comming out to your SO

[Angie F]

I'm just courious on the different ways everyone came out to thier SO.
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For me, aftre my wife took over a pair of Dale Earnheart Jr. pajama pants I had, when I asked her if I was ever getting them back she said no, but I could have a pair of hers if I wanted! I don't think the thought even occured to her that I truely wanted them :heehee: So without saying anything else I went to our room and put on a pair of her panties, matching bra and a light blue flowered pair of her jammies ( if only she would have had a nightgown )
When I came out of the room she looked and smiled, then asked if I was wearing a bra:eek: I told her yes, along with matching panties....she told me that was fine, and that it was a fair trade to her, and not to ask for the Dale JR. jammies back again! I was in heaven :daydreaming: we spent the rest of the evening with her asking questions, as I told her that I know in my heart that I should have been born a woman.....we are now looking into electrolysis for me, as well as getting me started on hormones :D
She is so supporting and wonderful :love:

[Kerigirl2009]

I told my wife while we where on a family vacation, we put the kids to bed and headed down to the karoake bar to get some adult time together. on the way back to the room we started talking about memories from childhood and one thing led to another and as she already knew that silk panties is a downfall for me. I told her know you don't understand " I want to wear those panties still" andshe was confused andthen i said " I like to wear women's clothes" and she said "well I know you do" and I said " No I mean everything panties, bras, women's clothes still"
It was at that point that she became concerned so we continued our walk around the resort walking along the beach we actually walked for a couple of hours until about 3am up and down the shoreline of Gull Lake. we then hugged and went to sleep.
We are still coming to grips with this as she is figuring out more about how much I dress and how much I truly enjoy it.:)

[AmiFL]

A long time ago my wife and I were dating. we were at my house drinking wine and talking about alot of things. The conversation went onto her legs (which are rather shapely) Then I told her so were mine ( I was told for years that I had really nice girl legs for a guy) So I bet her that mine were as nice. She seemed receptive so ran upstairs and put on a short black skirt, matching top, all the right pads and tucks and my wig. Then I changed into a short denim skirt and red top.

Well, she was amused that night and had fun with it, comparing our legs and rubbing our stockings together. However, the next day she was weirded out about it.
She made me promise never to dress again (I failed miserably at that one) Now in any heated discussion she brings up my crossdressing and threatens to "out me". She is 1000% totally unsupportive.

My advice to anyone is "baby steps"............ Before you blurt out about you dressing, feel her out (and up while you probe her feelings) But most of all, be prepared for the worse reaction.

Ami

[Ballerina]

Before my GF and I got fully back together, I had told her that I had a secret in my life that I needed to share with her. Took me 2 days to get the courage up. I wasn't even visiting forums, or looking at sites, either. When I finally told her, I had said, "you know how we always joked about me wearing tights and a tutu, and calling me Sally?" Paused with my heart racing a mile a minute. "It wasn't necessarily a joke.. I want to dress up like that".

All she did was sit there for a while, and processed it. She finally asked the "are you gay" question, and then many other questions came after that.

I think the hardest part of it was the fact that I felt ashamed that I wanted to dress like a woman. I felt like I was doing something wrong and embarassing at the time. Of course, I'm WAY past those feelings now, lol. And now-a-days, my GF is OK with the idea of me dressing up. I think the only thing that she is afraid of is her being afraid of being afraid (if that made sence, lol).

