more of a hobby, then it kind of makes sense that sometimes you're just not in the mood for it. I mean there's been plenty of times for example where my plan was to do something, such as go out and see a movie, or even just make some dinner, play video games or watch a movie, and I'm super excited to do it earlier in the day but sometime between then and when it rolls around, I just decide, eh, you know, I'm just not in the mood and I do something else entirely.

Dressing is the same way, especially if I have no plans to go out. I get home and I think, man it sure can be a lot of work for just sitting around at home. And I just don't do it. I actually noticed that happening a lot more around the time I decided to go out in public dressed, I think I was over the thrill of wearing clothes at home for no reason. I'd sometimes get all dressed up and then be like "ok.. now what?" and then i'd just change back out of the clothes.

[Rebecca Lynn 33]

I had this same thing happen Tuesday. I was at home trying to figure out what I was going to wear. Then a customer called and said he had his driveway prepped. He needed me to sealcoat it. It took two and a half hours and when I got home I had no desire.
I went on a shopping spree august 17. I slept partially dressed. and was so excited about getting dressed again. I went to work and fell off a roof and getting injured. I have found since it happened I've finally got time but no desire to dress. I can't wait until I get the urge again.:daydreaming:
Rebecca

[Marissa]

Thank you all for the replies.. and I would have to agree with you all.. its just like craving pizza all day and then..hmmm happy a burger and fries.. okay, maybe not the same..but anyway.. :D

See it as a hobby??? not sure... playing a guitar is like a hobby.. dressing is like exploring another side of me..:daydreaming: okay..maybe someone can explain it to sound like the same thing but i don't see it.

i'll add one bit of tidbit.. its also about missing a relationship with a woman..as man and woman.. guess that came from my so called chat with the ex.. that can go as deep to face that not many women out there want a man who dresses.. okay..grab a couch and lets talk about your relationship with your mother... not again..:eek:

i do understand what you all mean and i know sometimes it just happens.. but for most that have the free time and the opportunity, they wouldn't past it up..and here, i am..

Hugs,

[Emily01]

it has happened to me and for me the reason is quite simple....i have pretty high standards for my appearance and if i don't have the energy or enthusiasm to make the effort i'd rather not bother. i've made half-a**ed efforts in the past and it was so disappointing that i've learned not to bother. i suppose sometimes it just doesn't pay to have such high standards! lol....thanks for asking!

[Deborah Jane]

It has happened quite often and still does. Sometimes I think about it on and off all day, making plans on what to wear with which wig, etc, but by the time I get home from work or wherever else i've been, I find I just can't be bothered with shaving, putting on makeup, etc, so I don't bother "dressing" at all.
Other times I don't plan it, but i'm "dressed" within an hour of getting home :)

[sheidelmeidel]

Yes. It happens as often as not. It's just too much work!

[Crysten]

I've found that this particular "issue" - if you can call it that - has subsided with me since I started under-dressing 24/7. Since I'm always partially dressed, without a choice really (I don't own any mens underwear at all) it's that much easier to take the next several steps when I have the chance. Which isn't too often at the moment, with the kids around.

[Jonianne]

It has happened quite often and still does. Sometimes I think about it on and off all day, making plans on what to wear with which wig, etc, but by the time I get home from work or wherever else i've been, I find I just can't be bothered with shaving, putting on makeup, etc, so I don't bother "dressing" at all.
Other times I don't plan it, but i'm "dressed" within an hour of getting home :)

For those of us that feel this way, I think this is very healthy. We give ourselves the freedom to present ourselves as we actually feel in the moment and don't lock ourselves into a specific gender.

In your case Deb, I bet if Sheila wanted to go out with Debs that evening, then even though you may not feel like doing all the makeup and stuff, you would still do it for her and then later be so glad you did!

[Joanne f]

:rofl: We have some of those things that are plan breakers commonly known as children. :bonk::ohgoon:

[Jeanna]

Thank you all for the replies.. and I would have to agree with you all.. its just like craving pizza all day and then..hmmm happy a burger and fries.. okay, maybe not the same..but anyway.. :D

See it as a hobby??? not sure... playing a guitar is like a hobby.. dressing is like exploring another side of me..:daydreaming: okay..maybe someone can explain it to sound like the same thing but i don't see it.

i'll add one bit of tidbit.. its also about missing a relationship with a woman..as man and woman.. guess that came from my so called chat with the ex.. that can go as deep to face that not many women out there want a man who dresses.. okay..grab a couch and lets talk about your relationship with your mother... not again..:eek:

i do understand what you all mean and i know sometimes it just happens.. but for most that have the free time and the opportunity, they wouldn't past it up..and here, i am..

