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DaphneGrey
09-06-2009, 08:36 PM
As many of you may remember, some time back I started a thread "Out in the open and incredibly lonely" I was going out a lot to bars and clubs, shopping and so forth. Although exciting it left me very lonely. I got lots of great advice and warm hugs and well wishes from all of you, they moved me quite deeply.

In June of this year I spent an entire vacation as Daphnie. A week in in manhattan, Museums, Clubs, Shopping even made a friend or two. Well at the very least friendly and keep in touch on facebook kind of friends. But hey I will take it.

Today I did something I never in a million years would have guessed I would do. I went to Church! I talked this over with my wife and she thought it would be a good Idea for Daphnie to have something to do that didn't involve A club or bar. So a while back we watched a documentary about Jay Baker called one punk under god who started a church in a bar in Atlanta for disenfranchised people who felt they had no church where they felt welcome. Today Jay and his staff hold services every sunday at Pete's Candy Store in Brooklyn. His ministry is called Revolution.

Today Mrs Daphnie took the kids so I could make myself pretty, She let me borrow her favorite bag, smiling as she left this morning said to me "Say a prayer for my friend lisa, and have fun"

I got ready and headed of to Brooklyn, normally about forty minutes off peak but today took a little over an hour and a half. I found the place ok and caught the tail end of the sermon. I will listen to the rest online. After the service Jay Invited me to join him and his friends for a drink, I accepted and had a nice conversation about who I was and why I felt the need to be there. I met some great guys and girls, and we went to little restaurant around the corner for dinner and some more conversation.

I left after dinner, leaving them with my contact info as they are always planning special outings in the city to see movies, music, cook outs and so forth. That they would love to have me come. I left feeling with a contentment that I have not felt in years.

It was wonderful to be myself, and pray in the company of others who couldn't care less how I was dressed. I felt pretty and feminine and at peace I am so happy:D For finding these wonderful people and for being married to a woman who knows whats good for me before I do. And for all of you:love: Thanks for the encouragement.

sherri52
09-06-2009, 08:41 PM
God does love us all

paulaN
09-06-2009, 08:46 PM
Well that's good. I hope it works for you and your loved ones. It sure won't hurt getting a little closer to the big guy up there.

Joni Marie Cruz
09-06-2009, 09:12 PM
Huge hug for you, Daphnie. I think of you often and I'm glad to hear things are going well.

Hugs...Joni Mari

Kathi Lake
09-06-2009, 10:23 PM
Excellent!

Remember though, it's not about where we feel comfortable. It's not about where we think we fit in. It's not about us at all. It's about going where God tells us to go. Then, and only then will all be right.

Kathi

DaphneGrey
09-06-2009, 10:32 PM
Excellent!

Remember though, it's not about where we feel comfortable. It's not about where we think we fit in. It's not about us at all. It's about going where God tells us to go. Then, and only then will all be right.

Kathi

Thanks Kathi
For the perspective definitely food for thought. I will try to listen during this journey.

DaphneGrey
10-14-2009, 04:55 AM
Just an update. It has been a month since I started going to Revolution and it has been great. I have heard some great sermons and made a couple of friends. The cool thing about it is my gender or gender expression rarely comes up in conversation. I am simply treated as Daphne no more and no less. There has not been anyone who even batted an eye or gave a second glance. They are with out a doubt the most non judgmental group of people I have ever met.

Paster Jay Bakers sermons really hit home as well.

Miranda09
10-14-2009, 08:09 AM
Good for you Daphne. I so happy for you that things are working out nicely. I wish you all the best on your long journey. :)

JennyS.
10-14-2009, 09:00 AM
Daphne, that is a great experience, I'm sure. I'm glad you found a place to listen and make new friends. Spirituality is important to me as well. I found a church in my city that is very accepting. No one there cares whether I'm dressed or not. It's a great place to reflect and pray.

I'm really happy for you and your family. It must be wonderful to have such an understanding wife and now an extended family.

Angie G
10-14-2009, 09:23 AM
Good for you Daphne sounds like a good path to be taking Hun. Glad it give you a good feeling.:hugs:
Angie

sherri
10-14-2009, 11:55 AM
Just an update. It has been a month since I started going to Revolution and it has been great. I have heard some great sermons ... Paster Jay Bakers sermons really hit home as well.That makes the experience very special. There are MCC churches around the country that offer similarly accepting environments, but the caliber of the leadership and quality of the services sometimes leave something to be desired. It's great that you've found both -- and I'm sure that in time you will contribute as much as anyone.


The cool thing about it is my gender or gender expression rarely comes up in conversation. I am simply treated as Daphne no more and no less.See, that really pushes my buttons, in a good way. I don't at all mind talking about gender issues with someone who genuinely wants to know more, but secretly all I really want is for it to be a non-issue. I love it when we can move on to more interesting things. I'd say you have your head on straight, gurlfriend. :)

Hope
10-14-2009, 06:27 PM
There are MCC churches around the country that offer similarly accepting environments, but the caliber of the leadership and quality of the services sometimes leave something to be desired. It's great that you've found both -- and I'm sure that in time you will contribute as much as anyone.