[Angie G]

Angie that is so cool. You go girl.:hugs:
Angie G

[Ashley_in_Texas]

My wife and I had been married for 5 years already, and I decided to tell her. (It took so long because I had been cheated on by my ex-wife, and there were trust issues. The ex-wife never knew about Ashley.) I wanted to tell here for so long, but I had to plan it very carefully. On Halloween a few years back, we were sitting around watching tv, and I said, "too bad we can't have a costume party, you know, just the two of us." She said "Thats a cool idea". So I told her that I think I still have my costume from years back, and that I would put it on if she promised not to laugh. She said ok, and asked what the costume was. I told here she would have to wait and see it. She asked me what she should wear, so I told here to dress like a prostitute. She laughed and said "ok, sounds fun". So I put on a short black dress, white stockings, high heels, wig, etc., but no makeup. We met in the living room, and when she saw me, she said "OH MY GOD! You have GREAT legs." and giggled a little. My costume was supposed to be a dead prostitute. Anyway, we had a great night.....a realy great night....wow. BUT.... I STILL HAD NOT TOLD HER. So I waited a year, after letting her see me dressed and getting her reaction. Then, a week or so before Halloween, we were laying in bed, talking. I asked her what we should do for Halloween. We discussed different Ideas back and forth, and then kissed goodnight. I layed awake for 30 minutes or so, then reached over and touched her, and asked if we could talk. She said "sure, whats wrong?" I said, "remember last Halloween, when we dressed in those costumes?" "Yes, that was fun" she said. I told her, "well...umm...I liked it alot. As a matter of fact, I I have always liked it, but not just on Halloween". "OH YEA?" she said "Tell me more". So I proceded to explain things. She was OK with it, then upset, about a week later, and now she is totaly for it, and we even go shopping together!

[JamieG]

About a year after we had married, my wife and I were sitting in our living room having drinks and talking about all sorts of things. My dressing had accelerated in that year and we were starting to talk about the possibility of children, so telling her had been eating at me for some time. After talking about various problems she was experiencing with one of her friends, she said "You always seem so normal. Don't you ever have any problems?" The combination of the liquor and having the urge to come clean bubbling up in me, just led me to come out with it: "I like to wear women's clothes." She asked if I was gay or transexual, and I replied no to both questions. She then said that's okay and joked that we should dress up as Magenta and Columbia and go see the Rocky Horror Picture Show sometime. We went to bed that night with me feeling like a weight had been lifted off my chest.

The next morning was not so good. I woke up to find that she had slept on the couch most of the night. She couldn't get the image of me dressed as a woman out of her head and it freaked her out. She considered heading home, but didn't know how to explain it to her mother. She said that she felt like I had trapped her in marriage, and that I should have revealed this to her when she revealed some deep personal secrets to me. I tried to explain that I didn't know at the time how important crossdressing was to me, and that I thought at the time that being married would at least minimize the need, if not make it go away entirely. She was not satisfied. The next few weeks were the darkest period in our relationship. She seriously considered divorce and I was seriously depressed.

It all changed when my parents came for a visit that was planned before my confession. We decided to pretend to be happy for their sake, and by some magic at the end of the day, the pretending turned to true happiness. Apparently, in seeing me interact with my parents, and by forcing herself to interact with me, she realized that I was still basically the same person. We kissed, cuddled and went to bed happy for the first time in weeks. Since then (about seven years), we have been working on how my CDing fits in our lives. Generally, we both feel that sharing my secret has brought us closer together. However, at times my wife will use it to hurt me in an argument. In the long run though, I have seen gradual growing acceptance on her part. Although, it has been rough at times, I am glad that I came out to her, and only wish that I could have told her sooner. In retrospect, I probably should have entered it with more planning and information.

Jamie

[Alice B]

Coming out to a SO or spouse is not an easy thing to do, but it sounds as if you wife is the exception to the rule for most of us and you are very lucky. That said realize that the road is not always smooth and at times it can be rocky. But, with open communication and honesty it get better and better.

[Sherry-Stephanie]

Don't ask....my result although initially it was good eventually crashed and burned....but other facts were prsent that didn't include dressing so we'd eventually go up in smoke reguardless...but things are oK we're passed the hurt i think and now looking forward to going in different directions and things are looking up as well for me...finding people who are oK with me the way I am and who I am....and so far it's working...the wife has issues as well and I'll let her deal with them on her terms and without me from here on out....best to her and we move on...