Timing, Ooooops

[Teri Jean]

As you have read I am moving towards transitioning and have been actively coming out to those I felt I needed to inform before going full time. Well I think I kind of goofed by informing the District and Post commanders before coming out at work. Talk from the Legion members and spouses has filtered into the work place and the rumor mill kicked in today. :doh:

A co-worker came to me about the rumors being spread and asked if I had heard the rumors. I said I had not but they must be right but they probably will be made public in a couple weeks. :heehee: I didn't think of that angle when deciding how to reveal my TG feelings. Oh well, hide sight is 20/20.

Last night at the close of group therapy I was talking with a dear friend and the comment of the best laid plans usually are disrupted somehow. Well Pam, you won that bet, LOL, :hugs: anyway we adlib at work until it is official. Right, you bet, sure enough, maybe next time. At least it wasn't the IT department this time. LOL Huggs Teri :love:

[Jessinthesprings]

That's strange how somethign seemingly compleatly independent still has ties. Small world I'm sure. Ironically this may be a good thing. Kind of break the ice so it's not a compleate shock and allowing people a chance to wrap their minds around it. After they were going to know at one point or another. I wish you the best of luck with this, and continued luck that you've already experianced.

[Teri Jean]

Jess, you are so right. We try to dothe right thing and control who knows and when but as many have said, if one knows it is no longer a secret. It has nothing to do with those we tell but the human nature will cause slip ups and or the desire to tell someone else. I just laughed it off because of comments the evening before.

Huggs Teri

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Teri......i hope it all works out for the best...doesnt seem like its going to hurt you at all....

a similar thing happened to me...in a good way though...a headhunter!!! called my work office and asked about "Kate" and knew about my transition and wanted to know if i was going to stay at work there!!! how cool his that...? but how the F### did he know about it? only about 10 people at work know...a friend of mine said 10? might as well be infinity...heh

[joanlynn28]

We've all made mistakes similar to what happened to you Teri. Before I came out at work I would go out with my best friend/sister to dinner or what not all of the time. One of my coworkers I think lived in the area that we would frequent and by the way he acted towards me I knew that he had seen me outside of work as my true self. To make matters worse I left my cell phone in one of the bathroom stalls and I am sure that he found it, and of course I had my name programmed into the startup page. So there were plenty of coworkers that knew about my transition at work long before I made it public. It is just something all of us here end up experiencing. No matter how hard one tries to keep it secret until we are ready to tell all, things just happen to out ourselves to the world.

[CharleneT]

Hey Teri ,

So it seems to be ok, but thanks for telling us about this. There are many different ways to have our "coming out info" spread without us realizing it ! I guess good planning is important as well as the ability to roll with the random events ;-) !!!

I'm self employed and with a small customer base. Hence it is important for me to be careful in how I come out to them. I worry about this very issue right now, as I am slowly informing my customers. BUT KM is right, 10 people is like telling the whole world in some ways. All it takes is one person who likes to gossip and BadaBing, seems to be on the evening news.

Trying to let it spread the "right" way is sorta like a chess game :confused3:

Charlene

[pamela_a]

Listen to your sister...sometimes she's right :doh:

Everything will work out and I know you'll do just fine. You're on your way now and there's no going back. You're a great person and that's the most important thing anyone who really knows you understands...no matter how you look.

Just keep smiling, the 1st isn't that far away anymore.

Hugs.

-Pam-

[sherri52]

Word of mouth is the fastest way to communicate

[pamela_a]

Word of mouth is the fastest way to communicateI grew up believing the 3 fastest methods of communication were telephone, telegraph, and tell a woman.

-Pam-

[Kaitlyn Michele]

but not in that order...!!!

throw in the internet and look out!!! :heehee:

[Teri Jean]

Well Pam and girls the word is definately out and the HR director has moved meeting up to minimize the miss information part of the rumor mill. As I'm finishing the day I get a call from my director of Physical Plant (we maintain and repair the buildings) and he said there was talk about my transitioning and offered his help for whatever and whenever. So as they say Murphy's Law strikes again.

Now some may see this as a setback I find this as a way to say why wait till the first of October, okay I did agree to the start date but it would be fun to "Shock the world". For those of us from Minnesota that was a bad analogy as it came from a Governor that I felt as less than stellar. This whole glitch in a plan has me smiling and thinking I should have seen this coming but so what.

Have a great weekend because I am. Huggs and love. Teri

[Eileen]

Great attitude Terri Jean!

Eileen

[pamela_a]

Only the best to you Teri no matter what you decide. But this is exactly why I no longer believe in Murphy's law but am a firm believer in O'Toole's Commentary on Murphy's law.


For those unfamiliar with O'Toole's commentary it is "Murphy was an optomist"

Have a great weekend Teri. Monday may be more fun than you can imagine.

-Pam-

[kellycan27]

Just a wee tick..lol Nothing to do but move forward toward your ultimate goal.
May not have been exactly as planned,but the results sound good. I am happy for you.... You can dream and wonder about it, but nobody will ever know the true beauty of living the life until they experience it first hand.:hugs:
Kelly

[Teri Jean]

Monday will be fun as I know the guys I have worked with over the past 26 yrs and there will be "hell" to pay. LOLWROTF The thing is they would be doing this a week later if it had gone as planned but the thing is the news has been down sized some through the leak.

Do I care how this happened(?), not really and if I could have planned this I'm sure it would have had the same effect. The thing is like the rumor mill, it is going to happen to some degree and you cannot stop it but you can focus it. I for one in another role used it to bring out information by managers who normally would not reveiled that if it wasn't for the rumor mill. So when this happened I started to laugh as it finally came full circle so to speak.

So now do I go to work and hide(?), not in your life time. Stand tall(6'-2") and let the comments happen. Then when it is officially out there one can say, the fun is now over and let's get to work of providing the services of the department. At that time the offical stance of the university on gender ecquity will be adherred to and there will be no tollerance for discrimination. So in saying that I can be greatful for people having fun teasing but at the same time I can throw down the glove and say it stops here.

To all you girls the glove is down and the statement is; I love you all and want to thank you for your support and friendship, damn tears again.

Huggs and kisses.

Teri

[Kaitlyn Michele]

Bless you sweetie...

you are about to start a wonderful time in your life and i can see your warmth and confidence shining through in your posts!!

:drink:
kate

[Teri Jean]

Quick update; Our HR director started the meetings with managers and staff today and seems like it is going smoothly. one of my co-workers came over after their meeting to wish me well and offer his support.

Last night I spent about three hrs talking with my oldest brother and his wife and they to are accepting but during the conversation it is revieled to me that my brothers wife has a relative in the area that is also transitioning. Wow!!
So after we had a great evening they said they would talk with her and see if she would like to meet me for coffee or such.

FYI Teri

[Marcia Blue]

I am glad to here that things are going well. The support of family and friends must be a great comfort.
I wish you the best of luck in your journey.