Hugs,

There is nothing wrong with feeling the way that you do. You have the freedom and time to dress whenever you wish. So of course you may just want to lounge around in drab,my wife does, everybody does.It may just be a lot of bother some nights to get all dressed up. It's also better to garden or paint a kitchen boy's clothes.I would certainly miss a woman more than my panty hose as well, for I am a cross dresser, nothing more.
Enjoy life, no worries,,,

Jeanna

[allisonrn06]

When the nest emptied for my wife and I, I figured, great lots of dress up time now. And while I did end up dressing more initially, I've slowed down lately. Occasional unannounced visitors dropping over have me a little afraid - it causes a problem where I have to duck into the bathroom and change quickly, or ignore the knock at the door. Or not dress at all, at least till later in the evening, which I guess then does lead to an occasional "I don't feel like doing it now".

[Angie G]

No it hasn't But I have had my plans changed on me kids over or the such. And Monday's got changed I have to work.:hugs:
Angie

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

See it as a hobby??? not sure... playing a guitar is like a hobby.. dressing is like exploring another side of me..:daydreaming: okay..maybe someone can explain it to sound like the same thing but i don't see it.

Well, at first glance, "hobby" might sound a little more lax than most of us consider our dressing to be, I didn't really mean to imply that this wasn't something you take seriously, but more like how your post title mentions part-time girls. Dressing for you isn't something you always feel compelled to do, it's just something you like to do sometimes.

However, are hobbies not expressions of parts of ourselves? It's interesting that you chose guitar as your go to example of a different hobby. Do you play guitar? I don't play an instrument but I've always sort of wished I'd learned to. I have to imagine though that you're not simply content to be technically proficient and that's the only appeal. One picks up an instrument because one has a song in one's heart, do they not?

Truly what is so different about the two activities that makes one a hobby and the other one not? You practice at the guitar, learning chords and techniques with the goal being to bring out the music inside you, even if that is something that is never truly achieved but rather is constantly strived for. Sounds a heck of a lot like practicing applying makeup and coordinating outfits to bring out the feminine aspects inside you.





i do understand what you all mean and i know sometimes it just happens.. but for most that have the free time and the opportunity, they wouldn't past it up..and here, i am..

Hugs,

It's a little funny to read this because I think this is probably one of the rare times I've seen a crossdresser feel guilty about NOT dressing up. I mean, I've certainly kicked myself when I've blown chances to dress in public, because of not realizing the opportunity or because of being scared.

But really Cassey, life is too short to feel guilty that you didn't do something you didn't want to do. Just because you like to crossdress doesn't mean you have to. Not feeling like it sometimes is perfectly natural and healthy and I don't think you should beat yourself up about it when you don't.

[Annie D]

It's not only dressing but any activity that you might have planned. You have just put in a hard or stressful week working, you look forward to doing something special on the week end but you have some family/personal odd jobs that need to be done first and then you say to yourself that "I can enjoy myself just as much if......".

I think that it happens to all of us and you need to take a few minutes to relax; it might be sitting and reflecting about the week or even taking a short nap. When I do that, it seems that I regain the energy to fulfill my original plans.

I am not saying that I am any busier than anyone else but with all the responsibilities that most of us face during the week, we need to re-charge our batteries and what better way but take a few minutes/hours and be the person I am most comfortable being.

[Marissa]

One picks up an instrument because one has a song in one's heart, do they not?

Sounds a heck of a lot like practicing applying makeup and coordinating outfits to bring out the feminine aspects inside you.

It's a little funny to read this because I think this is probably one of the rare times I've seen a crossdresser feel guilty about NOT dressing up.

But really Cassey, life is too short to feel guilty that you didn't do something you didn't want to do.

Not feeling like it sometimes is perfectly natural and healthy and I don't think you should beat yourself up about it when you don't.