As a card carrying member of the clergy (yes we have cards) I too rented "One Punk Under God" from netflix - and I personally thought it made Jay Baker look like an incompetent little twerp who was likely doing more harm than good. And that is not ageism talking, if memory serves he and I were born in the same month, definitely in the same year. So I am glad to hear that my perception was perhaps more a product of the editing than it was a product of Jay's behavior - or at the very least I am glad that someone is benefiting from his work.

On the other hand, I am surprised to find a disappointing critique of the MCC. While certainly the culture of any congregation can be almost anything from great to horrible, - I have known my MCC colleagues to be good folks over all, able theologians, and very competent leaders. Knowing that the MCC has some significant ordination requirements I have always felt comfortable recommending the MCC to folks without much hesitation.

sherri
10-14-2009, 08:07 PM
On the other hand, I am surprised to find a disappointing critique of the MCC. While certainly the culture of any congregation can be almost anything from great to horrible, - I have known my MCC colleagues to be good folks over all, able theologians, and very competent leaders. Knowing that the MCC has some significant ordination requirements I have always felt comfortable recommending the MCC to folks without much hesitation.Well, don't take it personally, and I do not wish to hijack this thread. I'm sure there are some excellent MCCs out there, but I know from firsthand experience that "MCC" is not an automatic imprimatur of excellence. My comment was in no way a reflection of the congregations I've encountered, who are consistently sweet spirited, nor am I impugning anyone's character. Moreover, I've been grateful to have some place to attend without fear of prejudice. But as someone steeped in church and once ordained myself (admittedly in a more traditional denomination), I've needed more than acceptance and my exposure to MCC thus far left me feeling spiritually undernourished. One disappointment has been the caliber of preaching I've heard there, and another that really surprised me in particular was an absence of progressive energy and contemporary sensibility that is fueling much of today's Christianity.

This subject actually came up recently in a gathering of my GLBT friends and the consensus of the group was as I've just described. I heard terms like "boring", "depressing", "flaky" and "unsatisfying". So I'm definitely not the only one who feels this way. And no, I didn't raise the subject or set the tone of the discussion, either.

Now having said all that, the next time I have the opportunity, I fully intend to attend an MCC in a major metro market to see if maybe my experience is more a matter of demographics than doctrine. And no matter what else I find, I will once again be grateful for a place to worship in a skirt and I betcha I come away feeling good about the sweet people I meet there.

So you're more than welcome to have the last word on this subject if you wish. Like I said, I don't want to hijack Daphne's thread, cuz the point she's making and the experience she is sharing is a really important one. I was very touched by it.

DaphneGrey
10-15-2009, 05:28 AM
As a card carrying member of the clergy (yes we have cards) I too rented "One Punk Under God" from netflix - and I personally thought it made Jay Baker look like an incompetent little twerp who was likely doing more harm than good. And that is not ageism talking, if memory serves he and I were born in the same month, definitely in the same year. So I am glad to hear that my perception was perhaps more a product of the editing than it was a product of Jay's behavior - or at the very least I am glad that someone is benefiting from his work.

On the other hand, I am surprised to find a disappointing critique of the MCC. While certainly the culture of any congregation can be almost anything from great to horrible, - I have known my MCC colleagues to be good folks over all, able theologians, and very competent leaders. Knowing that the MCC has some significant ordination requirements I have always felt comfortable recommending the MCC to folks without much hesitation.

When I watched One Punk Under God all I saw was a young man who was doing his best to bring Gods grace and love to a group of people who were disenfranchised by the traditional church. A young man through no fault of his own lived through the most infamous scandal in American history. Who became an outcast because his father fell from grace. A man who watched his family dissolve and lived through his forging years listening to american pop culture shred what little dignity his parents had left. He spiraled into a self destructive pattern finding Gods grace, pulling himself out of that part of his life. And then watching his mother suffer horribly from cancer. All the while starting and growing a ministry aimed at bringing gods grace to societies out casts!

He is without a doubt the most sincere and honest person I have ever met. He is a very able Pastor. He certainly does more good than harm and there are quite a few someone's benefiting from his work.

The unique thing about Jay is that he presents his humanity unfiltered before his congregation. He is in every sense of the word an open book. The only Pastor I have ever had who was.

His message is quite simple as I see it. God Loves You and so do I. not God Loves You If or when just God Loves you. Couple that with his unique desire to reach out to the people no one wants to touch, people like me and other societal misfits and you have a true treasure of a human being. Not by any means an incompetent little twerp. I am blessed to have him as my pastor and honored to call him a friend. And somehow I think he has the whole grace thing right.

Anyway this thread was not about theology or about One Punk Under God for that matter, but I appreciate your post any way.