Alyssa, thank you for the reply..but have to say after reading your response, I sure felt like I was on the couch :D

I enjoyed the guitar analagy (sp) and especially how we 'attempt' to play due to a song in our head.. that is so true.

You and others here have made me understand that its not something to be guilty of...and yes at times I feel it, but not sure why, but now I do see some of the reasons and can let them go.

I also know that my mind can change if my day has changed.

I have spent alot of time here making comments and replies to others, mostly in the manner of humor which not sure anyone realizes that my humor is my serious answer. :sad: Anyway, I have had this in my head for a while and thought I would just let it out there for all to respond to and maybe others would feel at ease if it happens to them.

Part-time..only because I'm not sure I would want to take that leap or if its something I want to introduce to a relationship.. That's another chunk of my mind that can be discussed on the next session :D

Thank you all for the responses.. it helps..

Hugs,

[Crissy Kay]

I pretty much have to agree with Alyssa on this. A lot of times I just don"t feel like it, even though I may have the time etc. I guess a lot of us part timers are in the same boat so to speak!!!!

[suchacutie]

With life as complicated as it is for me and my wife, we do usually try to plan for Tina's "visits", and sometimes the plan works. Other times we just get too tired, or we get on to other things that seem more important at the time.

I actually think this is healthy. Tina is a high-maintenace girl, and I would imagine most of you think of your femme side in the same way if you are a part-timer. It would seem to me to be quite negative to force the issue of transforming and then just not be into it!

You might remember the old candy bar commercial...."sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't". Works for me!

tina!

[Marissa]

With all you girls have shared, which I'm thankful for..and hope others who may feel as I do, find some peace of mind in this..

I just got home from a night out.. wow.. i was so surprised in it all.. i felt more at ease..once i had a drink of course.. :D

Chatted with a few GGs who complimented me or at least shared their views.. was finally dragged out to the dance floor by a gg so that was nice.. and the rest was good friends.. so i'm happy that i didn't pass up tonight.. even though I almost did..

guess tonight i 'felt like a nut'.. :daydreaming:

[Lucy Long Legs]

Yes, I've had this feeling too. It's difficult to predict when Lucy wants to visit, but sometimes there's no stopping her. Strange to say, I think she likes to visit for a few days each month and I think there is a monthly cycle going on here. When this time comes around, I feel like Lucy even when not dressed and in non-Lucy type situations. If it's not time for Lucy, that's when purges tend to happen as I sometimes think she's gone away for good. I've learnt now that she always comes back, thank goodness! Lucy

[PaulaJaneThomas]

Unless I've arranged to go out on the razzle, I never plan these things down to hours and minutes.

[Paula W]

It happens to me fairly often. I only dress around the house and don't get to do it very often because of my living situation but I do get at least one night a week where I have some time to myself and I get to dress without worry.

During the week I kind of look forward to it but sometimes when the time rolls around for some reason or another I just don't feel the urge to do it. Its not a big deal to me to miss out on my weekly chance as I tend to go into spurts of having the desire to cd and then go long periods of time without it, although I can't really explain why, it just happens.

[Marissa]

With all the great responses, which I thank each of you.. i've come to realize I'm 'normal'... hmmm can I really say that if i'm a cd?????????:D:D:D

Guess if your full time or made the leap over, part-time is just that..part-time, whether its based on opportunity or desire..

loved the 'monthly cycle' comment.. last about a week?!? hmm would that be in the same cycle as SO for those who have one???? :D

again, thank you for letting me see the light in this pink world :daydreaming:

Hugs,

[Lorna]

I don't get many opportunities to dress - and I am strictly an "at home" dresser anyway. It used to be the case that I would try to dress whenever possible, even if only for a very short time but now I am (much) older I quite often decide not to bother. It is quite an effort to access my storage space, change all my clothes and then, maybe less than an hour later, have to reverse the process. Add to that the restricted movement, even within my house, because of the physical layout and location which would make me very liable to being seen,,,,all of which means that unless it's after dark, I can't do very much while dressed anyway.

Sometimes, though, I have been looking forward to dressing for several days and have planned a particular combination of clothes or thought of some activity to do while dressed, and then it's all worthwhile, despite the effort and time needed, and my dressing needs are satisfied once more.